Crystal Memory (Remember Me?)
by LilaacStars
Summary: Ladybug disappeared 5 years and 11 months ago, and no one knows where she is. Adrien left Paris 6 years ago, but now he is back. Back with only one mission: To find his Lady. But after 6 years everything changes... well, everything expect true love feelings. (also on AO3)
1. In Which We Know Why Adrien is Back

Adrien was fixing his hair in front of a mirror. He had let it grow and it always ended up looking messy and a bit spiky, he loved to wear his hair like that, but today it wasn't the smartest option.

He had to look polish and serious, he had to look like others professors did. At least he had to look like that on his first day as a teacher, to make a good impression, to impose respect between their students, then he could loosen up but the first impression had to be a memorable one.

He went to open the cabinet at his right and reached for the hair gel on the second shelf. He rolled the tap open and looked right into the cold, blue gel. He placed his fingers on it to take a tiny bit of it before putting on his hair.

He brushed through his roots from the sunburns to the ends, trying to tame his blonde hair. The result, as he expected, was disastrous.

He was a mess and he looked like a nerd. Which Plagg made sure to remind him

"You look like an absolute nerd" The kwami flied by his side, holding a salad cookie. Along the years, Adrien had finally convinced him to try new foods.

"I have never tried to style my hair, I always get out of the shower and let it dry"

"Didn't you learn anything on your model days?!"

"In those days my hair was touched more for hair dressers than myself" He sighed "I look ridiculous, no one is going to take me serious"

"C'mon, Adrien, it's their first day too, those students will be more worried of not passing out than your hair" Plagg sighed "Wash your hair once again and take that disgusting thing of you, Golden Locks

Adrien laughed and did as Plagg said.

He walked to his room and admired it with a smile.

It was a room five times smaller than his childhood room, but bigger than his university room, which made it perfect, it was a normal size. In it fitted a king size bed with a little night stand at is side, a desk and a drawer, with a good amount of space in between every piece of furniture. The bed counted with black sheets and green pillows, something he had done on propose, while the desk and drawers was white as the rest of the lights and things on the room.

Hanging above the night stand was a collage of pictures. Pictures from his high school years, pictures from university, pics with friends and modeling partners, and one with his father.

At the other side of the room, beside the black clock, framed on silver there was one of him as Chat and Ladybug. It was a picture of them where they weren't wearing their typical suites but clothes the magazine who had ordered the pictures had given to them. They still were wearing their masks, and as both of them were transformed the magic of the masks still worked, not letting them known who they were.

It was Adrien's favorite picture.

Ladybug was wearing a red office pant and a red blazer with a cheer black blouse under nit; while he was wearing a black tuxedo with a green bow tie. While Ladybug was the image of polish and perfection, he was a mess in a really expensive suite.

Also one of the reasons why he loved it so much, was because of the pose. Ladybug was with her hands on her hips in a very Wonder Woman stand, while he was holding her hips and leaving a kiss on her cheek. Ladybug was rolling her eyes at this.

It was a picture out of take, it was improvised by him and it ended up on the magazine.

That picture had been taken 6 years ago. Almost as long as the last time he had seen Ladybug.

The last time someone saw Ladybug was 5 years and 11 months ago. One month after Adrien left town.

Adrien had fought so hard for his father to accept his plans for the future. Quitting the modeling world, study physics and become a professor one day. He had fought like he never had before and when his father had accepted, Adrien knew it was too good to be true. There was a catch. Adrien could only study Physics if he studied abroad. His father didn't believe he would be the best in any university of Paris, so he found a good university for him in the States.

Adrien tried to fight just as hard to stay in Paris but it was useless, and for his greater good he had accepted his father's deal. Not without talking to Ladybug first.

When he told her about it (the parts he could without revealing his identity) he had shown concern about leaving her alone.

"There's no more Hawkmoth, we only look over Paris lately" That was true, after three years of fighting Hawmoth they had finally destroyed him. No more akumas, no more magic villains. Still they kept the miraculous and the superheroes jobs "I think you should do what makes you happy"

"You make me happy, my Lady"

"Dear god" She rolled her eyes and laughed "You have to do the best for your future, if I had to move abroad to go to the best place for my education, then I would, it may seem scary at first but I know it would be worth it"

And with that phrase had begun a big speech from his Lady, a speech that had convinced him to go to USA.

He had said goodbye to her, begging for an identity reveal, but it was useless, she denied it.

"You will be back on vacations and we will patrol again together, no reveal, it's safer"

"No Hawmoth, remember?"

"It's been only a few months, we still have to be careful"

"Alright, my Lady" He sighed "I'm going to miss you so badly"

"Me too" She answered and before Chat could react, she was on his arms.

They promised to text and talk once in a while, they already had their phones. A few years ago they decided it was good to buy a special phone for their civilian selves, so that wasn't a problem (Adrien was relieved)

And the promise lived on for a month. Ladybug stopped texting which worried Adrien, he called but there was no answer from her. But the answers came from the _Ladyblog_.

 _"_ _Ladybug hasn't been spotted in weeks"_

 _"_ _Where's Ladybug?" "What happened to Ladybug?"_

 _"_ _Big fire at district 9: Why wasn't Ladybug there?"_

 _"_ _No more Ladybug"_

And then the _Ladyblog_ died.

No Chat and no Ladybug around to write about.

He had felt bad for Alya, he considered calling a few times, but he hadn't really talked to her since high school; calling for a blog didn't seem really like a smart thing.

He wanted to come back to France, but his father had visited him a few times in Cambridge (which was rare) and he had let him visit Nino on the other side of the country, to LA, where Nino was living since his DJ debut.

No France till seven years later, till he had finally made a good amount of money and had been able to take money from his found.

He was back.

New apartment, new job, and apparently new city. Everything had changed so much, he had changed so much that it was hard to adapt. But it was his city after all. And most than anything it was Ladybug's city too.

Adrien would be lying if he didn't said that the real reason why he was back was to find Ladybug.

They had promised to see each other again, and he was going to stay true to his word.

Hi! thank you for reading this, hope you enjoyed :)

I remind everyone that knows me and warn everyone who doesn't that English is not my first language so if there's little mistakes I'm very sorry

Also I'm new on ff so I have no idea how all this works, I'm still trying to understand how to publish, reply, etc, so if you have questions or anything you better go to my tumblr :) : .com

:D


	2. In Which We See Old Pals

Adrien's first day was nothing like he imagined it could be.

He sincerely thought every student would hate him at the second they put an eye on him, recognizing him from his model days, from his father's renamed label or just hate the way he taught the lesson. But at the contrary, their students seem to like him very much.

Adrien tried to be as much as himself as he could but at the same time still remembering that he was a teacher. Along the years he had grown to be free and not being controlled by his father at every moment of the day had allowed him to be more Chat like than when he was in high school, finally becoming the person he always wanted to be. He was a mix of the polite, kind Adrien he was taught to be and the flirty, funny and a bit reckless Chat he had the chance to be years ago.

He had three classes in the whole day, and every single one was a new but a good surprise. He felt really confident in the classroom but walking down the hallways and in the teachers room was an awkward sensation the whole day.

Teachers were usually older, and according to a few students he heard, they weren't "attractive like him".

Alex, one of his friends in the USA had told him a million times that his attractiveness was going to be one of his problems when he finally had a job. But dealing with how he looked was nothing new, he had grown around people who cared more about his looks than what was on his mind or his feelings. So having to go through life showing that you were more than just a pretty face was a daily basis for Adrien, and at this point of life he didn't cared about it anymore.

At the end of the day he was so tired, the adrenaline of the nervous rush given by the first day had run out completely and he only wanted to go to bed.

He drove home, talking with Plagg about his day. Passing by the supermarket to get some groceries and cheese and crackers for his kwami; he had planned for it to be a short visit when a magazine had called his attention.

The cover of the magazine was a collage of pop-stars and actors, nothing interesting for Adrien, without counting the little picture of DJ Bubbler aka Nino, his best friend. But that wasn't what called his attention, it was the big bright green and black letters over the pictures:

 ** _"_** ** _First sight of Chat Noir in years!"_**

Adrien's breathe got caught on his throat. A little smile appeared on his lips and an overwhelming feeling of happiness took over him.

He only had been back in Paris for three weeks. The first one had been all about finding an apartment and buying furniture for it, while the second had been to the job interviews he had scheduled from Cambridge, and then choosing which one was his best option. Also buying a car had taken a good amount of time.

So when at the beginnings of this week when he had finally took the bravery to transform after all those years, excitement had run through his veins. Since he wasn't a hero in USA (and he didn't want to be a hero in USA; his instincts were all about running away from that) he hadn't wore the suit in six years and the familiarity had fueled him with joy, not waiting a second, he jumped out of his window and ran through Paris' roofs.

Since Ladybug and Chat Noir hadn't been news for a long time, he thought no one would care anymore, but they did, they still cared so much.

Going through the pages of the magazine he found the whole article they had written only thanks to bad resolution pictures sent by fans.

There was still a Chat Noir Fan Club, there were still blogs dedicated to them and people still idolized them. After all these years, people still loved them.

But between the whole happiness that was to see Chat Noir once again, there was fear and wonder of why he was back: there wasn't something wrong in Paris that they didn't knew? Were they in danger?

And the other question was so sad, but so expected

 ** _"_** ** _But if Chat Noir is back, where is our beloved Ladybug?. The team was inseparable years ago and saved Paris for four years. Paris could count on them with no doubt, if there was a problem, Chat and Ladybug were there… So, why did they disappear? Will Chat give us answers now that he is back? Most important: Will we see Ladybug again?"_**

Adrien put the magazine away. And walked to the cashier, trying to erase the question from his head

" _Will I see Ladybug again?"_

He shook his head and sighed.

The magazine was a good thing, if people were talking about him, Ladybug could hear about it and maybe come out from her hiding. Or that's what Adrien hoped it happened.

When Adrien was back in the apartment it was late night, and he was happy to finally take a seat on his new couch on the tiny living room. With a beer on his hand, and the remote control on the other he was ready to catch up on one of his favorite TV shows, when his phone rang.

 **Incoming call from: Chloé Bourgeois**

"Damn, I forgot" Adrien gasped and answered the phone.

" _Adrien"_

"Hi Chlo, how are you?" He said trying to sound the sweetest he could, it was always good to be nice to her from the beginning

" _I'm fine. Where are you? I'm waiting outside the restaurant as we said"_

"I'm sorry, Chlo. I'm on my way, I had a long day so I went to the apartment for a change of clothes"

 _"_ _Oh, okay, that's cool but come here fast, I'm hungry and dying to see you!"_

"Sure, Chloé, see you in a bit"

 _"_ _I hope that bit is fast-_

"It is, bye" He hanged and ran to change into more comfortable clothes. A change from the pants and grey sweater, to a pair of jeans and a white button up, taking a big coat with him just in case the weather was cold.

"Plagg you are staying here"

"Thank to the creators!" Plagg exclaimed relieved "I don't know why you are still friends with that girl, she is annoying!"

"She is an old friend, and you gotta admit she has grown a lot as a person"

Plagg rolled his eyes and flied to the plate on top of the kitchen counter, without looking back to Adrien as he said his last goodbye.

Adrien made it to the restaurant faster than he thought and he was really thankful for it.

Chloé was expecting him inside, already on their table, and when she saw him she ran from it to his arms, shouting his name in her pitchy voice.

Adrien accepted the hug and laughed at her excitement, considering they had seen each other only a few weeks ago.

They had a quiet dinner, talking about everything and nothing. Chloé was working as fashion stylist, her last project had been with a big campaign for _Galeries Lafayette_ and her good mood was contagious. Adrien told her all about his first day, and Chloé got excited for him. If he talked about this to Chloé a years ago, she would have hated every detail but completely lie about it, but now that Chloé had realized that being nice was a good thing and tell the truth was even better, being with Chloé wasn't torture. Thought she wasn't like this all the time, it was nice to know she was trying.

Dinner ended up with the two friends making plans for another time, when Chloé, who was travelling to London for a campaign with Harrods came back.

Adrien was happy that even if things had changed, he could still relay in someone.

He made his way back home with a smile on his face and a good feeling about life. If things could go this well with Chloé then finding his Lady may not be so hard as he thought it could be.

While walking up stairs to the last floor on the building (the only bad thing of the building was no elevator) he heard really loud music and hits on the door.

He ran upstairs with a bad feeling on his gut

"There's people trying to work you idiot, open the fucking door!" A petit girl was punching his apartment door with both hands.

She was wearing pink sweatpants and a long sleeved white t-shirt that hugged her body nicely. Her hair was in a messy black bun on top of her head. And Adrien could have kept staring and checking her out if she hadn't heard the creak on the stairs and turned to him.

"Are you kidding me?!" The girl pointed at Adrien and to the keys on his hands "You left the stereo with loud annoying music for hours and you weren't ever there?! I know you are new but for god's sake have a little respect!"

Adrien opened his mouth and his eyes stared at the girl

"What? You aren't going to speak?" The girl placed her hands on her hips and leaned into Adrien "I'm working and your annoying music is distracting me! Please turn it off!"

Adrien couldn't move or speak because right in front of him, grown up and more beautiful than ever, was Marinette Dupain-Cheng. And she was acting and talking (more like shouting) like she didn't knew who he was.


	3. In Which Destiny Is A Jerk

Adrien wasn't able to speak for a long time; that time was used by Marinette to keep shouting at him, using a good amount of bad words.

"I-I'm s-sorry?" Adrien whispered when he was finally able to form words

"You better are" Marinette said, this time not shouting but still with a frown on her face that showed that she wasn't over her rage just yet.

Adrien moved to his door, and placed the keys on the latch stopping just a second before opening it.

"You don't recognize me?" He gasped, turning to her "Do you know who I am?"

It made him really sad to have to ask those questions. They went to school together for four years, they were in the same group of friends, their best friends had dated making them go along in double dates. They were friends? Adrien had had a little crush on her so he spoke to her every time he could on their last year of school.

He couldn't believe he was that easy to forget

"Oh god" Marinette rolled her eyes and placed her hands on her hips. The movement was so familiar to Adrien that he smirked at it "You are one of those"

"One of what?" Adrien asked confused

"I can't believe it, this is awful!" Marinette yelled frustrated "Look, of course I know who you are, but do you think it gives you any privileges? No fucking way.

"Excuse me?"

"I don't excuse you" Marinette pointed at him "Look I don't fucking care that you are Adrien Agreste"

"Why are you shouting then? You know who I am" Adrien smiled but confusion was still all over him

"Ugh" Marinette clinched her teeth. Her hands were in fits, her head down and it looked like she was counting "Who doesn't know you?" She said in a calmer tone, no more shouting but there was still a bit of poison on her words "Anyways it doesn't matter to me, I won't treat you different because of who you are or who your father is, I treat people equally and as they deserve it. You are being really rude to the whole building, especially with me your neighbor who needs to end a project… I-i-I'm sorry I shouted… but I'm still mad!" She huffed

"A-alrgiht" Adrien answered, taking a step away. She wasn't shouting but she looked even more intimidating now.

Marinette lifted a brow and crossed her arms on her chest, making Adrien focus on it

"Hey, Agreste, the music!" She clapped in front of his face

"Yeah, yeah, going" He opened the door and ran to the living room, where on top of the stereo was Plagg eating a big piece of cheese

"You are back!" Plagg exclaimed and spun on the air

"Damn it, Plagg, I can't never leave you alone" He gasped

He turned off the stereo and ran back outside to the front hall, but Marinette was already gone. Adrien walked to her door and watched it carefully. There was a sign written n Marinette's pretty handwriting with the word _"_ _Bienvenue"_ and the number of her door down.

Adrien shook his head and read the sign again. It was Marinette's handwriting and it was pink, her favorite color, and the girl who had yelled to him had black deep hair, and big bluebell eyes, her voice was the same (even when she was mad and shouting he could recognize it) and her face full of freckles had only changed a bit, only product of the years that had passed by.

It was Marinette. No doubt about that, he could recognize her anywhere, but then why didn't she knew who he was?

Correction, she knew him. She said his name and she knew who his father was, and by the way she had treated him, she surely knew about his modeling days. But if she knew all that why didn't she remember him? Because that was going on, right? She didn't have any memory of him at all. Or was that she was just faking?

Adrien always doubted of Marinette's feelings towards him. She was so awkward around him when they were in high school and he hadn't given the most amazing first impression, but along the years he thought that maybe he had grown on her. He never could really tell if she liked him or not, but he was sure that she didn't hated him. Or so he thought till today.

Maybe Marinette did hate him, maybe she just acted nice around him in school because Nino and Alya were dating and she didn't want to make her friend mad.

He could knock the door and ask her to make his doubts go away, but it didn't seem like a good idea after Marinette's fiery rage. Who knew she had such a pouty mouth? Not him that's for sure, Marinette was always polite and sweet when they were teens. He wasn't a saint either but damn, Marinette saying swear words was something to be surprised about, it didn't go with her personality; If she still had the same personality after all these years.

He went back to his apartment, he needed to sleep, maybe he was tired and it was all a dream. Absolutely that must be!

 **...**

 **It wasn't a dream**.

Next morning when he went out of the door to drive to the university, Marinette was going out of her own apartment. Adrien couldn't help but smile at the sight of his old friend.

Marinette had in hand three big rolls of fabric, two purple folders that looked like portfolios and a pinkish bag that was open making all the tools fall from it. And that was the reason why she hadn't noticed the blonde guy looking at her.

Adrien changed his bag to the other arm and kneeled to help Marinette. That made Marinette notice he was there. She frowned at him, making Adrien retract

"Just trying to help" He smiled nervously

"Thanks but no thanks" She huffed and hurried to pick up all her tools

Adrien stood up and looked at her while she did it. He felt sad that Marinette was acting like that around him. He had called Nino last night to ask if he knew something about it, but as it was obvious, Nino didn't heard a word from Marinette since Alya and him broke up.

He didn't really spoke to any of his high school classmates anymore so he didn't have anyone else to ask. He thought of searching through the internet for accidents, sickness and memory loss articles but he knew he wouldn't find the answers he needed. He had to ask Marinette or find someone close to Marinette (Alya was his first choice but he didn't knew if they were still close)

Marinette stood up once again, still looking like she was an accident about to happen

"Are you sure you don't need help?"

"Absolutely" She said "Look I gotta run, can you move?"

"Damn, I'm just trying to be nice here" He gasped frustrated

"Don't" Marinette gasped and passed him by, walking down the stairs.

"Unbelievable" Adrien said to Plagg "She is a whole new person"

A bang and an irritated scream ringed down stairs

"I don't know, she kind of seems the same to me" Plagg said looking downstairs with a grin

Adrien rolled his eyes and made his way downstairs

 **...**

It was another good day at work for Adrien. He had the feeling that it was going to be a good year. He wasn't all sweetness today and he argued with a few students but nothing that wasn't part of being a teacher.

He could hear his female students, and a few males, swooning over him but he ignored it the whole class, not feeling awkward at all, and stood with a professional stand the whole day, which made him proud of himself.

It was a good day, yet he couldn't stop worrying about the whole Marinette thing. He replayed last night's encounter over and over again and tried to understand what was going on without any results.

At the end of the day, thanks to one comment of his students he got an idea: Social media.

He hated social media with his heart and soul. Being a teen model you would think he liked it but not at all, he felt that his privacy was corrupted, and since his life was so public all the time he liked to have a bit of privacy. Also his father had forbidden Facebook, Instagram and _"_ _any other stupid app that makes kids dumb and self absorbed"_

Thought his father company was one of the most followed accounts on Instagram (and there were a few pictures of him on there)

He went to Facebook first and created a profile, adding Nino first so he could go through his friends and find something interesting.

He found almost every single classmate, except from Alya who wasn't friends with Nino (they probably deleted each other after the break up) and no sign of Marinette.

He sighed disappointed, but since he was already on it he decided to go through some of his old friends.

He found out that Kim was traveling the world making a TV show called "Extreme Bets". He laughed, he couldn't expect any less.

Juleka was a scientist doing an incredible research (Adrien didn't quite get what it was about) and she was still inseparable with Rose.

Sabrina wasn't friends with Chloé any longer and had moved to Hong Kong and married a big businessman there

When he clicked Nathanael his mouth opened in surprise.

He didn't paid much attention to the profile pic when it was tiny but now that it was a larger size he could see exactly who was beside him

Nathanël and Marinette smiled to the camera, faces close, Marinette's arm on his chest, and Nathanël's arm around her waist.

He kept scrolling to his profile to confirm (and re-confirm) that he and Marinette were an item.

Pictures of them kissing, paints of them made by Nathanël and many more were there, making a timeline of their relationship. They may had been dating for at least four years.

That made him upset and uncomfortable, and he couldn't explain why. Maybe his old crush on Mari was making a wild flash appearance.

"Woah, didn't he get akumatized because he liked her?" Plagg said coming out of the backpack

"Yeap" Adrien said in between a water mouth sound from his mouth (A.N: how do you call this?)

"Well it went well from him at the end, uh?

"Can't believe he had a crush on Mari for so long" But at the same time he totally understood why. At least with the Mari he knew, not this morning's Marinette. "C'mon, Plagg, back to the bag, I gotta go to my father's studio."

"Whyyy?" Plagg complained in a cry

"I told you this morning, I need new jackets for work, I would buy me anything but you know he will get angry if I don't wear something from his brand"

"Ugh… throw me tons of food, you are gonna take some time"

 **...**

He dropped by his father's main store, where his studio was. It was a big store in one of the most important streets of Paris, and upstairs were the offices and sewing rooms.

He met Nathalie first, with whom he had a nice chat. Since he stopped being a burden for her work they got along better than when he was a teen.

Then the longest part (and usually the tiring one) was when he finally met his father at his office. They were on better terms, going away and Adrien being more independent had been a good thing for both of them, but that didn't change the fact that Gabriel Agreste liked to control everything.

Adrien told him about his job, about the apartment, he mentioned going out with Chloé and told him a few stories to add more material to his weeks in Paris. Gabriel listened closely, interrupting only when necessary (which made Adrien very happy), he looked really invested on his son story and even asked a few questions that didn't judge any of Adrien's decisions.

They ate a few pastries and took tea together while listening to Gabriel's stories (all of them from work and upcoming fashion lines) but it turned to be really nice.

"Father I need to ask you a favor" Adrien said when he realized the conversation was dying

"What's wrong?" Gabriel asked

"Oh, no, nothing" Adrien shook his head in negative "I just need a few jackets for work and I thought you could recommend me a style or something" He giggled

"Oh, surely, I'm not with much time at the moment but I'm sure one of my interns can work something for you"

"Oh I don't want to bother them, they must be really busy. I only need you to point me out like three nice jackets"

"Are you insane, Adrien? I'll order them to design you something unique, if you are going to be a teacher instead of part of this empire at least I would like you to represent the label somehow, and this is the perfect opportunity"

Adrien bit his tongue to keep the words on his mouth, it didn't make any good if he refused, his father had already decided

"C'mon, follow me. This is good, I've wanted to introduce you to my interns"

"Why?" Adrien walked behind his father.

"It's a good thing" His father answered. Adrien couldn't see why, he wasn't involved not even a tiny bit in the company "This year I have a good group, very talented people"

"I'm glad, last year you were angry at the group you chose"

"They only wanted to please and make money, fashion is not about that" Adrien knew his answer was going to be something like it and smiled at it.

Gabriel and Adrien entered to the room where there were six desks and working spaces, they belonged to his six interns. Three girls, three guys, just like every year.

Two guys and a girl turned to them and made a line to welcoming them, almost like they were landing on the airport and were about to give them gifts.

"Good evening, designers" Gabriel said. Adrien had to keep it together, the thought of Tim Gunn saying that on Project Runway was too much for him.

"Good evening, Mr. Agreste"

"Where are the other three?" No names, of course.

"At the dying room" The girl with grey hair answered

"The three of them?" His father asked but didn't give them time to answer "Call them please, I want you to all meet my son"

The three of them smiled at him, Adrien waved.

"Mr. Agreste" A girl and a boy entered the room, their faces were painted in baby blue paint and light pink

"What is this mess" Gabriel asked mad but a second later he was smiling "Don't tell me, she has a new project"

"Yeah" They nodded

"Well, anyways. This is my son Adrien, I hope you all treat him well when he comes around, since he is an important part of this company" _Since when?_ Adrien thought "You have not only to impress me but also him"

"Of course, Mr. Agreste" They said in a chorus "Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Agreste"

"Oh, just Adrien" He giggled

"Mr. Agreste will do" Gabriel said and the designers agreed with him "Follow me, Adrien, I will introduce you to my last designer"

When they were out of the room and walking down the hallway, Gabriel spoke again

"She is the perfect option for your jackets. Such a talented girl, a little bit clumsy and always seems to be in other space, but surely one of the most brilliant designer I have seen in years"

If his father was talking like that about an intern, the girl probably was near perfection.

The dying room was one of those rooms that had always caught Adrien's attention. It was a little room with a few windows that let the natural light get in and also the room counted with two kinds of lighting, one was the normal kind of lamps and a blue/white lights that helped to see the pigments in the dark or worked for glow in the dark paints.

The last lights were the ones turned on and in the middle of the room there was a mannequin with what seemed to be a red carpet dress. The dress was black and in a fading effect in the middle it was blue and green. The dress was absolutely stunning, it was not finished that was obvious and it was still one of the most beautiful designs Adrien had seen.

"I'm I interrupting something, Donatella?"

"Please, sir, don't call me Donatella" A muffled voice came from behind the dress

"You said you wanted a designer name" Gabriel laughed.

Adrien turned to him so surprised that he really thought his eyes were about to go out of their orbit. He not only thought this girl was brilliant, he liked her, and he didn't really liked people.

"Come out, Miss, I have work for you" Gabriel said and changed the lighting for normal yellow lights

And the dress changed. It wasn't black anymore but white and the center red and pink

"Wow" Adrien gasped

"I told you she was brilliant" His father said to him, smiling.

"This is more than brilliant" Adrien replied.

"You like?" The girl came out of under the dress, she was obviously lying on the floor and the only thing visible was her face and hair. But that was enough for Adrien.

"Marinette, I would like you to meet my son, Adrien" Gabriel pointed at him "You are gonna design some stuff for him"

Marinette's mouth hanged open, and Adrien could feel the tension between them growing.

"I'm gonna leave you both so you can discuss about the designs. I'm sure both of you are gonna have a great time" Gabriel said

"Yeah, great" They said at the unison

"Perfect, I hope to see your designs on paper before you sew them, Marinette"

"Sure" Marinette said and when Gabriel left she sighed and rolled her eyes " _Fan-fucking-tastic_ "

Yeah, Adrien felt the same way.


	4. In Which There's A Vigilante

Marinette didn't say much after that, she just guided Adrien to her working space to start making measurements.

They were both in silence while Marinette rounded Adrien with her pink tape measure and scribbled into her notes.

The whispers of the other interns was the only noise on the room, till those whispers faded away and the interns were gone and the silence reigned again.

Adrien felt awkward and was still confused about the whole situation he was living. He didn't know what to do. He obviously had to ask Marinette what was going on, but he didn't know how, she was a different person or at least showed to be a different person, and Adrien didn't know how to deal with it.

While Marinette has measuring her waist, the tape snapped from her fingers and she had to start once again, making a new bad word come out of her mouth. And that made a light bulb light up on Adrien's brain.

"Have you ever been to America?" He asked looking directly at her eyes

Marinette paused all her work, she stood stiff and her breathe turned uneven, which made Adrien regret the question so he started speaking again

"I used to curse that much when I was in America, my first years and I realized that you curse like an American, I mean how you make the phrases and I, I'm sorry I asked I just wanted to know because I lived in America for long time and… sorry" He stopped and looked away from her blue eyes

"Let's say that I have but at the same time don't have been in America" Marinette answered, but really that didn't make any sense and only made Adrien more confused

"You are really confusing, Mari" He sighted

"Wow, there with the confidence, I don't think your father will like if you called me any other thing that Miss Dupaing-Cheng, at least Miss Marinette"

"Sorry, old habit" And there it was, subtle but effective

"Old habit?" Marinette looked at him, and took a step away "We know each other?!"

"Yeah, why did you think I asked you if you recognized me?" Adrien said back

"Because you were a public figure? I don't know... Oh, damn! You know me, we know each other!" Marinette walked in circles, her hands in the air and her face in shock "From where?"

"School, we were friends"

"We were friends?! Why didn't you said it earlier?!"

"Well you were being really mean and shouting at me"

"I didn't knew I knew you… and you didn't make any attempt to show me the contrary

"I was a little shocked myself, excuse me"

"Yeah but you didn't even called me by my name, that's how I usually guess people know me, you were a total stranger and oh god" Marinette kept rambling

"So you're not acting" Adrien said relieved

"No I'm not" She said as he had asked "I had… let's say an accident"

"I'm sorry, I didn't knew" _But I kinda had figured it out_ He thought. There was no way Marinette could have changed that much without any reasons

"God, I'm so sorry, I feel so bad. I'm not usually that mean but you just got in my freaking nerves for some reason, and I'm very impulsive after the whole thing, or so my family and friends say"

"It's okay, I think I should have been more direct when I realized something was wrong with you"

"Maybe you should have, but is still not okay from me to have treated you in the way I did, I'm just under a lot of stress and things are going on and I don't know, I'm sorry"

"Stop apologizing, is really fine" Adrien smiled to her and a strange sensation filled the room

Marinette seemed to feel it too but tried to ignore it. She felt too much since the weird "accident", and three weeks ago things started to be bolder than ever. Her emotions were all over the place, she was jumpy all the time and it was like every sound was louder, every color brighter and every sensation multiplied itself by ten.

Marinette stared at Adrien for long time before speaking again. He was handsome, so handsome and she had noticed that last night and this morning but somehow, now right in front of her he looked especially gorgeous. There was a fiery feeling on her tummy, as much as burning sensation all over her body and it performed to the public on the apples of her cheeks.

Adrien could see in front row how Marinette's cheeks started to stain in red, making him smile from an ear to another. That was Marinette, always burning in red and smiling shy

"I think we should finish with this" The girl said in a really low tone that Adrien wouldn't have heard if they weren't so close

"Can we finish the conversation first?"

"I had an accident; I lost my memory and I'm still trying to get it back. There's not much to talk about" Marinette huffed

"Yeah, but—

"Mari!" A shout at the door of the room made the girl turn around and smile

Adrien followed her sight and saw his old classmate and now Marinette's boyfriend on the door

"Hi" Marinette waved at him with a little smile

Nathanael walked to her workspace ignoring Adrien completely, he turned to Marinette and saluted her with a sweet little peck on the lips. Just then he turned to Adrien

"Long time no see" He smiled and extended his hand to the blonde

"Yeah, how is life going? A part of it pretty good as I can see" He didn't meant for it to sound full of jealousy, but it did, and Adrien was afraid that he could turn green right in the spot.

"Amazing" Nathanael's happiness was undeniable. He reached Marinette in a hug by her waist and kissed her temple "What brings you back to Paris?"

"Got a job at _Ecole Polytechnique ParisTech_ "

"Right, you are a teacher!" Nath said at the same time Marinette said "That's impressive, you must be so smart!"

"It's not a big deal" He said looking at Marinette, who finally acted like the girl he knew

"I would love to catch up but Mari and I have a date planned" Nath smiled.

Adrien couldn't help but hate every part of that phrase, and the way Nathanael said all of it. He was being nice and not faking a word or feeling that came out of his mouth, he was only that nice but for Adrien it felt like he was making fun of him. How ridiculous was that?

"Yeah, I have some errands myself" Lies, he swore he could hear Plagg laughing on his back.

"I'll have a few designs ready really soon" Marinette said "When can I show you?"

"Whenever, just knock on my door" Adrien smiled "Have fun guys"

"Sure" Marinette smiled awkwardly when Adrien turned around "I'll see you, I guess"

"I guess we'll do, neighbor " Adrien answered between a chuckle

By finally reaching the couch on his house, Adrien properly freaked out

"She had an accident! She got an accident and I didn't knew!" He yelled at Plagg "We were friends, I had a crush on her and I didn't knew a thing!"

"You moved an ocean away" Plagg said flying by his side

"Yeah but I kept contact with Nino and a few of my modeling friends, I could have kept contact with Marinette"

"Didn't the whole breakup of your best friends messed up that?"

"Yeah" Adrien nodded. Nino and Alya's break up had been awful, not because they hated each but all the contrary, the break up had ripped both of them apart, they didn't wanted to end things up but if they didn't none of them would have been successful. They had cut every cord that bonded them together, and that included Marinette and Adrien. Adrien didn't remember he agreed to that condition, it all seemed to have happened by itself.

"Well, now that I know and we cleared things up she was nicer" Adrien sighed and lied on his couch

"Yeah but there's still something weird about her"

"Wasn't you who this morning said she seemed the same?"

"I hadn't been around her for so long, there's a weird vibe around her, it kept me alarmed the whole time"

"She didn't alarmed you when she was rude but she did when she was being herself?"

"There's something fishy about her"

"Well as a cat you would know" Adrien grinned

"I can't believe I have been around you for ten years and you still impress me with horrible puns" Plagg said and ran to the kitchen

"It's a _tail_ ent" Adrien laughed and followed him "And talking about cats, we have job to do"

"Oh c'mon! I had to hide for an eternity and now you want to go and play around? I need a rest"

"You rested enough, I left you a whole bag of crackers and a round of cheese, you ate at all, I think you are fine"

"I have to differ"

"I differ back" Adrien smirked, put his hand on a fit and throw it on the air to what Plagg sighed "Plagg!

"Yeah, I know, I know, no need for the Sailor Moon scenario in your head"

"Transform me" Adrien ignored him and said the words.

When Adrien moved to Cambridge he didn't knew how much he would miss Paris, as in the city, how it was build, how it shined under the moonlight, how it became alive in such a different way when the sun went down. He didn't noticed how much he missed it till his second year of college, but tonight, this particular night when the drops of water were falling over Paris and the lights of the buildings seemed blurry thanks to it, when you can see tourist getting mad yet still having fun, when you can see citizens going out to bars and restaurants. The city was certainly beautiful, but in between all that beauty there was a part of it that refused to stay in peace.

Close to _Galeries Lafayette_ , in a street full of people, criminals were running. Pushing people away and hitting them to get away from police.

It had been ten minutes of persecution when in between the roofs and pipes a black and tall shadow was running to the scene.

Adrien felt how the adrenaline pumped through his veins, it had been way too long without feeling this kind of energy and the excitement of being a superhero was even bigger than when he was a teen. In those times it felt like a dream but also as a heavy weight to carry thanks to the _akumas_ , right now when he chose to do it, it felt amazing.

With help of his staff he had moved people out of the way from his place in the rooftop, making moves not to catch the criminals but to take them to an alley and trap them. While his plan was working perfectly, with the police helping and doing as he ordered (good thing that they still trusted him, there was a time when they would have doubt immediately) he didn't noticed the other figure running slower and with less precision trough the roofs.

The person was following him and a bit ahead of him since he still had to distract the criminals, yet this person was less skilled, maybe to the fact that she didn't own any super power at all, but to replace it, she was extremely smart. She realized the plan and localized the alley where the superhero was leading the criminals. In a fast move she changed directions, swiftly but carefully climbing trough the roofs, this night thanks to the rain she had to be especially cautious, one bad step and she will become a sticker on the ground.

She ended up in the scene first and hided on the shadows of the alley; when steps on the puddles made their recognizable noise, the shadow became alive and started fighting.

The element of surprise was her thing, no one expected to find an obstacle, not her that was for sure, tiny and skinny but when it came to fight hand to hand, she was impeccable.

Thanks to the unexpected stop of one of the criminals his buddy crashed against him, making it easier for the girl to kick them both to the wall. But that wasn't as effective as she thought, sadly the rain had made her slipper and her kick wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. The criminals jumped back and ran to the end of the alley.

The girl ran behind them to realize what they were doing. They had seen the same stair she had used to go down to the alley. While they ran stairs up, she jumped to grip the metallic bar above her so she could win time, not having to ran upstairs when the rain pouring down as it did.

She jumped, not quickly enough so the criminals were on rooftops already. If they were smart, they would chose the same path which would be nice for her, she already knew the easiest and safest paths on the roofs better than anyone in the whole city, rain or not she would win.

She stepped on the tiles of the roof and started running; in a shift move she flexed her knees and stopped running. Thanks to the rain she slide off and overtook the two thefts. She caught them by their hoodies, pulling back and down so they could stop.

But this time the element of surprise wasn't on her side. The tallest of the criminals had a knife and was aiming at her. The girl wasn't fast enough, the knife cut in to her thigh, which made her release them and loose the balance.

She hit the blue tiles with her body and slide down to the end of them. She tried to held up but the rain made everything slippery.

While she was falling she heard two loud howls, a laugh and a well known scream

" _Cataclysm!"_

Everything happened in less than a second but for her it was like a slow motion camera. One moment she was hearing all that noise and falling down the roof and the other she was stopped in the air, looking down at the cars and people who stared at her, and someone was holding her by her ankle.

She couldn't look up, she knew any move could make the person who was holding her lose the grip, and she didn't wanted to meet the ground face to face. But after she heard a deep rich laugh she was about to make him drop her.

She didn't knew why she felt like that, the necessity to roll her eyes to the guy who was holding her, but she did, so she spoke

"Are you gonna put me down?"

"Alright" He said and the grip was gone

She shouted when she started falling again, moving her arms and legs trying to make the fall less fast, but she knew it was useless.

She closed her eyes, ready to find her fatal destiny when once again everything stopped. She was in a guys arms, and he was running like she weighted the same as a feather.

"You almost kill me! Damn I thought I was having a heart attack!" He laughed again and stopped in the flattest roof he found.

Chat put her down and stepped away from her, giving her space to breathe

"I'm sorry, princess" He said making something click inside the girl's brain "But you shouldn't been playing superhero, it's dangerous" That he said it with seriousness and a frowned expression

"Superheroes hadn't been here for long, somebody had to do something"

"Sure, but it's no work for a princess like you. Being totally serious, Marinette, what were you thinking?"

Marinette blinked and opened her mouth in surprise

"You know who I am?"

"Of course, the mask doesn't do much, it's not magical like mine, and I would recognize my princess anywhere" He smirked

"We know each other?"

"Let's say that you were an incredible ally back in the day, thought I say you have gone way too far now. Police saw you in the shadows and called me to warn me about you. They think you are… reckless and mess up a lot of operations"

"What?! I have captured more criminals in these three months than they have in a lifetime"

"No one likes a vigilante, princess" He crossed his arms on his chest and walked to her "What's with you? What motivated you all of a sudden?"

"You ask with such confidence, really how did this conversation start? it shouldn't been taking place, thank you for saving me but I'm alright"

"We have tons of confidence, princess, we are very good friends"

"We are?" Marinette gasped, trying to connect pieces of the puzzle on her head, but it was useless.

"Yes, and we can still be if you want" Chat extended his hand to her face, making Marinette flinch "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have tried to touch you without permission, I know this must be weird for you… I heard about your accident"

"You did?" She asked surprised. Details of her "accident" weren't out there so that made her suspicious "What did you heard?"

"Nothing more than you had an accident and lost your memory" He upped his shoulders "It must be hard to be through that…why risk it trying to be Paris' Daredevil?"

"I don't have to explain anything to you" She huffed and putted her hands on her waist

"You don't" He nodded "C'mon if I'm not getting any answers from you tonight, at least let me take you home"

"What? No, what happened with the thefts?"

"Ah, the police must be scrabbling between the rubble to find them"

"You destroyed a building?!" Marinette gasped

"Only a little wall, everything will be okay when—" He stopped, eyes wide open in realization "Oh, _purrfect_ " He said, clearly stating that nothing was

"What? You didn't knew that destroying things was bad?"

"Is not about my powers" He sighed "I just never had fought without my Lady, she used to fix everything at the end"

"Oh, I'm sorry" Marinette felt the need to apologize, the sadness that Chat irradiated was palpable "Where's she?"

"If I only knew" He laughed ironically "I'm looking for her, we haven't been in contact for a few years now"

Marinette didn't knew how to answer so she kept her mouth shut.

She took off her black mask and took off her tall pony tail, letting her long black her fall to her shoulders. Thanks to the rain it was heavier than usual and it tangled easier so she started brushing it with her fingers.

"You look really good with your hair down" She looked up. Chat was looking at her and she wasn't sure, but it seemed like he was blushing. The rain dripping on his blonde hair and the teardrops making his way down along the sharp line of his jaw, made a strangely familiar and overwhelming feeling take over Marinette. She couldn't explain what it was, she knew a part of her was admiring how handsome the guy was under the mask but there was so much more that it wasn't possible to describe. There was a feeling similar to what Alya gave her but also the weird awkward and unsettling feeling that Adrien gave her was there, thought it was almost nonexistent compared to the blonde model.

"Princess is everything fine?" One blink and he was closer, his hands on her shoulders, gently rubbing her, as he was calming her down. He was tall so he was looking down to her, but instead of feeling terrified, Marinette felt so safe and warm being this close to him. Which obviously, made her blush, and Chat noticed "You still blush, I like that too"

"Stop" She ordered in between a laugh "Or I won't take your offer to take me home"

"Why would that be bad for me?" He lifted a brow

"Something tells me you won't leave me alone till I accept it"

"Something tells me that there's a part of you who remembers me perfectly" He took her hand, pulling her closer "C'mon, purrinces, it's time to go home"


	5. In Which There's Nothing New

Adrien couldn't stop thinking about Marinette. That wasn't new.

She had been stuck inside his mind for two weeks already, since their first encounter, to the revelation of her amnesia and then meeting her as Chat and finding out that Marinette, his old friend and crush, was Paris' hated and loved vigilante.

Half of people who didn't like her thought she was trying to replace Ladybug and Chat, hardcore fans that still couldn't let go that their heroes were gone. The other half who hated her, had hated the Miraculous duo in their time too.

Adrien didn't belong to the hate group, but he wasn't loving the whole vigilante thing, not for Mari, that's for sure. She seemed to be tough, tougher than the Marinette he knew before, but she was still clumsy Marinette. Two weeks being his neighbor had been enough for him to know that in a lot of aspects she was still old sweet Marinette.

They had been talking about the designs of his jacket, all very polite but awkward, Adrien couldn't stop thinking that this was worse than when Marinette couldn't speak properly to him. Marinette was polite, but she was mean at times, she was jumpy and gave the impression that she wanted to be the far away from him.

He could see how the girl tried to be nice but it didn't worked, which made Adrien really sad, because even if this wasn't the sweet girl he was used to, he still had a little crush on her. It was impossible to ignore how beautiful she was, how red lipstick looked perfect on her, how all her clothes fitted her body perfectly (becoming a big distraction for Adrien) how her hair looked gorgeous when it was down; And how her big bluebell eyes still made him swoon.

He had a type, he had realized time ago, and every time he found himself swooning over Marinette's physically beauty, he couldn't stop himself of thinking of Ladybug, and then everything turned to hell.

Adrien was exhausted, he had been patrolling daily and there was still no sign of Ladybug. He had answered a few questions to reporters, hoping Ladybug would see it on TV, he had made very clear that he wanted to see her again. But nothing had happened, Ladybug was nowhere to be found.

Adrien was so desperate to find something that he had tried to contact Master Fu, just to find that he had passed away a few years ago and that his kwami and the other Miraculous had been handled to a new guardian. The latest information was provided by Plagg.

"How didn't you tell me this before?"

"I don't know, I'm sorry, I should have been able to feel it before we visited, but something is off" Plagg gasped "Look I didn't wanted to scare you but a few years ago I had a strange feeling and things have been weird since then"

"What? A few years ago?" Adrien blinked "Plagg, you can trust me"

"I know, you little nerd, but you were so down that Ladybug stopped texting that I didn't wanted to worry you"

"Worry me…. It was around the time she stopped being around?"

"Yes, something happened, an unusual change of energy and since then I have been having trouble to sense other kwamis"

"Plagg that is important!" Adrien stood up from his seat, accidentally throwing all his students papers to the floor

"I know!" Plagg said "But is not a miraculous holder issue, is kwami issue. I didn't tell you because you were having a great time in the states, you were sad because of Ladybug but at the same time you were living for the first time. As your kwami and protector of the miraculous I know that a guardian works better and it's stronger when they are happy, and you stop being in the border of depression was a thing that would be good for the future if we ever had to fight another evil force in the future. So I chose the smarter option"

"But you can't feel kwamis, that's dangerous"

"Look, I got my theories, kiddo. I was always close to Tikki, I mean, Ladybug's kwmai. No matter the city, culture or century, we were always close, closer than any other guardian was, so maybe moving to the states changed something in our dynamic."

"Are you sure?" Adrien looked at him

"I'm not sure, but I have felt energies since we moved back here, so I guess that's good"

"Mhhm" Adrien sat again and started to pick up all the messy papers "You are supposed to tell me things like this"

"If it's really necessary I will, I promise" Plagg nodded and Adrien smiled

Over the years the relationship Adrien and Plagg shared had grown and changed a lot. They had always been close but as Adrien was more mature and independent, Plagg seemed to adapt with him, he was still the annoying and sometimes rude kwami Adrien knew, but he also had serious moments when he and Adrien talked like they were both adults, because didn't matter how old Plagg was, Adrien still believed he was twelve years old.

Five minutes later, while Adrien decided that the coffee was too cold to drink, he stopped revising papers and he called Plagg.

"Time to patrol" He said smiling

"Time to see your girlfriend, you mean" Plagg give a swing to the door

"It's the only moment when she is comfortable around me, so Plagg, _transforme moi_ " Adrien didn't try do deny that he wanted to see the cute vigilante. While his priority was to find Ladybug, he wasn't having much response or had find any clues that could bring him to her; but while that was depressing, the nights were brighter when he ran into Marinette.

She wasn't hard to spot, not everyone was jumping and running through Paris rooftops in a costume, well, besides him. But she sure was the cutest one on the rooftop, and that was hard to miss.

Today he found her at Champs Elysée. She was wearing her all black costume, that he was sure she had designer herself. It wasn't normal thighs and a hoodie, it was a costume that seemed to be part of a superhero movie. A black mask that covered her eyes and half of her nose, long spandex leggings with black boots, a sports bra that peeked through the long sleeved sweater she was wearing, that was the most aerodynamic sweater Adrien had ever seen. Also it was the cutest superhero outfit he had seen in her, probably because tonight was warmer than the nights before, on those nights, Marinette was wearing a thick long sleeved shirt that was almost like second skin.

"Night, princess" Chat said when he landed on the closest rooftop.

"God damn" Marinette jumped scared, losing her balance which made her agitate her arms in all directions to not fall.

Adrien was more than ready for that reaction; he caught her in his arms and smirked at her when she found his sight

"Why do you have to do that every time?" Marinette said out of breathe

"Because you jump and I get to catch you every time" He smirked "You look lovely tonight, Mari"

"What's new?" She smirked back, making Adrien laugh in response "It's been a quiet night, at least on this district, I'm not as fast as you and sometimes I can't figure it out the whole police code"

Marinette pointed at her ear where she had a small headphone; nights ago she had explained him that she listened to the police so she could go and help.

Chat had pointed out how that seemed to be out of and American superhero movie, which had made Marinette flinch. He had realized very fast that America was a subject that made the girl nervous; why? He still had to discover that

"Helped a kid who almost falls from the Arc de Triomphe but nothing scandalous, _Daredevil._ Go back home, watch some movies, eat chocolate, call your friends and swoon over me"

"Ha! You wish I did, _chaton_ "

"What is there another man in your life besides me? Well, that in fact is scandalous, considering all the nights you have spent with me" Adrien knew there was someone else. Nathanël had visited Marinette almost every day the past two weeks. If someone was the other man, it was obviously Chat.

"I don't want to break your heart, but your princess has a prince" Marinette answered. Thought the phrase meant to be sassy, it ended up as factual. No happiness, sadness or excitement, it was just a fact.

"Princes are boring, you'll figure it out what a princess really needs is a knight" Chat winked

He wasn't sure what he expected but it wasn't silence or the look on Marinette's face as she watched a point in the distance

"Marinette, are you okay?" Chat took a step forward, ready to took one backwards if Marinette didn't felt comfortable with him close. Thankfully that wasn't the case, Marinette let him in on her space, a thing that she hadn't let much people do since the "accident"

"Things are getting a little messy in my life" Marinette gasped "Things have been messy since the "accident" but a few months ago things changed, I don't know what it is, or how to describe it, it's like a change of energy, those are the only words I find appropriate but still they are not enough"

"Why do you always do the quotation marks with your fingers when you say accident? Not saying it isn't cute but—I wonder why"

"Because that is other thing I don't know how to explain" She answered, she sounded exhausted. "I wake up one day with a horrible headache, and I look at white walls and there are tubes and needles on my arms. I see a woman sitting on the chair next to me, I don't know who she is but I have this weird sensation in me, she irradiates comfort and love and somehow I know she is my mother. I don't know her but I _feel_ that she is my mother. And then it happens with more people, all happy to see me and I feel, so intensely I feel how everyone in the room loves me and care about me and yet I have no idea who they are"

Adrien crossed his arms around Marinette and she held tight. She didn't knew why she was allowing him to do it but she didn't wanted him to stop, and the feelings grew stronger, Marinette felt that if there was a moment to talk about secrets, this was it, and him was the person who she felt comfortable enough to do it. Why so quickly? Why him? No rational answer, just feelings

"I feel things, not only my own feelings, I feel others people's feelings and I… I feel the world? I feel how things move, how they change, like an energy surrounds me and how colors change around me and everything has a meaning, I don't know what is the meaning but I know there's one. I'm an open wire. I have been since the "accident", a thing that I'm not even sure it was an accident, I only call it that because my therapist suggested"

Marinette didn't realize she was crying till Chat took of her mask and started to clear the tears away.

"Is okay, princess, is okay" He whispered as he held her close.

Marinette let all the stress of the last four months while crying in his arms. She didn't said more and Chat didn't wanted her to, she clearly wasn't ready for it, but what she had said was enough for a night and Adrien was happy that he had that piece of information.

Chat only stopped hugging her when she asked to. Marinette cleaned her tears and put her mask back on. They had moved to the shadows of the building to keep hidden so putting the mask back on wasn't necessary but Marinette felt less vulnerable when she wore it.

"Sorry for crying all over your super-suit" She sobbed

"Don't you worry, is water resistant" He smiled and shook her hair with his hand "I think is time for me to go home, I have a busy day tomorrow. Take you home?"

"Please" She nodded and in less than a second she was in Chat's arms once again

Chat left her in her apartment and came back to his, to just stare at the city once again, he closed his eyes and imagined a girl.

He sighed, Adrien didn't know what was going on in his life. That wasn't new.

Marinette didn't know what the hell was going on in her life. That wasn't new.

Since the day Marinette had opened her eyes and found herself in a hospital room with no memory of anything, she knew things were going to be a problem.

Not recognizing your family or your best friend is one big major problem and it was presented to her in day one.

When her mother saw her open her eyes, she talked to her, she hugged her and she was the most lovable mother a daughter could ask for. Her father was as sweet if not more. And Marinette wasn't able to be sweet back, no more than a second after their parents were hugging each other and at the border of tears, Marinette had spilled the truth

"I'm really sorry about this but… I…. you are my parents right?"

Her dad called the doctor, the doctor made questions, Marinette gave answers and it was settled that she had amnesia. Not less than three hours later, while Marinette was still trying to assimilate what was going on, her parents brought a redhead girl to her room. She was in tears and she was holding a shoe box decorated in what seemed to be a ladybug pattern.

She had introduced herself as Alya, apparently she was her best friend. And she had bought photos, letters, gifts, and everything she thought could help Marinette. Her parents also gave her family albums and played old VHS tapes for her so she could remember things

But Marinette wasn't focused on it, she couldn't see the faces in the pictures, she couldn't read the words on the paper and she couldn't hear the voices on the tapes because their feelings were too loud.

Marinette felt like she was about to explode. Sadness and confusing feelings were surrounding her and it was like she was getting electrocuted every time she tried to not focus on it. She felt everything that was around her like it was moving only for her to watch. But everything was worse when she tried to connect the dots, or better said, find the dots, she needed to find the dots first.

Because the dots she thought she had were apparently, only dreams. She didn't know why but she was sure she lived in the United States, or at least was studying there; she was sure she had a black cat, she was sure she hated cheese, and she was damn sure she knew astrophysics.

But she didn't.

Her parents told her she had never left France, that the closest to a pet she had was fish (that had died in suspicious circumstances) and that she in fact adored everything made with cheese in the bakery. Also Alya had assured her that she was a complete disaster in physics, that her talent was the arts.

So Marinette came back to square one.

After a week she was released from the hospital, and the feelings were louder. Her parents protected her more than ever (wait she couldn't know that, but somehow she felt that it was like that) Alya came by every day and told her stories about their years of school and showed her more and more pictures.

It was like that for weeks till Marinette couldn't handle it anymore. The more she pushed herself to remember, the bolder the world was and the feelings around her turned too heavy for her to handle.

So she decided to stop it all. She changed her room completely, she asked for her parents to let her be and to stop with the family albums, she gave Alya all her things back and asked her to stop about the stories of school.

It was easier for her like that. She knew it was a big disappointment for Alya and her parents but she was the one trying to recover so she was gonna do it her way.

And it worked, the less she pushed herself, the more she remembered.

The first memories to come back were the little ones, like knowing which one was her father's favorite meal and her mother's favorite movie. Knowing that Alya loved superheroes and journaling so much that she made a notebook with a cover of a superheroes collage.

And then she started to remember the things she liked. She loved to design, she loved pink, and she liked vanilla ice cream and strawberries.

Things were going good, and they were easy. A few times she crossed roads with someone and she had to explain that she had been in an accident so she didn't remember them, but Marinette _felt_ them. She knew when she liked someone or when someone made her uncomfortable, and she was damn sure when she hated someone, like the mayor's daughter. Chloé had acknowledged her and had made a mean joke, and Marinette confirmed that the disgusting feeling was perfect for the girl.

It took six months for Marinette to say that she remembered every memory with her parents (or at least enough to say so) and it took two more for Marinette to remember Alya, to run to her house and hug her with all the love she had, because finally she felt like her best friend and not like she was pretending to be her best friend.

She started studying at the Fashion Institute, just a year later of what she had planned and took some extracurricular classes since she couldn't only relay in muscle memory.

A few of those classes were shared with art students and then she saw him and she remembered him immediately. And the feelings were calm and nice, and she felt love.

For the first time in a year she wasn't uncomfortable around someone, so when Nathanël asked her out she said yes in a heartbeat.

Marinette closed her eyes at the memory. Things were a mess, especially after these two weeks.

Marinette couldn't stop thinking about Chat Noir. That wasn't new.


	6. In Which True Love Never Fades

Adrien knew that what he was doing was wrong.

He didn't like when his dad called him and made plans with him only to ask for a favor, and here he was calling him to ask him if he was free today. He knew he probably would say no, so he was going to suggest passing by the office quickly, then he would say yes and Adrien's plan would end in success. Because the plan was all about going to the studios and see Marinette, without having to go to Marinette, it would all look casual and as a coincidence.

Last night Marinette had give Adrien, no, Chat, she had give answers to Chat Noir. She had open a part of her heart and shared feelings and memories with him, explaining a bit of what had happened to her, but not enough to figure it out the whole picture.

Adrien didn't want to see her to ask more questions or catch more clues, but he wanted to know if she was okay, because they hadn't crossed paths this morning. Adrien was a 110% percent sure that Marinette had changed her schedule to not meet Adrien at the stairs in the morning, or evening, or any other hour of the day.

In the middle of the second call, while the annoying beeping sound of the phone was making Adrien more and more anxious, a ring on his door made him hang.

He huffed, throwing the phone to the closest sofa. He made a sign to Plagg who was flying close to the refrigerator, at the sight of the sign, Plagg went to hide.

Adrien opened the door and his bad disposition went away

"No fucking way!" Adrien shouted. Well, it has been a while since he dropped the f-bomb but this situation deserved

"Yes fucking way!" Nino was in the front door laughing.

The friends leaned into a hug, both of them laughing.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were working on something new, and you were about to travel to that fancy festival!" Adrien said excited, making his way into his apartment, with Nino following

"I needed a change of airs, LA is not as funny as it was at the beginning, and let's be honest I have been homesick for years now. I'm gonna rent a studio here and do my thing" Nino sat on the couch and gave a sight to the living room "Nice room, dude"

"It is, isn't it?" Adrien said smiling.

"It has your vibe, which is why is so perfect for you, after years of extravagant things, kiddo finally gets what he wants, uh?" Nino smiled to him, and gave three pats on his shoulder

"Yeah, things have been nice" Adrien sighed. Almost everything was nice, there was still the Marinette problem, and of course, not a word or sight of his Lady.

"I thought you were going to be at work, good thing I gave it a shot"

"I don't give any class on Wednesdays" Adrien explained "Good thing because Tuesdays are a mess, I barely have time to catch my breath"

"I feel ya, last months have been exhausting. Let me tell ya about this whole PR stunt of my relationship" Nino said

"Oh yeah, Ashley is it?"

"Yeah, damn that girl is annoying" Nino put his hands on his head and pulled his hair "I don't know why I keep accepting this things, better said how my manager keeps convincing me to do this?"

"I don't know, I wonder that too" Adrien laughed "But she was nice, at least when I met her"

"She is nice, but she is clingy and I don't think she gets the whole point of a PR stunt" Nino sighed "Anyways no more ranting about my fake relationships when we can talk about yours"

"Mine? What are you talking about?"

"I'm joking… no maybe not, I was really hoping you were chasing after Marinette"

"Nino, she barely looks at me in the eye, and she is all awkward when I'm around"

"Sound like good old Mari to me" Nino laughed "Did you found out what was wrong with her?"

"She got in an accident, lost her memory; she didn't know who I was because of that, and apparently she is very impulsive now and she had a bad feeling about me or something like that. She is designing a few jackets for me—oh yeah she works for my father, and well every time I try to talk to her she gets all nervous and sometimes she is mean.. is like our first year of school together but instead of her stuttering, she is mean to me"

"That sucks. But she is your neighbor, have you tried to talk to her when she is not at work or you have been too afraid to knock on her door?"

"You didn't see all her rage when we first met, I mean met again for the first time?" Adrien recalled the memory, still very vivid in his head "It was a completely different Marinette"

"Well, we all change and if she was in an accident that made her lost her memory, I wouldn't expect any less" Nino said but it didn't seem to have any effect on Adrien.

Marinette was still old Marinette and at the same time a new Marinette, he knew that as Chat. They had conversations on rooftops, at her window when he dropped her home, and when they had fought a few thefts together. All of those times helped him see how Marinette was and wasn't the girl he knew, all at the same time. But he didn't want to know that as Chat, he wanted to know that as Adrien.

"Oh, I see the problem" Nino giggled "Your "little" crush is back"

"Shut up" Adrien pushed him by his shoulder

"Adrien likes Marinette _again_ " Nino singed "You are blushing! Oh, your crush is baaack"

"I said shut up" Adrien frowned but couldn't keep the serious face for long "If you saw her again you will be blushing too"

"I got Nath on Facebook, I know how she looks like"

"Oh" Adrien said surprised. So Nino knew that Marinette was dating their old classmate "Well, then you know she is still very pretty"

"You did not only like Marinette because she was pretty" Nino said

"I know, but right now my crush is only revolving around that, we barely talk" He lied, they had talked a lot, but he couldn't tell Nino that he was Chat Noir

"So you admit you have a crush? Interesting" The DJ laughed "I think you should try to speak to her, she is your neighbor and she works for your dad, is not like you don't know where to find her"

"I was thinking in passing by the offices and workshop today… In fact I was calling my dad!"

Adrien ran to the sofa where his phone was and saw on the screen two messages from his dad

 **DAD: Something wrong?**

"Why does he always think something is wrong?" Adrien sighed and touched his forehead

"What do I know? Your old man's mind works in ways that I will never be able to understand"

"Yeah" Adrien nodded "I'm gonna call him again, want to come with me to the office?"

"Yeah, let's see if your father has finally accepted me" Nino grinned

"Hey, he is better now but let's not ask for miracles here" Adrien laughed and called his father.

"Adrien" He picked up really quickly which was surprising

"Hi, father. Are you busy?"

"Yeah, supervising the interns photo-shoot" He said

"You are what?" Adrien asked surprised. He never did that, he always called Nathalie for information

"Supervising the photo-shoot, you know how Vogue likes to show the three best of my interns in the December edition" Yeah, Adrien knew but it still didn't make sense him being there. He only went for longer than an hour if he really liked a designer's work.

"It's my free day, it would be okay if I go?" Adrien asked, something had clicked and he wasn't missing this opportunity

"It would be fantastic, Adrien, it's nice to hear you have a little bit of interest in my label." Gabriel said pleased "We are at Trocadero"

"Perfect, I'm bringingNinoiwillseeyouthere" He hanged

"Yeah, because talking fast makes things better" Nino shook his head in amusement

"I told him, if he didn't get it is his fault" Adrien laughed "C'mon, let's go see Mari"

"Do you think she remembers me?"

"Let's hope she doesn't"

"That's mean, dude"

Yeah, but if Nino was still in Marinette's memory, Adrien was not going to take it well.

 **...**

Nino and Adrien made it to Trocadero. They joked around, catch up a bit on their lives, Adrien heard him rant more about his fake girlfriend and Nino teased Adrien with Marinette. It was like the old days all over again.

Both of them had lived in USA but while Nino lived in LA, Adrien was at the other side of the country in Cambridge. They were still best friends and saw each other more than any other friend but it was nice to know that they were going to be in the same city. The chances to hang out were multiplied by a thousand and that was something that the both of them needed.

Adrien still had his friends from college, who texted and called him once in a while, and he had gone for coffee the other day with Fleur and Greg, two old friends from the model gigs. But Nino still was the first person he called when something big happened and the best friend he wished was closer, and now he was.

They stopped talking only to answer to the security guards who didn't let them go closer to the tends that were obviously of the photoshoot. Adrien only had to show his ID for the guards to change their attitude and let them in.

Adrien saw his father and walked in that direction. He said hi to a photographer he knew and to a few of assistants of the company. Other people said hi to them, and freaked out because of Nino. One of the models came running with a napkin from the food table for him to sing, which made Adrien laugh. Nino hated to give me autographs, it was part of the job but he hate it as much as Adrien used to hate it.

The photographers were working with one of the boys Adrien had seen at the workspace a few weeks ago. He was tall and very skinny, his hair was long and curly and it was dyed in a bright red, which made him stand out more than needed.

The piece they were shooting was a long leather dress with touches of silver and gold, it gave the impression of a knight armor but delicate and light at the same time. Adrien knew that was really hard to do, leather didn't look delicate without any effort. And the model dressed it well too, that was important as well.

"Father!" Adrien exclaimed when they were closer

"Not now, Adrien" Was his reply.

Adrien frowned in confusion and stepped closer to understand what was going on. And there she was, the reason why he was there.

"Maybe I can sew the back of the jacket and—

"No, it will ruin the shape" Gabriel answered "Let me think"

"This is a nightmare" Marinette look like she was about to explode, her eyes were wide open and teary, she was biting her lips nervously and she curled her hands repeatedly

"What's wrong?" Adrien asked

"C'mon, let see the jacket again" Gabriel said to Marinette, both of them ignoring Adrien and leaving there standing

"Wow, I have never seen Mari so stressed before" Nino said.

"Yeah, me neither, if they could only tell me what's going on" He sighed

"Let's go with them, we'll get the information we need and you can start flirting" Nino said in a laugh.

But before they could start walking someone pushed them away

"Let me pass, let me pass" The girl ran and stopped in front of Marinette "Girl, I got your tea and my assistant is on his way to the fabric store, you just tell and we get you what you need"

"Is that…" Nino whispered, his eyes on the girl in front of Marinette

"Are you okay?" Adrien asked, and he was ignored once again but this time by his best friend. It was to expect, Nino never got over Alya and now there she was, in front of him after six years.

Nino started walking in the girls' direction; Adrien knew he was doing it without realizing it, because his eyes were only on the beautiful girl with the red hair styled in a cute ponytail that Adrien knew took long minutes and skilled hands to style.

"Mr. Agreste will come out with something, don't worry, Mari"

"I should come out with something, is my design" Marinette shouted back "I can't believe this is happening!"

"Try to take deep breathes, don't freak out and you will come out with something"

Nino and Adrien were beside the girls, but they were so involved in their own world that they didn't look at them.

Nino apparently was still in shock, because there was no way he could keep his mouth shout for so long and Adrien really wanted to know what was wrong with Marinette, so he spoke

"What's wrong with your designs?" He said, making the two girls turn their heads to him

And again they ignored him

"Nino?" Alya and Marinette said at the unison

So Marinette remembered Nino, great, just great. Why was him so forgettable?

"Hi-hi girls" Nino said and waved awkwardly

"What are you doing here? I thought you were in a festival" Alya said, her confidence irradiating from her voice as it always had but her eyes showed all the nervousness that was hidden inside her.

"I needed a break, new air, I'm back here in Paris… I thought you were travelling around Asia?" He said

"You keep tabs on me?" Alya lifted a brow and a quirky smile appeared on her lips

"Well what can I say? I enjoy good journalism" He answered smiling "And apparently you also keep tabs on me"

"I gotta stay informed, you know, to write good articles" Alya huffed

"Sure" Marinette whispered, surely it wasn't meant to be heard by anyone but Adrien did and laughed at it

"Oh, look at me being all rude" Alya said and opened her arms "Hello there, Agreste"

"Hello there, Césaire" He said back and found her in a hug "Hey you grew"

"Nah, Mari only lent me a pair of heels" Alya pointed at her shoes. Then something sparked in Alya's eyes and turned to Marinette "Need help?"

"No, I know the essentials" Marinette nodded "Hi, guys"

"Mari!" Nino exclaimed, finally acknowledging her "My boy told me about that "accident", so is there anything you need to ask? Because I'm all here for you girl"

Marinette laughed and Adrien felt betrayed. Why did she act so nicely around Nino? It wasn't fair.

"As I said to Alya, I know the essentials and if you stay around my memory will do the rest for me" She answered

"Cool" Nino hugged her by her shoulders and Marinette crossed an arm on his back "So what's the drama here?"

"Mari's stupid male model can't make it" Alya explained and leaned closer to Nino, which made Nino lean closer to her.

"You can't use any other model?" Nino asked

"They don't fit in the outfits or they are not the aesthetic Marinette is trying to portrait" Adrien answered, three pair of eyes looked at him surprised "I mean, I suppose is that… right?"

"Yeah, both of those things; your father said we could work out the aesthetic with one of Sébastien's models but they are too skinny for my designs and Marceline's models are too bulky" Marinette sighed "It's a mess"

"Can I see the designs?" Adrien asked "Maybe I can help, I haven't been around this world for a while but I did learn a lot as a teen"

Adrien was expecting for Marinette to reject the idea, but she nodded and guided him to her workspace inside of the tent. Adrien looked back to seek for Nino's support but he was too busy talking with Alya to remember him. But that was good too; it was nice to see Nino happy, especially if it was the true love kind of happiness; because that was what Alya was to him.

He focused once again on Marinette, which wasn't a hard thing to do. She looked stunning today, she was wearing maroon high waisted trousers and a white crop top with a turtle neck, her hair was in a fancy braid which made her look younger and her lips once again were covered in red lipstick.

 _Why is she so pretty?_ That was a question that Adrien would never be able to answer.

"So these are the jackets and the shirts, I have these black pants I designed and this green trousers, none of them fit perfectly, I can work with that, but the jackets are the problem because—

"Because of the tailoring" He finished "It's a time problem then… because you could fix this

"Yeah but the photoshoot is now and I need more time and more fabric if I want to do it right, I mean at the end is designing a completely new jacket"

Adrien took a closer look at the jackets, one of them being familiar.

"Is this one the jacket design you did for me?" He asked. The jacket was simple and yet unique, it was perfect for work and for the runway, and it made a guy look elegant and put together. He knew that's how the jacket was going to look like when she showed him the designs but now in a hanger it was so much more, it was absolutely perfect.

"Yeah… you don't mind, right? Because after all is my design and well your father liked it very much so he suggested to be on the photoshoot, and I accepted because I like it too, it's one of the best things I have done, obviously it had to be because it was for you and—" Marinette shouted her mouth. She was blushing and looking to the ground

Adrien couldn't be happier. Okay she did recognize Nino, that was sad, but now, right there, that was his old friend and that was something.

"It's fine, I love them" Adrien assure her "You made them based on my measures?"

"Yes, the design is your jacket…as I said" Marinette said low

In a swift move, Adrien took off his navy blue sweater and tossed it to the ground so he could take the jacket out of the hanger and put it on.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Marinette shouted scared

Adrien buttoned up the jacket and walked to the closest mirror. He smiled when he saw the jacket fitted him like a glove

"Don't I look handsome, Mari?" He winked at her and her cheeks turned a brighter red than they were.

"I-its looks good, I think" Marinette crossed her arms on her chest and rolled her eyes. "Take it off now, I don't want to mess it up"

"Yeah, you are right, better after makeup and hair" Adrien said and took the jacket off, handling it to Marinette

"What are you talking about?" Marinette asked confused but Adrien ignored her. She took Mari's hand and walked her to the end of the tent, where his father was making calls

"Dad" Adrien said

"I'm busy, Adrien, I need to find a model for Marinette" He said and turn the chair to not see him

 _He really likes her, he would never do this if he didn't really admired her._

"I found a model" Adrien said

"What?" Marinette asked and at the same time Gabriel stood up of his chair

"How did you found a model? One of your old friends is willing to take the job in such short notice?"

"Well, yeah—

"What if it doesn't fit with the measures we need, Adrien? Did you thought about—

"Father" Adrien cut "The jacket was designed for me, so I obviously fit. So, you got a model, Marinette can show her designs and you two don't have to pull your hair out"

Marinette and Gabriel opened their mouths in surprise

"You want to model?" Gabriel asked skeptical

"It's a beautiful jacket, I'm not gonna let anyone else wear it, I'm a jealous guy" Adrien said, no answer was gonna be enough for his father, so whatever, he was going to make a joke out of it.

Gabriel looked at his son, then at his hand holding Marinette's and finally to the designer's confused eyes.

"Alright, Marinette take him to makeup and let's get over with this"

 **...**

Marinette couldn't believe what was happening.

She had treated Adrien so wrong and had been so awkward around him this whole time, and there he was, getting ready to shoot, and he was doing it for her. Were they really that close before? They had to be, because, according to Gabriel, his son hated to model or anything that was tied to the Agreste brand because his teaching job required a level of respect that, according to Adrien, vanished if he was a model. But now he was about do it, he walked in the middle of the set, smiling as the makeup artist ended his job (not that he needed much, the guy was practically perfect) not a sign of him hating what he was about to do.

She didn't remember a thing about Adrien, and she had been tempted multiple times to flip through her yearbooks or pictures, but at the same she knew it wouldn't work, it just never did, and she wasn't about to push herself for Adrien, no matter how much she wanted.

She had told Alya about the first encounter with Adrien, but Alya didn't said much about it, but after Marinette found out that they were friends, Alya did spoke, or at least as much as Marinette let her.

 _"_ _Yes, we were all friends in school. He was new the same year as I was, he was really nice. He is Nino's best friend"_

And then Marinette shut her up, if Adrien was Nino's best friend, then Alya knew a lot about him, and probably Marinette did too, and it was for the best if she started to remember without her help. The only person she had a lot of information, but still didn't quite remember, was Nino, because Alya talked about him in daily basics. She was still totally in love with her ex, no matter how many dates or how many times she had been in a relationship, it always ended in Nino, and Marinette had to hear all about him. It was worse when Alya founded an article about him, and one of his multiple girlfriends, then it was all madness, sadness and Alya saying " _why am I doing this? I'm over him, nothing is gonna happen, we haven't spoke in years, this is ridiculous"_

So by consequence, Marinette knew a lot about Nino. And now meeting him, he gave her a good feeling, and she reacted even better when she felt his emotions. Happiness, excitement and _love,_ all those emotions, all directed to Alya. His emotions mixed with Alya's, that were almost the same, except Alya was more nervousness than anything else.

"Miss Marinette, we are ready!" Nathalie called her, and she ran to the shoot.

Adrien was leaning against one of the walls and looking at the camera with intensity. Marinette felt how her heart stopped, if that's how he looked in the adjusting frame, she was going to die in the next ones. _No, don't think that, he is just a guy, a handsome guy, but nothing else, you have a boyfriend._

"Move to the left, the lighting is better" The photographer shouted, and Adrien obeyed, looking gorgeous as he did.

"Can you turn to your left side, and look up your shoulder? The back of the jacket will display that way too" Marinette said and Adrien winked in return, doing as she said.

The whole shoot, even in between change of clothes, Adrien's sight was on Marinette, making Marinette a ball of wrecking nerves. She had tried multiple times to call Alya, so she could be by her side and calm her down, but Alya was laughing and flirting with Nino, and she felt like a bad friend if she dared to interrupt, so she had to deal with it herself. But it was weird, Adrien was gorgeous, that was a reason to make her feel uncomfortable, but the bad feeling all over him didn't disappeared, she didn't know what to think about him. Besides, everything was bolder when he was around, that only had happened with three people before. An old man who had been in the bakery a few years ago, Adrien and finally Chat Noir; being more aware of the world was a good thing when she was fighting and protecting Paris, so she didn't complained when Chat was around, but when she was trying to relax and not feel like the world was shouting in her ear, Adrien didn't help at all, she couldn't do much since he was her neighbor, but today he had doubled the intensity of the feelings.

Adrien had her in _alarm mode,_ the whole time,she was ready to jump at any word he could throw her, and he wasn't helping if he looked at her in the way he was.

"Okay, it's done! Prepare the girl!" The photographer shouted and Adrien was out of the set, walking to her. Marinette jumped and turned to the photographer, running away from him

"Can I see the pictures?"

"Of course"

He looked at the roll and was about to punch herself on the face, because she knew that if she punched Adrien, Gabriel was going to fire her, no matter how much he liked her. Adrien looked fantastic in every single picture, he made the clothes look elegant and desirable… he looked desirable. _No, Marinette, no._

"Woah, I look a-zoom!" Adrien said, appearing behind them

"Did you try to make a photography pun?" Marinette asked and looked at him frowning

"What do you mean try? It was good!" Adrien laughed "A-zoom, awesome, they sound similar"

"No, they don't" Marinette shook her head but heard the photographer laugh. "It wasn't funny"

"C'mon, Mari" He smiled but Marinette didn't said a thing "At least don't look at me like you are about to _shoot_ me" He grinned an Marinette squealed

"You _saturate_ me"

"Was that a pun?!" Adrien asked in enthusiasm "I knew you had it inside you"

"Don't freak out, Agreste" She smirked and returned to the tent, with Adrien following her.

"Where are my clothes?" Adrien asked and Marinette pointed at one of the chairs "I really like your clothes, I feel bad taking them off"

"Thank you" Marinette said and then realized that it wasn't just for the compliment that she had to say thanks "Really, thank you, I don't know what I would have done without you here"

"Hey, it's no problem. What are friends for?" Marinette turned in surprise, and her sight crashed in to his intense eyes "I still care deeply about you, you just have to remember that you did too"

"Is not that easy" She whispered, the guilt was eating her out

"I know, I don't care, I will wait as much as you need" His smile was so sincere that it made the world stop. Sadly not the weird feelings that surrounded him.

Marinette really wanted to like Adrien, then why was there a wall in between them? Oh yeah, she had built that, but why? she couldn't understand it.

"Mari, girl!" Alya was back, and Marinette's focus went from Adrien's beautiful face to her best friend "I'm so glad everything worked out, I'm sorry Nino and I were catching up"

"Yeah, sorry, M" Nino put his hand behind his head and shook his hair "But hey, now that everything is fine and you have the rest of the day free, I think we all should go for lunch, like old times"

"I-I don't know, I still have to watch the shoot for my woman line" Marinette answered and gave a fast look to Adrien "And I was meeting Nath after that"

"He can come, c'mon, it's on me" Nino said

Marinette was about to refuse again but one look at Alya changed it all. Alya wanted to go, she was almost begging with her eyes for Marinette to say yes, because she wanted to go but not alone

"Alright, I'll tell him" Marinette nodded and heard a squeal from Alya, who draw her closer and gave her a bear hug

"Adrien you are in, right?" Alya asked

"Sure, like old times" Adrien gasped, he didn't sound that convinced.

Marinette understood the feeling perfectly. She didn't knew how old times were, but this was going to be everything but old times.


	7. In Which We Talk About LB's Whereabouts

Marinette wasn't sure who was the most awkward one; Nathanael, Adrien or her. There was something in the air that just made the three of them to be in a bubble of uncomfortable feelings.

Nathanael wasn't a jealous guy, he was sweet, kind and trustworthy. He always called Marinette in the morning and goodnight, he was supportive of her work and he always showed to be crazy in love with her. But it was all very subtle, he wasn't clingy and he wasn't overprotective. Well, till now.

While Nino and Alya were completely oblivious to the world around them, talking, flirting and touching each other every time they could, Adrien was trying to pick up conversations with Marinette, only including Nathanael when Marinette was too shy to say something in return. And at the same time Nathanael had spent the whole lunch with his arm around Marinette's shoulders and kissing her cheek or lips when he could.

Marinette was trying to understand the whole situation but she couldn't, not completely at least. One thing was sure: there was something between her and Adrien Agreste. She didn't know what was that something, but Adrien and she surely had history that Nath knew about. And for the matter, also did Alya who always acted strange when Marinette mentioned Gabriel's son, and that right now, when she wasn't ignoring her thanks to Nino, her best friend was giving suspicious looks to her and to Adrien.

Had they been best friends? Was Adrien an old boyfriend? Did Adrien and she shared a special bond? Who knew? Not Marinette, that's for sure.

Adrien was weird feelings and bold sensations, that's what he was, but the closer to him and leaving prejudices behind he was… nice. He was handsome and kind, he paid attention to her the whole time, he had helped her when he didn't have to. Adrien Agreste was a nice person, she totally could see him being her friend in high school, but then why was so strange to be around him? What was the secret behind all these unwanted feelings?

Marinette couldn't find the answer to it, only that being around Adrien felt like a catastrophe about to happen… he made her nervous.

And he obviously made Nath nervous too, which made Marinette lose her mind.

Adrien started a new conversation with a question for Marinette, when Nathanael let a sound of frustration out of his mouth, a sound that made Marinette's brain spin. It all went dark around her and little candle lighted up a tiny door in her mind, the door opened and a flash of light and color sparked around her eyes.

A shadow of purple and white moved along the window, she was talking… with whom was she talking? It was a sweet innocent voice, but who was the owner of it was a mystery, it almost seemed like her conscience, a red spot flying around her telling her what to do. She was sitting in her old room, then there was this guy in front of her, dressed in a suit and with a pen on hand. Marinette could feel how a million ideas passed around her mind, in that moment in the past as well as this moment in the present.

Then again flashes, missing pieces of memories, all in front of her eyes like a movie.

A lovely smile, red hair and a promise, a call, a friend and a cat, a boat, moonlight, a glass box, again the red spot and the voice... a fight, butterflies, a fist bump, a beeping sound, and school, blonde hair, green eyes, pictures on the wall…

"Marinette!" Alya's worried voice brought Marinette back to the moment. She wasn't gone more than ten seconds, even if it felt like longer, she knew it wasn't a big amount of time, but it was enough for Alya to realize that something was wrong.

Alya was squeezing her best friend's hands, and directly looking at her through her glasses, waiting for an answer.

"I'm okay… it was a little memory… I can't place it thought" Marinette gasped. She felt Nathanael's hand caressing her cheek, calming her down; she saw Nino's worried eyes focusing on her and then she saw Adrien.

His green eyes were shining as he looked at her, the way he was looking at her was out of this world, he was worried but there was something that told Marinette that he wasn't expecting to save her, not as Alya who's eyes always showed the need to help, Adrien's eyes showed how much he was worrying and at the same time how he trusted she could put herself together alone. Marinette didn't know how to explain why she knew that only by looking at his eyes… it was like a connection, there was something about that sight that was extremely familiar. Adrien was familiar… strangely familiar, the kind of familiarity you get when you know someone new and remember another person, that was what Adrien was, a whole person who was another. Was that weird? Marinette was sure that was the weirdest thing ever.

"Do you need help, Mari?" Nath asked, his lips close to her forehead and brushing her hair

"You were akumatized… I knew that" Marinette said to her boyfriend "But when was that?"

"Mm…years ago?" Nathanael answered confused "You remembered it?"

"Yeah… but it's not about that, there are other pieces that I don't understand" Marinette shook her head "Doesn't matter, I'll check Alya's old blog later"

" _The Ladyblog_?" Adrien and Nino asked at the same time

"Yeah, I sometimes get these weird akuma memories and I watch Alya's old videos…" Marinette explained she still was trying to put two and two together; she was very tempted to check the blog from her phone.

"Why? You weren't in all those attacks; Alya shouldn't have been in all those attacks, she always had me sick worried, one of my biggest fears living in LA was that the crazy Papillion dude made an appearance again, this girl right here would have gotten herself killed" Nino huffed

Marinette smiled so hard at Nino's words, not only because the subject of her memory had been erased by them, but because Alya was with her mouth open, her eyes big as plates and a lovestruck expression all over hr, because all her fears and doubts were gone with those lovely words; just as Alya cared about Nino, Nino had never stopped caring about her.

"I wouldn't have, I was a pro, wasn't I Ma—Adrien? Tell him, I was freaking fantastic!"

"She was" Adrien laughed "But you still put yourself in danger all the time, it made us nuts, but at the same time I love the fact that we have those awesome videos"

"Right, I forgot how much of a fan you were of my blog" Alya smiled "He was totally in love with Ladybug and Chat Noir"

"Only Ladybug, Chat Noir was just awesome but not half as wonderful as Ladybug" Adrien answered and leaned across the table at the same time Marinette did

"What are you talking about? Chat Noir is just as wonderful as Ladybug was" She said in confidence "They completed each other, two parts of a whole"

"Yeah, still I have a soft spot for Ladybug" Adrien answered to Marinette, he was surprised that she had spoke to him but really happy with the words she had said

"I think I have a soft spot for Chat" Marinette said nodding "Also he is back, where is Ladybug, uh?"

"That's a really good question" Adrien sighed

"I'm doing my research on it" Alya joined the conversation "I think something happened to her, Chat seems to be looking for her, he was never good with cameras and journalists, except me, which was awesome, but now if he gets a chance to say something, he does"

"Like he was expecting Ladybug to see it" Nino added

"Yeah, I'm trying to follow Chat's moves. He left the city before Ladybug did, my guess is that he did to focus on his studies or moved outside of the country of them"

"Why do you have that theory?" Adrien asked Alya

"Alya is the only person who has enough evidence to know Ladybug and Chat Noir's age. Amazingly enough, they must be our age"

"Yeah, after years of Ladyblog and a few years on my own, I figured it out their ages, it wasn't that hard once you looked back. The change on their bodies helped, they were taller, Chat Noirs jaw changed, Ladybug looked less like a girl and more like a woman if you know what I mean…" Alya laughed, Marinette felt how her cheeks turned red, without having a reasonable reasons and then Adrien coughed as he was really uncomfortable about something "Well, seems like Adrien knows what I mean"

"He had a crazy crush on our beloved superheroine, of course he noticed" Nino laughed and crossed his arm around Alya's shoulders. Alya reacted without thinking, leaning closer and resting her head on his shoulder. "His room was full of pictures of her, then they changed for a few of— ouch!

Alya laughed at Nino and extended her hand to high five Adrien, who was staring at Nino as he was able to throw x-rays from his eyes.

"I apparently had pictures of my crush all over my room, too, is not that uncommon" Marinette said before realizing she was sweet talking to Adrien. Why did she felt the need to make Adrien feel right? It was such a weird sensation, and so fast, one moment she is feeling all weird about her old friend and the other she _needs_ to make him feel alright.

"Really?" Adrien asked and blinked fast to the surprise.

"Yeah, or so Alya said once… I don't know who was my mysterious crush but apparently I was really tiring about it" Marinette smiled

"Probably me, right?" Marinette jumped at the words of her boyfriend. She completely forgot Nathanael was there. Why was Adrien Agreste so distracting?

"Probably" Marinette answered and stole a kiss from his lips, only to later look at Alya and known only by her sight that the pictures totally were of another guy. "Anyway, is so damn normal, especially if it's a famous crush, Ladybug was very famous years ago, right?"

"Yeah, she was, she _still_ is" Alya answered "The director of the magazine asked me to start writing about Ladybug and Chat Noir, she knows about my blog, I mean who doesn't, and she wants me to figure it out what is going on"

"Like why is Chat back?" Nathanael asked

"Yeah, and about this new guy" Alya added

" _Which new guy_?" Adrien and Marinette asked at the unison

"You didn't hear about it?!" Alya placed both of her hands in the white wood table making it shake, her mouth opened in excitement and Nino looking at her like she was the sun "Last night, while Chat Noir was too busy flirting with Paris' nameless vigilante—

 _I wasn't flirting_ Adrien thought _I was trying to comfort her_

 _He wasn't flirting, he was helping!_ The thought ran through Marinette's mind.

"There's a vigilante?" Nino asked

"She appeared a few months ago, she is not a superhero so she only does minor stuff

"She still helps!" Adrien shouted "Personally I believe she is pretty awesome"

Marinette wanted to hug him, but that would be weird not only because she had been a bitch to him but because it would threw away her identity.

"Yeah, she is pretty cool, and Chat Noir seems to like her which makes me like her even more, I trust Chat's judgment… so as I was saying, while Chat Noir flirted with Vigilante last night, at the other side of town another mysterious shadow appeared, there are blurry pictures of him, amateurs as I once was got the best ones and they sent them to the Ladyblog, it's amazing how active it has been since Chat Noir came back! They don't care if I haven't posted in years; they still want to know my opinion!"

"That's great, _Als_ " Nino leaned and kissed Alya's forehead, which made everyone stop for a minute. Marinette expected for Alya to freak out or shout mad but she only shifted her position for a more comfortable one. Also she noticed how Alya looked at Nino with a characteristic look, the "we will talk about this later" look that she always gave to Marinette; and Nino seemed to know it well because he nodded at it. "So how cool is this new guy?"

"He looks pretty cool, even in the blurry pictures, and my readers are as sure as I am that it is another miraculous holder"

" _Another miraculous holder?!"_ Adrien and Marinette jumped from their seats in excitement and confusion

"After all these years, you still do everything in sync" Nino laughed "Incredible"

"Yeah" Adrien nodded looking at his lap, eyes focused on his ring

"I don't quite remember that, Marinette barely spoke with Adrien" Nathanael said

"But we were friends?" Marinette asked trying to place the little information she was given by Adrien and Alya

"We were" Adrien nodded "We just had a rough start, that's all" Adrien stated looking at Nathanael. Jealousy was eating alive both of the guys.

Marinette didn't wanted to make things more awkward than they already were so she leaned against Nathanael to calm him down, and focused all her concentration on Alya and she decided to ignore Adrien.

"What are your theories for the new guy?"

"I have so many!" Alya shouted which made Adrien and Nino laugh. Same old Alya "But I believe they are both looking for Ladybug"

"I bet Chat Noir is, not so sure about the new guy" Adrien whispered with a shadow on his voice (A.N: I don't know if that is a real expression on English but in Spanish is so you'll have to deal)

"I believe he is too, why would he be here if not that? There's no magical villain around for him to appear, right?" Nino asked

"Yeah, but Chat Noir has reasons to look for her, what are this guy's reasons?" Adrien attacked back.

"Maybe he knows something, Chat Noir doesn't seem to have a clue to what happened to her" Marinette added "Maybe he is here to help Chat, but they haven't met yet"

"I so agree with Mari" Nino pointed at Marinette "I feel that he needs an objective partner if he wants to find her"

"What do you mean?" Adrien frowned at Nino

"It's no secret that Chat Noir was in love with Ladybug, I think he still is in love with Ladybug, he is not trying to find his partner, he is trying to find the love of his life"

"Whoa, didn't know you knew Chat Noir personally. They haven't been spotted together in years, how do you know he is still in love with her, uh?" Adrien leaned to Nino with an accusative look on his face

"When love is real, it doesn't go away, no matter how hard you try" Thought Nino was talking to Adrien, his sight was on Alya's

"That's true" Alya nodded and sighed

"I don't think he is in love with her" Adrien said "He loves her, that's for sure but they were never in a relationship"

"C'mon Agreste, they both were in love with each other" Marinette forgot completely of her decision and spoke directly to the guy "It's obvious, in Chat Noir more than Ladybug but she was too, the last years they were spotted together, she was madly in love with him"

"I think you went mad" Adrien said in the middle of a laugh "Ladybug was never interested in Chat Noir in a romantic way" It still hurt to say that, but Adrien had to affront the truth.

"Believe me, I have seen every single video and read every single article you can find on Ladybug and Chat Noir: she was in love with him"

"I feel like she loved him a lot, but I'm with Adrien, she never had romantic feelings towards Chat" Alya said to her friend "I have seen the videos and wanted to believe that _Ladynoir_ was real, but it never was, Mari"

"But—

"Mari could be right" Nath said and when was about to give an argument his phone ringed "Pardon me"

Nathanael stood up from the table and went to the back of the tiny coffee shop where the big black and white letters made his red hair stand up like a red traffic light. Marinette smiled at it and her attention came back to her friends on the table

"I think it would be really sad if they were in love and never told each other" Adrien sighed

"I think it wouldn't matter to them, if they get the chance to be with each other when they meet again they will not cry about the time lost but try to make the most of the time they have now" Marinette assured with a smile on her face

Adrien couldn't answer to that. If Marinette was right and Ladybug had really been in love with him or worse, still was in love with him, he didn't know how he could react. He had dated guys and girls, some of them were fun but others were serious, he had had a really long relationship and he had loved other people, it's true that his love for Ladybug had never faded away, but romantic feelings like the ones he had when he was younger, yeah he wasn't so sure.

Also his crush on Marinette was re-blooming, if it hadn't completely bloomed already, and he was focusing his feelings on her, to make her like him again and hopefully make her remember him.

"I don't know" Adrien finally said in a low tone "I don't want a heartbroken Ladybug"

"You think he doesn't love her?" Alya jumped into the conversation again

"You said it yourself, Chat Noir was flirting with Vigilante" Not really, but it was the best way Adrien found to say what he was about to say "Chat Noir never really flirted with anyone but Ladybug and he always focused completely on her, and now he looks pretty interested in this nameless girl"

"They are only friends" Marinette said and Adrien smiled, he wanted to hear what she was going to say next, because she had called him _friend._ "I think they are just helping out each other, they get along, I mean you have seen the pictures Chat is always laughing and joking around her

"Yeah, but what about her? Is so hard to get a good picture of her, you think it would be easier since she is just a normal person but damn the girl knows how to hide from the cameras" Alya gasped "I wish I could have a little bit of information of her, why is she doing it? What is her motivation? She appeared out of nowhere

"So did Chat Noir and Ladybug" Marinette remind her

"Yeah but there was a villain, she just decided she wanted to fight crime one day and there she was. You have no idea how hard I have been trying to get information of her, got distracted now that Chat is around but with him is easier, now this girl is total mystery"

"Ask Chat Noir then, I bet he remembers you"

"How could he forget her" Adrien laughed and winked at Alya who showed a proud expression with a big confident smile

The three friends kept talking and laughing, joking around like old times. Marinette who had been afraid of messing up things for Alya and Nino felt relieved, her thoughts had been wrong, this was like old times, I mean she didn't had any memories to prove it but it felt like old times and that was enough. Also it made Adrien bearable. Alright, bearable was a bad word, he was nice, really, _really_ nice, nothing like Gabriel Agreste as she had expected. She had a good relationship with her boss but she still knew he wasn't the most adorable person on earth and on the contrary Adrien was adorable to the bone. His smile was charming and his laugh melodic, Adrien was beautiful. Marinette thought she could fall in that moment for him, yeah she completely would, if that aching on her heart and the bold sensations on her body around him didn't exist, she would completely fall. If only.

"Mari" Marinette looked out for the voice above her and found her boyfriend looking at her

Oh no, she had completely forgotten about him and there she was thinking in how she could fall for Adrien Agreste. What she was doing? Yesterday it was Chat Noir and today Adrien, what was wrong with her?

Nathanael was the sweetest guy to ever exist, he loved her so much, he had been for her in the darkest times and had supported her in everything she wanted to do no matter what, and that's how she was repaying it to him? Thinking about other guys? It wasn't fair.

Still Marinette wasn't surprised, three months ago things had changed between her and Nathanael… as well as everything else, that consuming feeling wasn't only taking over her but also the others around her.

"Something wrong?" Marinette asked, reaching for his hand

"They need me in the office right now, there's something wrong with one of the newest editions and I have to check it out" He frowned "Rain check?"

"Sure, _mon chou_ " Marinette placed her hands on the table to impulse her body to Nathanael's and find his lips on a kiss, she had to make up for her thoughts.

"Goodbye guys, it was nice" He waved and turned again to Marinette "See you later, _ma belle_ " Nathanael was happy and kissed her again, only to finish the kiss with a sight to Adrien, who's blood was boiling.

"Really we should leave too" Alya said looking at the watch on her wrist "I gotta go back to the editorial but before I gotta drop out Marinette at the fabric market"

"I almost forgot" Marinette whispered

"Is okay, Adrien and I gotta buy some groceries since I'm staying with him for a while—

"You staying at my house?" Adrien asked confused

"Did I forget to tell you?"

"Probably" Alya giggled "So typical of you"

"Yeah, I'm lucky Adrien loves me?" Nino said looking at his friend, begging for a positive answer

"Yeah, lucky you" Adrien rolled his eyes

"I love you, dude!" Nino shouted and hugged Adrien "So since I'll stay with Adrien and Adrien is Mari's neighbor and Mari and Alya are best friends, I guess we will see each other very soon"

"I guess" Alya replied with a smile

"Amazing!" Nino stood up from the table "So girls, I'll follow you to the door, the food as I said is on me"

Alya, Marinette and Adrien followed Nino, makings small chat that turned to be awkward between Mari and Adrien, while Adrien was frustrated about it, Marinette felt comfortable with it because while it was weird and embarrassing it felt way too familiar and that always made Marinette feel good, familiarity was a good thing.

When the girls went in a different direction and Nino and Adrien were already on the car. Nino sighed

"It's gonna be hard to get you out of the clouds, am I right?" Adrien smirked at his best friend

"It was like nothing had ever happened, I know we will have to talk about it at some point but it was perfect, better than I expected it to be"

"Why do I have a feeling that she is the reason you came back?"

"It's part of the many reasons why coming back was such a good idea but it's not THE reason"

"And which is that powerful reason?" Adrien turned on the car and started driving, waiting for an answer

"You know, same as you, I gotta find Ladybug"

Adrien almost crashed the car against a lamppost.

 **OKAY I'M SO HYPED WITH THE NEWS WE GOT AT COMIC CON THAT I WOKE UP AND WROTE LIKE 5 FICS... yet I still can't figure out this site out, I feel like a grandma :|**

 **anyways hope you like and thanks for the support! :D**

 **find me on tumblr buginettte**


	8. In Which We Add Pieces To The Puzzle

"Whoa, dude, you could have been a bit more subtle about your surprise" Nino said shaking his hair and then fixing his seatbelt

"I'm sorry, your joke wasn't good

"We both know it wasn't a joke and that you already fucked up so don't come at me with bad excuses and distracting words. I know you are Chat Noir, _there_ , I said it"

"Okay, okay, next time can I park the car first so we don't crash and become stickers on a wall or something?"

"Sure, let's go to your house and we talk, that was the plan after all"

"Then why didn't you wait till we were there?!"

"Because you asked and I wanted to see your reaction, didn't expect to almost die!"

"What the hell were you expecting?!" Adrien hit his palms against the handle

"I don't know! I didn't give anything explicit, I thought you were going to laugh or crack a joke to get away of the subject! After years of lying and excuses, you failed at a phrase that could be taken as a joke related to the crush you had on Ladybug"

"Well excuse me, but I know when you are joking and you weren't joking at all" Nino looked at his friend, his brows middle-raised "Okay, I fucked up, I admit it… but how do you know?"

"I thought you wanted to talk about this at your apartment"

"Yeah, yeah… I better start driving then" and so he did.

The silence reign between them till they were sitting in front of each other in Adrien' apartment.

"So you are the new guy Alya was so excited about, uh?"

"I'm glad to see that you aren't so dense anymore, bro" Nino gave him a teasing smile "Jade Turtle at your services"

"I'll make sure to take your word on that" Adrien chuckled "Dude, you have a miraculous!"

"Yes, I do"

"When did this happen?"

"Just after LB disappeared, Wayzz found me; apparently his old master had an eye on me for a while"

"Wayzz is your kwami's name? I know Wayzz!"

"Yeah, I know. He must be asleep somewhere in the apartment, but you'll see him later"

"I hope he doesn't' eat cheese because Plagg is going to get territorial"

"Nah, that's not his thing, no need to worry" He smiled "Territorial, no wonder you get along"

"How funny" Adrien faked a laugh "Anyways, when and how did you figure it out? I mean, it's been years"

"I didn't figure out till this week; I had my doubts, you always were on Alya's suspects list, you know? I wasn't really looking to find out Chat Noir's identity right away, thought Wayzz told me it would be for the best if I did. So I followed you a few nights ago, trying to see if I could talk to you, yet you were really busy with Miss Vigilante, so I kept following you till you dropped her and then I saw you enter your apartment, and since you never came out again, I connected the dots." He explained "By the way, you should be more careful if you are dropping Marinette off every night, is not the smartest decision to jump right away to your apartment" Oh great, he knew about Marinette too.

"I am careful! I have years of experience, I know how to distract and fool people on my way back home

"You didn't fool me" Nino said

"You got powers, different" He remarked "Yet I'm a little ashamed that I didn't realized you were following me"

"Oh, I can be very quiet when I want to"

"Dude, this is so cool! I always wished to have someone with who I could share the secret"

"I feel like you wished Ladybug to be that someone

"I mean, yes, but she was too fond to the "don't reveal your identity" rule, I knew she wanted to forget it a few times but her duty always came first"

"Sadly, it would be useful to know who she was

"Tell that to me" He sighed "Why are you looking for her? I know something happened with her, yet I always tried to convince myself that it had something to do with me or the fact that there weren't any more magical villains around, that she focused on school as I did and she decided to live a normal civilian life… that being the reason why she erased me of her life…"

"I understand why would you think that, being that far away you didn't allowed yourself to thin the worst, but, Adrien, difference to you I have been taught to think the worst.

"What do you mean?" Adrien asked scared

"Let me start from the beginning, then I can make more sense: Master Fu, who I'm aware you got to know a few times when Plagg got sick, well, he was the Big Guardian and the holder of the Turtle Miraculous before me; since he died, Wayzz had to teach me and guide me to be the Big Guardian and it's not a job to take lightly, I know more stuff than you know about the Miraculous, not everything because I'm still learning and there are secrets revolving around the world that are secret even to us, but I know more and I got powers that go beyond battle that I had to learn how to use. My mission as a Miraculous holder is quite different than the others, I need preparation in areas the other Miraculous holders don't ever get to prepare, it's more than skills on battle, it is all about the harmony of the Miraculous. Since my role is different, my kwami is also different. Kwamis can sense each other in determinate ratios, but there's three exceptions, Wayzz, Plagg and Tikki

"Plagg?" Adrien asked proud

"Plagg and Tikki are two parts of a whole; they sense each other no matter how apart of each other they are. Same goes with Wayzz; he can sense all the other kwamis, when their powers are not dormant. That's how he warned Master Fu about Papillon years ago. And that's how he realized something was wrong with Ladybug

Adrien felt how a knot appeared on his throat, he wasn't ready for this. He had been hoping and lying to himself for so long to avoid this, to avoid the worst thoughts and situations that could explain Ladybug vanishing from his world.

"Wayzz can't sense Tikki anymore, which makes us think that something happened to her and to Ladybug. The power of the miraculous wasn't corrupted and he is sure that Tikki was with her chosen when she disappeared of the map

Adrien didn't answer he just shook his head, strands of hair falling into his eyes, covering them and making it easier for him to hide the tears that were about to run out.

"Wait" Adrien had realized something "Plagg said something related to that… that his senses weren't the same, that it was strange… but he tried to convince me that it wasn't a big deal"

"He lied" Nino said

"PLAGG!" Adrien shouted

"Adrien, calm down, we can—

"Little liar come here!" Adrien shouted again and Plagg appeared in front of him, his little arms crossed

"Who do you call little liar, uh?"

"You! You told me it wasn't a big deal! Why don't you let me worry about you?"

"Oh, you already told him" Plagg looked at Nino and sighed "Well, someone forgive me for trying to protect you"

"Protect me from what? I am an adult, I can take it"

"No, you can't, that's why you been trying to find excuses for Ladybug's disappearance, if you could handle it you would have accepted the true already"

"Okay, there's no need to be dramatic, we can all talk about it and start figuring out this puzzle" Nino said, now he was accompanied by a green kwami.

"Hi, Wayzz, nice to see you again"

"My pleasure, Chat Noir" He made a little bow and Adrien bowed with only his head in return "I agree with Nino, we should calm down and go around what we know, if we work like a team it will be easier"

"Alright" Adrien agreed; he sat down once again and started playing with the sleeve of his sweater. "I think Plagg should start talking, since he hasn't said a thing—

"Don't be mean" Nino scolded

"Yes, don't be mean" Plagg agreed "But I will start… the last time I sensed Tikki was a Friday, we had been a month on the states, it was late and Adrien was going to a party with one of his roommates, Adrien had been complaining that Ladybug didn't returned his texts"

"So Ladybug didn't answered before Tikki disappeared, uh, that's curious" Nino added "What was the last thing Ladybug sent you?"

Adrien looked for his phone on the back pocket of his pants. He tapped on the screen and searched into his messages, he already knew how much he had to scroll to find the chat with her name, it was part of his daily routine to stare at the text.

"There you have" Adrien offered the phone to Nino

" _Being busy is part of life, chaton! I'll call you as soon as I can, stop worrying about me, okay?"_

"I always worry about you, Buginette, I'll be waiting" Adrien said out loud. He didn't need to read it, he knew their last conversation by memory "And then there goes a few text of me, of course, _worrying_ "

"So, assuming she didn't lie to you

"She never lied to me"

"Well… it doesn't seem like she wanted to erase you from her life, so this only proves that something happened to her. Have you tried to track down her phone?"

"Yeah, but it was her Ladybug phone. When you are a superhero companies tend to give you special treatment, she didn't need to give any information"

"Damn"

"I know" Adrien sighed "I tried everything in my power to find her, nothing works, and now you are telling me that her kwami also vanished. We can't figure it out this in our civilian form.

"Especially when it's related to magic" Wayzz added "We have been tracking down all the miraculous we could. The Fox and the Bee are safe with us, the Peacock is in good hands, the Ladybug Miraculous is missing, as we have already established and… the Butterfly Miraculous was corrupted once again-"

"WHAT?!" Adrien interrupted. He stood on his feet once again "No, no, no, no, no!" He walked in circles

"Adrien, breathe" Plagg said touching his cheek

"No, this is not happening again, I can't do that again" He jolted on his place "I don't want to"

"Adrien, dude" Nino had his hands on his shoulders and was searching for his sight "Hey, it's okay, it's not happening again, we will explain"

"I can't do that again" He whispered and hugged Nino, trying to put himself together

"You won't" Nino assured "The corruption was different this time and… it went dormant too"

But Adrien wasn't listening. He had his hands on fits, his breathe was uneven and he was crying on Nino's shoulders

"I can't do it, I can't, I can't" He kept saying

"Adrien, breathe!" Plagg shouted worried.

The kwami touched his tiny forehead with Adrien's and started to say words

"Adrien, five things you can see"

"I—

"Tell me five things you can see" Plagg's voice was sweet, diferrent to his normal one, also more calmed.

"The door… a sofa… mm.. I " Adrien said

"Be calm, it's okay, so what color is the door?"

"Black… it is black… and the sofa is white, and there's a glass table and Nino's shirt is blue… the wall is white…"

"Excellent, now four things you can hear" Plagg continued

"You, I can hear you" Adrien said between sobs "And I can hear Nino's heart and his breathing… I can hear me"

"Perfect, perfect, should I go on?" Plagg asked and Adrien shook his head

"I'm fine… I'm fine" He smiled "Thank you"

"Anytime"

Adrien released Nino from the hug and cleaned his tears

"Are you sure you are okay? Nino rubbed his friend shoulder

"Yes… sometimes it happens"

"How often does it happen?"

Adrien gave a look to Plagg

"Usually when he is taken by surprise, and more often it's when he has nightmares, it's been a while since it had happen in the day time" The kwami explained

"Plagg takes care of me when he can, so I'm fine, I visited a therapist and all, she gave us the coping mechanism"

"You should have told me, I'm your friend"

"I couldn't tell you the truth, I had to pretend I was a victim of the battle to my therapist, if Plagg hadn't insisted I would have never told anyone"

"Well, now you have me, and I want to know if this happens again, okay?"

"Okay" He smiled; it was good to have a friend like Nino, to think that there was a time when he was an isolated kid… it all seemed so far away now.

"So… it was corrupted" Adrien cleared his throat

"Yes, Adrien, but it was different. The way it felt was different, her use was corrupted but not by a corrupted soul… I can't put it into words, but I can assure you that is not the same that the last time" Wayzz spoke "I felt that, minutes later I felt Tikki disappear"

"That's the strange energy I felt!" Plagg shouted

"You too?" Wayzz asked, not as excited as Plagg seemed to be

"Yes, I couldn't figure it out what it was! And then everything changed"

"I see" Wayzz hummed

"What changed?" Nino asked the black kwami

"Ah, er, well"

"It's honesty moment" Adrien reminded at Plagg

"Don't get mad at me" Plagg said it in a bitter tone, but it was clearly a beg. "I forgot who Ladybug was, I'm sure I knew her civilian identity, but from that moment is like I never did"

"You knew who Ladybug was?" Adrien tried to keep his cool, but it was hard "You never told me"

"You made a deal with her, Tikki and I respected it, it's also a safety thing; If there had been a moment in which revealing her identity turned to be necessary I would have done it… if I remembered who she was I would have told you already

Nino sighed

"Wayzz can't remember who she is either, and he was there when she was chosen… this is bigger than we thought"

"Indeed it is" Wayzz sighed just like Nino

"So let me get this straight" Adrien said

"But you are not straight" Nino joked, he felt the need to stop the tension Adrien was bringing to the conversation. Plagg laughed but Adrien just frowned at him

"This is serious" He clenched his teeth "For what you said, you don't think Ladybug and her kwami vanished out of nowhere, you think it has something to do with the Butterfly Miraculous"

"Yes" Nino and Wayzz said at the unison

"But do we think it was too different events that tangled togheter or that this is only one event"

"That's what we are trying to figure it out, I lean to the second option" Nino pointed at Adrien's phone "Your text makes me doubt, but that's why we are here, to figure it out"

"Do you have a plan? Because Plagg and I are still in point zero, and we have been for years

"So have we, but I have mastered skills that will help us. We came back to Paris to track down her magic and also because we have two powerful allies in here"

"Since when?" Adrien gave a look to Plagg, but he was as confused as him

"A civilian who dedicated her life to figure it out who Ladybug was, I'll take care of that one" Nino smirked and Adrien rolled his eyes "And the husband of a missing miraculous holder"

"Missing? Who is missing?"

"The holder of the peacock miraculous"

"But you said it was in safe hands" Adrien pointed at Wayzz

"It is, her husband found the miraculous, sadly he didn't found her" Adrien bit his inner cheek at the statement. He felt sorry for the guy, he knew how bad could it be for a husband to lose his wife, he had seen it all on his father… his father.

Wait a second.

A flash of a distant memory appeared on his mind.

He remembered the book, and the vault behind his mother's painting. There were things there, suspicious things and then, that little thing he hadn't give a minute of his attention shined on his mind. Blue, green and gold sparkling in front of his eyes.

"Adrien" Nino snapped his fingers in front of him

"This is not happening" He growled "Please tell me our ally is not my dad, please"

"Definitely not as dense as you were" Nino said

"Fan-fucking-tastic" Oh look, another problem to add to his list, he was acquiring Marinette's way of swearing.

 **IMPORTANT INFORMATION BELOW:**

 **OKAY SO... I completely forgot to warn you that english is not my native language, so I'm sorry if there's any mistakes I try my best and constructive critics are always welcome. And I think I figured it out how to reply messages so yeah there's that :)**


	9. In Which Chat Noir Gets A Haircut

How did his life turned to be this way? That's what Adrien wondered as he circled around his bedroom. He was never going to find the answer to the question, he knew it, yet it kept appearing on his mind.

After years of wondering what had happened to his mother, now he had a clue, a real clue and it still guided him nowhere. Her mother had been a Miraculous holder, _just like him._

Nino, Plagg and Wayzz had explained that it wasn't uncommon for people of the same family to get a miraculous.

"Once Tikki and chose twins, oh it was hilarious!" Plagg had said, and started a tale about two Japanese brothers that had become Ladybug and Chat Noir. "They discovered each other's identities at the moment they celebrated their first battle, it was so fun, they were so funny"

Adrien had smiled at his stories but it was still hard to focus. His mother was somewhere in the world, his father knew more than he ever told him and things were a mess once again.

Nino had offered him to do all the talking in between them, but Adrien wasn't ready to see his father. He had lied to him for years and that hurt, after all it was his mother, yet at the same time he understood why his father had kept the Miraculous information to himself, how could Gabriel know that his own son was going to receive a miraculous only a few years later?.

And that opened more questions. If his father knew about her mother, maybe he knew about Adrien too. Wayzz said that Gabriel had been collaborating for years with Master Fu and that he paid for lots of researches and missions to rescue his wife. Maybe all this time Gabriel had pretended not to know.

There was a time when Gabriel showed interest in his ring, but it fade quickly; a normal thing on those days, or so Adrien had thought, maybe his father knew he couldn't do anything about it and decided to let it go. Thought let it go wasn't exactly his father, so he imagined that if he did in fact know, he had done it for the love of his son and wife, and not because he had decided to calm down.

He wasn't ready to face anything right now.

Nino was on the living room, he was talking on the phone, and for how upset he sounded Adrien knew it was his publicist or agent; probably something about the relationship stunt, it was always the same.

Plagg was sitting on top of his desk, eating quiet, no bothering Adrien.

Adrien sighed and stopped walking around. He stood in front of the window and looked how the purple tones in the sky were fading into a dark blue, and how the stars were slowly lighting up the Parisian sky.

He could see how people were taking pictures in the border of the river, people chatting in the café downstairs, musicians playing ballads at the side of the street creating a beautiful atmosphere to tourist who took their cameras to film or catch the moment in a picture. The soft swirling of the wind made the trees shake and the appearance of the dark in the sky made the streets of Paris to glow with their signs, lamps and candles. At the left of his apartment, meters away from where he was, the Eiffel Tower turned on it's lights and a chorus of voices screamed in awe.

Adrien had always tried to understand the surprise and amazement the tourist had, but he never did, not before, not when Paris was something so familiar; but now, after years of being away, he understood: Paris was breathtaking, it was so full of life and it run in its own vibe, romantic, classic and indie at the same time. Paris was magical.

Adrien spent hours just admiring the view his apartment provided. It was good not to think anything, and Paris was so distracting. You could notice who was Parisian and who a tourist only by looking at them, it was so interesting to see people from different places to enjoy the city so much. It was a nice way to lost track of time.

He could have spend more time there if Nino hadn't interrupted with a knock on his door

"Dude, you are okay in there?"

"Yeah" He answered.

"I'm going out with Alya, you don't need anything?"

"No, I'm fine. Have fun with Alya" He said mechanically

"Adrien, you can be honest with me"

"I'm fine, I'm going to patrol the city"

"Okay, call me if something happens"

"Sure, have fun" Adrien said ending the conversation.

He turned around and made a sign to his kwami. Plagg sighed but got ready to transform him.

Once in his suite, he was out of the window, running through rooftops and skipping pipes. He was looking at the city from the best point of view

Marinette felt weird.

She felt sad and confused, and she didn't know why.

She had sit on her apartment floor in front of the TV with her old black cat in the middle of her legs, an old sketch in hand, passing pages with designs she had done the last winter. She was trying to find a scarf to start knitting. She had the perfect color of yarn to start, the only thing missing was the design she was looking for, a design she had draw so many times that she knew by memory, yet she still needed her notes to pass it from paper to reality.

And that's when the feelings started to pile one after and another and it had happened again. Marinette felt dizzy, the sound of a loud screeching whistle echoing on her ears. Tears stream down her face and panic took over her.

It had happened again.

Luckily for her it didn't last as long as the last time had. Sadly she still couldn't give an explanation to such odd situation. She had visited multiple therapists to ask about it, all had given her the same answer, that it was probably a panic attack, something likely to happen considering her accident. Marinette knew it could be that, but it didn't make sense, because nothing triggered them, no situation was similar to another, those attacks just happened without any explanation.

She usually called Alya when this things happened, but Alya had her own problems today, it wouldn't be right. And calling Nathanaël wasn't an option. It was really sad how that phrase had become a normal thing for her. When they started dating, Marinette called him for everything, if something happy happened, if something ridiculous happened, if she thought about him, anything was an excuse to call Nathanaël, but lately the less Nathanaël knew, the better. She knew it wasn't right, she knew she had to put an end to this, but it was Nathanaël, sweet and kind Nathanaël who did nothing but loving her.

Life was a mess and Marinette didn't know how to fix it. The closest thing to a solution was not to think about it and concentrate in her knitting project. But when the scarf she was knitting was done, there was nothing much left to do. She petted her kitten for a while till he got bored and left her alone.

Marinette stood up from the floor and turned off the TV. She admired the baby blue scarf on her hands, it was perfect. Designing scarves wasn't hard to do, but this scarf was unique and she held this design close to her heart, she wasn't sure why, but she had been drawing these same scarf for years. And after years of only drawing she had finally knitted it, so she couldn't help but feeling proud of her work.

When her stare drifted from the scarf to her window her mood changed.

"Damn, I'm late" She shouted, running to her closet.

She took all the vigilante clothes she had design and made for herself and chose the warmest one, the movement of the trees had gave her a clue of the weather outside.

Already with clothes on, she threw on top of them a dark green peacoat, hiding on its left pocket a black mask.

She walked a few streets down the block till she found the familiar alley, in which a stair was her way to the rooftops. Once there she started running, looking for a male figure dressed in black leather.

Adrien had stopped to take a break in the rooftop of a building close to the Latin Square. Latin Square was one of Adrien's favorite places, it was so full of life. People walking up and down the streets trying to find something to eat, big book stores at the corners of the streets, people singing and laughing while they took pictures, and the view to Notre Dame at the other side of the bridge was also a pretty thing to look at.

It was a quiet night, and Adrien, standing in the rooftop, leaning in one of the pipes walls was enjoying the beautiful view and the calm

"Catch me!" Someone shouted in the middle of a giggle and then Marinette appeared. She was jumping in front of him and away of the rooftop, almost free fall style.

Adrien cat's sensed activated. He jumped to catch Marinette almost immediately, taking her by her ankle. He threw his batton to the wall so he could stop the fall, catching it in between his legs. With all the strength he had he managed to sit on it with a giggly Marinette on his arms.

"That was fun" She smiled to him

"What the hell were you thinking?!" Adrien shouted to her. He couldn't believe she was laughing "Why did you do that?"

"I was bored, nothing is going on today and I finally found you so…

"I was distracted, you could have hurt yourself!

"Don't be overdramatic; I knew you were going to catch me"

"How were you so sure? Why don't you think before you do things?" Adrien sighed. Other fast jump and they were back in the rooftop.

Marinette was ready to give a mad answer to him. Why he was acting so weird? He was the one who was goofy all the time, he was the one who always insisted in having fun when she turned too serious. What was wrong with him?

One look at Chat's face and she knew something was going on, his face was an open book.

"I'm not sorry I did, I had fun and I trust you… I'm sorry that I did when you clearly are having a bad day" Marinette crossed her arms against her chest, expecting for an answer

Chat Noir only gave her a little look, then he focused once again in the view of the city. Marinette didn't look away. He was frowning, something was bothering him badly, his mouth was an horizontal, not showing any emotion, and Marinette wished she could have a better look at his eyes but the mask and his hair were almost covering them completely.

"You hair is really long, it has grown a lot since the first time we met" Marinette said, she didn't like awkward silences "Doesn't it bother you? My hair always bothers me, that's why I usually have it tied in some way, especially when I'm in vigilante mode… you know it's easier to run through buildings when your hair isn't smashing against your eyes every five minutes…"

"Yeah, it's been bothering me, but I haven't had any time to go for a cut" Chat Noir finally answered

"What about now? You don't seem busy" Marinette saw how he looked at her from the corner of his eyes "And we don't want our beloved Chat Noir to fall from a rooftop just because he can't see"

"Not going to happen" The guy extended his hand to her, showing that he had a hair tie on his wrist "I always carry one with my hair is long, I can wear it till tomorrow when hair salons open once again"

"What if you didn't need a hair salon?"

"What you mean?" He asked interested

"I mean that I know someone who is incredibly talented and could cut your hair for free" Marinette smirked

"Oh, really?" Chat asked with a smirk

"Yeah, you could come by my apartment and meet her, she is really good"

"I bet she is" He laughed "Now?"

"Sure, I'm sure she is not doing anything important" Chat walked closer to her, opening his arms, ready to lift her of her feet

"Then let's go, princess" And they were off.

Adrien had already been in Marinette's apartment, multiple times in fact, but the lights were usually off when he was in there. He left Marinette, he kissed her cheek as goodbye and then he was out, but tonight it was different, he was here to stay. The lights were on and the music too, and Marinette's apartment was displayed in front of his eyes.

It was the same size as his, but it looked more spacious. The living room, in which he was now, was painted in a soft cream color, walls covered in pinkish and nudes decorations. A white sofa in the middle of the living room with fluffy pillows displayed on them, a big squared carpet in middle of it and the TV white wooden furniture; also there was a little table made of glass with fashion magazines and a candle. He could see only a part of the kitchen from where he was standing, but it looked as neat as the living room was.

The door to Marinette's room was closed but he imagined that it looked as much as the living room did.

Turning back, he found a white shelf with books, a stereo and an old style phone; beside the shelf there were pictures of her parents and her on graduation day, a few with Alya and other's with Nathanaël, pictures that Adrien decided to ignore. There were a few photos of Marinette with people that he didn't knew, but he figured it out were university friends.

"Are you ready, kitty?" Marinette came back from the kitchen with a handle of things in hand.

Adrien nodded and followed Marinette to the mirror on the other extreme of the room. Marinette offered him a bench to sit on and started to place the things she had on hand in the closest table.

"Let's start" Marinette took a round bottle and sprayed water on Chat's hair

"Hey!" Adrien jumped a bit from his seat

"Oops!" Marinette giggled

"Oops? You know kittens don't like water. I'm not forgiving you for this" Adrien frowned, but didn't take long for him to smile. Marinette watching his reflection in the mirror shook her head to the sides, he was so dramatic.

Marinette took the purple comb on the table and use it to divide and make sections of Chat's hair, being really careful to not pick on his ears. Swirling pieces of hair in between her fingers she grabbed them and clipped them with bobby pins.

At the sight of the handsome guy in the mirror, with colorful bobby pins and a hilarious hairstyle, not Marinette or Adrien could contain their laugh.

"What are you laughing at?" Adrien tried to look mad but he couldn't stop laughing at his own vision

Marinette covered her mouth with her hand and closed down her eyes, melodic peals of laughter coming out of her mouth. She rested her forehead on Chat's shoulder at an attempt to stop her laugh.

Adrien felt like his heart lit in flames, and at every pump the fire spread all over his body; he felt so warm inside, the fire was melting every piece of ice, every cold spot of his body and his mind. Marinette's laugh made him feel like all the sadness and confusion that his talk with Nino had brought him was nothing but a distant memory. Marinette made him feel at ease.

"Okay, okay.. let's get into business" Marinette pulled herself together and got a serious expression on her face, yet her mouth was still trembling trying to become a smile once again "How short?"

"Just chop it off a bit, long enough to still be able to do a pony tail, but short enough so it doesn't fall over my eyes"

"Your wish is my command" Marinette giggled and made a little reverence

"May I quote you on that?" Chat lift both brows and a smirk appeared on his face

"On the haircut" Marinette rolled her eyes "And if someone's wishes are command, those are mines"

"Why would that be?"

"Because I'm a princess, remember?" Marinette winked at him

"Yes, you are" Adrien looked at her reflection with adoration. How he wished they could be like this when he was himself; but till Marinette didn't felt comfortable around him he only had this moments and he treasured them dearly.

Marinette took off one of the bobby pins and once again she swirled blonde pieces of hair in between her middle and index finger, this time extending it to the side, tensing it. She took the scissors and in a swift motion she cut the first section.

"How was your day?" Marinette asked as she repeated her moves with another section of hair

"Had lunch with friends" Adrien answered, he couldn't tell much of his day without hinting his identity "What about yours?"

"It was… uh… something" Marinette couldn't describe all the emotions that she had felt in one day, she couldn't put into words all the thoughts she had had along the day

"Something? Good or bad?" Adrien asked, he needed to know, after all he had been with her a good amount of time.

"I don't know, it wasn't exactly a bad day, it was just different" Marinette sighed, focused on Chat's hair she kept talking "I'm an intern at _Agreste's_ , and not the intern they use to go for coffee and give memos, no I'm one of the six selected for the real deal

"My princess is talented" Adrien interrupted, a big proud smile on his face

"I guess" Marinette said giggling "Well, being part of that selected groups comes with a lot of benefits besides the working experience, it gives you a chance to be featured in Vogue. Vogue fucking France" She said, looking at the horizon, stars on her eyes "And I don't know how I did it but I made it, I made it to the three interns who are featured and Gabriel Agreste, really likes my designs

"He would be a fool if he didn't, I'm sure he adores you" The last part he said it because he knew it was true. Gabriel Agreste had never looked impressed with any of his son's talents, he always acted as they were just "good enough" but when it came to talented designers, his father couldn't hide the excitement, he always showed it, in his own way, but he did, and Adrien knew his father too well to know that he adored and admired Marinette.

"Thanks for saying that" Marinette gushed, looking to the ground trying to hide the tinge of pink on her cheeks

"Only the truth for you; now go on, want to hear more about your talent" Marinette giggled at that

"Well so, today was the shoot for it, I worked my ass off to be ready for it, I chose the clothes and the models and did at least six different makeup looks for every look; everything was supposed to go perfectly, but of course, this is me we are talking about so my male model didn't show up!" She struggled to keep calm, losing all the focus on the haircut, just looking at Chat's eyes on the mirror "My model's are not that muscular, but they are not bony-skinny as Sébastien's are –oh Sébastien is one of the interns –well so all my plans go to drain, and my best friend and I are freaking out, Gabriel Agreste himself appears at the shoot, something he never does according to Vogue people and he is there trying to help me out, but still everything is a mess and my mind is all over the place, I'm so worried that I can't think straight—" She stopped, taking a big breathe "And out of the blue _he_ appears, all charming and gorgeous and " _don't I look handsome Marinette?"_ and there I stand a blushing mess because of course he looks handsome as hell, but he just makes me feel so weird that I act rude around him because that's my coping mechanism against the feeling, and I'm hoping he goes away but, oh NO! he is there to save the day, all the outfits fit in him, of course they do because I practically got inspired by him!" Marinette shouted, totally forgetting Chat is who she is speaking to. "And then after good thirty minutes of him almost making love to the camera with his sexy eyes, he just ends up being a total nerd! Puns and goofy smiles, ughh! But after that I think I will be totally free of him but guess what? My bad luck strikes again, Alya who never got over her ex-boyfriend drags me to eat lunch with him, and to make things worse I bring my boyfriend!"

"Boyfriend?!" Adrien acted surprised, Marinette never had mentioned her boyfriend to Chat Noir, and also it was a good excuse to give Marinette a break, no matter how much fun Adrien was having with it, and how could he not? The girl was talking about him, she was praising him but she was wishing she didn't and it was hilarious, especially in Adrien's place.

"Oh…" Marinette stopped shouting, a slow turn back to Chat, she didn't realize she had started to walk in circles around the room "Y-yeah, I have a boyfriend"

"Uhm" Was Chat's only answer

"I'm I boring you? I'll shut my mouth and go back to your haircut" Marinette asked, realizing how annoying must she been right now

"No, no, princess, I'm really enjoying your story, I love hearing about your day and about this guy"

"Ugh" Marinette growled as she continued to cut pieces of hair angrily"That guy is driving me crazy, because I feel strange one moment and then the other is calm and there's certain peace around me, but seconds pass and I'm uncomfortable again and I feel so bad, he is really nice and a good person, you cannot unseen it and there I am being all mean to him… I am a mess"

"No, you are not" Chat shifted back to comfort her

"Hey! Take care, I got scissors, remember?" Marinette said, taking a step back with the scissors far away from both of their faces

"I know you wouldn't hurt me, not even unintentionally" Chat smiled in answer

"You trust me that much?" Marinette smirked, her previous irritation vanishing.

"I'll trust you with my life, princess" And he meant it.

"You are ridiculous" She rolled her eyes but at the same time started laughing; she felt really wonderful, she hadn't feel this way in years and what make that happiness that special was the fact that just seconds ago she was feeling really down, and a few words from him changed her mood in 180°.

"You are beautiful"

"Hey" Marinette blushed, dodging the look he was giving her.

"Since we were saying facts…" Chat walked near her, near enough to be able to rub her arm with tenderness. Marinette laughed again, this time a nervous giggle. "Another fact: your laugh… I love it, I missed it"

"Enough about me, now tell me about your day and let me end with your cut" Marinette said, most like she ordered

"I had lunch with friends, I told you"

"Is that what got you in such a bad mood earlier?"

"No… I just heard a few news I didn't like"

"Work related?"

"No, miraculously that's the only steady thing in my life right now" He rolled his eyes "No surprises, I already know the teachers and students are predictable too, same old, same old"

"Students?" Marinette's face lighted up "You are a teacher?!"

"Yeah, why the enthusiasm?" He asked interested

"That's so sweet! I never pictured you as a teacher"

"And how did you imagine me, princess?" Adrien flashed her with a toothy grin

"A model" She teased

"Well, I got the look, don't I?" He smirked

"I'm not answering that, I boosted your ego enough already" Marinette answered

"Oh, but my dear princess—" the sound of a ring interrupted Chat's words. Marinette and he turned in direction to the front door.

"I guess I have to go" Chat said, one hand behind his head, rubbing his neck

"You _can't_ go. I have to finish your cut, if you go now you are gonna look like a mess"

"But—

"Just hide" Marinette pointed at her room "Close the door, I'll tell you when to come out"

Chat Noir nodded and did exactly what he was told, entering the small yet cozy room of Marinette. It was decorated in the same style as the rest of the apartment, soft colors and harmonic furniture. The bedroom counted with a nice double bed with a delicate steel backrest painted in white, the bed was full of cushions in different pink and purple tones. At the side of the bed there was a matching night stand, a candle and a few books were displayed there. The walls had a lot of pictures and mood boards, designs hanging on a cork panel and a hanging glass planter with fake peonies on it.

Adrien smile, he remembered Marinette's old room, and while that one was completely different to this one, they both were a loyal image to Marinette's soul. He was enchanted by the lovely pieces of herself, so concentrated in them till his cat sense's caught the voice of the visitor.

The first thought that raced over Marinette's mind at opening the door was not the thought that should appear when you saw your boyfriend.

"Bonsoir, ma belle" Nathanaël ducked down to leave a sweet kiss on Marinette's lips. He looked down at Marinette's clothe and raised a brow in confusion "Are you going for a run?"

"Uh… I was doing one of those yoga videos on YouTube" Marinette lied

"Yoga? Since when you are into that?" He asked, making his way into Marinette's apartment

"It was a stressful day, Alya suggested it

"It worked for Alya?" Nathanaël chuckled

"No" Marinette smiled too "But she said it might help me"

"Did it?" He asked, leaning into her. His arms rubbing her shoulders, his mouth tracing a line from her cheeks down her jaw

"A little. How did all went down in the office? What was the problem?"

"Oh, there was a mistake in one of the panels of the upcoming comic, we had to stop the production and fix it; good thing is that we realized it quickly

"Isn't that a problem for the ones who print it?

"Yes and no, it's mostly us, since without the right panel they can't print

"Right" Marinette nodded "So what brings you here?"

"You?" Nathanaël asked confused

"Yeah, I know, but we didn't said anything

"I'm not allowed to visit my own girlfriend just because?

"Of course you can" Marinette crossed her arms around his neck and smiled "I'm just tired, was thinking on going to bed now"

"Well I can make you company" He said kissing the curve in between her jaw and her neck

Marinette had no idea what to say next; she didn't have a good and credible excuse to tell him to go, but he needed to go, Chat Noir was hidden in her room and while he could easily escape using her bedroom window, Marinette didn't wanted him to go.

So Marinette just pretended that everything was alright and hugged Nathanaël back, leading him to the sofa.

"I missed you" Her boyfriend said in a sweet whisper against her ear. Starting to leave a line of kisses across Marinette's neck and face, ending up in her lips; he took her mouth with his, Marinette trying to follow the kiss, but miserably failing at the attempt. While Nath was all sweetness and love, she was thinking in the hidden boy in her room. It was uncomfortable for her to know that Chat Noir, a guy she had been thinking a lot lately was only a door away, probably listening to her make out session. Yeah that wasn't a good thought to have, but it was a reality for her so it was worse.

"Marinette, what's wrong?" Nathanaël stopped kissing her abruptly, still very close to her, looking straight to her eyes

"Nothing is wrong" _I'm such a liar_

"You are tense and acting weird. There's obviously something wrong"

"What could be wrong? I'm just tired, I told you, it was a harsh day"

"Mmm..

"What does that suppose to mean?" Marinette was in no position to get defensive, but she did it anyways

"Mari… you have been acting weird for months, but lately your weirdness and awkwardness around me has exceed its levels. I'm worried

"I told you it was nothing…

"But I don't believe you and you don't believe it either

"You are overreacting, I'm just tired" Lies, lies, lies.

"'I'm not" He said in a steady tone "It's about Adrien, isn't it?"

"WHAT?!" Marinette shouted. And at the other side of the door a superhero was surprised and confused too.

Adrien, who had been too busy fighting with Marinette's cat (after being surprised; Marinette had a cat? A black cat? Since when?) who made pretty obvious that he didn't wanted the cat-boy around, but now Adrien had pressed his ear to the door to pay more attention to the conversation, a conversation he knew wasn't meant to be heard by him, but what could he do? He was already there and they were going to talk about _him_.

"I'm asking if it has to do with Adrien, Marinette"

"Yes I get that, what I don't get is how is he related to the subject we are discussing"

"Well, because—"And then he stopped. Adrien wasn't looking but he knew Marinette had her hands on her hips and was surely frowning.

"Well because?" Marinette repeated

"You are sure you don't remember him?"

"Why would I lie about it? Have I ever lied about what I remember and what I do not?"

"No" Nathanaël answered in a gasp "But this is Adrien we are talking about…

"And I still don't get it, because I don't remember, so tell me why

"But you don't like when –

"I know, but if you are going to put the blame of my feelings on him I would like to know why"

"Really?

"Really" She stated

"You had the biggest crush on Adrien, Marinette"

Marinette's eyes opened also did her mouth making a low little "pop". She let her arms fall at her side and let all the air out of her lungs

"I had a crush on Adrien Agreste?!" She asked mortified and if she hadn't screamed so loud she would have been able to hear Chat Noir talking to himself just as shocked "Marinette had a crush on me?!"

"What was that sound?" Nathanaël asked

"What sound?" Marinette asked back agitated

"I swear I hear something coming from your room"

"Ah, it must be Ad—" Marinette stopped, hitting her forehead with the palm of her hand "It must be the cat, ugh"

It was a good thing that Nathanaël believed her, but that didn't end up the discussion

"Look, Mari, I just want to know what is going on and I'm trying to connect the dots that I get… I'm sorry if upset you but I'm on my right to know what is going on with my girlfriend

"Again, I'm just tired. Can we talk about this at any other time?" Marinette pinched the bridge of her nose

"Okay, I'm going home" Nathanaël said with notorious anger on his voice

Marinette walked him to the door, Nathanaël left a chaste kiss on her lips and left the apartment.

Marinette closed the door, reclining against it she sighed in relief; relief that didn't last long when she remembered about Chat Noir.

"Chat, you can go out!" She shouted

The door of her room opened and two black cats ran off her it.

"Your cat hates me" Chat Noir said to her, a tender smile on his face

"You don't have to pretend you didn't hear a thing of what just happened"

"Okay, because it was going to be hard"

"Tell that to me" Marinette rolled her eyes "This is unbelievable" Marinette kneeled to the ground and caught her cat on her arms

"I'm sorry that you fought with your boyfriend, but in the bright side now you have a piece to understand your feelings for Adrien Agreste"

"Ugh, please don't" Marinette squeezed her eyes "I had a crush on him? I can't believe it"

"Well you said yourself he was handsome" Chat grinned

"But I don't want to think about it!" Marinette shouted "God damn, my cat is named Adrien!"

Chat Noir couldn't resist the big burst of laughter

"You have a black cat named Adrien!" He said as he caught air

"Don't laugh at me! My subconscious is a bitch" Said between pursed lips

"Oh, princess, you surely know how to turn a rainy day into a warm summer day"

"You are so over the top" She rolled her eyes

"But you adore me"

"Yeah, I think I do" She smiled "Let's go back to that haircut before I lose my mind for the third time in one night

"Okay, is Adrien gonna make us company?"

"Oh, I wouldn't tease the person who has the power to make you look like a mess"


	10. In Which Gabriel Gives Clues

Marinette had make up her mind last night. She couldn't keep lying to herself or to others, she hated lies, she hated them so much, she couldn't become a liar, that was just despicable.

But hating lies didn't make it any easier to say the truth, not when the truth could hurt someone; so as she worked on the last details of a night gown, adding little details of _pedrería_ to the black dress, she also was working on her speech.

 _It's not you, it's me_ , was a phrase she had to avoid at all costs. But how did you say that without saying that? Because that was exactly what was wrong; Marinette didn't feel the same and it wasn't Nath's fault, it was all her, she felt different about herself, about the world and about the relationship. She loved him so much but being in a relationship with him wasn't what she wanted anymore, her heart had changed paths, she had to be honest about it.

"Marinette" Sébastien appeared at her workspace, two big pieces of different fabrics on hand

"What's wrong?"

"Burgundy chevron?" He pointed at the fabric on his left "Or mulberry Peau de Soie?"

"Sometimes I wonder if you choose the colors and fabrics by their names and not its uses" Marinette laughed "What kind of gown you have in mind?"

"It's for a wedding dress, she didn't want white, wanted something fresh, something unique; I'm thinking of a big mermaid skirt but somehow incorporate a long tail on it… but I don't want it to look that heavy, ugh, this is hard" He clenched his teeth "Look I have no idea where I'm going with this, I'm the edgy couture one, wedding dress have never been my thing"

"Gabriel is testing you" Marinette said "I know you have it on you, stop thinking about what you know of wedding dresses, she wants unique, give her unique… but if I can give a little advice, keep the chevron but change the colors, they are too dark for a wedding"

"What do you suggest?"

"Maybe lavender or periwinkle if you want to stay in the purple side" Marinette smiled at him

"Would you wear a periwinkle wedding dress?"

"No, I'm a classic girl, but I can appreciate a periwinkle dress"

"Everyone should be classic, in my humble opinion a wedding dress is not a wedding dress if it's not white" Sébastien said as he flicked the blue spikes of his hair

"It's a wedding dress if you wear it at a wedding" Marceline said, appearing at Sébastien's side

"Aren't you hilarious?" Sébastien rolled his eyes

"The most hilarious human on Earth" Marceline nodded "Did you finish, Mari?"

"I'm almost done, is the model already here?"

"No, but Mr. Agreste wants you at his office after you are done"

"Did he say why?"

"Not really, but maybe is about yesterday's photoshoot"

"Why would you think that?" Sébastien asked instead of Marinette

"Well, tall, blonde and handsome was there too"

"Really?! Why don't I get invited to Mr. Agreste office then?" Sébastien said surprised

"I don't think you are his type" Marceline winked at him

"What are you talking about? Don't you remember the scandal he caused four years ago? Pictures of him and his boyfriend were everywhere"

"He may be bisexual, but still you are not his type" Marceline said

"I don't remember that" Marinette said, winning two pair of eyes to look at her amused "C'mon, not because of the memory lost, but I just don't recall being invested in Adrien Agreste's life"

"He seems pretty invested in yours" Marceline pointed out "I hear Madame Sacreour yesterday at the shoot, she couldn't believe Adrien had just volunteered, she said you must be really special"

"Oh, he is totally into her!" Sébastien said in a sigh that came with a sad expression on his face

"He is not into me, he is just an old friend… I didn't remembered him, but obviously, he remembers me"

"How many famous friends do you have?" Sébastien raised a brow "Your best friend is a renamed journalist, and yesterday teen heartthrob Adrien Agreste and the DJ of the moment appear at your shoot just to say hi"

"I met them in school, and Nino and Adrien are not my friends anymore, they haven't been in my life for six years or so…"

"Marinette" Nathalie interrupted the conversation, making the three of them quite at the second she said the words

"Madame Sacreour" The three of them said

"Mr. Agreste wants you in his office, you two should come too" The designers nodded and followed Nathalie out of the room

Sébastien was doing a little joy dance as they did and Marceline and Marinette were trying not to laugh at it.

Adrien's eyes had a shadow on them, something was bothering him and he couldn't hide it, his face showed a mixture of sadness and anger that made Marinette tremble. She didn't remember a thing about Adrien Agreste, but somehow she knew that that wasn't an expression to usually appear on his perfect face, and it made her want to know what bothered him and fix it so his fuller lips could be curved in a smile again.

 **xx**

 _Earlier that day…_

"Your father will be waiting for us at his office" Those were Nino's first words as he walked across the front door of his best friend apartment.

Adrien, who was still wearing pajama pants, lying on the couch with a sleeping cat kwami on his abs, hadn't been pleased at all; not when he was eating a box of donuts by himself, something he wasn't allowed for years, as he remembered every moment of the past night, every moment of his time with Marinette.

Adrien ignored him, maybe he would go away

"Adrien, we have a meeting with your father, you can't avoid this forever"

Maybe he didn't have much luck

"I'm busy" Adrien said "I have to go to class"

"According to your father you only have one class today, at 5, I think we got time"

"Whoa, when did you and my father became friends?"

"We are more like… business partners" Nino said "Now get up and take a shower, we have to be on time"

"We were having fun!" Plagg said, still half sleep on top of Adrien

"Yeah, we were having fun! The Nino I know would never say no to fun"

"Sometimes responsibilities come first, and the Adrien I know, comprehended that"

"Ugh" Adrien hide his face on the pillow next to him, muffling his voice "I'm not ready for this"

"You will never be ready, that's why we are doing it as soon as possible, so you can get over it"

"Alright… you know I had a really nice evening and was having a wonderful morning, you will pay for this"

"You'll thank me later, so you don't scare me. Now get up!"

"Damn, one night with Alya and you are a bossy pants" Adrien stood up off the coach, making Plagg jump sacred at the fast move "Talking about that, how was your night?" Adrien smirked

"Very informative" Nino smirked back "How was yours?"

"Good"

"Only good?" Nino raised a brow "There are pictures of you and Miss Vigilante all around the internet"

"She cut my hair" Adrien said, shaking his blonde locks "I look pretty fantastic, uh?"

"I think is still too long for your father to like, good think we are going to be discussing other things that don't' relate to your hair"

"You can't let it go, don't you?"

"No" Nino stated "Now hurry, if you are lucky you may get to see Marinette"

"As an amazing motivation that is, I'm still taking as long as I can in the shower" Adrien said as he made his way to the bathroom.

 **xx**

Adrien didn't get to see Marinette. He walked, on propose, outside of the interns work stations and Marinette was nowhere to be found. He wanted to see her, he wanted her to compliment his hair, he wanted to see that beautiful smile of hers.

But he didn't see her, she didn't bright up his day and now he was standing in front of his father. He looked as he always did, elegant suit, bright and unique tie, expressionless face; yeah, till Nino head up to him and shook his hand, then something similar to a smile flashed through Gabriel's lips

"Come in, we have a lot to talk about" He said, and then leaned to his son to pat his shoulder as a sign of affection.

Nino and Adrien walked inside the luminous office and sat on the couch close to the coffee table.

"Well, where should we begin?" Gabriel asked

"How much do you know?" Adrien asked immediately, apparently they weren't going to run in circles this time

"More than you could imagine Adrien or should I say Chat Noir?" Gabriel smirked which made Adrien nervous

"He knows?!" Adrien asked, thought he felt stupid asking it, of course he did

"Yeah, I told you he knew a lot" Nino said

"I got that part, I just thought I was going to reveal myself or something" Adrien gasped "Did Nino told you or you figure it out by yourself?"

"I have known for years" Gabriel said, his fingers intertwined as he looked at his son with an expression Adrien couldn't quite figure out "Missing classes, Nathalie couldn't reach for you at times, your behavior at akuma attacks and the ring, obviously, gave it away"

"But you were never there how—

"Adrien you don't get your obliviousness from me" Gabriel interrupted, raising his brows.

"You never said a thing and you… never stopped me" Adrien was really confused. If his father, the same person who had forbidden him to go to public school because it was "dangerous", hadn't stopped him from being a superhero who constantly put himself at risk, then the world as he knew it was a complete lie

"I knew I wouldn't have been able to stop you, you are just like your mother"

At the sound of that word, Adrien stiffed, giving a look at Nino to find comfort. Nino was smiling at him, trying to keep him out of panic.

"Sh-she… she was a…" Adrien's voice died down, he couldn't remember the last time he and his father had had a conversation about his mother. They had little conversations about her on days like her birthday or mother's day; sometimes when a police officer called to say that they had a lead, but they were tiny conversations, filled with memories or hopeless words, a conversation with crucial information like this one hadn't happen in years.

"She was a Miraculous holder, the peacock to be exact" Gabriel said "Difference to you she wasn't chose so young, she became a hero when she was eighteen, and she was absolutely fantastic"

"You knew her before that?" Adrien asked, he knew their parents had met at a young age, but he didn't knew the details

"Only a few months, I worked at a coffee shop to help my parents pay university, and she happened to go there every day, we became very good friends and after a while she revealed herself to me" That was the most information Adrien had heard his father give in like, forever.

He turned to look for Nino just to realize he was gone. He was expecting for him to do it, but not so soon.

"So you didn't know anything about the Miraculous till mom told you about it"

"Exactly" Gabriel nodded "I start to know and investigate to help her; I met Master Fu, who I'm aware you were acquainted, and helped with researches, mostly because it was fund and I got to spend more time with Céline, but then it became something really interesting to know"

"So you probably knew I was Chat Noir at the moment the ring was on my hands" Adrien sighed

"No, I did not, it took me more time that it should have if I'm being honest" Gabriel admitted "But when I discovered it, as scared as I was, it made sense to me, you are jut like your mother, of course you would be chosen"

Adrien smiled at that.

"You seem to know a lot"

"I don't know enough" His dad clapped back "Before your mother disappeared we were trying to figure it out a code, and once she was gone I have been trying to find more clues to decipher said code, but I haven't find what I need. Sadly that research has been put on pause, once your friend, the new Big Guardian called for help, I have been doing my best to search for Ladybug"

"Really?!" Adrien's heart stop. His father was looking for Ladybug!

"Yes, I don't have much but I have a few pieces of information that could be useful" He said, he made a sign for Adrien to follow him to his desk

Gabriel opened the third drawer on his desk and took an old book of it. Adrien recognized immediately

"Hey" Adrien said, not sure what to say

"Master Fu gave it back once he thought you two wouldn't ask about it anymore" He explained "Stop trembling, I'm not gonna ground you for something you did almost ten years ago"

"I freaked out when I lost that book, you know? When I found out Ladybug had took it I was relieved and then I couldn't take it back anyways, it's a burden you know?" The closest thing to a laugh came out of his father's lips

"I can imagine" Gabriel nodded "This book is really important as you already know, it has essential information of the Miraculous and its holders. By years of stud I managed to decode it all, and I understand most of it. The sad events of your mother's disappearance helped me a lot when it came to figure it out about Ladybug's"

"What did you found?"

"I already explained this to your friend Nino, so don't worry we are not leaving him behind" He said as Adrien turned and pointed at the door. He continued when Adrien nodded "Wayzz felt an energy coming from the butterfly Miraculous and as we all seem to agree is connected to Ladybug's miraculous as well. I have studied the butterfly stone, its Kwami gives powerful abilities, not only it changed and controls people as you saw when you fought akumas, it gives the holder the power of feeling other's people's feelings, they feel the world around them in a bold way that no one else does"

"That's how Papillon could know when someone was a good target" Adrien said surprised "It makes so much sense"

"Yes, exactly; it's powers are big, and while Papillon used them to control people it also work in different ways. The magic on it, when not used in other's can be used to get what you want"

"What do you mean? I don't understand"

"I haven't been able to understand it well myself, but the powers of the miraculous can give you what you want, the closest example I have is a genie in a lamp. The power of the stone can make your wishes come true, but it's too powerful and it dries the kwami's energy fast, so it's hard to use, no one has heard of anyone use it so it's hard to tell"

"How are you so sure?"

"I'm not, it's only what I have found on my research, but it's the only lead you have"

"Yeah" Adrien sighed but then something clicked on his head "You are suggesting that Ladybug tried to use those powers?"

"Yes" Gabriel walked closer to the window, not looking at Adrien. He knew how much Ladybug meant to his son, and was afraid to say anything, after all he had seen him suffer, he had seen him panic, all because the power of said miraculous "I think Ladybug tried to use it, and that something came out wrong"

"But what?!"

"That's what we are trying to find out, aren't we?"

Adrien sighed, he shook his head and then covered his face with his hands

"I miss her" Adrien admitted "The both of them… I know we will find them, I have never lost hope on mom, and now I'm not losing hope on my Lady"

"Neither am I, Adrien, I can assure you that" And that was an I love you coming from Gabriel Agreste, so Adrien leaned for a hug.

Gabriel accepted his hug but it didn't last long, Adrien wasn't expecting that either.

"We'll talk more about this once we get information for your reporter friend"

"Alya" Adrien said "Is she really going to help? I adore Alya, she is great and super smart but does she know the stuff we need?"

"We don't know what she knows" Gabriel said "I know you are worried and want big information at your door right in this moment, but the best way to do this is slow and taking every clue we can get, even if it's little"

"You are right"

"I usually am" Gabriel smirked "Now, change of subject, Vogue is really please with yesterday's photoshoot"

Of course he had to bring that up

"I'm glad, do Marinette's clothes look good?"

"They are brilliant so they look brilliant" Adrien felt proud.

"There's going to be a party for the launch of the edition, since you are in the edition it would be fantastic if you made an appearance, they sent you an invitation"

"I don't know that, it's not my scene anymore… the whole model thing was to save Mari, just that"

"Marinette will be there, it really would be sad if you missed her" Her father said, standing by his side

"Father" Adrien coughed nervously

"Do I have to repeat you that I'm not the oblivious parent you thought I was? Also anyone can notice that you are interested in her, after all those other partners you had is good to see you have some taste"

Adrien decided to ignore the comment of his old relationships, at first he thought Gabriel had something against his boyfriends, because they were, well, boys, but at the end it was Gabriel being Gabriel, because his behavior didn't changed much when he had a girlfriend around; he had decided what was good for his son, and that was the only thing that could make him happy.

"You like her a lot" Adrien said back

"She is very talented, a girl with feet on the ground and a natural leader" Gabriel nodded

"I know" Adrien couldn't help but smile at the words, they were so true, he was so happy that his father could see it

"You should ask her out, you two would make a wonderful pair"

"How long have you been waiting to tell me that?" Adrien smirked

"High school?"

"High school?!" Adrien almost shocked on air "What?"

"After the derby hat competence I told Nathalie to keep an eye on her, when you spoke about her it was only nice things. Nathalie investigated about her, and I got to see her a few times at your photoshoots. See? I _do_ pay attention. Anyways it was more about her career than anything, but once she started working for me, I knew she was the one for you"

"Dad" Adrien picked the neck of his shirt and leaned his head to the side

"What are you going to say to me, Adrien? You obviously like the girl"

"She doesn't remember me" Adrien said "You know about her accident, right?"

"Yes, I am aware of the situation, I have known about it since the first day she crossed my office door"

"You never said a thing to me"

"I figure it out that I would have heard of Marinette's accident before that moment if you still kept contact with her"

"Yeah, I guess" Adrien mumbled "I think it won't hurt me to go"

"Perfect" As he said that, there was a knock on his door "Perfect time. Come in!"

"Your interns are here, Mr. Agreste" Nathalie said and two girls and a boy came in.

Adrien recognized the girl and the boy from yesterday's shoot, but his sight stayed on Marinette; she was looking at him. She looked worry, which made Adrien worry.

"Thanks for coming. Mademoiselle Béraut and M. Pascal I need you to call one of your models from yesterday's shooting and confirm them for the event at Vogue. Just that you can go, now" Marceline and Sébastien only got time to nod before they were out of the door "Marinette…"

"Sir" Marinette said, her sight turned away from Adrien to his dad

"Remember that suit you designed, the onyx one with hints of arctic silver?

"Yes, I do" Marinette answered

"Do you think you can bring it to life in a week?" Adrien looked at his father, the tone of his voice suggested he already knew the answer

"Yes, I can. A sample or for someone in specific?"

"For Adrien" Gabriel pointed and Adrien flinched in surprise "He will go with you to the Vogue Launch, the editors loved you and they loved my son in your clothes, it's a good strategy to put your clothes in the spotlight

"Father I don't think Marinette needs me to do so" Adrien said mad

"Is not that" Marinette said to Adrien "We are all going with a model, right? That's what you told Sébastien and Marceline to call their models. Not all the editors will remember the clothes, some of them will be more interested in the models, so if you go with me, wearing one of my designs they will ask about them

"Exactly" Gabriel asked "As always, you are brilliant"

"Thank you, sir" Marinette smiled at him

"Okay, both can go, Marinette has a suit to make" Marinette nodded and turned to the door

"I'll talk to you later" Adrien said to his father before running to catch Marinette, across the door and to the hallway.

"I need measures for your pants" Marinette said when she felt him closer

"Okay" He agreed. He started walking closer to her, he put his hands on his pocket so he didn't accidentally touch her, it was an habit as Chat Noir but not as Adrien

"Are you okay?" Marinette asked

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know, you seem… off" Marinette stopped in the hallway looking directly at him "I know I haven't been the sweetest but you can talk to me if you need to"

"I'll keep that in mind" He was glad she had said that, he had an excuse for another time. He passed his fingers through his hair as he smiled to her

"Did you cut your hair?" Marinette couldn't stop herself to ask that, the slow motion of his fingers on his hair had make her notice

"Uh yeah…" Adrien smirked "Don't I look good?"

"I guess" Marinette had to really focus on not stuttering. Of course he looked fantastic, he was gorgeous

"I'll tell my stylist, she is the best" Adrien laughed, and Marinette didn't understood why.

 **xx**

 **So, now we finally caught with the AO3 version :)**

 **Thank you for all of your reviews, you are all very kind!**

 **Also wanted to remind that english is not my first language, I'm sorry for any mistakes and I always take constructive critic ! xx**


	11. In Which Nino and Alya Talk

**PART TWO: ANSWERS**

"Lahiffe; Nino Lahiffe" He repeated for the tenth time to the secretary at the front desk

"Lahiffe" She repeated to the phone she was holding "How do you spell that, honey?"

Nino rolled his eyes and sighed

"L-A-H-I-F-F-E" He spelled, he was about to lose his mind "Just tell her my name, she knows who I am"

The secretary looked him down as she spelled Nino's last name to the person at the other side of the phone.

Nino was really mad at her; he understood that she could be tired, and maybe a little stressed, after all Alya was her boss and he knew Alya too well, he knew how stressful she could be. Also it was almost eight thirty, it was obvious that she wasn't supposed to still be there, but the pile of papers on her desk told Nino enough to understand why she was still chained to the office. Still it didn't give her any right to judge him and look at him like he was an annoyance.

"Okay, Mr. Lahiffe" The woman said "She will be waiting for you in her office"

Nino smiled back at the secretary just to be polite, something that after many years of being in the public eye just came natural. He never acted rude or mean around paparazzi, journalists or reporters, he preferred to brush them off being polite than an insufferable jerk. If he was nice then the paparazzi tended to be nice, as nice as they could be, of course.

Nino was glad that the paparazzi population was minor in Paris than in LA. He had been hunted a few times. now that the word that he was in the city had spread, but nothing compared to LA, and being able to transform into a superhero was always a plus for his escapades. A plus that he hadn't been able to put in practice today, the paparazzi chased him like crazy today, if he alone got followed, to go for a walk with Adrien Agreste and Chloé Bourgeois didn't help.

So right now he needed to be calm, once he got rid of the group who was chasing him he finally made it to the place he wanted to be.

Nino took the elevator and pushed the button to the eight floor and waited for it to lift for what it seemed like an eternity. He really wanted to see Alya. Especially because it felt like she was ignoring him.

That night a week ago where they had hang out together, where they had spoke about almost everything that time let them, joked around and watched some movies, Nino thought it would be a good idea to ask her about Ladybug, after all there wasn't a time when Alya didn't wanted to talk about Ladybug, and indeed she had talked but she only told him lies. Alya was good at creating stories, she was fantastic at giving stories more color and action, Nino gave her that, but lies? Lies were here Achilles' heel.

After that Alya had been distant, barely acknowledging his existence and replying to his texts a day later, if she replied at all. Something was off and he wanted, no, he needed to know why.

The elevator reached the floor and the doors opened, Nino crossed the doors and walked down the hall at the speed of light, stopping only at the front of a glass door. Behind that glass door you could see her, with her feet on top of her desk, her laptop on her lap and her hands moving fast as she typed down on the keyboard. Also there was a younger girl with big curly hair inside the office, and she was looking directly at him, her mouth wide open and excitement on her eyes.

Nino waved and smiled at her, pointing out at the doorknob as he shrugged, trying to make his question only with those movements.

The girl nodded and ran to the door, opening just seconds later

"H-hello" She stuttered as she let him in "Mademoiselle Césaire—

"If you are going to act like a doorman, you gotta let me know there's someone before you open the door, girl" Alya smiled at the girl and then to Nino "Charlene I present you Monsieur Lahiffe. Monsieur Lahiffe this is my intern Charlene" She teased as she smirked at him

"Nice to meet you, Charlene, is this workaholic keeping you for going out like a normal young adult? I wouldn't be surprised" He teased back

"N-no, she is gre-at, I want t-to be here" Charlene answered, she was playing with her hands and smiling nervously, it remind him of how Marinette acted around Adrien years ago

"Yeah, but he is right, you should take a break" Alya left the laptop on her desk and jumped out of her chair "Go home, Charlene"

"Sure, Mademoiselle Césaire" She nodded at her and then turned once again to Nino "It was a meet you to pleasure, I mean a pleasure to meet you" She shook her head and ran out off the office

Nino and Alya laughed

"Got yourself another Mari, Mademoiselle Césaire?" Nino chuckled

"I can't get her to call me Alya and the stutter it's a new thing, she is a fan, Monsieur Lahiffe"

"Next time I'll give her an interview" Nino flashed a smile

"Bet you will" She sighed "Enough formalities, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you" He simply stated

"Really?" Alya raised her brow at him and Nino couldn't help but smile wider

"Yeah, why wouldn't I? In fact I would be the one who should ask something like that, since it seems that you've been ignoring me"

"Me?! Ignoring you? What are you talking about?" Alya said and sighed almost immediately, the face Nino had made was enough for her to lose it "I'm so bad at this"

"Lying? Yeah, the worst, especially when you try to lie to me" Nino shook his head as he gave a little laugh "Yet you've been lying to me a lot lately"

"That's not true" Alya put her hands on her hips and leaned forward to him

"It is true, you are lying to me" Nino said

"Whoa, we are not playing around here, uh? Straight to the point"

"I know how much you despise when people aren't straight forward"

"Well, yeah, still you could have been more subtle about it"

"Why would I? I know you are lying, you know about what you are lying, without any words we know about we are talking about, why would I go around other things when I can discuss what I came to discuss?"

"I thought you wanted to see me" Alya said between her teeth

"I wanted to" He assure her, because it was true that he needed to talk to her, as a miraculous holder he needed the information Alya was hiding, but his desire to see her was bigger than anything else, no matter how selfish that was to Adrien and the others.

"I don't believe you" Alya said back

Alya walked at the opposite side of the room, if he didn't knew her better he would have thought that she was kicking him out. It wasn't the case, Alya wanted to keep talking, but she didn't want to guide the conversation, not just yet.

"I wanted to see you and I wanted to know why did you lie to me, you are not a good liar as I already pointed out and you haven't been subtle by ignoring me" Nino sighed "I asked a lot of questions that night, and I got many lies back, I just want to know why"

"I haven't seen or talked to you in years, Nino" Alya turned around in a fast movement. She had her arms crossed against her chest and a deep frown decorated her face. Alya took off her glassed, placing them on top of her head, she rubbed her eyes and sighed before speaking again "And you come back and it feels like you had never been gone… but you were gone, and we cut connections and as much as I wanted it to be like old times, it's not old times"

"It could be" Nino whispered

"I think there's too many secrets in between us" She whispered back, looking at the ground

Nino narrowed his eyes, Alya was hugging herself but she didn't look sad, she looked nervous maybe even excited… like when she was afraid she could be wrong, yet hopeful because she could be right

"What do you know?" Nino asked, he changed his posture to a more relaxed one so Alya couldn't feel like she was being threatened by his curiosity.

"I know many, many things, you'll have to be more specific"

"What did you figure it out that you won't talk to me anymore?"

Nino took a step forward so he could be in front of Alya. Alya's sight was fixed on the ground, avoiding him at all cost, but Nino kept looking down at her face, hoping she could look up and find his eyes.

Alya could play the tough girl really well, she was strong and independent but she was vulnerable too, a part of her she didn't let many people see, a side that she was afraid to show even to the ones she trusted the most. Nino liked to believe he was in the last category but after her words he wasn't so sure anymore.

"Alya, what do you know?"

"I have no idea what you are talking about, be more specific" She repeated

"I haven't been specific in this whole talk. Why? Because I know that you know what I'm talking about"

"How are you so sure?"

"You can't fool me, _wifi"_ Alya reacted at the nickname "You love talking and theorizing about LB, what did you found out that made you stop doing it around me? What did you figure it out that made you lie to me?"

Alya pursed her lips and wrinkled her nose. And finally she looked up, right into his eyes. And in that moment both knew Alya couldn't keep dodging the question anymore.

Alya took a step backward, leaning against her desk and extended her hand to reach for a black paper folder. As soon as she untied the elastic around it she showed Nino a picture

"One of the reasons I took Charlene is because she has her camera everywhere she goes" She said as he showed him the photography that showed a blurry shadow close to the Seine "And also because she is not afraid to take risks and follow mysterious shadows in the middle of the night" Alya took other picture, this time it wasn't blurry, in fact it was so good quality that Nino was impressed.

The photography showed a man dressed in green, a hoodie over his hair and glasses on his face, on his back a shield in form of a shell. That last description of the suit was only known by Nino, of course, because he was looking at a picture of himself.

"Nice picture" That was the only thing Nino was able to say to Alya, he couldn't lie to her face, but he had to say something.

"Don't play dumb" Alya clenched her hands into fists "You think I wouldn't recognize you? You think I wasn't going to put two and two together?"

Alya stepped forward, standing closer, her nose almost bumping into his, mainly because she was stepping on the points of her feet.

"How?" Nino asked, he was in a point of no return , it made no good to anyone if he lied to Alya, and after all he trusted her, it was lucky that she had figure it out that it was him behind the mask and not someone else

"Appears at the same time you return, and while my pictures are blurry I swear I'm thinking it is you, then you come over to my apartment and have a million questions about Ladybug and you are very invested on the subject, you were never that interested, that was the second warning, and at the other day after our talk, Charlene comes up with these photos" She shook the photos on her hands "Better quality than mines so I can pay attention to the little details, and oh! What is that?" Alya pointed at the picture, right on his neck "Is that a scar? So I zoom the digital picture Charlene gave and bang! A scar in the shape of a thunder! Who else has a scar in the shape of a thunder?"

"Uh, Harry Potter, literally it is his most known feature" Nino answered back winning a frown from Alya "Sorry"

"You got that scar at the last battle against Papillon" Alya whispered, her tone still demanded respect but she was softer when she named the event "It's a different scar, it is purple, a strange bruised scar… Bet your makeup team always hides it"

"Yeah" Nino sighed. He extended his hand to catch Alya's hair in between his fingers, but stopped only a few centimeters from her red colored waves, asking for permission to continue. Alya took his hand in between hers and put it down

"I have my reasons to lie, as well as you have yours"

Silence reigned in between them for long minutes, something that almost never happened in between them; they were both loud and always ready to talk, if they weren't the ones making sound it was something else, being in complete silence was weird for them, which mean that something was really wrong or really important.

Nino was trying to find a way for Alya to talk, but deep down he knew nothing could ever trick her into talking. If Alya was keeping something a secret it would be hard to make her spill the truth, she wasn't good with lies but she was good with secrets.

To get closer to open a secret you had to give a secret.

"Did you ever find out how Chat Noir and Ladybug got their powers?"

"The miraculous?" Alya asked rolling her eyes, as his question was stupid

"But that's not the only thing" Nino said.

He gave a few looks at the office and outside at the other side of the glass door, making sure there was no one around. Once he was sure that him and Alya were the last in the floor, he opened one of the big pockets on his jacket let him give a sign to Wayzz.

The little green kwami flew out of its hide place and stopped right in front of Alya's eyes who were growing in size

"What is that?!" She asked excited, her eyes shining as she had neon signs inside them

"Wayzz, this is Alya, Alya this is Wayzz" He introduced them

"It's nice to finally meet you, Mademoiselle Alya" Wayzz made a little bow at her, Alya giggled

" _Finally meet me?_ You talk about me a lot, don't you Lahiffe?" Alya threw that as a joke but the hope cling to her voice

Nino rubbed the back of his neck and looked away from her, making her laugh

"So what exactly are you and what do you do, little guy?"

"I'm a kwami, I'm the protector of the Turtle miraculous and I'm the reason why Master Nino can transform" Wayzz explained in a calmed tone. Nino wasn't scare of what could he reveal to Alya, he was sure he wouldn't say much, after all he had been in the job for much longer than him.

"Master Nino, you sound important" Alya laughed and pushed Nino on his shoulder as she smirked at him

"I am important" Nino smiled, now he was really relaxed since the tension in between them had fade away.

"Yeah, sure" Alya rolled her eyes "So, how does this all work? How do you become cool?"

"I'm already cool, I just become cooler"

"Keep telling that to yourself, Lahiffe"

"Wanna bet?" Nino raised a brow at the same time she did. He forgot how nice it felt to challenge each other.

Before Alya could come up with a sassy comeback he shouted the words

 _"_ _Wayzz transformez-moi!"_ And then he was in costume in front of a shocked Alya.

" _Oh mon dieu! Oh mon dieu!_ " Alya gave little jumps on her spot, covering her mouth her hands. She was trying hard to keep her cool but this situation was something that went beyond her control

"So, I guess I win" Nino laughed

"Shut up! _Oh mon dieu!_ This is amazing! Is this how Ladybug and Chat Noir transformed too?"

"Yes, it is a miraculous thing"

"I can't believe this, it's like… oh I can't put it into words" Alya grabbed pieces of her hair and pulled them softly "I can't believe this is happening, little Alya would be losing her mind"

"I'm pretty sure adult Alya is losing her mind too, she just got better at hiding it" Nino tickled her nose making her flinch away "So how many questions do you have?"

"A million" Alya gasped, not worrying about keeping her excitement a secret anymore

"Alright, but I can't answer everything… and then you'll speak, deal?"

"I'll consider it; give me the basics first" Alya said

Nino knew there was no way that he would win this battle, so he spoke. He told her all the details that he knew wouldn't get him in trouble, he verified a few of her theories along the years and explained her a little bit about how the butterfly miraculous worked, so she could understand the difference between the akumas and it's real power.

But Nino kept all the important information to himself, he knew Alya had more information that she make it seem and if he choose to go into that path he knew he would have to dodge lots of tramps. When Alya wanted something she did almost everything on her power to get it, and Alya was good with words, not only good she was an enchantress, her words became a spell to obtain her goals, Nino knew that, yet he still wasn't immune to them so he had to be careful with his own words.

Alya was in the middle of a question when Nino stopped listening. It was like a fire alarm had started on his mind. Something was wrong.

"Nino?" Alya clapped in front of his face, making him focus on her once again "Something wrong?"

"I think so" Nino admitted "There's a weird energy… something that shouldn't be there"

"Oh" Alya whispered "You have to go" She stated, still sounded as it was a question

"Yes" Nino answered

Nino walked to the windows at Alya's office and opened one, it wasn't hard to get out of here, there was enough tall buildings in this part of the city which made it easier to hide but still move along the rooftops.

"We can have lunch tomorrow… I'm not busy" Alya said from behind "I mean, if you want…"

"I want" Nino nodded, turning to her one more time he noticed she was closer than he had thought

"Goodbye, then" Alya leaned to him, leaving a kiss on the curvature of his lips

"Who says it is goodbye?" Nino smirked at her. "Do you trust me?

"About what?!" Alya squealed

"Do you trust me?" He repeated, extended one hand to her

Alya nodded and took his hand on a strong embrace

"I hope you haven't grown to be scared of heights, _wifi_ "

"I'm not afraid of anything, and you know it"

Nino crossed one arm around her waist, bringing her closer to him. She wrapped her arm around his neck, and they were off. Jumping across rooftops, admiring the Parisian night sky.

 **xx**

Nights on Paris were rarely dark, after all the city of lights wasn't just a romantic name, it was a reality. But in a city with so many lights there are also many shadows, shadows that create dark corners on the streets, corners where people hide, and usually not the good kind.

Citizens knew that well, on the other side tourists were blinded by the beauty of the city to remember that it wasn't a magical place, it was just a city as any other, and just as any other city, crime could be found just around the corner.

Marinette knew that, that's why she usually chose the bad neighborhoods and patrolled over their rooftops, she kept eyes wide open and all her senses were focused and looking for a sign of trouble, but today she was failing at that. Her mind was somewhere else and her heart ached at the memories that kept playing over and over again.

Break ups were hard.

If _she_ was feeling devastated, she didn't wanted to know how Nath was dealing with it.

That evening at the café he was wearing a smile, the lovely and sweet smile he always wore when he was around her. A smile that was like a lullaby for Marinette, a lullaby that she didn't deserve to hear anymore.

Nathanael was one of the best things that had happened to Marinette, he supported her and helped her through the hard times, he was the best person she had ever met and she loved him so much. Yeah, she still loved him, with every piece of her heart and soul but she wasn't in love with him anymore; to stay on a relationship with him was selfish for both of them so Marinette had ended things.

The conversation had been nice and mature, Marinette explained everything she could and made sure to point that the reasons behind her decision were all related to her and nothing to do with her finding someone else. She told the truth and exposed all her feelings, after all their relationship was build in honesty and love, both things were very important to her and to end the relationship without any of those factors was just wrong.

As she expected, Nathanael had been respectful of her decision and her feelings, and he agreed with many things that Marinette had said. He talked about his feelings and his worries too, and thought he had been sad he kept composure and gift her smiles the whole time, those smiles that made her so calm and at peace, those smiles that she loved so much.

She sighed. The break up was amicable and maybe that was one of the factors that made the pain worst. They decided to stay as friends, both of them knew that it would take time, after all they had spent four years of their lives together, but they promised to be for each other if anything happened, and Marinette knew he wasn't lying about that and she knew he believed her too.

With all those thoughts, her mind wasn't in the best place and she shouldn't be playing superhero if she wasn't fully aware of her surroundings, she knew that, but at the same time, just being out of the house and on the rooftops made her calm.

Marinette couldn't connect the dots when it came to her need of fighting crime. What was old Marinette doing with her life that chasing bad guys was so satisfying? Why did all of these fights gave her so much peace inside? She knew all those feelings weren't tied to the actual situation, it was the sense of familiarity that made Marinette so happy. The familiarity made Marinette dress up and put on a mask every night.

Marinette had spent running and climbing the top of the houses for two hours and she hadn't run into any crime and maybe that was the reason why Chat Noir wasn't around. Marinette sighed, just the thought of the guy on the black cat suit made her thoughts ten times more complicated.

Marinette hadn't lie when she told Nathanaël that there wasn't any other boy, it was a hundred percent true that she wasn't breaking up with him to date another guy. But it was a truth that questioned in a different way became a lie… which made her percent a total fake. Marinette couldn't stop thinking about Chat Noir, in the late days after the break up as she worked on her designs, as she sewed and she draw, the superhero had spent time with her. He told her stories about him and Ladybug, as requested by her, he cooked for her when she was too busy and made sure that she went to bed at a right time. Their relationship had grown, they had become closer not only as friends but also partners.

She knew she would never be able to replace Ladybug, she didn't want to either, but their partnership against crime was almost as strong, or so Marinette thought.

There were still secrets in between them, most of them were related to Ladybug, Chat didn't say much besides the stories of them and that he missed her; when Marinette tried to ask for his advances on the searching, Chat changed the subject.

She felt sad about that, it seemed like Chat didn't thought of her as trust worthy, not when it came to _his_ lady.

Marinette shook those thoughts away, or at least she tried, because even if they weren't the focus thought on her mind they still were on the second panel, whispering words to her that made her emotions revolve and choose a jealous path.

As she tried to find any other thought to occupy her mind, she stumbled into another complicated aspect of her life: Adrien Agreste.

God damn she hated Adrien Agreste, she hated how nice he was, she hated how much she wanted to laugh around him, she hated how gentle he was, she hated how he looked, she hated how much she liked him and how he was all the opposite of how her sensations made her think he was.

They had spent a few hours together a week ago when she took his measures once again, and they ran into each other outside their doors too a few times too, they had little talks and it was nice. Because Adrien Agreste was nice.

Marinette threw all the air she had on her lungs out, she was so frustrated with herself, she wished her life was easier, but of course not, it had to be a continuous wrecking mess.

The ring of a scream made Marinette get out of her head and focus once again on patrolling, what she was supposed to be doing.

She ran in the direction of the scream, her thoughts still swirling in her head making it hard for her to maintain calm and analyze the situation, things she always did when she ran into a crime scene, but somehow her feelings were suffocating her, it felt like she was drowning on them, and when she saw the owner of the scream she felt like something had explode inside her.

She was so angry, no, not angry, furious. How could someone be so horrible? How could someone be such a monster?

A man was holding a girl against a wall, forcing himself on her as she tried to escape from his grip. The girls shirt was ripped and the man had just hit her trying to shut her up.

Marinette felt so sick at the scene, her emotions collapsed together and a bold sensation took over her.

Without thinking it through, Marinette jumped from the tall building directly to the alley the man had the girl. Only by a miracle Marinette didn't broke a foot or any other bone for the matter, or maybe it was just the adrenaline running through her veins that made it impossible for her to feel any pain.

Marinette took the man from the collar of his shirt and pulled him to the floor with all the strength she had. Thanks to it, the girl the man was attacking also fell, something that surprised her, yet she still managed.

She freed the girl from the man's grip and pushed her away from them

"Go somewhere safe!" Marinette heard herself screaming, something on her voice was off but she didn't have time to give it importance.

When the girl left the alley, Marinette focused once again on the man.

"Let me go!" He shouted trying to push Marinette away

Marinette looked at him and felt fire burn through her body. The look on the man's eyes changed, the fear on them was undeniable

"WHAT ARE YOU!?" He screamed once again but Marinette shut him up fast enough with a punch on his face. And that punch was only the beginning, once she hit him she was unable to stop.

 **xx**

 **there you have :D**

 **also on AO3 as LilaacStars**

 **find me on tumblr : buginettte**


	12. In Which Adrien Goes to The Bakery

It was official: Marinette's old cat hated Adrien.

In the multiple times Adrien had been at her apartment -trying on the suit she was working on for the party- the cat had scratched him in five occasions, tried to bite him on numerous occasions and hissed at him the whole time he had been close to Marinette.

Marinette apologized every time this happened, not understanding why her "adorable" cat was acting that way towards Adrien.

When it came to Chat Noir, the cat seemed to hate him just as he hated his civilian self, the difference here was that Adrien showed the same hate towards the cat. Marinette found that amusing and teased him about it at every chance she got.

So considering his encounters and the recurrent attacks against him, Adrien was very surprised at finding Marinette's cat on top of his kitchen counter, staring at him.

He wasn't expecting that, after a long day of work.

Adrien lifted a brow, confused at the presence of the cat. The animal hissed back.

"He is been there for hours" Nino said, as he stood from the couch and walked towards his friend.

"How did it get here?" Adrien asked without taking his sight of the green feline's eyes.

"I don't know, he was here when I came back. Maybe being here is part of his three part plan of getting you killed, take back Marinette, his name and his honor" Nino chuckled. "There's space for only one Adrien on Marinette's life and he is determinate on winning that spot"

Adrien rolled his eyes at the joke.

"You can't call its real name in front of Marinette; we're not supposed to know"

"Yeah, right, it is only _Chat Noir_ , damn girl can't stop naming her pet after you"

"What can I say? I know how to make an impression" Adrien tried to hide how happy it made him that Marinette was, without knowing it, naming her cat after him, because it meant that there was a part of Marinette that did remembered him and cared about him.

"How was work?" Nino walked to the fridge and took out two cans of beer, throwing one to Adrien.

"A student yelled at me today because he thought I had unfairly grade his work, he ran off me really pissed, I followed him so I could keep an eye on him for let's say twenty minutes before I realized there's no more _Papillon_ and that an akuma wasn't going to show up thanks to me. Besides that my day was fine" Adrien sighed "How it went with my dad?" He asked before taking a sip of the beer.

"I think he is starting to like me, he called me your friend"

"Whoa, process!" Adrien laughed "Any progress related to my lady?"

"Not much, I'm sorry" Nino shook his head.

"But you figured it out something, right? We are running out of time"

"No, Adrien" Nino sighed, he knew how hard was for Adrien to not have any information. Along the week they had put a board with clues and facts they had about Ladybug. The board was displayed in the middle of Adrien's living room, and they added information when they got something. The first day the board had been a mood lifter for Adrien. His father had come and helped them with it (okay, it had only been five minutes but it was better than nothing) and also he and Nino were trying to figure it out a code together, to see if they could get more useful information, so the board had become Adrien's hope on the first days, then it became the reason of Adrien's anxiety; to not see new clues made him nervous, he was desperate for information and when he had a way to visualize what he had, watching the board stay the same was torture. Nino didn't know what would be worse: to keep the board up or to take it down, so he tried keep Adrien as serene as he could. "We have more questions, but that's good because it means we are finding more ways to find her, and when we finally find her she will be fine, I promise"

"You can't promise me that" Adrien sighed but as true as his words were he also smiled, it was good to know Nino was trying to help.

"I can, I have a good feeling about this, Adrien, I promise" He nodded.

"Does your good feeling have anything to do with the information Alya gave you?" Adrien asked.

"No, Alya wasn't very helpful" Nino pouted.

"But you said that—" Adrien stopped talking, his mouth opening big in surprise at the situation that was going on in front of his eyes. Nino followed his gaze, to find cat-Adrien playing with the sleeve of his hoodie "Why does he like you?!"

At Nino's movement, the cat lost the concentration on the sleeve and turned to Adrien, hissed at the blonde and turned around, rubbing his back against Nino's arm.

"This is so unfair! First Marinette remembers you and now the cat loves you, the problem is obviously me!"

"Dude" Nino lowered his glasses as he looked at Adrien in amusement.

"It's not fair" Adrien crossed his arms on front of his chest.

"It's just a cat, calm down. And Mari doesn't remember me, she just knows more because of Alya, and talking about Alya as we were two seconds ago: I said it was informative, not helpful"

"What's the difference?"

"If it had been helpful I would have a lead. It was informative in the sense that I know Alya knows something, the problems is that she won't tell me what it is"

"What are you talking about? She straight up told you that she won't tell you?"

"No, I tried to get information and she just gave me lies, and we both know how bad Alya is at lying, so she must be hiding something big"

"She must" Adrien agreed "Did you try to talk her again?"

"I texted her a while ago, but she keeps ignoring me, I think I will pass by her office, it's my best chance if I want to catch her by surprise"

"Okay" Adrien nodded "So that won't be in a while, right?"

"Right, why? You want to go out?"

"I'm going out with Chloé, would like to join?"

"Sure, why not, an hour won't kill me"

"You know it will be longer than an hour"

"I gotta see Alya today, and you know that my friendship with her is still not in the light side of the force, we are getting there but not quite yet, so an hour is good"

"I guess an hour is better than none" Adrien shrugged "I'm taking this evil cat back to Mari and I'm good to go"

 **xx**

Adrien ringed the bell for the fifth time.

As he held the black cat with one hand, as far from his chest as he could so it wouldn't scratch him (again) he started to knock on the door.

Marinette usually picked up immediately, since she worked in the middle of her living room, she would crawl from her working spot and pull herself together a few centimeters away of the door. He had seen her do it before; she did it every time she had to open the door to the delivery guy for the food they had ordered when he was around as Chat Noir.

She had to be home, he told Chat Noir she would spend all her free time finishing her dress and a suit for the Vogue party. Why wasn't she picking up?

Cat-Adrien jostle on his hand, trying to escape away from him, but Adrien was holding him from his neck fur, which made impossible for the animal to escape.

"C'mon, princess, open the door" He whispered in between his teeth as he rang the bell one more time.

A loud clatter burst inside of the apartment before the door opened, revealing a sleepy Marinette.

"Yeah?" Marinette yawn.

"Y-your c-cat" Adrien stuttered at the vision in front of him.

Marinette's hair hanged loose and messy above her shoulders, spikes of her were jumping out of the darkness, giving her a funny look. The smudged eyeliner above her eye lids and the marks of a blanket on her left cheek were solid proof of Marinette's nap.

Marinette didn't answer. She yawned one more time, shrugging and flexing her neck to the sides as she rubbed her hand against it; making Adrien's attention drift from her face to her clavicle and under.

And that's when Adrien saw it.

A big oval scar in the middle of Marinette's chest, just a few inches above her breasts; it was a smooth perfect oval in a purple hue, it reminded him of Nino's thunder scar on his neck, not because of the shape, since Nino's was irregular and bigger, but the color… scar's could turn purple, but not such a bright shade of purple, Nino's scar had been done with the point of a miraculous weapon, that was the reason of the color and why it hadn't fade away after the miraculous cure… but Marinette's was so smooth, almost like a tattoo on her skin. It was strange, how had he never noticed this scar when it was so prominent?

Now that he thought about it, he had never seen Marinette wearing any t-shirt, dress or blouse with cleavage. Her collar bones and chest were always covered.

The feeling of claws over his skin took him out of his thoughts.

"Damn it! Are you fucking kidding me?!" Adrien turned to the cat on his arms and frowned at it.

Marinette, who had been half sleep at opening the door, was now fully awake and laughing out loud, something Adrien had never seen her do in front of him as a civilian.

"You are laughing at my disgrace, Marinette?"

"I'm sorry" Marinette said in between laughs, trying to cover her mouth.

"You don't look very sorry, Mari" Adrien's lips pursed, he was trying to keep a mad façade but Marinette's laugh was making it really hard "Your little demon wants to kill me and I'm beginning to think that you support his plan"

Marinette covered her face with her hands, peeking through her fingers to see Adrien's face.

"It's just… you cursed and it was so funny" Marinette said still giggling. Adrien couldn't help but give her a big smile.

"You've been throwing me arsenals of bad words and now you are laughing because I said two? _Two?"_ Adrien crooked an eyebrow at her.

"I'm sorry, it is just that I, but then you and you never… it was funny" Marinette didn't give an explanation only the fraction of the phrase she had thought, all interrupted by her laugh.

She looked down to the floor as she took a deep breath, her laughing dying and her cheeks turning bright red.

Adrien didn't understand why it was so funny for her to hear him curse, but it had made her happy, the happiest she had been in front of him and Adrien wasn't going to ruin it with dumb questions to get answers he didn't really need.

"Can you take your little demon back?" Adrien handled the cat to her, giving the black animal a frown of anger.

"Don't call him demon just because he doesn't like you. He is a little angel" Marinette said back. She took cat-Adrien from human-Adrien's hands and hugged him close to her cheek, giving him little kisses as she petted him.

"I think I'll keep demon, he could be descendant of a coven, you know?" Adrien asked and looked at Marinette. Marinette's face showed how confused she was "The hunting witch era? People thought cats were demons that helped the witches?" He wasn't sure why he asked, he knew those facts, he had spent a good amount of time alone on his room when he was a teenager and looking for random facts in history or just random pieces of history of the world was one of his hobbies.

"You are calling me a witch?" Marinette asked, flexing her head to the side.

"What?! No!" Adrien's eyes opened in shock.

"I'm just teasing" Marinette laughed "But I'm quite magical, you know?"

"Yeah, more than that" Adrien nodded, and then realized he wasn't suppose to answer that. He felt the blood running to his cheeks "I mean, I, what I was trying to say was that I-I like cats… _I swear_ ; I don't understand why yours doesn't like me back" _Yes, perfect, let's go back to the cat subject._

"Well cats love me, maybe I can give you tips" Marinette smiled.

 _Yes, princess, I can tell from experience that cats love you._

He couldn't say that out loud, and it was a miracle that the words didn't come out before he could stop them; For the first time in a long time, Adrien could give Marinette a sincere smile, so that's what he did, and as another miracle on the exchange, Marinette smiled back, and he could tell it was as genuine as his smile.

"Thank you for bringing him, and I'm sorry if he caused you any troubles" Marinette leaned on her door, without taking his sight of him.

"It was nothing" Adrien sighed. "I'll see you"

"Tomorrow" Marinette said as she closed the door "Your suit is almost ready"

"Alright, _tomorrow_ "

"Tomorrow!" Marinette giggled behind a closed door.

Adrien turned around back to his apartment with a smile and a euphoric feeling of happiness taking over him.

 **xxxx**

"I'm not going out with you two ever again" Nino said. Pulling his cap down to his eyes and shrugging to try to hide his face while he gave a bite to his burger.

"I would love to say they are here for me, but we both know you are the most famous on the table, so this is your fault" Chloé lifted a brow at him, difference to Nino, she was all smile and poses as she drank her iced tea.

"What are you talking about? You are the mayor's daughter and Adrien is teenage heartthrob model, son of famous designer Gabriel Agreste" Nino said back at her.

"Sorry to go against you, Nino, but Chloé here is right" Adrien pointed at the blonde girl as she smiled proud "Chloé is too busy traveling so she barely appears next to her dad lately, and I haven't been in the cover of a magazine in like _forever_ "

"You are the one who's ruining dinner" Chloé giggled.

"Shut up, you both are famous no matter how long you haven't been in the public eye." Nino said in between his teeth.

Chloé and Adrien looked at each other before laughing.

"So tell me about this new girlfriend of yours, well if she is still your girlfriend; The Sun says you already split and that they have seen you hanging out with a new girl here in Paris." Chloé said; a cocky smile on her lips.

"Whoa, they are right! That's a first" Nino exclaimed. "And she wasn't my girlfriend, you know that, stop teasing"

"It's fun when you can't keep a fake girlfriend for a week" Adrien laughed "Also I want to point out that neither of us has appeared on The Sun, which makes you the famous one of the table" Adrien lifted his hand to high five Chloé. She touched his palm with her fingers in a soft and fast move. Adrien sighed at it, it wasn't a high-five but it was something, in fact, coming from Chloé that was a lot.

But then Chloé caught his wrist and brought his hand closer to her face.

"What happened to you?!" Chloé touched the scratches on his hand, then went up to the most recent one around his forearm .

"Nothing" Adrien brushed it off.

"Marinette's cat hates him" Nino chuckled. Adrien threw daggers with his eyes at him.

"Marinette Dupain-Cheng?" Chloé asked at Nino, whom nodded. "You've seen Marinette?"

"Yes" Adrien simply said, he wasn't getting in an argument with Chloé, not now and for sure not about Marinette.

"Oh" Chloé took the glass on her hands and bit the tip of the straw of her tea.

Nino looked at Adrien in confusion, but Adrien looked at him the same way. Whatever was on Chloé's mind right now was a mystery and Adrien wasn't quite sure if it was good to pursue the answers.

They kept talking about banal things, work, the weather, a new movie that was about to come out in theaters but Chloé looked strange the whole time. Adrien expected a reaction of Chloé at hearings Marinette name, but this wasn't the one he had imagined he would see. Chloé was predictable, so it was shocking when she didn't act as she was supposed to.

Once they finished their dinner and ran away from the reporters and paparazzi chasing them, Nino left them so he could go see Alya.

Chloé and Adrien stayed together and jumped into Adrien's car so he could drop her home.

As Adrien drove across the busy streets, Chloé was in complete silence, with her hands crossed in front of her chest, not changing the radio stations and looking at a dead point in front of her.

"Chloé, I can tell something is wrong, Nino is gone, you can talk to me"

"Does Marinette remember you?" Chloé turned to him, big eyes full of wonder, which make Adrien more confused. For once she had gone straight to the point and the concern of her eyes was something odd, especially if the subject they were talking about was Marinette.

"You know about Marinette" He gasped. It hadn't occurred to him that Chloé could know about Marinette's accident, yet it was very likely. Chloé stayed in Paris and only started traveling around the world two years ago. Chloé had been here.

"Yes… I do… I sent her flowers when she was in the hospital" Adrien was surprised by that statement

"You never told me!" He jumped. _She was here, she knew and she never mentioned Marinette. Not once!_

"You never asked" She said back but then sighed "I know it's not excuse…"

"It's not excuse! Not at all!" Adrien shouted in a way that was unlike him. He sighed, this time calmer he spoke to Chloé again "Would you mind to explain?"

"Marinette came to me before she… before anything that happened to her happened, okay?" Chloé said, her hands moving as she spoke "She was asking for your number, apparently she had wrote down your new number wrong, and she had a new number too, it was something like that… I can't remember what it was exactly; but I do remember that we had a big argument about it." Chloé sighed "It was something stupid, just me pushing her limit and her reacting to it, you know, the normal stuff between us, except things didn't turn out as I expected."

Marinette burst in tears in front of me… it was something surreal, to see Marinette break in front of me but the bizarre part was later when we were seriously speaking from heart to heart. I don't know how we went from her asking for your number to me promising not to tell a word about her to you, till this day I don't understand it, one moment I'm telling her how happy you are at your university and no matter how much it bothers me that you two are friends that I will give her your number, because I know it would make you happy, and the other moment she is making me promise to not ever talk about this and not to mention anything about her to you"

"What?" Adrien couldn't breathe.

"I know it sound made up but—"

"Didn't you ask her why she changed her mind? She came to you, of all people! And not only you hid this from me, you also knew about the accident and still—"

"She made me promise!" Chloé shouted, interrupting Adrien.

"When did you start keeping promises to Marinette?"

"I don't know! Since that moment, I guess?" Chloé shrugged "I don't like Marinette, but I'm not the bad person I once was and… you were so happy Adrien, if I… if I told you she was hurt you wouldn't had been happy anymore and I couldn't take that risk"

Adrien sighed. No matter how weak Chloé's excuse was, she was being honest about it. Maybe Marinette's promise didn't mean much to her, but Adrien was extremely aware of how much Chloé cared about him, she didn't have the best ways to show it, especially when they were younger, but she cared and loved him very much, so when she said she didn't want to put his happiness at risk, he knew she was telling him the truth.

"So, you sent her flowers?" He asked, trying to keep his cool.

"Yes, tried to speak to her once, things didn't go as I planned"

"What happened?"

"She didn't remember me, but she acted like she did, she wasn't nice to me, which I obviously didn't like, so I wasn't nice back. Long story short: I didn't end well and I never tried again"

"She was mean to you?" Adrien knew it was wrong but inside of his mind a little Adrien was doing a victory dance. It was about time that Marinette was mean to someone else!

"Yeah, and she was very verbal about it, I never heard her say so many bad words, it was worse than you" Chloé laughed "It wasn't her… I know I act like I don't like her, I mean, I don't like her but the reason why is because she is very likable… Does it make sense?"

"Yes, it does" Adrien crossed his arms around Chloé. "I still wished you had told me about it, you know? But it's not your fault, I didn't keep contact with Marinette, I never tried so I can't be mad at you for not telling me, if I had asked you probably had spilled everything"

"We don't know that" Chloé smiled bright. "So, you didn't answer: Marinette remembers you?"

"No" Adrien rubbed one of his eyes against the palm of his hand "She was also very mean to me, we are neighbors and she works for my father so we have interacted more, but she is still awkward around me" Thought today had been a rare occasion where she actually looked _comfortable._

"She was always awkward around you"

"It's different this time, before it was because she liked me, now I can't point out why"

"You knew she liked you? Here I was thinking you were the king of obliviousness"

"Hey!" Adrien hid his head in between his shoulders "Nino told me just recently" That made Chloé burst into a big laugh.

"It was so obvious, Adrikins!" Chloé shook her head and flicked her hair away from her eyes.

"I was homeschooled, how was I supposed to know?" Adrien asked, more focused on parking the car in front of the hotel, than keeping the conversation with Chloé.

"Adrien" Chloé whispered before opening her door.

"Chloé?"

"In high school, when you were sad, Marinette always brought you baked goods to bright up your mood, and when Marinette wasn't around, you would go and buy something yourself"

"Yeah?" Adrien narrowed his eyes, trying to figure it out what she meant.

"I think you need to bright up your mood" She said "I'll call you to go out again, I'm very busy as I told you, but I'll try to see you soon, okay?"

"Okay"

"And Adrien"

"Yes?"

"The bakery closes in an hour" And with that Chloé was off.

 **xxxx**

Adrien felt fourteen years old all over again.

As he stared at the front door of the bakery, with his beautiful windows covered in black and gold, the door made of glass that he had crossed so many times, the same door that had always been open for him, he couldn't recall how many times he had run across that door without thinking it twice. Opening and waving at Marinette's parents, whom always offered him warm smiles and kind words, welcoming him immediately, never asking what he was doing there or getting offended by him popping at their door without warning. And now, he couldn't make himself step inside.

It was a bakery and the sign on the door still displayed the words "OPEN". He could get in if he wanted, it was a store, he wasn't interrupting in a private place, yet it felt like if he entered he was going to disturb the peace of the place.

Adrien took a step closer to the door, he extended his hand to take the pommel of the door, but as he did it the object seemed to go away from him instead of closer. The reason behind it was pretty obvious, yet it took Adrien several seconds to process that the door was being open from the inside of the bakery, and by no one else than the owner himself.

"Adrien?" Tom asked looking down to him "Adrien Agreste?"

"Uh, h-hi, M. Dupain?" What was with him today and the stuttering?

"Adrien! I can't believe you, it's been years!" Tom crossed one arm around Adrien's shoulders and pulled him closer, bringing him inside the bakery "Sabine, look who was outside!"

Marinette's mother was on the counter, with a big rectangular box made of paperboard opened in front of her, in which she was placing pastries decorated with baby blue frosting on top of them. She turned around when her husband called for her. The look in her eyes was plain till she saw Adrien beside Tom.

"Oh, Adrien!" Sabine smiled, that soft and sweet smile that she shared with Marinette and that always made Adrien feel at ease.

Adrien waved at her, he was still trembling inside but with the amazing welcome they were giving him he started to relax.

"Look at you, you are so grown! It's good to see you have put some weight, it suits you" Sabine moved his husband arm away from Adrien and wrapped her arms around him instead.

Sabine was at least two heads shorter than Adrien, so he kneeled a little bit to give back the hug.

"It's a pleasure to see you, Madame Cheng"

"Oh, you are back with that! It is Sabine and Tom, you know it, Adrien"

"It's been a while so—" Adrien giggled nervously. He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, something he did when he was nervous. That little phrase opened a whole subject Adrien wasn't sure he was ready to talk about.

"No sense" Tom shook his hand as he was brushing his words away. "What brings you here? I hope you have some time for a little chat"

"Sure, Tom" Adrien nodded; still unsure of how to act around them.

"Are croissants still your favorite? I think we have a few left" Sabine said, rummaging inside of the paperboard box.

"Oh, really it's not necessary" Adrien politely declined, though he was dying to get a bite of those delicious croissants.

"Adrien Agreste refusing to eat croissants? I don't buy it for a second, c'mon, son, it's on the house!" Tom tapped his back, encouraging him to go and take the croissant Sabine had pulled out of the box.

"Well, one can't hurt" Adrien giggled.

"Take more than one if you want, we can't sell them since they are not fresh. I save them for Marinette in case she comes by; I always have a box waiting for her"

"Oh, that's why her apartment always smells like sugar and frosting" Adrien pointed out as he bit the croissant, only realizing what he said after he had swallowed. "We are neighbors"

"Marinette told me, sweetie. She also said you are going to a party together?"

"Uh, yeah, I modeled for her and… my dad thinks is good if we go together" He explained

"You saved her photoshoot" Sabine smiled at him "She was really grateful"

"It's the least I could do, she is my friend… and I haven't been a good friend in years" Adrien sighed. He couldn't brush away the subject any longer, the guilt had been eating him from the inside since the moment he saw Marinette again, he had been blaming others for his own mistakes when he should have accepted that the fault was all his. He had been the one who didn't try to contact Marinette, he had been the one who was too scared to call her and now he had to face the consequences "I'm sorry I wasn't here for her… I wish I had"

"Adrien" Sabine and Tom said at the unison.

"Please don't try to cheer me up or say it doesn't matter, because it does, I should have try to reach her"

"I can't deny that" Tom said, clearing his throat before continuing "We were a little astonished when we didn't heard about you, since we thought Marinette had gone to visit you"

"Me?" Adrien blinked in consternated.

"Yeah; Marinette was really sad after you were gone, she spoke about visiting you when she had the money, so when she came out of the blue saying she was going on a trip, we thought she had gone visit you" Tom answered him. Adrien's stomach twisted at his words.

"We should have asked for more details…" Sabine sighed.

"We should have" Tom agreed with his wife "It was strange, but we didn't realize at the time… if it wasn't for Alya I don't know what could have happen with our Mari"

Marinette's parents glanced at each other with gloom on their eyes.

This was the moment Adrien had been waiting for months, yet he wasn't sure if he could go for it. He wanted answers about Marinette, he wanted more than the things she had told him as Chat Noir, and more than those little things she had let slip, he needed more information than the one he had collected, and yet he couldn't find the courage to ask.

Maybe it didn't have anything to do with courage and more with how manipulative Adrien would feel asking Tom and Sabine; Marinette probably had her reasons to hide such delicate information, it would be disrespectful to go searching those answers without her consent seemed wrong.

It felt wrong, it was wrong but Adrien couldn't stand being in the dark, not any longer.

"Can I ask what happened?"

"Marinette hasn't told you much, uh?" Tom asked. He didn't' sound mad about Adrien's question and his question was more of a fact; he knew his daughter was keeping things from Adrien.

"She doesn't remember anything about me" Adrien said the usual sadness sleeping on his words.

"We know" Sabine nodded at him "Marinette doesn't like when we give her information or try to trigger her memory, she likes to do it herself, but she has ask a little about you. She wanted to know if you were a good person, we assured her you were, sweetheart"

Adrien had always been a transparent person, but today he probably had his problems written all over his face with highlighter ink, because Sabine's last comment had nothing to do with Marinette, it was only Sabine making Adrien feel good as she used to do when he was around all those years before.

"Thank you, really" Adrien brushed his hair out of his forehead, taking the hair band on his wrist and pulling all his blonde hair into a little ponytail in the back of his head.

"We know how much it hurts to not be remembered" Tom said. One more time he crossed his arm on Adrien's shoulder and guided him to a table on the back of the bakery. Sabine followed them, bringing with her more croissants for Adrien, food that this time Adrien didn't turn down; if they were going to have this conversation he was going to need something to cheer up his mood.

Adrien sat down in one of the wood chairs around the table of the same material and color. Sabine placed the croissants in front of him offering him a smile and he gave one back. Tom and Sabine sat close of each other, at only a small distance from Adrien.

He was surprised by how easily was to be around the Dupain-Cheng, and how amicable they were no matter how much time it had been without hearing from him; thought it made him happy to be welcomed with such affection, it made the knot of guilt on his stomach grow.

Adrien kept his mouth shut and his eyes on the croissants, waiting for one of them to start speaking, he didn't count with the same level of relationship and trust they had had when he was a teenager, when he was closer to them than he was with his father (not like that was a hard thing to achieve) but Marinette and him were close friends and he spent the majority of his time in the bakery, Tom had taught him how to make bread! And bread was a really hard food, so it took several classes for Adrien to master the art of baking bread.

On his way here he thought all of that was gone, that amazing relationship he had build with these two amazing parents, gone. But it wasn't like that; it wasn't the same either, but it hadn't fall apart, it hadn't break, it was just bend.

"There's not much to tell if we are being honest with you, Adrien, we are in the dark as much as you are and we will be till Marinette remembers and decides to tell us" Tom started.

"We know the before and the after but not what happened and what would kill all the questions, only Marinette knows that, or well, used to know that" Sabine added "What would you like to know?"

"I don't want to interlude much, Marinette should decide if she wants to tell me the details" Adrien swallowed "You said Marinette left Paris, and you thought she went to see me"

"Yes" They both nodded "She never told us she was going to see you, we just assumed; she was being very secretive. I thought she was hiding she was going to see you because I would tease her"

"Because she had a crush on me" Adrien gasped and then swiftly added something to that statement "I wasn't aware of that at the time, I've been informed about it recently; apparently I am the king of obliviousness" Sabine and Tom laughed.

"Yes, because she had a crush on you" Adrien's smile trembled, it was weird to talk about Marinette with her parents, especially like this "So we both just waited for her to call us and tell us she was okay"

"Which she did… the first three days" Sabine interrupted "Then a few days passed without her calling us, we weren't worried, we thought she was having fun and that the time-zones were tricky"

"But we were wrong, and we only knew it when Alya came by to ask us if Marinette had contacted us. We told her we hadn't heard of her in a while, that maybe we should call you. Alya was perplexed, because Marinette had told her that she was going to Belgium to look for inspiration for her upcoming designs. And that was the moment when we knew something was wrong"

"What? Marinette lied to Alya?" Adrien understood perfectly how Alya felt. Marinette didn't like lies and lying about where she was going was something big.

"Yes, and she made us believe she was with you, because no matter all the teasing, she never denied it. Marinette is not good with lies, so when we fit the pieces of the puzzle together and realized how big Marinette's lie was we just lost it. We started looking for her everywhere, we asked everyone who had seen her lately. Alya called Nino and he tried to reach you too, but she wasn't lucky with that, we don't know why" _Maybe because I changed my phone number like three times in my first month in USA, stupid, stupid, stupid!_ "No one had any leads of where Marinette could be, we try to check her credit card to see if we could track her but Marinette hadn't left any marks, she was just… gone" Sabine sobbed, her eyes were full of tears, the feelings she had felt on those days were just as strong when she remembered them.

"It was two weeks full of fear, sadness and pain, we couldn't sleep, we couldn't eat. The Tuesday of the third week, I remember well because I was baking again –we had closed the bakery to fully focus on finding Marinette, but we had to open, we didn't have the luxury to keep it close- when Alya crashed the door open against the wall and told us she had found Marinette. Alya never told us how she found her, no matter how many times we asked. Alya took a plane and four days later she was calling us..."

"Alya found Marinette" Adrien gasped.

"Yes… Alya was the one who found her and took her to the hospital. That's another thing Alya has kept a secret, she has never said in which state she found Marinette, and it's something I prefer to never know, my imagination is enough" Sabine cleaned up the tears that were running from her eyes "We flew to Shangai as fast as we could. Alya was outsides Marinette's room; bad news written on her face, she was tired, her eyes were injected in red as she hadn't stop crying for days… We knew we had to prepare for the worst, but when we got inside her room… there were so many tubes around _ma poupée"_ Sabine covered her face with both of her hands, which made Adrien react immediately. He moved the chair and leaned closer to her, placing his hand against her shoulder, trying to comfort her.

"She was in a coma for eight months, two of those she spent them in Shangai but as soon as she was stable enough we brought her back to Paris. And then the rest it's pretty obvious: she woke up with no memory" Tom gasped.

After that, they stayed in silence. Adrien took a croissant from the table and eat it slowly, his brain was trying to formulate a good phrase to fill the silence, something told him he had to say something but he couldn't come out with anything decent.

Then a light bulb titled on his brain.

"Mari, she-she told me that she feels emotions?" Adrien asked, terrified of how his question could be taken.

"Oh, she told you about that" Tom said surprised

"Yeah" Not exactly to Adrien but Chat Noir, at the end it was the same.

"That's how she explains it, but her therapist told us it is how her PTSD manifests. We don't have a base to explain it so it's all we have" Adrien didn't believe that. He was around Marinette constantly and something like a PTSD attack would be easy for him to detect, even a subtle one, his cat senses helped him and he suffered from PTSD, he knew it. Maybe Marinette's irritability could have a relation with a PTSD but the way she described it, the way she explained him didn't seem to be a PTSD effect.

But Adrien kept that from him.

"Thank you for telling me all of this, it helps me to understand Marinette more" He said sincerely. "I want us to be friends again, I've been trying to win her back but I have also been afraid of how she could react, and now that you have given me another piece of information I feel that I'm taking a step closer to her"

"We are glad to hear, Adrien. Marinette can't remember it now but she adores you, you are very special to her" Tom's words were so genuine that they started a fire of happiness on Adrien's heart.

"Her subconscious knows it" Sabine had stopped crying and was now smiling at the boy "When she woke up, she believed she live in USA and that studied astrophysics"

"R-really?" Adrien blinked mystified; a tint of red splashing on his cheeks.

"Yes, it took Alya three days to convince her that it wasn't true. She named you in multiple occasions but Marinette never paid much attention, you know how stubborn she can be"

"Yes" Adrien smiled, it was bittersweet to know that something inside Marinette was yelling Adrien's name but at the same time other thing was muffling those screams.

The conversation took a different direction after that, the words between them flow swift as a river. Adrien laughed and joked around with Tom as he did when he was younger, he ate more baked goods that he ever allowed himself to eat, something that made Sabine very happy (she just kept repeating how skinny he was before) In resume, the night shifted from a dark grey and cold morning to a bright and calm twilight in summer, so he didn't notice how late it was till Plagg kicked him from inside of his jacket's pocket.

Adrien left with the promise of coming back as soon as he could.

Back on his car, he let Plagg break free. He didn't get to ask what was wrong with him, when Plagg was already spilling all the details.

"I sense energy, a very strong energy! I can't tell what it is but if I can feel it this strongly, something must be happening!"

"I'll call Nino" Adrien said at the same moment he pulled his phone out of his jeans and placed it against his ear.

But Nino didn't answer at the first or the second call. There were many reasons why Nino wouldn't pick up his phone: he had his headphones on, he was sleeping, the phone was in silence, he could still be with Alya and ignoring the call on propose. There were a bunch of probable and completely normal possibilities for him not picking up, but Adrien's gut told him the reason wasn't a normal one, because after all they didn't live normal lives.

He switched on the car and drove to the closest parking he found. He ran to the closest dark corner and called his transformation. In less than ten minutes he was running on top of a building, climbing in between pipes on his black suit.

This time he tried to reach him using his baton, but Nino didn't answer. He freaked out, he always tried to not overreact but what could be happening for Nino not to pick up? The only answer popping on his head was linked to the energy Plagg had told him about.

He ran, screaming Nino's super hero name hoping he could hear him. He felt desperate, a raw and dark energy running through his veins that he didn't' understand. Yes, he was worried and yes he tended to be a little bit dramatic but this feeling was different, as it didn't belong to him.

Chat Noir stopped, reaching for air, trying to lower down the lousy emotions. He pressed his back against one of the pipes wall and placed his hand above his heart, trying to control the breaths he was taking. His eyes focused on the points of his shoes, how the silver tops of them mirrored the Parisian sky when in the corner of his eyes and reflected on that silver a female shadow appeared, but he was so focused on the rhythm respiration than he didn't notice.

 _"_ _Look I thought I saw a pussy cat and I did I saw a pussy cat!"_

Adrien smirked and looked up, ready to make a comeback, ready to tease of Marinette who always made fun of his cat references, ready to see that beautiful smile of hers. But he wasn't ready for who was standing in front of him.

 _"_ _Ladybug?!"_

 **xx**

 **OKAY THIS IS IMPORTANT!**

 **Want to remind everyone english is not my first language and that I don't have a beta (my social skills suck) but I'm trying my best to I would appreciate** **if ppl didn't use private messages to completely edit my story telling me "this way is better". That said I love constructive critic, that's okay and I love to receive it :)**

 **thank you to the people who are supporting the story and like it, I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **find me on tumblr: buginettte and on AO3 as LilaacStars xx**


	13. In Which Ladybug Is Back

Adrien closed his eyes and counted to ten on his mind. He was trying to keep calm and recover the missing air of his lungs.

How many times had he joked about Ladybug leaving him breathless? Innumerable times, but only tonight he figured it out the exact meaning of breathless.

Adrien felt like he was being sucked into a dark hole and taken into another dimension.

Ladybug had always been a circumpolar star on Adrien's sky; she never left his mind, she was always there on his horizon. But now thanks to recent events she had become a shooting star; a short event of joy and hope that just as fast as had appeared, had also flown away from him.

And now that star wasn't in the sky anymore, she had become a meteorite that had finally landed on Earth.

She wasn't just a name or a memory orbiting around Adrien's head, she was flesh and bone, she was real. After years of dreaming of her, she was finally real.

"Cat got your tongue, _minou_?" She smiled and it was like contemplating the born of a star. The energy ran through Adrien's veins and nuclear explosions burst inside his body.

" _My lady_?" Chat Noir stuttered at her nickname.

He stood up to get a better look. She took a step away when he did that but once in front of her she leaned into him, wrapping him in her arms in a tight hug.

"Oh, I've missed you so much!" She said excitedly.

Her head rested on his shoulder, and her arms were around his waist. She was so close that he could feel how her chest went up and down at the rhythm of every breath.

"I've missed you too, you can't imagine how much" Adrien finally reacted at the situation and hugged her back.

Firmly wrapping his arms around her waist he lifted her from the floor so he could spin with her. "Bugaboo, I thought I would never see you again"

Adrien had many questions, questions that he wanted to be answered now but he knew this wasn't the moment. They held each other in silence, playing with pieces of each other's hair and caressing the back of their necks.

Ladybug moved her head closer to his neck.

Her hair fell like a curtain in front of him Adrien sniffed her hair, trying to smell that old sweet scent of hers; but it was different, she smelled like flowers and something citric, it wasn't the smell he was used to relating her to, but it wasn't bad, it was just new. Adrien couldn't expect for her to stay the same after all these time.

Adrien started playing with the strings of her hair. He used to do that all the time, her ponytails were always fun to play with and he made Ladybug laugh. Now, she was wearing her hair down, it gave him more pieces of hair to play with, but also it turned to be messier than it was before, her hair was longer and not tied up, so the black strings got tangled with his claws.

He heard and felt Ladybug's laugh against him which untied an explosion of emotions ran through his veins.

"You don't change do you, minou?" Ladybug cupped his cheeked and with his thumb rubbed the corner of his mouth.

"I would never, my lady." He said. A smirk appeared on his mouth and Ladybug rubbed her finger tips along his lower lip.

Adrien was lost on her touch, it was careful and soft, a bit sensual too. When Ladybug pressed his lips against his cheek, he only smiled further, leaving a kiss on her cheek in return.

He wasn't expecting Ladybug's next move.

Ladybug's lips were against his, gently moving and brushing against his mouth. Adrien gasped at the touch, but he didn't move away. His reaction let Ladybug know that it was okay to take a step forward. She took his lower lip between hers, slowly pulling away.

Adrien's mind began to spin around.

This wasn't the first time he had been kissed. Of course, it wasn't.

He had kissed many people, he knew how kisses worked, he knew what it was like to get drunk on a kiss, to wish it for it to never end, but this was different.

But He never felt as attached to someone as he felt attached to her. Adrien's life revolved around her, as a planet revolved around the sun. She had always been a planet: powerful, magnificent, full of wonders and uniqueness and he had always been a moon.

In that moment all the things he had said before disappeared.

He forgot about every single word he said denying his romantic love for her, he forgot about him wanting to be just friends, he forgot about the questions he was supposed to ask, he forgot about alerting Nino, he forgot about Marinette.

He forgot about the world and he kissed her back.

 **xx**

When Alya was a little girl, her teacher asked her what she wanted to be when she grew up. As many other kids in class, she wanted to be a superhero.

As the years passed by and Alya grew older, she never stopped dreaming of being a superhero. It was a wishful thinking, the kind every person has. Those "what ifs" that never vanish from your brain and that pay you a little visit every once in a while.

Alya would have taken any opportunity that could turn her imagination into reality. Well, old Alya would have.

A few years ago her daydreams of being a superhero had changed.

Her dreams used to be colorful, scenarios featuring grateful people with smiles on their mouths. They ended with a proud and happy Alya looking from the sky as she ran back to her civilian life. Now those dreams started in bright colors but they fade into shades of black. They turned every positive emotion into the dark opposite. Once the dark and cold setting was settled it was time for memories to make their appearance, playing well-rehearsed emotions that made her cringe.

But what changed an obsessed mind like Alya? What erased such an old loved daydream?

Traumatic experiences, that's what murdered a dream.

Alya had a short list of traumatic experiences, the first one on the list was highlighted in red and would have been enough for Alya to change her mind of being a superhero, still there were other reasons that she had collected over the years, and today she was adding a new one to the list: As cool as it looked, running through rooftops wasn't fun.

She had been rescued by Ladybug and Chat Noir repeatedly, but they had never run and jumped across the city with her in their arms; not like Nino was doing right now.

When he took her in his arms, she was really excited about the adventure. Once Nino jumped out of the window, her thoughts swiftly changed.

Alya buried her nails and her head into Nino's neck, giving a muffled scream. Her stomach seemed to have changed positions because there was no possibility that it had stayed in the same place after Nino's jump.

Nino had stopped, offering to leave her in a safe place on the ground. He had been serious and the worry on his eyes sparkled as he spoke softly to her, but in between all that softness, there was a smirk threatening to show up on his face. Alya knew he wanted to tease her, so she didn't give him the satisfaction. Denying being afraid or nauseous –which she was- Alya put on a calm and chill façade and told Nino to keep going.

Why was she like this? That was a question she asked herself more times than she would like to.

However, as scared and nauseous as she felt, it was also nice to see Paris from this point of view. She saw the city like an omniscient narrator on a book would. Maybe she should start climbing the roofs to get new stories to write about, of course without all the running and jumping, that wasn't necessary. She'll have to ask Marinette to help her with her climbing skills.

She was able to enjoy only a few parts on the way, mostly at the end when Nino decreased his speed till he completely stopped.

"How are you doing? No lies" Nino asked. He left Alya back on her feet, close to one of the pipe walls in case she needed support.

"It was like that time I bet you I could ride Space Mountain ten times in a row, and you know how that ended" Alya explained. She pressed one of her hands on her forehead, and the other against Nino's arm to keep balance and not fall out of the roof thanks to her nausea "Why did we stop?"

"The energy feels strong a few blocks down, but the metro is on that corner" He pointed to his right, where the metro sign was displayed "I don't know what I'm looking for, it could be dangerous. Is better if you go home, Alya"

"What?! No way. I want to get to the end of this; you are not getting rid of me so easily. I may see the world as a spinning wheel right now but in five minutes I will be fine"

"When you hear the word dangerous do you understand its meaning or your brain just censors it out of sentences?"

"I'm curious by nature, I like playing detective and I'm good at it; you can't give me a riddle and expect me to not try to figure it out"

"I will take you with me on one condition" Nino crossed his arms against his chest.

"What?" Alya put her hands on her hips. She leaned her body to Nino, shifting her weight from one leg to another.

"You tell me what you are hiding" Nino took a step closer which closed their distance.

"I said I would think about it" Alya pursed her lips. Why was so hard for him to understand that she didn't want to talk about it?

"Then you are not coming with me" Nino stated, lowering his head to be closer to her

"I could still follow you" Alya pursed her lips, showing off her frustration.

"I'm faster and can lead you to a dead end if I wanted to" The tremble on his words was what gave his plan away.

"You did this on purpose" Alya clenched her teeth. Placing one finger against his chest she pushed him away "That's cheating! You are trying to manipulate me into talk!"

"You won't talk to me!"

"It doesn't make it right" Alya ran her hands trough her hair in a nervous motion. "Is this more important than me and my feelings? This superhero mystery mission is more important to you than I am?"

"No, it is not and never will" Nino said. He lowered his head; the guilt shined on his eyes "Listen… I… I'm sorry, I shouldn't have tried to manipulate you, it was wrong, it felt wrong when I was doing it, too. I'm going to be fully honest with you right now, Alya"

Alya blinked, skeptical. With arms still crossed and she pushed her shoulders back and tossed her hair away from her face. She stood on the roof wearing all her confidence and displaying it as a neon sign.

A little apology wasn't enough for her. She wanted an explanation, she wanted the full story. To obtain said story, she wasn't going to move, talk or acknowledge Nino until he did; for that, she needed to look as though as she could be.

"Alya" Nino whispered. His arm was reaching forward, like an invitation for her to take his hand and continue with their path.

Alya ignored him.

She only tilted her head into his direction when she heard him sigh.

"I desperately need this information, Alya" Nino intertwined his fingers, a clear sign of how nervous he was. Alya, realizing this, dropped her arms to the side of her body and showed real interest in his words "I would never put any work task above you, not ever. After all these years you are still who I care most and I hate to treat you as a pawn in a game you did not ask to be part of. But the information you have may be an essential part of the puzzle we are trying to solve. Like it or not, I need to get that information, that's why I have pushed you so hard about it. I know you know more than you make me believe. I know something happened and that you are acting as it hadn't, you act like you still were Ladybug's fan and that everything is okay, but I know it's not how you feel, not anymore. So, please, Alya, please tell me what you know"

Alya's lips parted open. She was stunned by Nino's words. They were exactly what she wanted to hear but she still got surprised by them.

"Won't your energy walk away?" Alya drifted her sight from his eyes. Her wall was about to fall apart. Truth must be told, she wanted to tell everything to Nino, she knew he had a good heart and he wouldn't put any person at risk, not on purpose. And that was the catch, Nino wouldn't, but what about his superhero persona? Superheroes put their selves before others, but what happened when a bigger mission appeared? They would probably still protect civilians but would they be able to protect themselves? Nino wouldn't hurt anyone on purpose, but he could end up hurt, Chat Noir could end up hurt, and if they found Ladybug, she could end up hurt too… again.

"No, it's not moving" Nino answered quietly.

"Huh" Alya played with strings of her hair, looking at the split ends as it was the most entertaining activity.

Nino didn't push the subject any further. He sat on the roof, giving his back to Alya.

Alya extended her arms to her sides so she could keep balance as she kneeled down. Once there, she crawled carefully to Nino's side.

"What's your superhero name?" She asked close to his ear.

"Tortue Verte" Nino answered.

"You and Chat Noir are so original" Alya rolled her eyes.

"Let us be" Nino giggled back.

Alya crossed her hands around Nino's neck and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Nino…"

"Alya"

"I will tell you why

"I will tell you why I don't give you the information if you tell me why you want Ladybug back so badly"

She felt Nino's flinch before she ended her sentence, but he didn't say a word about it. He was tense and his breath was arrhythmic.

"What's going on?" Alya asked worriedly.

"Hold on tight, Als" Nino warned her.

"Nooo" Alya did as he said. She crossed her arms around his shoulders, and her legs around his waist. Once she was ready, Nino jumped out of the roof.

This time, the journey wasn't such torturous for Alya, maybe because the path had only been a few blocks down the street instead of half of the city. The only moments when her head swirled as a tornado was in the initial jump and when they finally landed in a dark alley.

Alya got off of Nino's back, ready to jump into action but got stopped by Nino's arm.

"Hey" She grumbled at him.

Lips pursed and a frown displaying on her face; a look that Nino ignored. He took her hand between his and walked her down the street.

Then Alya saw what Nino had been able to see thanks to his magical glasses.

A man lied on the floor. His face was red for the blood that dripped down his nose and mouth. His chest went up and down in a slow rhythm, far away from being a normal breathing tempo.

"I know this isn't the best neighborhood at night but…" Alya swallowed hard. She had presence robbery and murder scenes before, and she had gone through them, but somehow about the scenario in front of her was more unsettling than any other before. "We should call an ambulance" She said, already with her phone on her hand.

Nino nodded at her suggestion. He let go of her hand and knelt close to the unconscious man.

Alya, gave the required information to the SAMU, as she watched Nino examined the body closely. Besides looking at his wounds, Nino's hands moved with precision in delicate moves around him. It was like his hands were dancing in slow motion, and suddenly in only a blink, his hands weren't dancing alone anymore; they had found a partner: water.

Alya's mouth hanged open. She was so surprised that she forgot she was talking on the phone till the operator screamed at the other side of the line asking for the last information she needed.

"What are you doing?" Alya asked Nino, once the call was over.

She wasn't sure if he chose to ignore her or hadn't really heard her, but she didn't repeat her question. She knelt by his side and watched him work.

The wat2er moved as it was a bubble, rotating around Nino's gloved fingers and brushing into the man's skin. It was mesmerizing.

"Impossible" Nino whispered, so low that Alya almost didn't hear.

"What?" But as she expected, he didn't answer.

Nino kept moving his hands around the body. Alya followed the line of bubbles with her eyes, from the puddle in the floor Nino was taking it, to his fingers, to the body and then all the path back.

"Do you remember how it's like being akumatized?" Finally, Nino spoke.

"The feelings is like being in a little room, you feel claustrophobic, you feel as you were suffocating but at the same time you felt all the opposite, as you were free for the very first time"

"Did you feel like that after being cured?"

"Yes" Alya squeezed her eyes as she tried to remember the horrible experience "Only for a few hours, though"

"That's the kind of energy I sense, the remains of an akuma"

"Which should be impossible since Papillon is gone" Alya added, making reference to his words.

"No, it is not impossible… just felt like it for a minute, then I remembered that we only have theories about the butterfly miraculous" Nino explained. His hands stopped moving, the bubbles around united into a big one that the superhero threw back to the puddle. "Things are getting worse"

Alya watched Nino stand up. He was rubbing his temples and walking around in a little circle. She could hear him mumble intelligible words, as he was trying to organize his thoughts.

"Nino" Alya stopped him mid walk. Grabbing him by his shoulders she made him look at her "Breathe"

"I don't have time for that" He grumbled.

In any other occasion, Alya would have laughed at his words but it was impossible to deny how nervous and worried Nino was.

"You should call Chat Noir" She suggested "If I'm going to tell you what I know is better if he is there too"

"Alya" Nino said her name as it was caressing it.

"Don't say anything, let's not waste time and let's go find that cat!" She commanded

"Thank you, wifi" He said sincerely.

"Don't thank me just yet" Her sentence didn't sound as sassy as it usually would, and maybe that was because Alya wasn't sure she could tell all the truth.

 **xx**

"Don't leave again" Ladybug whispered finishing the kiss.

"I won't" Adrien whispered back.

Their lips were still rubbing against each other, it was barely a touch but it made emotions swirl deep in Adrien's mind.

With eyes still closed and with their foreheads pressed to the other, they were enjoying each other's company in silence.

Adrien was so high in the kiss that his brain had disconnected from real life.

"Your hair is so long, it suits you" Ladybug giggled against his neck. Her hands were playing with the short ponytail.

At the mention of his hair, Adrien stiffed. Reality had hit hard and it had come in memories of him and Marinette together, two weeks ago when she cut his hair.

"What's wrong, kitty?" Ladybug cup hi cheek on her hand and backed down to be able to look into his eyes. She was whispering softly to him; trying to figure it out what had changed his mood.

Adrien couldn't focus on her words, he focused on her eyes. He always loved her eyes, the same color of a warm star, but in that moment incandescent blue had changed into a deep crystalline purple.

Adrien felt how a knot tied on his throat preventing him from breathing properly.

Akuma

It was possible, it was missing.

Their theories could be wrong.

What if somebody else had the miraculous? What if that person had hurt Ladybug? What if that same person was now playing with his emotions? Giving him exactly what he wanted, using this Ladybug as a trap to get him. What if? There were too many what ifs.

"Chaton, you are scaring me" Ladybug's hand reached for his cheek but Chat Noir stopped her midway.

Adrien felt like the world was getting little. As curtains were closing in front of his eyes and walls were smashing against his boy, trapping him in a cramped box.

He tried to keep a normal breathing, but it was impossible. The more he give thought about the possibilities of someone having the butterfly miraculous, someone making an akuma, someone trying to tend a trap for him, the more the feeling of being locked.

Adrien pushed Ladybug away.

"Chat Noir?" She tried to reach for him. Adrien turned around, with his staff in hand and pointing at her.

 _Five things you see. Five things you see, Adrien._

 _Uh, Ladybug, no fake Ladybug, no akuma Ladybug… No, no, no._

 _Rooftops, a pharmacy, the lights of Sacre Coeur, my staff, my hands._

 _Good, well done, Adrien._

He wasn't sure if the voice on his head was his own or Plagg breaking the barrier of magic trying to communicate with him. It didn't matter, it was working.

 _Now, four things you can hear._

 _Cars, the tilting of the neon lights on the pharmacy sign… my breathing, steps._

 _Three things you can smell… Three things you can smell, c'mon._

 _Sugar, I smell sugar and… I smell, I smell… Nino?_

Adrien rubbed his eyes, he wasn't out of the woods yet but the familiarity of Nino's scent was enough to pull him back to reality.

And there he was, still pointing Ladybug with his baton. Ladybug had both of her hands in the air as she was trying to appease him. Her eyes were full of worrying and still in a lilac shade.

Her sight only left his when he drifted his glance to the new superhero in the rooftop.

Nino stood there in his Tortue Verte form, with Alya hanging on his back, looking as confused as Adrien felt.

"Alya?!" Ladybug voice rang with fear. Her hands changed into fists and she adapted a fight position.

Seven years may have passed but Chat Noir knew Ladybug better than anyone else, and real Ladybug or fake Ladybug, he knew exactly what she was going to do.

As fast as Ladybug moved one of her feet to start moving, Chat Noir was in front of her blocking her way and throwing her to the ground.

His body was above hers, his legs at the side of her body and his staff above of her elbows, preventing her from moving.

"Chat Noir!" She yelled. She shook her body to the sides, trying to escape from him. "What is wrong with you?! He has Alya!"

"Who are you?!" He asked between his teeth.

"What are you talking about?" Ladybug said and then gave a silent scream "It is me, Ladybug! Your partner, _your lady_!"

Her eyes grew big, filling with tears that started to rain down her cheeks.

When she looked like that, Adrien couldn't take it anymore.

He wanted to scream, he wanted to punch something, he wanted to let all this energy free. He was about to turn into a supernova.

Distracted by his mind, he lost the grip of his stick. Ladybug took the opportunity and escaped from him, throwing him away in the process.

Chat Noir landed at Tortue Verte's feet.

"Thanks for the help, uh" Adrien moaned in pain.

He could see the concentration in Nino's eyes, his hand was extended in Ladybug's direction, and he did not pay a second of his attention to him.

But Alya did. Jumping from Nino's back, she stood in front of him and offered her hand to help him stand up.

Back again on his feet, he stood in front of Alya to protect her, but Alya had other plans in mind. She pushed him to the side and she took a step forward.

"Ladybug" Alya's hands were up, calling for her calm.

"What are you doing?" Chat Noir exclaimed. Grabbing Alya by her arm, he pulled her to him.

"Don't touch her!" Ladybug yelled. Taking her yo-yo from her hip, she threw it on Chat Noir's direction, but her attack only bounced back to her thanks to a wall of water.

"Don't provoke her" Tortue Verte warned "The energy she irradiates is too strong"

"Is she an akuma?" Adrien had to ask, he needed to know.

"I don't know" Nino admitted "I can't tell, but we gotta find out"

"As you say" Chat Noir nodded.

In the time of that short conversation, Alya had rounded the water wall and was at Ladybug's side.

Adrien didn't need powers to sense Nino's emotions; his face let him know immediately how scared he was.

Alya had always been reckless, and usually, Nino had followed her to prevent her from getting hurt. But in those times, Nino had been naïve and didn't know a quarter of the things he knew today. Now he was aware of how the magic worked. He knew how dangerous magic could turn to be. It didn't help that he had senses a powerful and unrecognizable energy just seconds ago. It was normal for him to feel fear when the girl he was in love with had jumped into danger, no matter how usual that was.

"Alya come back here!" Nino shouted.

Both Chat Noir and Tortue Verte gave a step forward, both with their arms in hand ready to fight.

"Alya, get back" Ladybug pushed Alya to her back. With one hand on her yo-yo, she was waiting for them to attack; if they were going to be two against one, she had to plan her moves.

But the superheroes didn't get the chance to attack when Ladybug was already dropping to the floor like dead weight.

"What the hell?" Chat Noir asked. He looked at every direction, tried to understand what had happened. One moment Ladybug was ready to fight, frowning at them and throwing daggers with her eyes and the next she was laying unconscious on the floor.

"Pressure points" Alya whispered. "On her ear, it knocks people down"

Adrien searched for Nino's sight, but he wasn't at his side anymore, he was walking to Alya.

"What you did was extremely dangerous, Alya! I swear I had like three heart attacks in less than a minute!" Nino shouted.

"I knew what to do" Alya simply said.

She gave him her back and knelt by Ladybug's side.

"You knew she wasn't going to hurt you" Nino whispered.

"She would never. Now help me with her, we have to take her home" Alya answered.

She checked her head, looking for any injuries that the fall could have left in her. She brushed Ladybug's bangs and caressed her cheek.

"Everything is fine, you will be okay" She whispered to Ladybug's ear.

"Is she r-really Ladyb-bug?" Adrien stuttered at the question.

If that was Ladybug, why were her eyes purple?

"Yes, she is" Alya nodded.

"How are you so sure?" Tortue Verte and Chat Noir asked at the unison.

"It's not the first time this happens" Alya said "I've learned how to calm her down"

"Why? Why you?" Chat Noir asked

"Because she is my best friend" Alya said.

"Your—" Adrien stopped there. His breath got caught in his throat and a nauseous feeling overwhelmed him.

Best friend? Alya's best friend?!

"Marinette is Ladybug?" Adrien asked.

"Marinette used to be Ladybug, that's more accurate"

Adrien gave a look to the unconscious girl at his feet. One look and the true struck him one more time.

He really was the king of obliviousness.

 **xx**

 **#ADRIENKNOWS #FINALLY**

 **I swear there's like 7 versions of this chapter, but I finally chose this one! Also, this chapter had like at least a 100 more astronomy metaphors and comparisons but it felt like too much at one point, I mean I love astronomy but I think I had crossed the line haha, I just remembered Adrien was an astrophysics teacher and I got excited by all the astronomy terms I could /**

 **I hope you enjoyed! Again thanks for the love**

 **Find me on tumblr .com (i've been postin snippets *wink wink*)**

 **xx**


	14. In Which Alya Breaks Down

By now Adrien was used to lying on Marinette's couch at late hours of the night. Usually, Marinette sat next to him on the floor; a needle and fabric in hands, or her sketchbook and a pencil.

Tonight it was a little different.

He lied on the couch, still transformed, but Marinette wasn't there; Nino and Alya were. Nino was sitting on a chair next to the couch, and Alya was standing in the middle of the room.

They should have started talking by now, that was the smart thing to do; but none of them were using their rational side at those moments. The night had been too emotional for the three of them.

Chat Noir gave a look to the door behind him. He had left Marinette on her bed, still unconscious and transformed. He didn't know how long it would take her to wake up and he didn't know if it was a good idea for him to stay there. So he went back to the living room.

Nino had de-transformed and was bringing a chair from the little kitchen table Marinette had, and Alya had been pacing around the room.

He found his way to his usual spot and saw Alya and Nino inversed in their own world, for five minutes. Five minutes of complete silence and worry.

Nino and Adrien's sight was fixed on Alya who flexed her arms and rubbed the back of her neck.

"Are you okay?" Nino asked, breaking the silence.

"Your shield was uncomfortable, is just that."

"You wanted to piggy ride. I told you the shield was heavy."

"I don't get as nauseous when I'm on your back, it was nothing. I'm just no superhero"

"You saved us from getting our butts kicked tonight, I think that makes you a pretty cool superhero" Chat Noir said.

Alya tried to hide the smirk on her face, she wanted to keep her composure and the straight face she had been finally able to pull up. Bringing her journalist personality into personal matter was something Alya tried to avoid at all costs, but tonight it was a necessity. She didn't want to have this conversation, so that part of her was going to help her to not break down in front of Nino and Adrien.

She wished she could escape from this one more time, but it wasn't possible she had to speak with them and tell the truth. But how much information should she give to them? She should probably tell them all the things she knew, from beginning to end, not leaving any piece of information out of it. She knew that she had to do it, then why was she so scared of revealing what she knew?

Alya looked at Nino sitting on the chair to her left. His arms were on top of the back of the chair, his chin was pressed on his hands and he was looking at her; waiting. Then she looked at Chat Noir. His legs were extended along the couch, yet crossed one on top of the other, shaking one foot at a constant tempo. He had his hands behind his head on top of the left arm of the couch.

From a distance, he seemed relaxed, comfortable, like he was in a familiar space – _he probably_ is _in a familiar space_ Alya thought- but if you looked closer you'll see his jaw was clenched, making a muscle pop once in a while. His sight also drifted from the roof to the door of Marinette's room more times that Alya would have considered healthy.

He was worried about Marinette, that wasn't a surprise; Alya knew they were friends, it was normal for him to worry.

Wait… _they were friends_.

A bulb lighted up on Alya's head, making her remember something.

"Has Marinette told you anything about her accident?" Her voice cut the silence as swiftly as a sword would cut a piece of paper.

"Huh?" Both guys crooked a brow at her in confusion.

"Not you, Nino, I'm talking to Chat Noir" Alya shook her hands brushing him off "Who I would really like to call by a real name by the way"

"Uh…" He sat straight to be able to look Alya in the eyes. He rubbed the nape of his neck and kept his mouth wide open.

"What's left to lose?" Nino and Alya said at the same time

Chat Noir rubbed his eyes on top of the mask; he let out the air out of his lungs on a loud noise and stood up from his seat.

"I've been keeping my identity a secret for almost ten years and all that hard work falls to pieces in a month"

"Why do you have to be so dramatic?" Nino rolled his eyes.

"Because I wanted Ladybug to be the first to know who I was" Chat Noir said in a gloomily tone of voice, the disappointment was clear as water.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. A green light covered his body and showed the guy behind the mask.

Alya kept her sight on him the whole time, only blinking when the dazzling light appeared and blind her.

Finally after all those years of investigation and theories in front of her stood the civilian form of a superhero. And it was no one else than Adrien Agreste.

"I knew it!" Alya pointed him with her index finger "I mean I didn't knew it _, knew_ it, but you were always a suspect!"

Alya wanted to jump out of the window, do a celebration dance, scream, anything to let the happiness out of her body. Euphoria ran on her blood of the excitement of the reveal, discovering a superhero's identity wasn't an everyday kind of thing. She was happy to know the secret, she felt the biggest joy she could feel, because her suspicions had been _right_ (well, almost right, Adrien was one out of 5 suspects, and that was a small group of suspects).

But as happy as it made her, it wasn't a good moment to bring _fangirl Alya_ back. Besides of being embarrassing, since Chat Noir happened to be an old friend of hers, Alya had to focus on the important part of this revelation.

She took a big breath and closed her eyes, trying to organize her thoughts so she could get the situation with more clarity.

Once she opened her eyes, thoughts sorted out and ready to ask questions, she saw a little black body spinning around Adrien's head.

"Is that your kwami?" Alya asked, pointing at the little cat-like creature.

"Yeah, his name is Plagg" Adrien introduced him "Be polite and say hi to Alya, Plagg"

"Don't treat me like a kid, _kid"_ Plagg frowned "Hi, _Ladyblogge_ r" Alya smiled, assumed by the nickname.

"Hi" Alya waved at the kwami. "You should go with Wayzz and share some food, I'm sure Marinette has more lettuce"

"Ew" Plagg made a puking motion "I only eat cheese"

"And crackers" Adrien interrupted "I know Mari has a few. They are in the third cabinet on your left"

Plagg nodded and flew to the kitchen to find his food.

"Well, now that we are over that, we should talk" Adrien clapped and gave a big grin.

"Shouldn't we wait for your kwamis?" Alya asked. Weren't the magical fairies interested in magical business?

"They can hear just fine" Adrien waved his hand "'C'mon, this is serious business

Both Alya and Nino sighed.

"Okay, if we are going to start talking, you should answer my question first." Alya pointed a finger at Adrien "Did Marinette told you anything about her accident?"

"Why would Marinette tell me anything?"

"I don't have time for this" Alya touched her forehead with her hand. After all the events of the night, he kept playing dumb around her? "Marinette is Miss Vigilante, you two are friends"

"You know?"

"Adrien" Nino called

"Marinette is sure Alya has no idea" Adrien answered to Nino. Then he turned to Alya again "She mentioned how over protective you can be, Alya. That you would stop her if you knew. I'm impressed, that's why I asked"

"As much as I don't like it, I wouldn't be able to stop her. Is better if she believes I'm in the dark" Alya sighed.

Adrien saw the worry in her eyes; she had always been protective of Marinette but this was different. Adrien didn't know Alya's side of the story, but if she had been the one to find Marinette and take her to the hospital, her side didn't sound pretty.

"She has told me little things; she told me how it felt to not remember anything and how it feels to remember things. She doesn't share much, really. The only big thing she has explained to me is that she feels emotions, and that would be it. Our conversations are light and fun, we joke around and talk about the present, our friendship is not that deep, yet"

"I don't think Marinette sees it that way" Alya smiled sweetly "She never told anyone about feeling people's emotions, I mean, besides her parents and me… I don't think she ever told Nathanaël"

"Oh" Adrien's cheek stained in the brightest shade of red.

"I don't want to break your moment, but I would like to be included" Nino said. He was moving, still sitting in the chair, closer to Adrien and Alya.

"Sorry" Adrien giggled "He is kind of right, is better if you start talking, Alya"

"No, I got more questions" Alya shook her head.

"But, Alya" The guys said at the unison. They looked tired, tired of waiting for her.

Alya felt a wave of heat slam across her body. She was tense, hands and jaw clenched. She was trying to keep her cool for a little longer. It wouldn't help her cause if she blew up now, so she calmed down.

There were so many things Alya wanted to know, all of them were important and were eating her from the inside out. She needed answers to all of these questions inside of her brain. But right now, her emotions screamed for an answer to one single question, one she had asked herself in many occasions, and now was the moment to find the answer.

"Why now?" She asked. She couldn't elaborate more; if she did her anger would take the best of her.

"What do you mean?" Adrien asked, running over Nino's words.

"Why now? You had seven years to come back to Paris and look for her. Why _now_?" This time was harder to speak.

Adrien and Nino looked at each other, speechless and confused.

How could they answer to that? They couldn't because they didn't have a good answer to give.

Alya paced across the room, hands on fists, and heavy breathing, she was mumbling sentences on a tone of voice too low for either of the guys to hear. As the circle Alya was walking grew in ratio, she started walking around the whole living room.

Nino followed her with his eyes. He was trying to find the right words to calm her down, but nothing came to his head.

Alya only stopped walking when a black car ran in front of her,

"Damn! stupid cat!" Alya shouted. She hit the wall with her fist, making the cat hiss at her.

"He hates me t-too, you should see m-my arms" Adrien tried to light up the tension in the room, but his words came out with stutters. He was a little scared at what reaction he could get from Alya.

Adrien stood up from the sofa and walked to Alya. He had his hands up in front of his shoulders on an attempt to calm her down, and at the same time it was a way of trying to protect himself. Alya was a force of nature ready to attack him, any bad move could be the end of Adrien, she had always been like it, a big thunderstorm, but when it came to protect whom she cared the most, she became a hurricane.

"Don't tell me to calm down" Alya warned him. The rage in her eyes was undeniable. If Papillon were still around, Alya would turn into Lady Wifi already.

"We just want to talk, Alya" Nino reminded her. His voice was sweet and peaceful, the opposite of hers.

"Then answer my questions! Why now?! Why not when she went missing? Huh? What do you need from her now?!"

"Alya, calm—"Nino tried to talk but Alya didn't allow him to interrupt.

"Calm down?! Calm down?! I'm not calming down!" Alya shouted at them.

And there it was, Alya had become a hurricane, ready to raze the world.

"We are talking about my best friend in the whole wide world! None of you were there! I found her! Unconscious, in the middle of a destroyed room" Alya's eyes finally gave up and the tears started to stream down. "You didn't visit her while she was in a coma or helped her to recover her memory. You didn't have to fake a smile around her so she wouldn't feel bad for not remembering you. You didn't spend a year around a person who had constant anxiety attacks, you weren't there for Marinette, but I was. I could have disappeared of Marinette's life but I did not, I stood by her at every step she gave to recovery. So excuse me if I don't give the information I have so easily, excuse me for being scared, excuse me if can't be calm!. I don't know what you guys want from Ladybug, and yes, I say Ladybug because that's why both of you are here, not for Marinette—

"Alya we—"

"Don't" Alya said between clenched teeth "I don't know why you need Ladybug and I'm scared of it. It's been almost seven years and just now you come looking for Ladybug, it must be because you need something that only she can do"

Alya cleaned her tears.

"I know I'm in no position to say this, but you completely forgot about Marinette. She wasn't just a classmate, she was your friend and you didn't call her once, you left France and you didn't look back. If Marinette hadn't lost her memory she would have done everything in her power to keep contact with you, guys"

"I… I… "

"I don't have an excuse" Nino said.

"I have one but now that I think about it is an awful try of an excuse" Adrien brushed his bangs out of his face, running his fingers on the rest of his hair.

"I thought so" Alya rubbed her eyes one more time.

"Maybe I can answer Alya's question" Wayzz appeared beside Nino.

"Be my guest" Alya

"I can talk for Chat Noir, he must have his own reasons, and I'm sure they are valid"

"I'll decide that" Alya frowned "But you may start with your version"

"First, Mademoiselle Alya, you have to know that my old master was the one who chose your friend Marinette as Ladybug. I was aware of this, but seven years ago it was erased from my memory, we don't know how it happened but it did, we are still trying to figure it out. Second, this situation is out of the norm, nothing like this had happened before, so you must understand that if we haven't done anything to fix the situation is because we can't do anything" Wayzz explained "And last but not least, we are used to lose miraculous.

It's also normal for them to go dormant. It's true that this time was different, but I couldn't track the miraculous and Nino was just starting his training. I kept my senses on, trying to get energy from the miraculous. I was worried, but to start a hunt wouldn't had been worth it, so I waited. I tried to use my abilities to try to remember the identity of Ladybug, but it was just as useless as trying to find Tikki" Wayzz sighed "You ask why now, the answer is simple, Adrien came back. I knew the identity of Chat Noir, so when I heard Nino talking about it, I put special attention and finally revealed to Nino that the ladybug miraculous was missing"

"You didn't know?" Alya and Adrien asked in surprise.

"No, my training didn't revolve around finding Ladybug, it was all about being a guardian. I thought Ladybug had retired, since Papillon wasn't around anymore"

"Once I felt the change of energies I told Nino all about the disappearance of the ladybug and the butterfly miraculous" Wayzz said. "We were ready to come back to France, and when I felt a change of energies, we did"

"And it had to do with me?" Adrien asked.

"Yes, Chat Noir" Wayzz nodded "As you already know, the cat and the ladybug miraculous are connected, they are-

"Two parts of a whole, they balance each other, they are like yin and yang" Adrien completed. He had heard the same speech at least a hundred times over the years. The first time was when Mater Fu had introduced himself to Ladybug and him, and after that one time, those words were as usual as akuma and miraculous.

"Exactly" Wayzz pointed out "As I said, I put all my senses on Paris when you came back, if Ladybug was still around, I hoped something would change once you were back, and thankfully something did. It wasn't strong but I felt a change of energies, and that was enough for me to alert Nino"

"And here we are" Nino shrugged.

Adrien saw how Alya rubbed under her eyes, cleaning the tears that kept falling as a broken sink. He was so concentrated on her that he didn't realize he was crying till the drops fell on his mouth.

He felt horrible.

Alya was right. He never tried to get in contact with Marinette. He sent one text to her, didn't get a response and gave up because he thought Marinette had cut him off her life because he was Nino's friend. How stupid could he be? That wasn't Marinette, that wasn't the girl he was in love with. Marinette would have never done something like that, and he should have known it.

"I'm sorry, Alya" Adrien whispered "I'm sorry for being an horrible friend, I'm sorry for being a coward, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry… I never wanted Marinette to get hurt, she means so much to me, if I had known… I should have known… and I—

Adrien couldn't keep talking, the tears streamed down his face and his breathe got caught on his throat. He had so many feelings revolving around his heart and his brain. He had years of worry and love falling like bricks on top of him, and if he was honest, it would be nicer to have his bones broken by real bricks than to feel the pain of the emotional ones.

"Is okay" Alya said in between sobs "Well, is not okay, but there's no way to change it. It is done, and it is past… I know you love her, it can't be unseen…"

The silence came back, but this time it wasn't awkward, on the contrary it was comfortable, because it felt right.

Nino stood up from his chair and took Alya's hand on his, guiding her to the couch next to Adrien. When the three of them were sitting next to each other, Nino embraced his friends in a tight hug.

Adrien crossed an arm around Nino's shoulders and one in front of Alya. Alya, who was in the middle of the guys, hugged their arms with both of her hands. She lied her head on Nino's shoulder and he took the chance to leave a kiss on her forehead, a move she didn't complain about.

They stayed there, close to each other without saying a word until Adrien and Alya stopped crying.

"Marinette left me clues, so I could find her" Alya said. She was ready to talk.

She wasn't going to make a plan or organize her words, she was going to speak from the heart. No filters, whatever she felt like saying she was going to say.

"She left, she told me she was going to Belgium, to seek for inspiration, breathe new airs before entering to university. I thought it was so cool, it was sudden and got worried at first, but Marinette assure me things were fine. She said she was trying to take more risks in life, not over-think life and just go with it. I was so proud of her… I…I" Alya sobbed.

"Take your time, Als" Nino rubbed her back with his fingertips in circular motion.

"She called the first three days, checked in, all was fine till at the end of the week I received a letter from her. I thought it was a souvenir from Marinette, but when I opened it the first words I read were ' _I'm sorry, Alya'"_ Alya let out a chuckle. How naïve had she been. "I have the letter saved on a box on my room, along with the other clues Marinette gave to me"

"Would you mind to show us that box?" Adrien asked her. "If it is too much to ask-

"No, it is not too much. I could show it to you, maybe you can find something on them"

"I doubt it" Adrien smiled at her "You found her, you couldn't have left anything behind"

"You never know" Alya pointed her finger at him "I did found her but I never figured it out why she left"

"But you have your theories…" Nino stated. He knew Alya well, she wasn't someone who could live in doubt, she had to find the answers to everything, and if she couldn't find them she would do anything to put the clues together in a theory that could perfectly fit the story she was trying to figure out.

"A million" Alya huffed "I don't have all the pieces to resolve this puzzle. I have a new theory to add to the pile every day that passes and every little thing Marinette does add or changes something to those theories. It's frustrating and… scary"

"It is" Adrien agreed.

"I'm scared all the time. I didn't lose her but I almost did, and I'm always afraid of the possibility of her going missing again, but this time I don't find her on time. I have those horrible images stuck in my head and they often come back in my nightmares. I wake up crying and sweating, and it takes me minutes to calm myself down and remind me that Marinette is okay, and that is on good days, sometimes the only way to go back to sleep is by calling Marinette"

Alya broke the hug to stand up. She was going to say something important and she wanted to see their faces.

"I was scared of telling you. When Nino asked I knew something was wrong and when I figured it out he was Tortue Verte I freaked out…. So now you have to promise me, you have to swear to me over the thing you love most that you won't take her away from me."

Adrien and Nino looked at each other, a painful look on their eyes.

Alya didn't pour down her feelings so easily, she rarely showed herself weak in front of others. And there she was in front of them, displaying all her vulnerability to them, because Marinette meant the world to her and she would do anything to protect her.

"We promise" Adrien and Nino said at the unison.

"You can't take it back" Alya warned.

"And we won't" Nino said "We found Ladybug, that was the main goal… now we have to work around that and I would never hurt you on propose, Alya. We won't take Marinette away"

"Thank you" Alya sighed. The relief given by Nino's words was imprinted on her face.

Alya and Nino were looking at each other as they were the only ones in the room, and that meaningful look would have last longer if Adrien hadn't give a shout of pain

"I fucking hate this cat!" Adrien said in a muffled tone. His mouth was against his arm, sucking the new scratch on it.

"Me too, but next time please don't scream; I don't want Marinette to wake up yet. She usually wakes up with a horrible headache"

"Sorry" Adrien mumbled. He was going to keep complaining about cat-Adrien but Wayzz interrupted.

"Marinette always presents the same symptoms after coming back to normal?"

"Yes, it's the same every time, from beginning to end. I have it memorized by now" Alya answered. "Oh, I haven't explained that…"

"We got carried away, it is normal" Nino smiled.

"But it would be nice to know since it has happened before" Adrien said.

"Yes, I know. You must be very confused, I know I was the first time it happened" Alya nodded.

"I can't imagine how you coped with it" Adrien sighed. His brain couldn't process the information, it was too weird to understand.

"Me neither, it was terrifying but I didn't run… I guess I love Mari too much" Alya shrugged. "I remember it vividly. It was only a few months after she came back home. She was stressed, I was trying to calm her down but she wouldn't listen. I thought she was going to have a panic attack, so I kept chasing her, trying to make her sit down but she wouldn't and we got into an argument… she was so mad and then… her eyes turned purple. She took a step forward, I took one back, she looked ready to attack me but at the last second a stream of light surrounded her and Ladybug was in her place"

"Damn" Nino said.

"You tell that to me" Alya rolled her eyes "She was sweet as she had always been as Ladybug. She didn't know how she had got into my apartment, and she acted like the accident had never happened. I was shocked so my reaction was to tell her everything that had happened and she panicked"

"Did she believe you?"

"Not at first, he was more worried about me knowing her identity. Then she freaked out about it. She tried to de-transform but it didn't work; she kept screaming a name, _Tikki._ Now that I know more, I suppose that was her kwami's name, right?"

"Yes, Tikki is the kwami of the ladybug miraculous" Plagg said.

"She kept calling for her and she got desperate… I was desperate too, and did the same I did today, I pressed a pressure point on her ear and puff she hit the floor. She came back to being Marinette after an hour of sleeping"

"Wow" Adrien gasped.

"When did you learn that thing anyways?" Nino looked at her. He looked terrified and proud, at all the same time.

"Remember when I took those self-defense classes?" Nino nodded "There, it was taught as additional knowledge but I thought it was interesting so I looked more into it"

"Good, it came handy" Nino giggled.

"You have no idea" Alya said in a serious tone "Marinette turning into Ladybug is not an abnormal thing, it doesn't happen often but is not abnormal"

"It has only happened in front of you?" Adrien asked with concern.

"No, she transformed in front of Sabine once, and Nathanaël has seen her as Ladybug a couple of times, too"

"No one else? Wayzz interrupted Adrien before he was able to speak.

"Not that I know… uh, well… probably the guy we found bleeding on the alley"

"What? You think that was Mari?" Nino was surprised. Did Alya really thought Marinette was capable of it? She probably had the strength but it wasn't something the Marinette Nino knew would have done, ever.

"It always happens when she gets mad. She is always ready to take the head out of anyone on her way. She… she has hurt people before… but it is only for a couple of seconds, it's like something takes over her, she is Marinette but not quite, it is an uncontrollable and angry version of her. That version last a short period of time, not longer than five minutes, then she changes into Ladybug. The change is so abrupt that she doesn't realize she has hurt them." Alya explained the best she could; she knew how confusing could it be "But being honest, I had never seen someone in such bad shape, he must have done something really bad if her bad side did so much hurt"

"This is worse than I thought" Nino said to Wayzz.

"Do you think it could be related to the butterfly miraculous?" Adrien asked "It sure sounds familiar"

Nino didn't answer. He stood up from the couch and started pacing across the room, Wayzz following him. It seemed like they were communicating in silence.

"He felt the remains of an akuma in the alley we found the man" Alya said to Adrien "It is connected, isn't it?"

"He felt an akuma?" Adrien's mouth dropped open. His hands shook, so he turned them into fists.

Alya noticed those little gestures immediately; she had seen Marinette do similar ones many times. So before his breath turned uneven, Alya caught his hands in between hers.

"Breathe, we are going to figure this out" Alya pulled the sweetest smile she could. And it paid back, Adrien seemed to calm down.

"We will" Adrien nodded "So… he felt an akuma?"

"He said it felt like an akuma, the remains of it, that's what he said. I don't know what that means since I don't have the power to feel energies, but… it would make sense, right?"

"I don't know what is supposed to make sense anymore and I'm scared of any theory that involves the butterfly miraculous being reactivated" Adrien rubbed his eyes. The tension of his body was clear once again.

"You have all the right to be afraid" Alya whispered "You went through a lot… I can't imagine how hard it must be for you to live with it"

"Let's not talk about that" Adrien put on a model-smile. Alya didn't point that out, it wouldn't have helped.

"Adrien" Nino called.

"Huh?"

"You are going to your father's studio tomorrow?"

"Yes, Marinette has to do the last fit of my suit. Why?"

"I think we all should go" Nino swirl his finger in a circle, to point them all.

"Your father knows about the miraculous?!" Alya jumped.

"Yeah, I was surprised too" Adrien laughed.

"He knows a lot" Nino said "It would be better if we discussed and analyzed Marinette's situation with him present. So we should go tomorrow"

"I have work" Alya reminded him.

"I do too and also, don't you think Marinette would realize something is going on?"

"I know you guys have work, but this is important, and the sooner we talk the better" Nino sounded as he was begging "And you can distract Marinette as Alya and I go to your father's office"

"Because Adrien's dad just adores us" Alya said sarcastically.

"I'm winning him over" Nino winked at her. Alya rolled her eyes. "C'mon, this is about, Nette"

"I guess Charlene could cover for me for a while" Alya sighed.

"They are going to fire me, I swear" Adrien said.

"They love you, they won't" Nino assured him and gave him a hug.

They planned the whole visit to Gabriel's office.

Nino, with help of Wayzz, wrote on a paper all the points they should discuss, Adrien called to let his dad know that they were going to be at his office tomorrow and Alya called Charlene to let her know she wasn't going to be at the office in the morning. Plagg was messing with Marinette's cat, trying to make him attack Adrien again, something that made him laugh every time. But the cat didn't pay attention to him, which made Plagg mad.

"This cat is stupid" He said as he sat on Adrien's shoulder.

"I know, but Mari loves him" Adrien turned around to look at the cat.

Cat-Adrien was standing outside of Marinette's bedroom door and scratching it.

"He wants Marinette" Alya explained. She took a look at the watch of her phone and looked back at the cat again "And he will have her soon, it normally takes Mari an hour or two to wake up, so she will be awake soon"

"We should go then" Adrien said. Nino nodded in agreement.

"No" Alya shook her head "Nino and I should go, you have to stay"

"Why?" Adrien raised a brow.

"Sometimes she remembers what she was doing before she got angry. If she remembers why she was outside, it is easier to believe that Chat Noir rescued her than me or Nino" Alya said.

At the explanation, Adrien couldn't oppose, he didn't want to either.

Before Alya and Nino left, Adrien transformed so Alya could see it and properly freak out about it.

After that, Adrien was left alone in the room… well not exactly alone, the cat was there, surprisingly not paying attention to him, since he was still focusing all his energy into scratch the door.

Chat Noir sighed.

"C'mon, dumb cat, let's go see Mari"

He opened the door and entered the room.

There was only one light turned on, the one on Marinette's night stand. The yellow light was low, making the room look cozy. The windows were open, letting a small breeze enter the room.

Marinette was on top of the covers of her bed, hugging a big cat pink pillow and covered with a big baby-pink wool blanket. Her head was pressed to the head of the pillow, her mouth barely open , but enough for her to drool a little.

Adrien laughed at this. She was adorable.

Marinette made a weird sound and rolled on her back. She rubbed her eyes with her knuckles and blinked a few times before looking at him.

" _Chaton?"_

"Good morning, _my lady_ " The words came out of Adrien's mouth before he could stop them. And it was too late to take them back, the damage was done.

 **xx**


	15. The One With The Box

Dead; He was dead.

First, he was going to die of embarrassment, guilt or stupidity, whichever killed him faster. Then he was going to resurrect and Marinette was going to kill him, he didn't know _how_ but _somehow_ it was going to happen. Then Marinette would tell Alya, and Alya was going to find a way to bring him back from the death to kill him herself. And then… then he could spend the rest of his dead existence whining about the big mess up of that Friday night.

It was as easy as keeping his mouth shut! As easy as calling her princess as he always did!

But for some reason, after the initial shock, of course, his brain had wrapped around the idea of Marinette being Ladybug. It made so much sense once you connected the dots that he couldn't imagine anyone else as Ladybug now.

Ladybug and Marinette were one and the same, the big loves of his life were really one woman. That was a lot to take in, he had reasons to mess up!

But that didn't change anything, he was stupid and he had ruined everything and—

"What time is it?" Marinette asked, interrupting his mind rambling. She rubbed her eyes and yawned.

"Uh… p-past midnight, I think" Chat's words shook.

"Oh, damn…" Marinette clenched her fists. She threw hear head back and sighed. "I passed out, didn't I?"

"Y-yes" Chat stuttered, still unsure of how things were going to play out for him.

"Ugh" Marinette rubbed her eyes "I hate it so much"

"It is common for it to happen?" Adrien asked, his voice still trembling but winning it's fake confidence back.

He took the glass of water Alya had left on the nightstand and offered it to Marinette, who happily accepted the drink.

"It's not common" Marinette drank a sip of water "But it has happened before"

"Really?" He knew it had happened before, but he wanted to know Marinette's side of the story.

Alya's side was factual, and an essential part of the story; she had witnessed events of it that Marinette never had and never would see, she had seen all the things Marinette always forgot.

Yes, Alya had knowledge of what happened during her transformation into Ladybug and the aftermath, but something she didn't' knew was the before, a part Marinette did have.

"Yes, it's always the same. I'm angry, things get blurry, next thing I know is that my head hurts and hours had passed by without me noticing it" Marinette said "I guess I pass out -no idea why- I went to different doctors, but they can't give me an explication. It's not that bad, really, I usually wake up in my bed or on Alya's couch"

"It doesn't sound like a good thing either, princess" He said to her. His tone of voice made his annoyance spark on his words.

"Maybe this time…" Marinette agreed, after a few seconds of silence "It could have been worse if you hadn't found me since I was on the rooftops… thank you, I could have end up seriously hurt"

"Yes, you could have" Adrien sighed "If you know this happens maybe you shouldn't be playing superhero"

"I don't play superhero" Marinette crossed her arms in front of her chest and turned her head to the side. Her mouth was in a pout and her eyes looking at a death point.

"I didn't mean it like that, you know it" He rubbed his face with the palms of his hands.

When he notices Marinette was still ignoring his sight, he crawled on the bed, closer to her. He began making funny faces as close of her -without invading her personal space- trying to make her laugh.

She could try to ignore him, but Adrien knew she was well aware of him.

Only seconds later, Marinette's angry façade broke and a smile escaped from her lips.

"I know what you meant… I'm sorry. I know you are just worried, but—" She let out the air out of her lungs in a long, long exhale,

"I _am_ worried, always will be; difference to me you don't have magic on your side"

"You may have magic, but you are still a normal person under the suit" Marinette reminded him "Which means that magic can't save you from every dangerous event you could stomp on. I remember the videos of your battle with Papillon, it didn't' seem like magic was doing a great job back then, in that—

She stopped abruptly. A dark and heavy sensation was running through her skin. The feeling was irritating as the sound of nails on a blackboard, like a bitter taste melting in her mouth or the scent of a strong nauseous smell.

When it came to her feelings her ability to feel the world around her ant the emotions of it, turned to a different side; their intensity just multiplied and overwhelmed her, they threw her at the edge of an anxiety attack. But this time as overwhelming as the feeling was, she knew it wasn't her emotions the ones causing the struggles.

She turned to Chat Noir and saw the pain in his eyes as well as on his body.

Of course, it was Chat!

She was stupid and insensible: if she felt dizzy, sad and hopeless whenever she saw any video of the battle, then Chat's emotions were probably ten times more intense.

Marinette wasn't sure how many videos of the multiple ones she had found around the internet she had watched, probably a thousand of them –she always felt like she needed to know everything about that day- but it didn't matter what video she watched, she always felt like a thorn was trying to cut on her heart. It hurt in a different way to anything Marinette had felt before, it was a unique ache that only appeared when she thought of that battle.

And if it was painful for Marinette to think about that battle, she couldn't imagine how hard it was for Chat Noir to remember the whole situation. He had _lived it._

"Chat…" Marinette whispered.

Not sure of what words to use to apologize for her insensitive words she chose to keep quiet, sometimes actions could be louder than words.

She crawled from her spot in bed, throwing the sheets and covers to the side of the bed, to catch Chat Noir in a hug.

He gave the hug back immediately, squeezing her body and pulling her closer. Marinette expected a warm response from him but she didn't expect for his feelings to go bold as a firework show. The feelings she was sensing were loud and bright, and impossible to avoid

Thankfully they were fading into the distance and mixing with soothing waves of love that made her senses calm down, but still, those feelings of warm adoration that Chat Noir was throwing to her, made Marinette felt awful. He had never done anything but love her, he took care of her, he made sure she was safe, she tried to make her laugh when she was sad, he listened to her when she needed to and he would have never been as insensible as Marinette had been a few minutes before.

Damn, why couldn't she restrain some emotions? Why did she have the need to talk without thinking? Why was she always rambling? She knew her impulsivity was dangerous and yet she let it get the best of her _–again-_ hurting someone dearer to her _–again-_ .

Chat Noir's mouth brushed against the curve of her neck. Marinette was impressed by how soft his lips felt, it was as soft as touching a dress made of _habotai._ It was also warm, without being uncomfortable.

His lips brushed against her a few times before leaving a kiss on top of her collar bones.

Marinette smiled at the sweet gesture. She ran one of her hands through his messy hair, trying to show him that she loved him back, and how sorry she was about her words.

But the touching didn't seem enough; it was something normal for them. Marinette and Chat Noir were always touching, it didn't matter what they were doing or if the activity they were realizing needed that level of contact or not, in some way or another they were always touching. It didn't felt weird, on the contrary, it felt like the right thing to do, and that was why it was so natural to be in the other's personal space.

It was so natural that Marinette's actions wouldn't reflect what she was trying say, they would pass as normal behavior, and she didn't want that. So she spoke.

"I'm so, so, so sorry…. I wasn't thinking, it was stupid I… I'm really sorry" She backed down, so she could be able to say her apology looking at him.

Chat Noir gave a little crooked smile, but his eyes didn't glow with the light that was always present.

"Marinette, I know you are, it's okay" His tone of voice wasn't the right one neither.

"Your face doesn't match your words" Marinette's fingertips traveled along Chat's cheeks, making the same path tears would make.

Chat Noir hadn't cried, but Marinette could see that a part of him wanted to break into tears, there was something in his eyes that was trying to stay hidden, she couldn't point a finger at it, but she could see its shadow. But mostly, she felt it, something was going on inside of his mind and he didn't want to share it with her.

"I just need to stop thinking about it" He seemed to smile for real this time.

Marinette nodded, she needed to think about something else too.

She let her arms fall to her sides and by doing it she accidently hit Chat's palms with her own, which wouldn't have been a problem if he didn't have any claws.

"Ouch, " She rubbed her hands together. She frowned at him, but Chat chuckled.

"Want to play handclap's games, princess?"

 _Hey!_ That was a good distraction but one look at her hands was enough to give it another thought.

"You have claws _and_ a ring" She pointed one accusative finger at the black band around his gloves "My hands will be in pain"

"Oh, poor baby girl" He purred, mocking her. "You are scared of losing, admit it"

"What?! You _wish_ I was, I'm only making a fair point here, and how the hell do you lose playing hand-clapping games?"

"Uh, you stop clapping?" Chat Noir crooked a brow "It's obvious, princess. You are scared. C'mon admit it, I won't laugh, cat's promise" He stood three fingers up on the scout greeting and grinned at her.

"I'm not" Marinette pursed her lips and crossed her arms in front of her chest "If we played, I would literally slay you"

"Too many words, not enough actions" Chat Noir sang the song.

That cracked took a deep breath and put her hands up, ready to start playing.

"Start singing, _mon minou_ " Marinette said, a big mischievous grin shining on her lips.

Chat Noir imitated her expression and clapped on Marinette's hands to start the game.

" _Trois petits chats_ " He began singing.

"Unbelievable" Marinette huffed.

" _Trois petits chats, trois petits chats, chats, chats, chats_ "

Marinette kept clapping against Chat's hands. At the beginning, she sang with him, but when the song started to add different verses and Chat Noir changed the tone of his voice according to it, she couldn't do it anymore. She was laughing at how excited he seemed at the game, at the voices and expressions he put to every part of it. It was hilarious and so sweet. He looked like a little kid, and that warmed up Marinette's heart.

" _Lettres d'amour, lettres d'amour, -mour, ,mour! Mour a trois, mour trois, trois, trois petits chats, chats, chats, chat, chat!"_ Chat Noir gave one hard last clap against Marinette's hands. He didn't realize how hard it had been because he stood up from the bed, arms in the air, singing victoriously. And also, Marinette didn't mention how the ring had smashed her fingers.

"I won!"

"I didn't stop! It was a tie!" Marinette rolled her eyes. She shook her hands because they were starting to tickle, then rubbed them against her legs.

"I totally won! Look at you, your hands are tired, I'm obviously the winner, I could go on for hours"

"You are impossible" Marinette huffed "Were you always like this when you played as a kid? How did the other kids put up with you?"

Chat Noir's excitement notoriously died at her comment.

"D-did I said somet-thing wrong?" Marinette stuttered. Why couldn't she shut her mouth!?

"No, no" Chat shook his head. "It's just…. I didn't play with many kids when I was little so…"

"Oh…" Marinette gasped. "Why not, chaton? If it's okay to ask, of course"

"It is" He nodded and smiled kindly, reassuring his answer "I was home schooled and I only had one friend, and she didn't like to play handclaps games… I mostly played with my mom, we could spend hours clapping and singing, for some reason they were one of my favorite things to do"

Marinette's senses bloomed once again, but this time they didn't come from Chat Noir. Yes, she could feel the love when he spoke about his mother, she didn't need supernatural abilities to do so, but this wasn't it. It wasn't happy, it wasn't warm, or electrifying. It made her feel uneasy, it was the sensation you got when a fire alarm ringed… that's what it was, an alarm beeping inside her brain, with lights to go with the sound, telling her to get away, to be safe.

"Was " _trois petits chats"_ , your favorite?" Marinette teased, trying to ignore the uncomfortable sensations she was feeling.

"I can't remember, I knew so many songs, in so many different languages, my mom searched them for me so I could have new ones. "

"She sounds like a great mom" She said.

Chat Noir smiled, looking conflicted.

"She was…" He sighed. "You sometimes remind me of her… you have her smile"

That sounded… _familiar._

"I'm sorry" Marinette said sincerely.

"Me too"

"Do you want to talk about it?" Marinette didn't know when she had died, it could be long time ago, and he could be already used to her being gone, then he wouldn't need to talk about it, but there was the possibility for it to be a recent event and maybe he needed someone to listen to him, and Marinette wanted to be there.

"I would, there's still so many things that I haven't been able to let go, no matter that it's been years since she went missing" _Oh, so she wasn't dead_ "But… for it, I would have to tell you a good amount of personal details and… I…" He sighed "Do you want to know who I am, Mari?"

"No!" It was a reflex reaction. She didn't have the time to think about it, it came out of her mouth so fast that she was sure her brain didn't process it. Something inside of her was screaming that answer, but it wasn't her logical or emotional side, it was like a memory trying to surface "I mean... you shouldn't tell me, I want you to, but you can't"

"Why not?"

"You should know it better than me, superhero 101, you can't reveal your identity, it's dangerous"

"I trust you, princess" Chat cupped her cheek with his hand, making Marinette look right into his eyes.

"No" Marinette closed her eyes and shook her head. She frowned and her nose was in a wrinkle, she was decided to not know.

"You really don't?" He sighed, disappointed. "What if I'm someone you hate? Wouldn't you like to know?"

Adrien didn't want to be someone she hated. He had suffered from Marinette's obvious dislike for him at the beginning, he had heard her talk about the confusing feelings he brought on her and while he really enjoyed to hear her say he was hot and nice, he got bothered when Marinette spoke about him as a stranger. Lately, Marinette was warming up to him, she was being nice to him, only today she had joked around with him!

The need to reveal his identity had come a few times, but he had been scared of what she would think since she seemed to dislike Adrien so much. But now that he knew her identity he really felt that it was his duty to tell her. What if she ended up hating Chat not because he was Adrien but because she had hidden it for so long?

He was scared of her reaction, but he knew that revealing himself was the right thing to do.

"I would never hate you, kitty" Marinette assured him. She took him by his wrist and pressed a kiss on the palm of his gloved hand.

"You can't be sure, Marinette" He said defeated.

He made Marinette let go of his hand. He sighed and let his body fell into the bed. Back against the mattress, looking at the yellow light that Marinette's pink lamp emitted.

Thoughts inside of his mind began to twist. He had received so many information in only one night that he felt like was about to burst into flames. The information was incomplete, and the final piece to kill all the doubts he had inside was right there beside him. But not even Marinette knew the answers to the questions he had, or maybe she did, Adrien couldn't know, and he couldn't ask. If this was old Marinette, old Ladybug, then he was sure he could ask without fear, he knew her well enough to do so… but he didn't know the new Marinette, not completely. Add that to the list of things he didn't know and were eating him from the inside out.

Marinette's body made a thump against the mattress. He felt her hand trace a path along his arm and end on top of his, intertwining her fingers with his.

Adrien turned his head to her, finding big blue oceans full of mystery in front of him. He had shamelessly complimented her eyes a thousand times, telling her he could drown in them; now that he thought about it, he had already drowned, his waves had already embraced every part of his soul, she had managed to let him breathless as Ladybug and as Marinette. He had made him fall in love so deeply three times, as deep as the ocean on her eyes.

He loved her so much.

He had loved her as a superhero, he had loved her as a normal girl, he had loved her as his classmates, as his friend, as the love of his life.

"Hey, Mari" He said, leaning closer to her.

"Huh?" She said low. Her thumb rubbed against his knuckles.

"I love you. Don't scare me like that again" Chat said, raw honesty drenching his words. He was referring to the events of today, as well as the years before, the years he had spent without her. Years of wondering and doubting, years of worrying, years where he would have preferred to say those words.

"I'll try" She looked down, away from his eyes. "I love you, too" Her words trembled a little, but she smiled, assuring her feelings were true.

 _I know you do, bugaboo, you always did._

 **xx**

Marinette changed her position on the mattress for the third time. Her bed, that had never been anything but comfortable had transformed into a hard place to fall.

She rolled on her back, and extended her legs, trying to find a position comfortable enough to keep with her sleep, but nothing worked. She tried to pull the sheets closer to her, and when these didn't move, she opened her eyes to examine the problem.

The problem was a black cat sleeping right next to her, but not the regular tiny old real cat that used to sneak into her bed, but the human superhero disguised as a black cat.

So, it wasn't a cat, it was a guy. A guy was sleeping next to her, a really _hot_ boy was sleeping next to her. It wasn't new to have a guy on her bed, Nathanaël used to spend the night all the time, she wasn't alarmed by it. But this wasn't her boyfriend and as much as she didn't like to admit, this was a stranger. She doesn't know who is behind that mask –she could know, he had offered to reveal himself, but she hadn't accepted the offer- and that made the situation a little bit weird.

She trusted him, he was her friend and he loved her, not only had him tell her that today, but she saw it on his actions; on the way he spoke to her, on the way he looked at her. And she loved him back.

She knew that, but only today she had realized how much she loved him, and maybe that was what made her feel strange with him sleeping next to her.

She was single and she could have gone for Chat Noir at any moment of the night, and yet she didn't.

It wasn't because she was scared, it wasn't because she was insecure, she simply didn't want to.

The feelings were so loud and bold around him that reality became blurry.

Her feelings for Nathanaël had been different for a long time, they didn't have anything to do with Chat Noir, but his presence had made the confusion inside of her grow, it was always like that when the world became louder. It was natural for her to think that she had fallen in love with him, with someone who didn't treat her as she was fragile but still cared about her, with someone she could talk about the superficial aspects of life and joke and minutes later open her heart and toss all her worries to him. It was natural, it was expected but that wasn't what had happened.

As she looked at him, lying on her bed, sleeping peacefully, with his mouth half open and hair messier than the normal; she knew she wasn't in love with him. That's why it was so weird to see him sleeping next to her, because only a few days before she had been wondering what would it be like to be with him like this and maybe… maybe more, and right now she wanted to erase those thoughts.

She loved him -she didn't lie about that- she loved him so much, there was no doubt about it; it _was_ love, but not _romantic_ love.

She couldn't put it into words, or into actions, but she finally understood that her feelings for him were bigger than a little crush or finding him attractive. She still found him extremely handsome, and funny, and maybe in another moment of her life she would be completely and helplessly in love, but it wasn't that moment.

Marinette sat back in the bed.

Her back against the head of the bed, with her legs crossed on top of each other and a pillow in between them. In this position, she had a better look at the guy sleeping next to her.

She contemplated him as he slept, it was funny to see a masked guy in a black custom, sleeping like a baby in between shades of pink and lilac, especially if that guy was constantly trying to come as suave. Which he wasn't, but she wouldn't say that to his face.

As if he was aware of her, he moved closer to her. His head rubbed against her leg, and he rolled on his back, crossing one arm over her legs.

Marinette giggled at this, but stop abruptly at the image in front of her eyes.

The memory was on her head as it had never disappeared from her mind. A younger Chat Noir stood in front of the door of her parent's house. He was introducing himself to her, flirting and acting over the top trying to impress her, and Marinette was making fun of him.

She laughed again at the blissful memory.

"You haven't changed a bit, _minou_ " Marinette ran her fingers through the pieces of blonde wild hair, being careful with the cat ears.

As she played with Chat Noir's hair, Marinette did what she always did when a full memory came back to her. When blurry memories or sensations appeared in her brain, she tried to not think much about it because the most she tried to find an explanation for those sensations she always ended frustrated. But when the memories were vivid and complete, she tried to reach for more.

She played the memory on her head, putting together little details. But something didn't add up.

If Chat Noir was introducing himself why had she made fun of him? Why did it feel like she already knew him? It was impossible and yet that is how it felt.

 _It doesn't make any sense._ She thought. _Except… No, not that again, but…_

Marinette stopped petting Chat Noir and stood up from the bed.

She had tried to ignore the unsettling feeling trying to spread across her heart, it had been there all night, but she had been pushing it away. She didn't want to think about it, but there was no turn back now.

She walked till she stood in front of the door of her closet. She took a big breath before opening it and start searching for the purple shoe box she kept hide at the end of the closet.

It had been a week from the last time she grabbed it and inspected the objects in there, but the situation called for it.

She took off the top and ran her hand around the notebooks, pictures, and memories that this box held.

Inside of the box, there were multiple items she had carefully hand-picked through the years. Pictures, doodles, birthday letters, and notes from Alya, hair pins, bottles of paint, and random items that radiated a peculiar and special energy to her. She didn't remember the story behind all the objects in the box, there was a time when she didn't know anything about the complete box, yet they had always been the most precious objects Marinette could have.

On the left corner of the box, there was a stack with pictures tied with a blue ribbon. She unwrapped and went through the photos until she took one of the pictures in her hands. This picture was the reason why she had opened the box a week ago.

It was a candid picture of her talking to no one else than Adrien Agreste. They were sitting in a park, and Marinette was showing him her sketchbook, her mouth was open so Marinette assumed she was explaining him the design, and while she did that Adrien's mouth was open too, but in surprise. It was a pretty picture, a picture that told Marinette lots of things of their relationship just by looking at their body languages.

She had forgotten that that picture existed, which was strange since it was one of the few photos she had to keep on her apartment. When she chose it she hadn't known who the guy in the picture was, she didn't ask anyone either, she only saw the picture and fell in love with it, so she kept it hidden in the box of shoes with other selected items. She only remembered it last week, and she had freaked out about it for an entire day, but now while she looked at it, she smiled.

Today's talk with Adrien had been so nice and normal. There was still bold feelings around them, bold feelings that made her feel uneasy but Adrien showed to be such a wonderful man that the rational part of her brain had been pushing the sensations of the world away.

Marinette smiled one more time looking at the picture before putting it back in the box. Then she finally took what she was looking for.

The notebook was at the bottom of the box, it was covered with different patterns of fabric, fabric with a nice touch feeling to it. It had been the first manual thing she had done back at the house. She didn't remember how to work with fabrics, but in that moment she needed to do something, so she took a notebook and cut pieces of fabric, creating a pattern on the cover of it.

Because of it, a memory had sparked on Marinette, the first of many to come. And that's why she used it every time a new memory decided to appear on her mind. Every memory that Marinette wasn't certain about ended on that notebook.

She had used half of it already, a few pages were full of words, others had drawings. A few of them had crossed all over them, the words "fake" and "dream" were over multiple pages too. But the king of the notebook, the one who owned more pages was the question mark. And said question mark had a favorite page to appear.

Marinette flipped the pages till she found what she was looking for.

A bright red title welcomed her, with two columns of sentences under it. One had a big "YES" written on the top, the other, with bigger letters said "NO".

Marinette sighed. She gave a look back to the bed, back to Chat Noir. Checking he hadn't woke up, she concentrated again in the notebook.

She picked the pen she kept in the box, took off the cap with her mouth and kept biting while she wrote a few words down on the bottom of the "YES" column. As she did her hand trembled, making her handwriting look as it was shaking too.

Once she was done, she put the cap back on the pen and put it down back in the box. She took the notebook with both of her hands and read the title once again.

 _Could I be Ladybug?_

Then she read what she had just written.

 _Chat Noir called me_ my lady _again_

 **xx**


	16. The One With The Umbrella

A bouquet of delicate pink peonies was on the top of her counter, near a plate of a pair of warm _pain au chocolat_. Beside the plate was a square shaped note with the drawing of a paw bent in two.

Marinette rolled her eyes and bit her lip trying to repress a smile, and failing in the process.

She took the note between her fingers and played with the paper a few times before opening it. Inside, with beautiful and elegant cursive letters a little message was written

" ** _Bonjour, princesse! Have a nice day x"_**

Smiling, she folded the letter once again and put it under a magnet on the refrigerator.

She took one of the scones and gave it a bite. As delicious as they were, she wasn't hungry, so she put them on a Tupperware before preparing herself a coffee, while looking at the window to her side; another cloudy day greeted Paris. Autumn was finally taking his place after the rare sunny and warm days of the month of October.

Later, Marinette paced across her tiny living room, with a mug full of coffee on one hand, and her phone on the other. She was scrolling through the texts on the group chat she shared with Marceline and Sébastien. Both of them were losing their minds over tomorrow's party; Marinette would be lying if she said she was peaceful thinking about it but she had other things in mind that caused her more distraught than the socialite party. She couldn't control what would happen tomorrow, but she knew that she had to be polite and smile and probably things would turn out fine, it was going to be one night, her future on fashion was already on a good path being who and how she was, there was nothing to change, and she was confident in Adrien's suit and her matching dress.

Design and fashion were easy, they were her thing, and this party was about fashion and to celebrate her and her colleagues' designs, it was going to be fine, it was going to be easy.

Easy, easy, easy; She had to focus on the easy things in life, not complicated thought like the ones of last night. No, she had to let those go, far, far away; she had to throw them out of a window like old papers and let them fly in the waves of wind so they could end in unknown corners of the city, forever away from her.

But thoughts weren't papers that she could easily throw away, no, they were loud sounds that couldn't be interrupted as much as you tried. Marinette knew that very well, after all, her life revolved around the understanding of memories and thoughts. You can't control them; they come and go as they please.

And there they were again

Marinette frowned and shook her head from side to side, if she couldn't throw them to a binder, then she could try to rationalize the situation.

Chat Noir calling her my lady, wasn't a big deal, he had done it before. He hadn't realized he had done it but he had called her like that before. After catching a thief, two weeks ago, he had complimented her plan and at the end of the phrase, the nickname had slipped. And sometimes when he had his eyes closed and they were speaking on top of the rooftops he would call her like that, and it had never been a big deal. Marinette had let it pass, it was an understandable mistake. Chat Noir had spent years with Ladybug as a partner; he could mistake Marinette for her if she was –technically- taking her place. Those times he said the nickname, she knew they meant nothing, but last night….

Marinette huffed and rubbed her under eyes with her hands, trying to calm down. This was stressful, as much as she wanted there was no way to deny that yesterday Chat Noir had realized the mistake, and instead of giving an explanation or ask for forgiveness he had stared at her, fear light up a fire inside of his green eyes.

It was that fear the thing that had alarmed Marinette, turning back on her questions about her past and the possibility of being the superhero in the black-spotted red suit.

The speculations had begun six months ago when while digging into one of the boxes in her parent's basement she had found and old sketchbook with designs and doodles. In between all of those old fashion ideas Marinette had have, there were many, many designs following the polka dot patron, but instead of being inspired by the superheroine, they seem to be designed for her to wear.

Doodles and doodles, with notes and measurements at the side. They were wonderful, she was mesmerized by her own art as she always was when she found a new sketchbook –they were the only thing Marinette didn't refuse to look at-. She had kept flipping pages and enjoying her old visions of clothes when she stumbled upon something odd.

Designs with diminutive measurements, that no human could ever wear, and for the shape of it neither could dolls.

A glowing candle had appeared on her mind, lighting up corners of her mind; but the glow was tenuous, not enough to uncover the information she knew she was missing. But it had been enough to plant the seed of doubt.

The scribbling inspired of the superhero outfits made her look for more sketchbooks, trying to find more strange designs like the one she had found. She couldn't understand why she got so obsessed with finding something similar to it, but she couldn't stop. A little voice inside her brain was yelling at, telling her to find the creature to who those designed clothes belonged.

She hadn't found anything, not even a little clue. She should have given up, but she couldn't. An essential part of her life was missing, she was sure of it. It didn't matter if she couldn't remember what, there was something there and it was frustrating to not be able to remember. It was just as frustrating as when you want to say a word, you know the word and still, you can't say the word. It is there but at the same it isn't.

After that day nightmares had made their way back inside of Marinette's nights. Vivid images of events she couldn't place as part of reality or her own imagination. Evocative scenes that she could compare to certain videos of battles she could easily find on the internet. But her point of view of the events didn't seem to be a spectator.

One night, while sleeping at Nathanaël's apartment she had woken up screaming, covered in sweat and shivering. She wasn't able to hide her emotions, and when her ex-boyfriend asked her what got her so shook, she told him everything.

Nathanaël had come up with words she hadn't expected.

He had always given her amazing and beautiful speeches to help her, to support her, so she didn't expect anything but tender words to reassure her that the nightmares she was having were only that, nightmares, a twisted product of her mind. But no.

 _What if those are memories, Marinette? What if you were there in those battles? What if you were Ladybug?_

 **What if.**

That question was the match that had started the fire.

Conversations revolving around those questions never happened again between them, she made sure of it. Not because she thought it was ridiculous –like she had told Nath –but because she had been afraid.

Over the pass of the year, she had been writing down a list to find a similitude between her and the superheroine. She had found more than the ones she had hoped to.

Physically they were one and the same, yet that didn't say much, there were tons of girls in Paris that looked just like her, and with the mask on it could be anyone.

For what Alya said, she had never got akumatized, but that wasn't a major clue either, not every single person had been akumatized. But while discussing this, Marinette had tried to prove a point, telling details of a battle she had witnessed and that she remembered well. Instead of killing her doubts, the little fire had started to build more flames inside of her, because Alya –Alya, who knew every single moment of LB's fights by memory- had been surprised by how detailed Marinette description had been and how she had added events that she did not recall recording or camera, or hearing from other witnesses.

The more she tried to reason to kill her wonder, looking for similarities or differences; every step she took directed her to a new question that made her suspicions of being Ladybug more and more palpable.

It wasn't something she wanted to be, it was scary and strange to think of herself and heroine, nonetheless, it had turned into a real possibility.

Her disappearing and her amnesia were the cherries on top of her crazy theories. Ladybug had evaporated from Paris and Marinette had lost her memory in a mysterious accident she had had on her mysterious trip; the coincidence was too big to let it pass.

Her desire of protecting the city was another point to add to the table. That constant worry and guilt that made her stomach tie in knots at listening to people talk about criminal scenes around the town; she always felt like she had to do something, she didn't know why but she felt it and it was one of the bold emotions that constantly haunt her.

Bold emotions: that was another thing on the YES list. The way she felt the world, how she could sense others people's emotions; that was not normal, and it wasn't a medical condition or an effect or PTSD, it wasn't related to any human thing, it had to be tied to magic, Marinette knew that. And wasn't Ladybug's powers related to some sort of magic? She had heard Alya mentioned it once.

However, theories and suspicions were still on the air, with not solid ground for her to find a definitive answer. She had let it go, grabbed her notebook and saved it inside of the box, and she had forgotten about the subject for exactly three months when a person had found his way back into her life. Chat Noir had made her doubts bloom once again. It was the way he acted around her, the way he spoke to her, how much he trusted her and her ability to catch on with him when they were crossing the bluish rooftops of Paris. How he never questioned her decisions and her plans, how he teased her and how easily he had showed his love for her.

Honestly, she hated when he spoke about Ladybug. She got jealous when he did, and as stupid as it was she couldn't help it. Marinette thought she could be Ladybug, so basically she would be jealous of herself, but it didn't feel like it. She felt jealous because the way Chat Noir described the superhero, she was close to perfection, and Marinette wasn't that. She was jealous of this wonderful heroine, of all the good characteristics and abilities Chat Noir would point out she had. And she wasn't just jealous, she was scared; if she ended up being Ladybug how could she compare to all her glory?

Life was a horrendous twisted mess.

Marinette sighed.

She leaned against one of the walls and looked down at her cat, who had been following her across the room.

"My life is such a big mess, even you realized," She said laughing. She put the mug down, so she would be able to catch cat-Adrien on her arms "C'mon, I'll feed you before I take a shower; you deserve food, an award for not turning this house into a disaster so you could get my attention".

 **xx**

After a hot shower, Marinette's memories and thoughts about last night's worries had faded away, turning into background music that she could only appreciate if she concentrated on them. That was a good thing because she wasn't making any efforts to hear the lyrics of the song her brain was playing.

Instead, she was thinking about a few changes to do in old designs of hers, little details or big additions that could make plain, boring and predictable discarded sketches to turn into something wonderful, worthy of showing.

She was so invested in it; scribbling on a notebook and writing down notes on the side, that she forgot all about the hour. She was diving in an ocean of ideas, too deep to go to the surface. That changed when the doorbell rang.

Marinette blinked fast, coming back to reality.

She stood up fast, forgetting her cat was on her lap, making him jump and meow angry, which made Marinette's heart beat faster than it already had been thanks to the sound of the bell.

Who could be knocking at her door so early in the morning? Her parents were busy at the bakery, Alya was probably on the metro on her way to the office –if she hadn't slept in the office- Sébastien and Marceline weren't early bird, so it couldn't be them either.

A few steps before the door, Adrien's face appeared on her mind. It was probably him.

Marinette opened the door, ready to ask what was he there, they were going to see each other in a few hours, then his reason must had been important if he was coming to see her now- but she did not.

Adrien was smiling, his natural beauty glowing just as bright as yesterday, and all those days before, the only difference was the pair of Garamond glasses with a brown frame.

"You wear glasses, " Marinette said. Still focusing on how the glasses marked some features of his face, giving him a mature look. It was a strange look on him, but he still looked gorgeous.

"Good morning to you too, Mari" Adrien smiled amused; a tender look on his green eyes "Yeah, I wear them to read, I was finishing grading a few papers and I forgot I was wearing them" He pushed the glasses up his nose and narrowed his eyes as he did the motion. A familiar sensation ran through Marinette's skin.

She narrowed her eyes and leaned her head to the side. There was something about the way that Adrien looked right now that made Marinette feel at home. The bold sensations and warnings around him were running away, and something stronger was trying to cross the portal to her mind.

"You don't like them?" He asked, a shadow on his voice "I can take them off if—

"Don't take them off!" Marinette yelled, regretting it immediately "I mean, I didn't say it as a bad thing, but you can take them off if you want to, but it's not that they look bad, they look pretty good, you have the style to pull them off and they made your eyes look really pretty, well they are pretty and but I… I'm gonna shut up"

"Seven years have passed and you still look adorable when you ramble" Adrien's eyes opened in fear "I… I wasn't supposed to...What I meant was—

"Let's pretend none of us said anything, deal?" She suggested.

"Deal" Adrien nodded grinning.

"So what drags you at my door this early in the morning?" She asked. She crossed her arms in front of her and leaned on the door, waiting for his answer and still trying to figure it out these new sensations he was bringing.

"I didn't hear you go out this morning, so I thought I could offer to drive y since we are going to the same place" He laughed nervously.

Two weeks ago, Marinette's answer would have been a rotund no, but Adrien had won a place in her heart, and especially today she was feeling eager at the possibility to be with him, something had changed her perception of Adrien, and she was going to discover what that was.

"That's really nice, thank you" Marinette smiled; accepting his invitation.

"Great" Adrien smiled like a little kid who had just been told he could eat all his candies "So, ready to go?"

Marinette ran her fingers through her, still wet, hair.

"Are you in a hurry?" Marinette asked.

"No, I'm skipping early classes because I have a meeting with my dad. But you have to be there in, half an hour?" Adrien shook his hand to make the watch on his wrist go back to its place so he could look at the time "Yeah, half an hour. And no matter how much my dad likes you, he doesn't stand people being unpunctual"

"Half an hour?!" Marinette pulled Adrien by his wrist, twisting his hand to get a better look at the watch "How did it get so late?!"

"You got entertained?" Adrien guessed "Good breakfast?"

"No time to discuss," Marinette said and ran back to her apartment and then began screaming to Adrien from there "I grab my things and we run, I can't be late!"

"Don't worry, we won't be!" Adrien assured her.

 **xx**

"We are going to be late" Adrien sighed. He softly hit his head with the handle of the car.

"I'm fired" Marinette whispered. She stared at some death point on the horizon "I'm so fired, all my efforts gone! I'm gonna get fired, he is going to hate me, I'll never be a successful designer, he will pull me off of Vogue!" Marinette's face was contorted in fear; she was pulling her hair and shaking her head to the sides.

"Don't be dramatic, M" Adrien said with a wide smile. Marinette had always built crazy scenarios inside of her head, and it was fun to hear them, it didn't matter what they went about.

"Tell me he won't be mad. Look right into my eyes and tell me he won't be mad" Marinette ordered. She pulled the collar of his shirt, bringing him closer. A reaction unlike her, with meant she was extremely worried. "See? You can't!"

"Marinette" With his hand, Adrien covered the hand she had on his collar "Breathe, everything will be alright. Yes, he will be mad, but it's just one time, also you can put the blame on me if you want to"

"Ugh," Marinette huffed "But it isn't your fault, it's Paris' stupid traffic fault!"

Marinette crossed her arms and put them on top of the glove compartment and then pressed her head.

"Things couldn't get worse could they?" Marinette asked. Wasn't her life messy enough? What had she done to deserve all of this?

Suddenly she heard Adrien laugh.

"You are laughing of _my_ _misery_?" Marinette said, faking a sob "Is this because I mocked you yesterday?"

"No, no" Adrien giggled once more "You just said "could things get worse?" and it started drizzling" He pointed out to the front.

Marinette looked up, finding in front to the windshield were teardrops were rhythmically falling. Slowly intensifying in strength, more and more teardrops appeared in front of them.

"Of course it started raining" Marinette threw her hands in the air "Because my life just needs more movie clichés!"

Adrien laughed louder, and Marinette couldn't stop herself from giggling, too.

"Don't laugh of my disgrace!" She said, hitting his shoulder playfully.

"I'm sorry, but things did turn worse, it's hilarious in a sad way, I'm familiar with that kind of thing so my amusement comes from a good place, I swear." He said in between laughs.

"Well really, things didn't get worse—"Marinette shook her head "It will make the traffic worse, but I like it when it rains, so things are not so bad"

"That's right, you have always liked rain" Adrien's eyes widened "I don't think I ever asked you, I just enjoyed seeing you happy every time it rained, but I never did my research"

Marinette's cheeks glowed in scarlet, and she drifted her sight away from him.

The smile Adrien was gifting her was precious and tender, and the worst part was that his eyes were smiling too, and there was nothing more beautiful than Adrien Agreste giving her a real smile, a smile that not only consisted of lips but his whole face. In that moment, Marinette knew an old part of her still remembered Adrien, because that smile shouldn't make her fluster.

"I just like rain" She whispered.

"Okay…" Adrien said.

Silence reigned after his words. They made an advance on the line of cars, and drive through a few streets without problems until they reached the roundabout around the Arc de Triomphe. And they were stuck again.

The drizzle had turned into pouring rain. The teardrops running and splashing against the windshield of the car were Marinette's focus as they waited for the cars to move.

Teardrops danced and swirled in different directions, only to be stopped of their ways by the wiper washers.

She extended one of her arms to the glass, to be able to touch it and follow with her fingertips a drop's path on the window

"Rain makes me feel at ease" She whispered, finally answering to Adrien's question "I remember that when I was little I would sneak out of the house to go play in the rain, jump in puddles and just do whatever I liked outside. My parents tried to stop me many times but I always found a way to sneak out, or I took longer on my walk home to enjoy the rain; so my mother bought me the warmest and biggest coat I had ever seen, I could barely move on it" She giggled "And when I wasn't playing in the rain I could stare it on the windows. My dad and I would look at the teardrops falling from the window and bet on which drop would be the first to go all the way down the window"

"How does that work?" Adrien asked, leaning as close to her, as it was possible in the tiny car.

"You choose a drop and wait for it to finish its path if your drop falls first you win," Marinette said, standing the obvious.

"Cool, let's play!" Adrien said excitedly.

"You are driving, Agreste" She reminded him.

"Do you see us moving?" Adrien crooked a brow at her.

Marinette smiled, amused.

This guy was unbelievable, he had all the cards to be a complete asshole and he was a ray of sunshine, a little kid who got excited by the most minimum things in life.

"Alright, alright. That's my drop!" Marinette pointed one of the drops on the top right of the windshield.

"That's mine!" Adrien shouted, pointing to a drop really close to the one Marinette chose.

"Don't miss it, or you will lose" Marinette warned.

"I won't lose, my dear Mari"

They started watching with extreme concentration their respective drops, following its' irregular path across the glass, turning bigger and bigger every time another drop stumbled in the way. Until the first drop touched the end of the glass, said drop belonged to Adrien, who couldn't stop his excitement and had celebrated by honking and scaring the hell out of Marinette.

Ten minutes later, after watching what seemed like a thousand of drops roll down the glass, getting their fingers cold of following the drops' paths, and multiple celebrations of Adrien (honking included) the cars started to move, finishing the game.

"I won!" Adrien exclaimed. Hands in the air, celebrating doing a little victory dance as seated, which made it ridiculous.

"Focus on the road!" Marinette took the handle, terrified of the lack of hands on it "And you did not! God you remind of someone when you act like this"

"I won the all around!" Adrien gasped, he looked insulted."This person must be a quite amazing then"

"Yeah, he is" She nodded, and gave a little sided smile to him "But let's focus on the subject here: The last one to win wins all, everybody knows it" She refuted.

"What? No, don't you watch sports?" Adrien huffed.

"Tons and this is no sport" Marinette's lips drew back in a snarl " My game, my rules, I won"

"That's cheating! I was never informed of these rules"

"You never asked" She grinned triumphantly.

"You are just mad because ye—" Adrien stopped mid sentence. He frowned and pursed his lips.

"Because?" Marinette asked. She made a move with her hand, encouraging him to talk.

"Nothing, it was something dumb, don't you worry," He said, giving a dashing smile, that made Marinette uncomfortable, she could feel the lie on his words. "I still won, though"

"Whatever you say" She rolled her eyes.

"C'mon, Mari, just admit it" He wiggled his eyebrows at her.

"Listen, Adrien—" She was interrupted by Adrien's phone ringtone.

And that was the first hint of luck in all her week because she had been about to say mean words that Adrien didn't deserve, only to stop the uncomfortable sensation his lie had made her feel.

"We are here." Adrien said, cutting the uncomfortable silence.

"Finally" Marinette took her bag and her folders, ready to get out of the car. Looking at the sketchbooks and then to the front, where the rain fell on top of the glass as strong as bullets would, she sighed.

"Great, I will not only be late but I will be drenched. The water will ruin my sketches" She lamented.

Adrien grinned at her, and if he hadn't spoken as soon as he did, Marinette would have punched him. Ruined designs were nothing to joke about!

"Don't worry, I have one in the trunk." Adrien said "Just wait here as I get it"

"You are going to get all wet on the walk there." Marinette said low.

"I'm a tough cookie" He winked. Marinette blushed one more time. That motion was way too familiar, but she couldn't study it for long since he went out of the car almost immediately.

Adrien was nice, so, so nice.

She had to figure it out why her senses went all crazy, she had to figure it out, she had to know who Adrien Agreste really was, what he meant to her. She had to.

She had to understand why today he wasn't affecting her as he always did, she had to find an answer, she had to know more than what he knew about him, she needed more information than just knowing that she used to have a crush on him. This was top priority.

Three knocks on the window made her turn her head to the direction of the sound. Adrien was waiting for her outside.

Marinette opened the door carefully, grabbing her back, folders, and sketchbooks closer to her side, extending her hand to catch the hand Adrien was offering in help.

"Can you carry all that stuff?" He asked.

She could, but maybe it wasn't the best option if she walked with important designs on her hands when it was raining and the floor was slippery. Her clumsiness made her appearance at the worst moments.

"Uh…" She babbled

"Let's exchange, I'll take your stuff and you hold the umbrella. Sounds right?" He offered.

"Sounds great" Marinette nodded.

Still sitting, she gave Adrien her sketchbooks first. Then she made her way out of the car.

Already outside she lent him the rest of the folders, and she kept her bag.

Adrien then, extended his arm offering her the umbrella. Marinette did the same motion to catch the handgrip when her sight crashed into Adrien's eyes.

Her breath got caught in her throat and time stopped.

Drops of water ran through his hair and down his face, touching him as they were trying to remember his features; around his cheek bones, his strong jaw. They ran at the side of his brows, dropped from the bridge of his nose and made their way across his full lips. The soft rays of sunlight that leaked from the clouds hit him, what only made the teardrops on him shine brighter.

He was a vision and Marinette couldn't help but look; a vision that she had looked at before.

 ** _Adrien…_**

 **xx**

 **THANK YOU FOR THE COMMENTS I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW TO REPLY?**

 **BUT YOU CAN FIND ME ON TUMBLR : .COM AND ON AO3 AS LILAACTARS**


	17. The One With The Bright Light

Marinette took a pair of scissors and cut the excess of black string in the needle.

She stitched the lapel of the jacket, watching her hands move as she pierced the needle through the thick leather fabric on the borders. She followed the thread sink like a swimmer in a pool, going down, going up, leaving its' marked path on the fabric.

Her hands, the needle, the black string: that was all it mattered right now. Or better said, that was all Marinette wanted to matter in that moment.

It had always been easy to lose herself in work. Once she started it was hard to make her stop, every project she worked had her full attention, all of her effort and her thoughts only revolved around it. That's how her working progress was—until today.

And it wouldn't have been a horrible problem if she knew how to hide her emotions, but that wasn't the case. Marinette had come to her workspace with a neon sign engraved on her forehead. And it didn't help that Adrien wore a matching one, on his face was plastered the confusion he had to Marinette's change of behavior.

She had tried to brush it off, play around and lie about it. When she walked to her workstation, and they asked for the first time if she was okay, she said she had been afraid of Gabriel's reaction to her being late –Nathalie had let it pass without thinking it twice, she even asked if she was feeling alright- Then when asked one more time after Nathalie's words, she said she was nervous about tomorrow, but only a few of her colleagues believed her, Marceline and Sébastien knew her better, and they had begged for the truth as Adrien changed clothes a few meters from them, behind a room divider. She created thousand of excuses, but deleted them as soon as they popped out on her mind, because none of them were believable, not for people that knew Marinette, so she had, to tell the truth—well, a half truth.

She admitted she was nervous about working with Adrien now that the suit was finished, she was scared that he wouldn't like it or that the suit wouldn't fit him perfectly –which was impossible, she had made more measurement test on him that she had done in any other model on her whole life-.

They didn't believe her, but they didn't say anything. Marceline went back to her workstation and Sébastien sat on a stool next to Marinette's as he sketched new wedding dresses and asked for her opinion.

But now they both had returned, because Marinette was working on the suit while Adrien was wearing it. They had their eyes wide open, following Marinette's moves, waiting for something to happen and reveal the true reasons behind her odd behavior.

The situation was ludicrous if she wasn't involved in the situation, if she was only a spectator, she knew she would be laughing, or dying of secondhand embarrassment. She was a wrecking mess and Adrien was stiff and clearly uncomfortable, and her friends didn't help the situation. Oh, dear, none of this would have happened before.

Before she started to realize that Adrien was a nice person; before she promised herself to get to know him; before she got to know him a little and saw how kind, funny and smart he could be. Before she decided to get on his car; before the stupid, stupid rain that made necessary the use of an umbrella; before her feelings fell on top of her like piano's did in old cartoons.

 _Before, before, before;_ How good did that sound?

It sounded perfect, but Marinette had already learned that life wasn't perfect.

She had to deal with these feelings just like she dealt with the daily strange and bold emotions that revolved around her. _But this is about Adrien. Adrien is the strangest mix of feelings you had ever had to face…_

Marinette sighed, losing her focus point and as consequence, the needle didn't pierce the fabric but Marinette's skin.

"Ouch!" Marinette shouted, bringing her finger immediately to her mouth.

"Alright, Marinette, you have, to be honest with us: what is going on with you today? This is the fifth time you have pinched yourself, that's unlike you,"

"Nothing is wrong, I'm just naturally clumsy"

"For everything but stitching," Sébastien shook his head " _Marebear_ , let us help you, something is seriously wrong with you today. I can tell, 'Celine can tell and handsome boy can tell"

The chuckle that came from Adrien's mouth made Marinette arch her back like a cat.

"Please stop, " Marinette said. The cordiality of her words was only on the definition of them because her voice and her eyes had shot that as an order. Marinette's brows crashed together, she was biting her lower lip like she was trying to restrain herself from saying something else.

"We are sorry, Mari," Adrien whispered. He hadn't been so persistent on figuring out what had her so nervous, so it was a surprise that he was the first one to apologize "But something has been bothering you since we arrived here and it worried us. We will stop, but I think Sébastien will agree with me when I say that we are here if you need to speak about it" The designer nodded, assuring his agreement to the model's words.

"I know that," Marinette said, still defensive. "But you are overwhelming me"

"I'm so sorry, _mon chéri"_ Sébastien's lips pouted, he wrapped Marinette between his arms, which made the girl's anger evaporate.

"Don't do it again and it'll be okay" Marinette patted his back before breaking the hug "Adrien can you turn around?"

"Sure"

Marinette

"Wow!" Marceline shouted from her workstation.

The sound of scissors falling, string rolling and the bench falling was loud enough to make everyone cringe but Marceline didn't bother to apologize, that was her and all her co-workers were used to it after ten months of working together.

"You like?" Marinette asked, with stars in her eyes. Marceline's opinion had become very important to her. Her style was different and the way she worked was a contrast to her, so to have a review from her meant the world to Marinette.

"Of course I do, it's elegant, perfect, black" Marceline leaned her head, giving Marinette an are-you-serious? look. "What I'm impressed is about handsome boy here"

"Do you guys know I have a name, right?" Adrien crooked a brow and displayed and amused smile that hid real worry behind it.

Marceline huffed.

"Do you, mini Gabriel?" Marceline chuckled.

"Hey, " Adrien answered offended.

"C'mon! I saw it from my desk, you look just like him!" Marceline rounded Adrien as he pointed him out in different embarrassing postures.

Marinette stepped down, too intrigued by her friend's comment to feel nervous checking him out.

" _O,h mon Dieu_! He totally does! The glasses are the top notch" Marinette laughed too.

Adrien looked embarrassed, face down, eyes on his feet and his hands curling at his sides. But still, he had a genuine smile on his face.

"You think so?" Adrien asked low.

"You don't see it?" Marceline asked back.

"Uh, I—" He said, giving a glance in the mirror to his left. He twirled on his heels and saw his reflection one more time "—guess I do?" Adrien answered, pushing his hair back; trying to increase the resemblance to his father "People usually say that I look like my mother"

"Oh," Marceline said in understatement "Well, I couldn't have guessed that. I've never seen your mom, you know"

Marinette's heart skipped a beat. She ignored it and focused her sight on following Adrien's steps to her desk, where he had left his phone.

"Here" He announced, coming back to her side and lending his phone to Marceline.

"She is beautiful" Marceline gasped "I can see the resemblance, but when you were younger you looked more like her… you have her colors and when you smile to Marinette you do that cute smile"

Marceline gave the phone to Marinette, pointing at Mrs. Agreste smile but that wasn't the first thing Marinette focused in.

She saw her long blond hair flowing with the wind, big green eyes full of sparkling joy –they shined like Adrien's did- then she saw the caring smile Marceline had pointed out. As a whole she did look like Adrien, she seemed to glow—

 _The only thing Marinette had been able to see were her hands, and only when she placed them close to her collar bone, from where purple light radiated. But now, it had changed._

 _The darkness of the place had been left behind and a bright incandescent white light, so instead of not being able to watch where she was going for the lack of light, now she was blind for the apparition of it._

 _Too nervous to continue she stood there, eyes closed and heart bumping against her chest as fast as derailed train. Holding her breath, she counted till ten._

 _She could do this, she could do this._

 _She touched her ears, an old habit of her to remain calmed. She did it to feel the energy coming from the earrings, the life inside of them that gave her power._

 _She sighed and got ready to keep going to where the light came from._

 _She took two steps first. Nothing happened, nothing changed._

 _She took two more and… the voice was louder. She took another one… louder, louder, louder._

 _"_ Marinette?" Marceline's hand was on her shoulder "Something wrong?"

"Huh?" Marinette blinked fast, trying to come back to reality "It's nothing, I spaced out" She smiled.

"Sure?"

"Yeah, yeah. What we were talking about?"

"Adrien's mom" Marceline showed her the phone once again, swapping through the pictures on the model's gallery "Now we know from all the pretty came from"

She saw the picture, a new one, but it was the same woman. She was wearing a light blue hat, her hair was down and her curls ran on top of her shoulders. On her neck she… what was that?

 _RUN, RUN, RUN, RUN!_

 _Marinette couldn't move. The shocking revelation in front of her had caused all her muscles to go numb._

 _She knew who she was looking for, she knew it was connected to supernatural reasons and yet this was a surprise. She wasn't expecting this._

 _A powerful energy was pulling from her to come closer accompanied of a sweet velvety voice who invited her to take a step forward and hug her. She wanted to do that. it was the voice that had been tormenting her in her sleep, that sweet melody that had kept her awake at night because it was unknown_.

 _RUN, RUN, RUN, RUN, RUN, RUN, RUN!_

 _The other voice intercepted her mind once again, soft and warm, alike to the other one but more… human._

 _Because it was human! It wasn't a ghost it was a real person in front of her!_

 _Well, looking it closely, as she narrowed her eyes trying for the light not to blind her she could see a woman, a beautiful woman. She was tall and thin and she was glowing._

 _The intense white light covered all of her body and it seemed to come_ from _her. It was like the sun was burning inside of her and letting it colors burst through her. It would've been an alluring vision if the light hadn't been so bright, Marinette was sure of that._

 _It was the combination of the human essence and the supernatural one that made impossible to ignore the light and walk away. That's why Marinette couldn't move because the energy was telling her to take a step closer to it, but something inside Marinette's head was creating a warning sign, asking for her to go back to where she came from. And the human voice was fulfilling that instinct._

 _"RUN!" That wasn't inside her mind anymore. Though the voices she had been hearing didn't belong to her, they had never felt like actual voice, but the kind of voice you hear in your mind, you can know what they are saying and feel how they sound but you are not really listening. Now, she was listening._

 _"Go away! Run, before it's too late!"_

 _"But—" She extended her to the light_

 _"No!"_

 _A powerful force held her arm. It pulled so strongly like it was ready to rip her apart like she was a little rag doll ready to fall apart piece by piece._

 _In little jumps, the energy ran from her arm to the rest of her body and pain began to grow, pumping through her veins and dancing on her skin like if she had been stepped on with shoes made of pointy glass._

 _Little needles all over her, pressing at the same time against her skin, piercing deep into her skin till they reached ligaments, muscles, veins, and arteries. Every part of her that could hurt was hurting._

 _She didn't move her feet, but she stepped closer than before. The energy was pulling from her like a strong magnet._

 _"NO!" The voice shouted and the energy weakened._

 _Marinette could feel and control her body again. She took a step backward, still curious of what magic entity was in front of her she kept her eyes open hoping she could see the woman inside of the light with more precision._

 _"What are you doing?! Run away from here! Run, run, run! Forget about me!"_

 _"I ca—" One more time the energy took over her, this time it was pushing her away._

 _"Run!" The energy struck, so quickly, hitting Marinette's chest and throwing her to the ground._

 _It was pulling, it was pushing, pulling, pushing._

 _Marinette had hit her head against the floor, that had hurt, but the burning sensation on her chest was what hurt the most._

 _A purple light was in front of her, crashing against the blinding white. It was beautiful to witness, but she knew it wasn't meant to be seen as a show, it was a fight._

 _"Run, Ladybug! Forget about me! Forget everything!"_

 _One moment there was so much light, the other it was all darkness. Darkness and pain._

 **xx**

He had heard that scream before. In a different scenario, in a different time of the day and probably for a different reason but it had been that same voice that had screamed with the same desperation.

Her scream had echoed through the room like a sonic bomb. It had been loud and it had been painful.

Marinette had been up one minute and the next her body dropped to the floor like a dead weight. The knees crashed against the ceramics but she didn't show any signs of the pain a person should have felt. Her hands reached for her hair, pulling pieces of her scalps and all her body trembled just like an earthquake would. It didn't take long for the tears to begin stream down her eyes and for the screams to continue.

Marceline stood in her place like a statue, Sébastien came running from his workstation and Adrien took a step to get close to Marinette.

"Take off the jacket"" Marceline and Sébastien said at the same time.

Adrien snapped his head back at them, surprised by the request. How could they still think about clothes when Marinette was shaking and crying in front of them?

But they didn't back off with the request. Marceline had her hands extended, ready to help him.

"We can't mess up her work…" Marceline said what sounded like an explanation to her weird request. He understood that said explanation had a deeper meaning than just the surface of taking care of the clothes she had sewed.

Without taking off his eyes of Marinette he let Marceline helped him out to get out off the jacket. And every second of it felt like a millennium.

He ran to Marinette and kneel in front of her, counting to ten and keeping a steady respiratory rhythm, he couldn't allow his brain to mess up things and send him to a panic attack too.

Adrien didn't touch her. He didn't know how she could react.

When he got panic attacks, he felt safer if Plagg touched his forehead, reassuring him he wasn't alone, but he didn't know if Marinette felt well being touched, maybe, on the contrary, it could make things worse.

So he didn't do anything. He was kneeling in front of her, waiting for a sign to let him know how to proceed.

"Do any of you know what to do?" Adrien asked, lifting his gaze to the other three designers on the studio, whose names he didn't know, he remembered Marinette naming them once or twice, but their names didn't make much of an impression to stay in his brain. The fact that they looked entertained by Marinette's situation made him want to know their names, badly for them, he didn't have good intentions with that wish.

They shook their heads, fear washing over their faces.

"Then—"Adrien inhaled deeply, trying to keep his cool but looking back to the three designers, he decided he didn't care "—get the fuck away from here!"

Sébastien let out a nervous laugh.

"Has this ever happen before?" Adrien asked, looking up to catch Sébastien sight, he seemed to be in better shape than Marceline.

"Not like this" He answered scratching his green hair. "Alya always talks to her…"

"About what?!"

"Anything, she says hi, describes clothes, the pla—

Adrien wasted no time.

"Hi, Mari, it's me, Adrien, we are at my father's headquarters right now, where you work. You are working on a suit for me right now, it's black with shades of silver, I wear a black shirt underneath with a turtle neck, it didn't work on me at first but you fixed it!" He tried to sound excited while keeping his voice soft "I'm wearing it now and you are wearing a really cute outfit too! You are wearing black too, your sweater, it looks soft and it has a circle cleavage, it fits you quite well… you are wearing a skirt too, it's red, A cut, if I'm not wrong that's how it is called and—

Adrien stopped when Marinette's hands dropped to her side and she lifted her head.

She opened her mouth but whatever word she was trying to formulate didn't leave a sound, her mouth arched and her lips twitched but nothing came out.

"Marinette?" Adrien asked, staring right at her purple iris. Just like that night.

Marinette threw herself at Adrien's arms.

He gasped and could hear the same surprise gesture behind his back coming from Marinette's friends.

The girl was always reluctant to be around him, always looking uncomfortable and a little too careful. This hug didn't show any of that.

She wasn't hugging him to find comfort; she was looking for a safe shred. The way her arms wrapped around him were more than a simple show of affection, she was holding to him as if she was about to fall off a cliff's edge.

The way she was hugging him not only left in evidence how much she needed to feel love but that she could only find it in his arms.

This wasn't Marinette hugging Adrien. This was Ladybug hugging Chat Noir.

He had confirmed it from experience, a little part inside of Marinette associated him with Chat Noir and part of her brain knew that they were one and the same. That's what was going on in that moment. That little light inside of Marinette –that got the clarity all of her other synaptic connections lacked off- was moving and commanding her actions.

She was still shaking and tearing up, but now Adrien knew that it was safe to touch her. He hugged her back and let her hide her face in the crook of his neck. He caressed her hair and rubbed his thumb against her temple.

"It's okay, princess, you are safe" He whispered in her ear "You are safe, Marinette. You are in Paris, at your workplace, surrounded by people who love you and admire you. You are safe, you are safe, _you are safe_ "

Marinette's grip turned stronger but her hard trembles began to fade away and as well did her tears. She was shivering, but it wasn't exaggerated as before, it was a consequence of her loud sobs.

When Marinette's breath turned back to slow gasps, Adrien shifted the position of his arms, he held her tighter from her back and passed his arm behind Marinette's knees and lifted her from the ground.

"I'm taking her somewhere quieter" Adrien announced to Marinette's friends.

Midway to his way to a conference room he hoped was empty Nathalie stepped on his way.

"What happened to her, Adrien? Why didn't you call me?" One of the funny things about Nathalie it's that it didn't matter how strict she wanted to look in front of him, she always ended up sounding like a worrying mother. She could fool him when he was a teenager, but not anymore.

"I could handle it, I'm taking her to one of the conference rooms, is that alright?" Nathalie nodded "If I need anything I promise I'll let you know"

"Better do" Nathalie gave a little smile. She guided him to the room and opened the door for him.

The room was wide and luminous, with an oval table made of glass and wood in the middle surrounded by chairs. At the left corner of the room, close to the windows, there was a white sofa.

"Can we close the curtains? Not completely, just a little" Nathalie didn't answer but she made her way to the window and did as he had asked. "Thank you, Nath"

Adrien left Marinette on the sofa, at first he wondered if to let her lie across it, but Marinette was more conscious of her surrounding at the seconds passed so he decided to sit her. He still kept close to her, holding her by her waist, her hands still on his shoulders.

"It's okay, Mari, I'm here" He kept whispering reassuring words, hoping they would find their way into Marinette's brain.

"Too… bright" Marinette whispered, and then gibberish phrases followed those words. Marinette's lips moved to fast and her eyes were wide open letting fear found shred on them. He tried to follow but she spoke fast and low, it was impossible to get something from it until she said his name. And she blinked once again.

"Adrien,breathless" Marinette said breathlessly. He felt how her hands moved around his shoulder before digger her nails into them. She was still a little out of the world.

"Yes, Mari?"

One more time, she looked ready to say something but nothing came out of her mouth and that coincided with the return of the blue ocean on her eyes, leaving the lilac skies behind.

"A…Uh…"

"Don't worry, you don't need to say anything if you don't feel like. No explanations, no excuses, if you don't want to talk that's fine"

Marinette gave a little assuring smile, eyes closed and feelings plastered on her face.

"Adrien… when you passed me the umbrella—"She gasped"—you triggered something and I think, I think I'm gonna start remembering you"

Those weren't the world Adrien was expecting for her to say if she decided to talk. She was brushing off the problems with happy conversation.

That was okay, Adrien wasn't going to push for more.

"Really?"

"Really" She nodded. Pressing her hands against her face, she rubbed her forehead with her fingertips.

"Your head hurts?" Adrien asked. He extended one arm to touch Marinette but stopped midway, unsure if that was the right thing to do. Yes, she had hugged him and he had carried to a silent room but that didn't mean that he had the right to touch her. Not as Adrien, not yet at least.

"Yeah, it always happens when… well you, know" Marinette waved her hand around her, the gesture made Adrien smile in amusement. "For how long I was out?"

"Didn't count but it could've been around ten minutes" He answered, Marinette didn't seem to hear, she was still rubbing her forehead, eyelids pressed together. "It used to happen to me. When my attacks lasted longer I always ended up with horrible headaches"

Marinette eyes popped open with wonder and looked at him astonished.

"You?" Adrien nodded "Why?" Marinette covered her mouth with her hands. "I'm sorry, that was rude, I shouldn't have asked"

"It's not rude, you didn't ask with malicious intentions" Adrien grinned at her. "Do you want an aspirin?"

"No, I'm fine or I will be after an hour. I'm used to it so it's not a big deal anymore"

"Is the—

"Marinette" The new voice in the room interrupted him.

On the doorstep stood his father, displaying a stiff posture and worry in his eyes. Marinette on the other side was mortified, the blush on her cheeks spread to her nose and the rest of her face.

"Sir, " Marinette said, standing off the sofa and brushing the inexistent dust on her skirt.

"I heard what happened. Do you think you can still work today?" Adrien rolled his eyes. That phrase showed how much he cared about Marinette, it really did but still, he wished his father could have selected a better phrase. Was it really that hard to say "are you okay?"

"Of course, sir" Marinette nodded furiously. What Adrien considered a bad choice, since she had a headache.

"I see you took off the jacket,of," Gabriel said to Adrien "Good call, we can replace the shirt but not that jacket" He walked closer to his son. Grabbing the neck of the black shirt Adrien was wearing and then following the path of Marinette's tears and little stains of makeup on his shoulder.

"Yeah, Marceline and Sébastien ordered me to" He explained. He wouldn't have given that much importance to that comment if Sébastien and Marceline didn't benefit from the explanations.

Gabriel nodded.

"Please go back to work Marinette, I'll ask Francesca to get you an aspirin and something to eat"

Marinette looked ready to refuse, but she realized fast that it hadn't been a question, it had been an order.

"Thank you, sir" Marinette nodded and walked to the door, turning around once she was out "Thank you, Adrien"

"It was nothing, Mari"

Gabriel only waited for Marinette's step to fade away to begin talking. Adrien was surprised that he had been able to wait for that long.

"What happened? Nathalie comes to my office and says you are carrying an unconscious Marinette and then two of my best interns come to me looking as pale as ghosts asking if Marinette is okay"

"She wasn't unconscious" Adrien lifted a finger, marking the point "But something weird happened indeed… it's better if I tell you when Nino and Alya arrive, father"

"Your friends are already here," Gabriel said. "Mademoiselle Césaire is having a meltdown in my office and has threatened me with cutting my head off and yours if something bad had happened to Marinette"

"I thought you were lying there for a moment but that sounds like Alya" Adrien grinned.

"Should we go then?" Gabriel lifted a brow at his son.

"I'll change my clothes and I'll go"

"Don't waste time flirting, it seems like we have more to talk about that what we planned"

Adrien left the room without answering and with his cheeks burning in scarlet.

 **xxx**

 **FLASHBACKS! Yes, we are in that moment where I need to write flashbacks!**  
 **Sorry to everyone who thought something major was going to happen between Adrienette, not yet, not yet ;)**

 **There're a few things I wanted to clarify/say :**  
 **1) You may have noticed (or not) that Sébastien's hair color changes, that's not because I don't remember what his hair color is (on his firs appearance it was red) but bc he changes it, he uses wigs.**  
 **2) Someone said Gabriel was too ooc, and yeah maybe he is, but we STILL don't know much about him, and I really believe that he loves Adrien and that they only need to adapt and grow to build a better relationship, and that's what happened, that's why Gabriel acts more like a parent here (and bc i can't stand Adrien to be ignored or feel like he is not loved)**  
 **3) Next chapter may be betaed**  
 **4) I won't abandon this fic, I'm too busy to write as I used to at the beginning of the year, but I'm not leaving this fic unfinished don't ya worry !**

 **And that's it! I'm going on a little travel so I can say when I'm gonna post the next chapter, maybe I get time to write or maybe i don't, can't tell!**

 **Thank you for reading, the kudos and the lovely comments you are so great guys!**  
 **find me on tmblr - buginettte (sometimes i post previews and ramble about the writing process)**


	18. The One With The Plan

When Adrien entered the room he saw his friends already inside.

Alya's arms were crossed against her chest, she was frowning and her lips were pursed. Nino was in front of her, only a foot away, but while Alya was frowning, he wore an amused smile.

Adrien always seemed to find them in that position, nothing on their dynamic had changed after all these years.

"What are you fighting about?" Adrien asked, sharing an amused smile with his best friend.

"Nothing," They said at the unison. Alya turned around and walked in Adrien's direction.

"She is okay, a little dizzy, but she is fine. I promise," He said before Alya was able to ask about Marinette.

"What happened?"

"I don't know. It was strange" Adrien rubbed the back of his head "She had been acting weird, but nothing out of the ordinary, nothing that would swing a flag. Then she spaced out, like that time at lunch, her eyes were dead and she was somewhere else, but Marceline brought her back, asked her if she was okay. Marinette said she was fine and since I had seen this happened before I didn't worry, maybe I should have because not only a minute happened and Marinette screamed—"

"What? Did she say something or—

"She yelled like someone was chasing her or hurting her, she screamed… so loud. Then she dropped to the floor, pulled her hair, mumbled words that I couldn't understand. Marceline told me you talk to her so I started describing our clothes…

"She remembered something," Alya whispered, mostly to herself but the others heard her too "Anything else?"

Adrien nodded vigorously "Her eyes" He swallowed "Her eyes were purple, just like last night but she was still Marinette" Adrien answered, avoiding Alya's sight, too worried about what she could say to him, he focused on his father. It's when he realized that he hadn't informed him about last night events, and he was probably confused "Yesterday we found out that Marinette is Ladybug"

"Miss Césaire already filled me up in the details, Adrien" However Gabriel nodded to him as he had heard it first from him.

Not sure of how to answer Adrien nodded back.

"I don't think I have ever seen her with purple eyes as Marinette, it is always as Ladybug," Alya chewed her lip "I should go and check how she is doing, I think is better if—

Nino took Alya by her arm, pulling her closer to him and stopping her from running away out of the room.

"'Nette has no idea you are her, it's gonna freak her out more if you appear out of nowhere"

Alya pursed her lips. Shaking her arm out of Nino's grip, she crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"I don't like this"

"I know you don't, but right now the best way to help Marinette is talking and sharing what each of us knows so we can come to common ground and figure it out what's wrong with her"

"I hate when you're right," Alya crossed her arms in front of her chest and frowned, her nose puckering in the process, making Nino poked it softly as he chuckled.

"I know, it makes me love being right _even_ more" Alya rolled her eyes exasperated.

"Should we begin with our conversation?" Gabriel interrupted "I got a tight agenda"

"Sure, Mon. Agreste" Nino nodded and changed his position, looking more serious than he did before leaning close to Alya. "Should we resume the essentials first?"

"Please" Alya agreed.

"Okay. So let's start from the very beginning, I'll be quick, stop me if you get lost," Nino cleared his throat "Monsieur Agreste has studied the miraculous because Adrien's mother was holder of the peacock stone, and he has discovered relevant information of the miraculous that had been secret for a while. He has found more strange information across the years because Madam Agreste disappeared and he thinks is tied to the miraculous." The three nodded at Nino, who stopped for a second to get feedback "From my side, we know what Wayzz has taught me—will you like to say it, Wayzz? No? Well, what we know is that Wayzz felt a strange change of energy one night six years ago, energies that involved the butterfly and ladybug miraculous. Since then he hasn't been able to track them and we haven't found an answer to that yet. That change of energy is something that Plagg felt too, he felt Tikki –that's the name of Ladybug's kwami, Alya –disappeared. He didn't give it much thought because they had never been so far apart, but he did worry when Ladybug stopped messaging Adrien, but Adrien was so worried that Plagg decided to not say anything and just wait"

"Which we all know was the worst call," Adrien said, side-eyeing the kwami at his side.

"No time to scold," Nino frowned "Continuing: Adrien was worried but never did a thing about it, neither did I because I was just starting my training so there was not much that I could have done even if I had wanted to do something; and of course Mr. Agreste had no way to know all of this and no reasons to suspect that anything could be wrong with Ladybug. Difference to Alya—" He pointed at his ex-girlfriend "Alya discovered that Marinette was Ladybug, a fact that we all know now, but that I would like Alya to repeat so we can be in the same channel"

Alya nodded and began to talk. She explained every detail she had explained the night before to his friends, being extra-careful to not forget anything in front of Gabriel Agreste.

She explained Marinette's strange behavior and her sudden trip. She told them about the clues she had left behind and how they led her to find her in a strange abandoned place in Tibet. That's when Gabriel stopped her.

"Have I heard you right, Mademoiselle Césaire? Did you just say the Tibet?"

"Yes, I found Marinette there" Alya took her phone, opening the maps app, and looking for a marked location "See? Close to this point"

She passed the phone to Adrien's father, who examined it before giving it to his son.

"Tibet has always been an interesting place to me. I've been studying the stones for a long time and every clue always seems to lead me back to it," Gabriel walked to his desk. Opening a drawer and pulling objects out of it until he took a big

"What's that?" Adrien followed him, trying to peek something as Gabriel flipped through the pages.

"Haven't I taught you to be patient, Adrien?"

"It has to do with my mother and Marinette, sorry if I'm impatient" Adrien huffed.

"As I search for the exact page, it would be wonderful if you could inform me about yesterday's incident with more detail" He did not look up.

"Mari's, right?" Alya asked looking confused.

"Yes. Miss Césaire, you explained that Marinette has turned into Ladybug a few times before. Is that a recurrent phenomenon?

"I don't think so, they shouldn't be more than a dozen times that it has happened," Alya counted with her fingers to make sure she wasn't forgetting any occasion. "And it always happens when she is mad," She remarked. "Or anxious, but in a different way, it's more intense and chaotic than her normal reactions. And she gets aggressive but… not like yesterday—

"We are still not sure she hit that man" Adrien interrupted.

"It was her Adrien. There was akuma energy all over him"

" _Akuma?_ You hadn't mentioned that before" Gabriel lifted his sight to watch them.

"It's only a theory, no, not even that, it's more like a confusing clue in the board," Adrien said between clenched teeth.

"But still is one of the biggest clues we have," Nino put a hand on top of Adrien's shoulder "She certainly showed the characteristics of an akuma last night. Aggressive and ready to fight anyone who crossed her way, distorted mind and she didn't remember anything once she woke up. And her eyes were purple, which I think is our biggest clue"

"Her purple eyes? She had purple eyes just now and she wasn't Ladybug, there's no connection there. I think is just a side effect of whatever it's going on with Mari,"

"Maybe, that's a possibility too" Nino nodded "But we have to keep theorizing until we reach the truth so any little detail is important" Adrien didn't disagree.

"So, do we think Marinette is an akuma or not?" Alya asked.

"To be one, she should have been close to the butterfly miraculous and someone should have had to akumatize her" Gabriel cut her.

"Maybe someone did?"

"Not possible, Miss Alya, I would have felt it. And the corruption I felt is too close in time of the dormant energy" Wayzz joined the conversation, floating close to Alya's curls.

"You guys think Marinette used it," She said winning an approval nod from Nino and the two kwamis. Alya's mouth hung wide open in surprise.

"It makes sense, she has a strange aura around her," Plagg said, mostly to Adrien. The superhero remembered the times Plagg had pointed it out, and all those times he had brushed it off, too enamored by her to see anything wrong.

"Why would she have it? It doesn't make any sense"

"Marinette is a smart young woman, very intuitive and brave," Gabriel said before anyone could answer. He extended his arm and placed the book open in front of them, showing a page filled with a code none of them understood, with weird drawings and swirling lines all around, "I think she figured it out something I've been trying to understand for years"

"We can't read a word of what that says, father," Adrien took the book on his hands "Master Fu taught me a few codes used in a miraculous book but this one doesn't look anything like them."

"These codes are more complex –and older- than the other books Master Fu showed to you. And I wouldn't say they are codes, these books are written in different antique alphabets fused together"

"Like the Japanese language?" Adrien asked, "As if they were written in _katakana_ , _hiragana,_ and _kanji_ , for example?"

"Exactly," Gabriel nodded, an amused and proud smile showing off. "And we have only been able to translate katakana, a few of hiragana and the kanji has been impossible to decode. The grammar and the composition of the sentences is similar to old Chinese, the decoding of the first codes was easier thanks to my knowledge of that language"

"And what does it say?" Alya asked exasperated, which didn't make Mr. Agreste really happy, but he answered anyways.

"It talks about an old powerful source of energy, magical energy," Adrien and Alya looked down to the book as he spoke "it was written for old wise Chinese masters, that I can tell, they name, in numerous opportunities, the elements chart"

"The Chinese chart of elements?" Adrien asked. The forgotten memory of a study session years ago popped up in front of his eyes.

Nino moved closer to the desk and took a lonely piece of paper, big enough to draw the chart on it.

"Oh, I've heard of it a few times" Alya smiled "It has something to do with the miraculous? Your face tells me it might," Alya poked Adrien's nose, making him giggle.

"Yes, it does. Master Fu explained it to Mari and me. Basically, that's how the miraculous work" Nino nodded, supporting the explanation.

"I'm not sure if I'll say that it is how they work," Gabriel said "After years of research I'll say that the Chinese elements are an explanation of the miraculous and how the world kept their balance thanks to them"

"Fancy words for the same thing," Plagg whispered at Adrien's ear. Adrien had to keep his laugh to himself.

Nino, who had just finished a messy but understandable drawing of the chart, placed the paper in the middle of the desk so everyone could get a better look of it.

In blue ink, Nino had done his best effort at representing the chart with every element, how they balanced each other, how they created and conquered one and another. At the side of every element, he had added the name of every miraculous.

Adrien started reading from the top and then in the sense of the clock.

 _ **Fire –Butterfly**_

 _ **Earth-Fox**_

 _ **Metal-Bee**_

 _ **Water-Turtle**_

 _ **Wood-Peacock**_

In the middle of the chart, a messy drawing of the yin-yang had the words _ **ladybug and cat.**_

"Every stone on the set is connected to one of these elements. For example, mine, the turtle, is associated with water" Nino pointed out at the drawing and then to his bracelet "You haven't watched me do anything with water yet, but Alya did"

"Yeah, it was cool" Alya smiled "Like a bender of that TV show you and Alix talked all the time, Adrien. Avatar! I had forgotten the name for a second" She giggled.

"Okay, no Avatar talk" Nino cut "I had had enough of it for three lifetimes"

"Yes, I would also prefer if we focused on what's important," Gabriel looked down over his glasses "I'm certain that Master Fu explained to you how the miraculous preserve their harmony"

"Balance,"He answered "They create each other. For example if we start from here" Adrien took the pen from Nino's hand and draw a circle around the peacock "The element of the peacock is wood, wood creates fire, fire creates earth, earth creates metal and so it goes if you follow the circle" He stopped completing the arrows around the circle, just to draw lines in the middle that crossed over each other " But not only they create and make each other stronger, they can defeat the other in case of corruption" He placed the pen on top of the peacock one more time "Peacock defeats fox, fox suppresses turtle, turtle conquers butterfly, butterfly defeats bee, and then it comes full circle when bee conquers peacock"

"That's amazing," Alya took the drawing on her hands "How old are the miraculous? This theory has been around for god knows how long"

"So have been we," Plagg grinned.

"The chart comes after us, not the other way around" Wayzz pointed out. "If Mr. Agreste says that his book names it, we should've known about this energy"

"But we do not," Plagg said between his teeth.

"Isn't that strange?" Alya looked up to Adrien.

"Completely," Gabriel answered instead "Duusuu –Céline's kwami- had never heard of it either. We realized then that we were dealing with a potent power, I would risk to call it omnipotent"

"Something bigger than the miraculous stones?" Nino asked, sharing a confused look with Wayzz.

Gabriel gave a nod "At first we thought it would be the power of all the box sets together,"

"Another miraculous holder?" Adrien asked, moving closer to his father "Like from another miraculous set of stones? Why was I never informed about that?"

"It wasn't necessary for your mission, Master Fu did well at not telling you, it would have confused you," Gabriel turned to the bookshelf at his right, Adrien followed. "It is in one of the books your mother and I could decode. We spoke about it with Master Fu a few times, too"

"Wayzz says there are three sets of miraculous in different parts of the world. He can't feel them because he can only feel the stones of his own set, but he knows about their existence," Nino added. "You remember where they are, right, buddy?"

"One of them, I'm sure it's safely in South America, close to the pacific shore and the dessert, and the other one is also here in Europe, right, Monsieur Agreste?"

Gabriel nodded at the creature "Yes. We were in need to find more holders, to see if they could help us with the mysteries of the books and their codes. Céline found the owner of the dragonfly miraculous, and they became best friends. She and her husband helped us and became a fundamental part of our investigation" He cleared his throat "You may not remember her, Adrien, but Naomi loved to play with you"

" _Aunt Naomi?!_ " Adrien choked on air "Are everyone around me fucking magical?"

"Language" Gabriel warned him.

"You say that as you weren't magical yourself, I think that line suits _me_ better.

"Aunt Naomi" Adrien gasped and Gabriel nodded, confirming it one more time "What about uncle Willem? He helped but was he like you or—

"Your uncle Willem is the holder of the raven miraculous"

"This is ridiculous," Adrien pulled his bangs "I gotta look into that—

"No! You do not! We gotta look into Marinette first," Alya shouted "We are not going anywhere, we just keep and keep adding information but we are not going anywhere! All this information is marvelous, and believe me I'm incredibly curious but it's not the moment. Please, let's focus on Marinette"

"Miss Césaire, I understand you're worried but nothing I say it's told without a solid background to support it, " He said, "You say you found Marinette in Tibet, if my instincts are right, then Marinette were looking for a powerful energy. I believe they could help us to figure it out what was Marinette looking for"

"Oh, well that makes…sense" Alya hid her face behind a curtain of hair. Nino crossed one arm around her shoulders and brought her closer to him. Alya was not going to break in front of them, he knew that, but she needed someone to comfort her anyways.

"That's useful, you should contact them as soon as possible," Adrien said, "You really believe it exists, father?"

"Absolutely,"

"It isn't impossible and it gives us a solid theory" Nino looked at Adrien "It also makes sense, with an energy so strong and powerful her miraculous alone wouldn't have been enough

"So she needed more power" Adrien completed his sentence.

"But the ladybug and the butterfly are not compatible!" Plagg incorporated himself into the conversation again, letting the piece of decoration, he was playing with, drop to the ground.

"Tikki should know that. She would have never let Marinette use both of them," Wayzz said "It would explain Tikki's disappearance. It makes sense"

"It makes sense, indeed. The butterfly stone is one of the most powerful ones in our set she couldn't use them together but she still needed power, so she probably figured it out something out," Nino rubbed the back of his neck, calling Adrien's attention to his purplish scar.

"Marinette's scar," He said under his breath

"What was that?"

"Marinette has a scar" He explained and touched his chest, on top of his sternum "It's a perfect oval and it's the same color yours has Nino. I saw it the other day but I hadn't connected the dots before, it seemed strange but I didn't go beyond it but it would make sense, right?"

"Did she have that scar before going missing?" Nino looked down at the girl ion his arms.

"No, she had it when I found her, looking exactly like it does today, but it was new I can assure you that," Alya nodded repeatedly "I found it odd too, but not anymore. It's been so long and Marinette always hides it, sometimes I completely forget about it"

"We gotta look more into that" Nino said, writing down a list in the note app on his phone.

"We gotta look more into _everything_ " Alya huffed "This reunion has only made me realize that we know nothing about Marinette's situation. We have half of the facts and horrible incomplete theories"

So she was still mad, understandable.

"I agree, we gotta look for more, but I don't think this reunion was as useless as you make it sound," Adrien said "Now we know what to look for"

"Okay, your parents' friends, I admit that it's a step, but we don't know if it's the right step. We still walking on air" Alya pointed an accusative finger at Adrien.

Adrien didn't answer, and no one else did because there was nothing left to say. Well, Adrien did have something to say, it was an idea that had popped into his head as the conversation rolled but he hadn't been brave enough to bring to the table.

He knew it was a great idea, but it was a crazy idea. He couldn't do it, but it had to be done. He believed it would be an enriching conversation filled with information, and he needed someone who was witty and brave enough to do it.

He needed Alya.

"There's someone we haven't talked to. I believe the information he has will be important to our investigation," Adrien sighed "I need you to do it Alya, but—no, forget it, I can't send you. It was insane" Adrien felt a cold sensation drop through his limbs, he was starting to feel numb.

Alya took a step away from Nino and took Adrien's hand between hers.

Adrien found her sight midway, it was soft and it irradiated trust and confidence.

"Tell me, I'll do it, I bet it is not insane"

"I need you to go talk to Papillon," He said fast, driving over his words but all of them were able to hear him clearly.

" _What?!"_ Adrien and Alya kept quiet while the other's freaked out.

"Adrien" Gabriel squeezed his son's shoulder.

"It's necessary," Adrien sighed "Nino has all the information and Wayzz and Plagg can understand how the bond and powers work, but they don't have the real experience. He has it, he was with Nooroo, he worked with his powers, he is our answer to understand how Marinette could have used it"

"Sadly, and it hurts to say it, my banana head is in the right" Plagg said before anyone else could talk "That abominable bastard will give us the human experience of working with Nooroo. You are gonna have a disgusting job, Miss Ladyblog"

"It's gonna be fun, that bastard will have no idea what hits him, "Alya winked at the kwami.

After the initial shock passed, they started planning out their strategy.

Gabriel, who only had a few minutes left, promised his son to call his old friends and inform him about it as soon as he could do it.

Nino and Wayzz said they were going to study and do more research, that they will go beyond the writings and old scrolls to find any mentions of the mysterious energy.

Alya began to plan the visit, thinking that the smartest option would be to go the first day she could find, to recollect the information as soon as possible. It's true that thousands of people had tried to have a visit to known the infamous Papillon, but each and every single one of them had received a letter where their requests had been denied. Even Alya had gotten one three years ago. But this time she counted with something she hadn't counted before: Chat Noir. Adrien only had to transform and convince the guards and staff of the jail to let Alya in.

The plan was easy but effective.

Still, Alya and Adrien would've liked to stay longer speaking about it, to make a clean strategy and finish the plan, but time wasn't on their side. Not only Gabriel had to go back to work, Nino had been call three times already for a producer that waited for him at the studio and Alya had texts messages of a really worried Charlene.

The three friends left the office together, walking carefully across the halls to not stumble into Marinette.

Once outside, a car was waiting for Nino, leaving Alya and Adrien alone.

"You need a ride?" Adrien asked her.

"Got my motorcycle parked a few blocks down. I'm okay, _blondie_ " Alya began to walk but Adrien didn't follow her. She stopped halfway and looked back to him, asking him what was wrong without speaking.

He walked to her, head down, hands in his pockets. Too nervous to speak loud he whispered her name.

"'Lya"

"What's eating you out?"

He didn't think it twice, he just let it out "I'm gonna tell Marinette that I'm Chat Noir"


	19. The One With The Diary

Marinette had this week beautifully planned.

When she found out Gabriel had selected her to appear in the pages of Vogue, she knew this week was coming and she had put on a strict plan to follow. But, of course, things had turned to be a mess and the week didn't go anything like Marinette expected it.

The last months had been crazy. It seemed like everything that could come back and bite her was taking all its strength and pushing her to the edge, stabbing knives on her back and making her feel like hell had broken loose on her personal little world. The world that had been safe and comfortable, maybe a little bit confusing at times, but safe indeed.

Now chaos was running around her like an old neighbor would.

Marinette's head was spinning around, making her feel dizzy and nauseous. Her heart was pumping at light's speed, making it hard to breathe and stay still.

It would have been one thing, to sew a whole suit that would look impeccable and elegant on Gabriel Agreste's son, but it was another, completely different and more twisted thing, to have to fight with the demons inside her head, that apparently had reunited and come to an agreement to bother her with all their strength this week. Both were stressful situations, but they were not at the same level, not for a second.

Marinette sighed. Looking around her, things outside of her brain weren't going well either and it was mostly her fault.

Marceline and Sébastien tried to play it cool, but she realized that they were keeping an eye on her, giving constant rounds around her workstation, changing turns every twenty minutes. Sébastien had offered numerous times if she needed help fixing the collar of the shirt and Marceline had tried to help her sew the lapel of the jacket, but Marinette had refused every time. It didn't matter how distracted she was or how many times she had had to start again, she didn't want their help because that would mean that something was wrong with her, and she didn't want to admit it to them.

In the time she had known Sébastien and Marceline, they had proven to be great friends.

They had met each other in the personal interviews Gabriel held for the interns' position and they clicked immediately. They had been incredibly lucky and gained a spot in the workshop and now they were inseparable.

Marinette had told them about the accident, the thing she remembered and how hard it had been, and they had been supportive, almost as much as Alya was. It was like she had known them her whole life. Nevertheless, she never confided them the big secrets and right now she was living one, and she was still too scared to tell them the truth.

"Mar—

"I'm fine," Marinette cut Sébastien before he could ask. She sighed at the sad face he made "Okay, I'm not fine, but it's not a big deal, things like this morning happen all the time."

"It doesn't matter if they happen all the time, little lady; it happened today, in front of us and we are worried. Also, you don't' look good, you are pale and look like you're about to puke your guts out"

"I'm on my period," That was not the reason, but it wasn't a lie either so she didn't felt bad keeping that lie alive. "The cramps are killing me,"

"Do you want medicine?" Marceline asked, making her round "I have an analgesic somewhere in my wallet,"

"I'm fine, I think I'll just go home and take a nap," She sighed. How many times in an hour could a human being sigh? "I already finished Adrien's jacket, and I have my dress at home so I can finish it with no problems,"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Marceline, I'm sure," Marinette nodded as she begun to clean her desk.

She threw her things into a bag and cleaned the mess as fast as she could, something she never did. She usually took her time so all of her stuff would stay organized and neat; well, not today.

She put on her coat and left the workroom without saying her usual and warm goodbye to her friends, she just waved at them from the door before disappearing.

Marinette wished she could be able to be teletransport, if only she had that ability, she wouldn't have to stumble into people, but life wasn't easy and luck wasn't on her side today. In the middle of the corridor, from all the people she could run into, it was Nathalie the one who had to appear.

Okay, maybe, just maybe, Nathalie hadn't seen her.

"Mademoiselle Marinette," What a fool of her to think Nathalie wouldn't notice her. How she wished this was old times when she would have passed unnoticed. "Going somewhere?"

"I'm on my way home. I'm feeling a little dizzy and can't focus here," Marinette swallowed, "Is there a problem? Should I stay?"

 _Please say no, please say no, please say no._

"No, you should not," Nathalie shook her head, "M. Agreste would understand, after this morning we all do."

"Well, thank you,"

"I'll call a car for you, wait here," Nathalie pointed out to the closest room.

Marinette, realizing the words she had heard were no part of her imagination –Nathalie was nice, but not that nice- followed her in an attempt to stop her. "That won't be necessary, Nathalie, I'm fine!"

"Mr. Agreste _, the two of them_ , wouldn't be happy if you leave alone after the events of this morning" Marinette felt the blush appear on her cheeks. The mere suggestion of Adrien caring about her made her body electrify.

"Don't tell them then," Marinette said under her breath. Sighing she shook her head and give another look at Nathalie "Really, I take the metro every day, I could do it asleep."

Before Nathalie could oppose once again, Marinette showed her phone "I'll send a text as soon as I get home, would that be good?"

"Alright," Nathalie nodded "How long does it take you to get home?"

"Half an hour if it's not crowded," That was a lie, but Nathalie wouldn't let her go if she knew that it took her around an hour –when it wasn't crowded- to reach home.

"I'll be expecting that text, Miss Dupain Cheng," Marinette nodded in response. Finally being able to leave, she ran the rest of the path she had left.

When she reached the metro station, only three blocks down the street, she didn't go to take the usual metro-line she took every day, she ran to the opposite side of the station and took a different line, but not a strange one.

Because, Marinette didn't want to go her apartment; that was her house and was slowly becoming her home, but it wasn't her home just yet. Her home was the bakery, and that's where her heart was aching to go.

Inside of Marinette's heart, the necessity of finding comfort was growing like a tiny monster, eating out every single good thought that could make her feel calm, only leaving behind anxiety and sadness. The only remedy for that kind of feeling was to go home, _her real home_ , the place where she felt it was the safest one on earth.

The feeling the bakery and her parents brought, had never disappeared, not even when the memories of that placed have been erased from her mind. She always felt at ease at the apartment they shared, and she was expecting to feel the same way today, though she didn't have great expectations.

Instead of leaving her problems at the other side of the door, this time they were going inside with her, and Sabine noticed it immediately. Marinette did nothing more than greet her parents for her to realize something was bothering her daughter.

It was in her eyes, in the way she moved and how she faked a smile at them. She could tell Marinette was happy to see them, but there was a shadow on her face that betrayed her, showing off the real colors of Marinette's emotions.

Lately, Marinette had been acting weird, in a constant state of paranoia. Sabine wondered if it had something to do with Adrien coming back to the city. It would be a logical explication, since both of them were always in strange situations together, even if they didn't know it.

Sabine was a careful mother, who paid attention to her daughter and the world around her, it didn't take her long time to add things up and discover Marinette was the spotter heroine who looked over Paris.

It had been a hard decision to keep the secret, but after numerous and serious conversations, Tom and she decided to let Marinette be the one to reveal herself to them when she was ready and act as she was fooling them. However, they never ignored the situation. Without Marinette knowing they always did things to protect her and make sure she was healthy and happy. They would buy bandages and pain medicine, they would prepare more food so Marinette could sneak out at late nights and still have nutritious food to eat instead of the chips and hard croissants she used to steal before, in between other things that were littler but still helped their daughter.

It wasn't easy to know Marinette was in danger all the time, but it had always been a relief that she wasn't doing it alone. Chat Noir was there.

That kid was a perfect teammate for their Marinette, they would see the two of them in interviews, in patrol or just hanging out, and Sabine knew he was a good kid, but what made her love him more was that he was always protecting her. Chat Noir would always take the shot for Ladybug. That was a relief for Sabine, to know someone was ready to put their life on the line for her daughter. It was selfish, very selfish, but her daughter would always come first. But that didn't mean she didn't care about the teenager who was obviously in love with her daughter, it made her worry more about him, so she kept an eye on him just as she did for Marinette, and that's how, only a few months after discovering Marinette's secret identity, she believed to have discovered Chat Noir's as well.

At first, she wasn't sure, it was only a feeling on her guts, telling her that Adrien Agreste had to be the masked cat, but then it was certain. When Marinette and Adrien grew closer together and her daughter overcame her stuttering and nerves around her crush, they became great friends and an incredible team. Then it was obvious for her, but clearly not for them. Frustrating times, she had to admit it, but she let them be.

Having that piece of information was a burden, a heavy rock against her heart, but there wasn't much that she could do to lift the weight of it. She wanted to tell Marinette before and she wanted to tell her now, but Marinette kept walls and asked for them to be respected. After Adrien's arrival, Sabine wasn't sure if it was the right choice to keep quiet.

Marinette being more paranoid and stressed just when Adrien appeared couldn't be a coincidence. Adrien coming back and asking questions had to mean something, besides his obvious regret of leaving Marinette alone. There was something going on, that was obvious, but exactly what it was, was a mystery.

Sabine had many things to say but she didn't say any of them. She just received her daughter into her house and let her go to her old room. Once again, she decided to leave her alone, to go for her own path.

But that didn't mean she wasn't going to help somehow. She never knew exactly what was happening, but she always did something about it. This time wasn't the exception.

 **xx**

Marinette wasn't sure where to start; she hadn't thought this through. When she was in the metro she felt like she was going to know exactly what to look for first as soon as she stepped into her old room. But that wasn't happening.

Things were exactly as they always were inside of it. Her mom cleaned her room weekly, without moving things of their place and leaving it just like Marinette had left her room six years ago. Marinette knew well that the reason why her mother did that was related to her memory. Sabine hoped that leaving things just like Marinette like them years ago would spark something inside her mind. She had always thought her mother's actions had been useless, in all these years nothing inside the pink room had triggered anything inside her mind.

 _How sad, it still didn't work._

Marinette looked around for long minutes, standing at different corners of her room, trying to change the perspective so something could catch her eye.

 _Nothing worked._

Marinette sighed and jumped to her divan, lying on her stomach. She took one of the pillows and pressed her head against it before screaming.

When she felt like she was suffocating, this time physically and not psychologically, she threw the pillow to the floor and pressed her left cheek against the cushion. Her sight ended up on her desk, looking to a death point of it.

Marinette watches from this perspective every angle of the space in front of her. From the pink of her walls to the clips glued on them, the flag decorations she had around, the different portraits she had on her desk, the space where her old computer screen used to be and now was filled with old folders, the pink chair with wheels, the boxes under the desk—

 _The boxes under the desk._

Boxes she filled up with stuff she didn't want to see, with memories and clues to the past she didn't remember, to the past she said wasn't going to peek through those mountains of memories and past events she decided to keep.

But today…. today she was desperate. And she knew exactly how to stop that desperation.

Between all those boxes, labeled with different names, there was one that promised to give answers: _Diaries._

Marinette used to keep diaries. Notebooks were she would ramble and tell all about her day and talk about her crush. Well, that's what Alya said to her all those times she tried to convince her to read one.

Marinette inhaled deeply.

She wasn't sure if all the answers would be there, maybe she just spoke about mundane stuff like any other teenager did, maybe this was a crazy call of despair that would lead to an empty alley. _But_ , if Alya was right, then there were things about Adrien, and if there were things about Adrien then a few answers would be there too. Adrien had triggered more sensations and confusing thoughts than anyone she knew, even before remembering him, he was a constant dizzy sensation in Marinette's body.

If Adrien provoked questions, then knowing more about him would give her a few answers. It was only logical.

It was decided, she was going to read the diaries.

She didn't stand, it was more like she let her body fall to the ground in the most delicate way she managed and then started crawling to where the box was. Breaking her promise did not feel good. She knew it was the only solution but she still felt like she was betraying herself. Stupid, she knew that, but what could she do?

She roomed through the boxes until she saw the one with the diaries, that of course, had been one of the last boxes on the pile, in the shadiest corner of it. There were five, but she only took the one with the years she needed. Thank god, she had written them down on the outside because if not then she would have had to look through her 10-year-old diaries, and those would have nothing but useless information and, probably, embarrassing thoughts.

She took the journals out and displayed them in front of her, organizing them by year. She used two journals a year, except her last year of school: she used three. Looking at the journals in front of her she realized that they would contain more information that the one she needed or details that wouldn't provide any answers and, of course, stories that would probably make more questions appear inside her mind.

She had to choose well. She had to choose a date that would be useful and that would explain things with just a few sentences, she didn't have the patience to go through every single diary in front of her. She wanted quick answers, _she had to choose well_.

Okay, but to choose well, she had to know what answers she wanted to reveal first.

For years, thousand of questions had been running around inside her mind. Like a roller coaster, making constants loops, producing adrenaline and fear, showinf off with physical sensations. There were many questions she could answer, answers that had been there for years but right now, right now, what was the things she was most curious about? No, not that. What was the thing that would give more answers?.

 _Ladybug._

The mystery of Ladybug, and her relation with it, was the biggest concern and the one she had had for the longest time, it was only logical to go for it first.

But, it was a strong subject, she couldn't just pick any date, she needed a good date, one that could confirm that her doubts were rightly based and at the same time something that wouldn't freak her out, nothing too strong, but nothing too vague.

Choosing when all it started would have been too confusing, and in the middle maybe wasn't a good idea either; she may stumble with some information that wasn't necessary for her research.

 _When was all over?_

It was a little risky but maybe it was the fastest way to figure it out. Yeah, when it was over was nice.

She chose a month later of the fall of Papillon a Parisian holiday easy to remember, and if she had anything to do with it, she was sure she had written something about it. That day would confirm if she was or not Ladybug, but wouldn't include any fights since Papillon would've been defeated. Yeah, that date was right.

She flipped through the pages until she found the selected date. The sight of her own calligraphy made her feel a little bit calm but it wasn't enough to stop the tremble on her hands. Marinette took a big breath and started reading before she could regret her decision.

 _ **Dear Diary:**_

 _ **Things are better.**_

 _ **Better is still not good but,**_ **** _it is something_ ** _._** **** **It is** **** _ **a step closer to good, and a step closer means that one day they would be excellent even normal. So, I'm thankful for that little**_ **** **better.**

 _ **It's still hard to speak about it, it's even harder to pretend that I wasn't involved in it, that I wasn't one of the main factors of it. Everyone lives in their own world now, some more than others, that makes me feel like I can't talk to anyone anymore, not even Tikki—**_

Marinette stopped.

That name… It was new and foreign but the longest she stared at it, the echoes on the back of her mind became louder. She couldn't understand what they were saying, only that they were loud.

She touched the page with her fingertips and touched the word. It was there, she had written it, and the feelings inside her body were almost never wrong. She was supposed to know what it meant and who that person was but... she did not.

 _Tikki…_ It sounded weird, not like a real name, more like something you would call an imaginary friend.

She kept reading.

 _ **—**_ _ **I wish that I could tell everything to Alya. That's what I always wanted, after defeating Papillon I planned to tell her but our world is hell on Earth right now, and it is impossible for me to talk about it without bringing more pain into it. I don't want to put more weight on Alya's shoulders; she already has enough to worry about with Nino. I don't want to imagine how she will react when I tell her that I'm Ladybug—**_

At the last sentence, Marinette's heart turned into a ticking bomb, it couldn't be a human living heart anymore because it didn't seem to move, but oh boy, did it have an annoying beating sound, and just like a bomb, she felt like it was going to explode in only seconds.

This was what she was looking for, this was what she had always had doubt. And while she did felt confusion and uncomfortable sensations all over her body, it didn't feel surprising. That was what made the situation unbearable.

It was like she had always known but didn't want to accept it. After all, she could spend days just looking at old videos of the akuma fights, reading articles and smiling at comments of fans who were still spreading their love all over the internet.

Marinette was shaking but not of surprise, the feeling was deeper and darker than that.

"Keep reading Marinette, keep reading…" She whispered softly, trying to calm herself down "You're Ladybug, it's no big deal, you're just a heroine that used to run over the roofs of Paris… you do the same now, it is no big deal"

It was a big deal, but Marinette was too headstrong to say it out loud.

"Keep reading Marinette." She said one more time. Once she felt ready, she started reading from where she had left it.

 _ **—**_ _ **it would be chaotic! I can't imagine all the questions she would ask, and if she knows I'm Ladybug she would ask me who Chat Noir is! And I haven't used to know his identity just yet, it's been just a month but—**_

Marinette screamed.

She read the fragment again two times, then another one just to confirm what she had already seen. When the words written down didn't change, no matter how much she wished, she screamed again, louder and more desperate this time, and then she threw the diary as far as she could. The diary smashed against her wall and fell to the ground, letting papers spread all over the floor.

That was the last straw. That was the last piece of shocking information she could read today.

 _Oh my god, she knew who Chat Noir was!_

Oh god, did that mean he also knew she was Ladybug? That would make so much sense! It would explain why they had clicked together so fast, why he wanted to spend so much time with her, why they fought so well together and why he sometimes called her by the nickname he gave Ladybug.

God damn, _she was Ladybug._ It was not only a big deal, it was a gigantic, the size of the Eiffel Tower kind of deal!

This was too much to handle in a day. She was hoping to get information but she didn't imagine she would find that many revealing facts in the course of a page! This wasn't how it was supposed to go!

"Marinette are you okay?" Her mother appeared through the trapdoor. Her eyes shined with worry. "I heard you scream, what is wrong, sweetie?"

Marinette ignored her. Not onpropose, but her mind was too far away to concentrate in the real world. The pieces of information she had recollected in this short minutes were passing through her mind like the headlines of a newspaper.

These things weren't theories anymore, they had turned into facts, and Marinette was trying to put them together with old parts of her memories.

First, her being Ladybug, was connected to her accident; finally giving a logical explanation to it.

Second, there was the reason why Chat Noir and she got along so well… Wait a minute.

If she had known his secret identity, then of course Chat Noir had discovered hers! He had been pretending not to know but he had to know! And if he hadn't known back then, there was no way that he didn't know about it know. It was only obvious for him to assume she was his old partner. Marinette had shared lots of details with him, and Chat Noir was smart, he could have put two and two together, with the time they spent together it was impossible for him not to notice.

Now that she thought about it, anyone close enough to her could put the pieces of the puzzle together….

"Alya," Marinette whispered.

Alya was the closest friend she had and she was the old owner of the Ladyblog! _The Ladyblog!_ A blog completely dedicated to her superhero persona.

And Alya had found her… and she never explained...

 **What if Alya had known all this time?** What if she had kept it a secret? Was that even possible? Yes, it was very possible! There was no way Alya didn't know!

Alya was a journalist with a vivid and critical eye, she was better than detectives at times. Well, she didn't know that she was sneaking out with Chat Noir these months… or did she?

"Oh my god, what if Alya has been lying to me this whole time?" The thought was disgusting. It felt like acid was running to her throat, it felt like, pure liquid betrayal.

"Marinette, sweetie you're scaring me," Marinette felt the hand of her mother on her shoulder.

She was standing by her side in the middle of her room. Marinette realized, in her mother's eyes this was a horrible scene. Tears were streaming down her face, her hands were pulling the hair on her scalp, and her whole body was trembling as it had a mind of its own.

"I just…" Marinette couldn't come out with an excuse, the thought on her head were making everything blurry and confusing, yet she couldn't escape from them because she wanted to see them.

Marinette looked at her mother and a thought struck her mind. If Alya knew –and she was sure that she did- there was no way she kept the secret from her parents, what meant…

"Oh my god," Marinette took a step away from Sabine.

"Marinette,"

"This is not happening, this is not happening,"

Sabine tried to take Marinette from her shoulders and make her sit down, but in an abrupt and aggressive movement, that did not seem intentional, Marinette shoved her mother aside and left the room, running out of the house.

Running, running, running… but this time it wasn't to leave the problems behind but to confront them. And there was only one person she knew she could attend to. There was only one person that she knew was going to tell her the whole truth because he had already tried before.

 **xx**


	20. The One With The Scientist

Alya paced back and forth around her office.

She was one of those people who thought better when she was moving. Things always seemed to sort out when she was taking a walk, riding a bike or doing a workout at the gym, that's why when she wasn't able to do that kind of things because they were required to do outdoors, she relayed on walking in circles around a room.

Today that wasn't working.

Not only she had a thousand things to worry about with the next editorial number of the new magazine they were coming out with, but she also had personal problems and the Marinette problem, which wasn't doing anything but turning more and more complicated every day. And now, she had to add the Adrien problem to her list.

The crazy boy wanted to reveal his identity! He hadn't learned anything by hanging out with Marinette every night.

Alya was grateful that he had asked her first, if not who knows the mess he could have created by letting the reveal jump out of his mouth.

Wanting to leave those thoughts behind for only a couple of minutes so she wouldn't stress over at work, she went over the papers Charlene had left on her desk that morning.

It was a well-written article she had written about a new construction close to the _Centre Pompidou_ and how it would affect in the infrastructure of the city _._ It was really well written –nothing surprising coming from Charlene- but there were a few technical errors she would have to change.

"Charlene?" Alya asked, rose a brow and looking around the office for the girl, but she was nowhere to be found.

Why wasn't she there?

Alya hadn't been walking around in circles around ten minutes, that wasn't more than the usual time, but this time the girl had disappeared. Where was she and when had she left the office?

She ignored her a few times during the work time, Charlene tested out her patience most of the time. She loved the girl, she really did, she had the potential to become a great journalist, but sometimes she was just annoying.

Nonetheless, she needed the girl, so she went out of the office to look for the girl.

To her luck, it wasn't hard to find her; Charlene was practically shaking in the middle of the hallway as she spoke with one of the other interns in the department.

"Charlene," Alya called approaching to her. She smiled at the guy who made a reverence at seeing her. If she wasn't mad at Charlene she would have laughed at the guy.

"M. Lahiffe is here," Oh, so that's why she was a wreck of nerves. "Luca texted, he knows I'm a fan… I was going to go tell you"

"Where's he?" Alya crooked a brow. _Why was he here, but not at her office?_

"I ran into him on my way here, he asked for you but before I could answer we ran into Liam, he had finished his interview and was guiding with his guest to the reception, but M. Lahiffe stopped and started talking to them,"

"Uh?" Liam was known for his good interviews, he always had someone from the medical area walking around the floor. Lately, he had been praising himself, saying that he had gotten an interview with an expert in mother-cell experiments. That was cool, but not of Alya's interest so she hadn't paid much attention.

And there was no way it was of Nino's attention.

He hated biology! Alya had to drag him and practically tie him to a chair every time they had a project or an upcoming exam so he could do what he had to. So, why would he be interested in one of Liam's interview guests?

"He is the coffee room," Charlene pointed in the direction of the room.

"Let me know if someone calls," Alya ran down the hallway to find the room

The coffee room was a little area at the end of the hallway with big windows that made it look wider than it was. It counted with two bending machines and three coffee machines, and it was Alya's least favorite place in the building so she never went there, but today she was making an exception.

The door was open when she got there, so she went inside half-running. Nino was in front of her, sitting in one of the plastic chairs and smiling at the girl sitting in front of him.

She was sitting but Alya could tell the girl was tall and super skinny. Her hair was in a long ponytail, falling like a dark cascade on top of her shoulders. She was wearing a military green shirt and black skinny jeans. She hadn't seen her face but Alya knew she was stunning and that was making her blood boil. Nino and she hadn't spoken much about their relationship but she was beginning to consider Nino hers again, and her jealousy was taking over her.

"Lya!" Nino noticed her and waved, giving one of those tooth-paste-commercial-smiles.

Alya crossed her arms in front of her chest. She hated to be jealous but after all those fake girlfriends Nino had had, she couldn't control it.

She was about to speak when the girl turned around, and all the anger inside of Alya evaporated, making her smile from ear to ear.

"Juleka!" Alya shouted happily.

"Hi, Alya," The girl gave a crooked smile to her old friend. She looked just the same and completely different all at the same time.

She was still super skinny, tall and pale. She didn't have her hair in front of her face as she used to when she was a teen, and you could appreciate her beautiful and odd eyes like that, and the deep black eyeliner made them pop even more. She looks more amicable than she had ever looked and more confident, but there was still that shadow over her that made Juleka, _well, Juleka_.

"I feel like I haven't seen you in forever," Alya said excited "What are you doing here?"

"I had an interview," Right, Charlene had said that. "Then I met Nino in the hallway and we started catching up"

"Yeah and talking about zombies!" Nino laughed.

"Of course, zombies too, zombies are awesome"

"Okay?" Alya sat in the chair next to Juleka "So how long are you staying in Paris?"

"I'm going back to Berlin Sunday night, I just had a seminary and your college has been calling me for months now so I decide to give him the interview,"

"Ugh Liam is tiresome isn't he?" Alya rolled her eyes. That made Nino smile. "You're staying for so little, have known before I would invite you to dinner or something, but my nights are full"

"It's okay, this is fine" Juleka went quiet for a minute. The look on her face was strange, what made Nino and Alya share a worried glance. "To be honest, I came here to talk to you, Alya"

"Me?" Alya crooked a brow.

"Yes. I've wanted to call you for a while," Juleka said, after giving a sip to her coffee "But I couldn't do it, not just yet,"

"Should I leave you two alone?" Nino asked, feeling the weight of the situation starting to appear in the room.

"No, I think you'll be interested in it too" Juleka sighed "It's about Marinette"

Of course, it was about Marinette, everything always happened to be about Marinette. But what could Juleka know that was so important to put that look on her face?

Juleka and Rose had visited Marinette a few times when she was in the hospital and thought they weren't as close as they used to be when they were in high school, Alya knew Marinette and Juleka spoke over the phone a few times a year.

"About Marinette?"

"About her accident," Juleka opened her purse and pulled out her phone. "Marinette's case is not normal, you know that you saw all the doctors and investigators around her. You don't know that I was one of them, I mean if you had known you would have called already" Nino laughed at that.

"You were in Marinette's case?" Alya ignored the joke, her pride wasn't important in this moment.

"Her parents gave permission to an investigation I was part of. It was a dead end, just like the other investigations, none of our experiments answered the many questions Marinette's case had."

"How many people tried to make an investigation out of Marinette?" Nino asked concerned.

"Too many," Alya rubbed her temples "It was a company after another, even after Marinette woke up, scientist and doctors still knocked at her door. Marinette's coma didn't enter in any medical category, her vital signs were over the roof but she wasn't dead, her reactions weren't the ones a coma patient had. She was an interesting subject"

"She was indeed" Juleka nodded "But after Marinette woke up there was no much to study, and people were frustrated by the lack of answers they found in the multiple studies they made. It's understandable, I mean, I'm not a doctor and Marinette is the oddest case I've ever stumbled on, I was attracted to it too. But after a year or so it stopped being relevant and we all forgot about it, well, until a few months ago."

"Someone started studying Marinette's case again?!" Alya screamed, making Nino cover her mouth with his hand.

"Yes, not really," Juleka opened an archive on her phone and showed it to Alya "This are images of tissue"

Alya saw the picture, circles and weird forms in purples and pinks. She knew it was a picture from a microscope but that was about it.

"Okay, to be honest, I have no idea at what I'm looking at,"

"It's a piece of Marinette's skin, I took it out of her chest were she had that weird looking purple scar," The scientist explained "Back then it looked weird to me so I took a sample but it was never part of the study so I never made a deep study of it.

Last year I started studying how radiation makes the cells mute, it's not a unique study but it is an interesting one. I had a good study in mother-cells so I thought that I could relate them. I went through my files and found Marinette's; out of curiosity I opened, and this time I saw something strange. When Marinette's skin and blood sample first came I did not find anything that would suggest her having any particular or special thing- but I think that's because I didn't have the expertise that I have today- but now I saw something different from anything I've ever seen before"

"What?!" Alya took Juleka by her shoulders and leaned into her

"Let her talk, 'Lya" Nino shook his head.

"I'm sorry, I'm nervous,"

"It's okay," Juleka nodded and did not waste more time "Look at this part of the sample," Juleka pointed a part of the picture, mostly pink in the picture "This is Marinette's tissue, it's normal conjunctive tissue, but, this part" Juleka pointed at small purplish section of the picture, it was almost invisible to Alya's eyes but focusing she could see it "These are not Marinette's cells"

"What?!" Nino screamed this time.

"What it is?" Alya said almost immediately.

"They're cells but they are not human or vegetal cells. These cells are different, and I'm calling them cells because they enter in some criteria but they could not be" Juleka changed the picture, another sample "This is a sample of Marinette's shoulder and it's normal, so there's something about that scar that it's unique. If it had been any other person I would think I was crazy or that I made a mistake, but it's freaking Ladybug that we are talking about,"

"You know?!" Nino and Alya shouted at the unison.

"She wasn't exactly, uh… subtle," Juleka laughed.

No, she was not but Alya wasn't going to let Juleka known.

"Well, yeah," Alya fake giggled "So you studied this having that in mind?"

"Yes, if I didn't, nothing would make any sense. It still doesn't make much but I'm one step closer to the truth if I have that fact in mind, right?" The friends nodded, "Marinette gained physical strength, elasticity, and other abilities when she became Ladybug. I don't know how she did it but I believe it interfered with her cells or, something went inside her cells, I've been calling it a gnome"

Was Juleka saying what Alya thought she was saying? How had she figured it out that there was a tiny little fairy giving Marinette powers? How of all the conclusions could she come with she had ended up choosing the right one? How did she know so much? This was scary. Juleka was smart, almost a genius but this wasn't biology or math, this was an unknown science if you could call magic that.

"What do you mean with a "gnome"?" Nino's tone of voice was skeptical but mostly because it was hiding all the fear he was holding inside. Juleka didn't notice, but Alya knew him too well and did notice.

"She must have transformed into Ladybug with some sort of magic, right? And since I found different cells on her body I'm assuming it was a living creature, that's what I mean, you can call it fairy if you want but I thought gnome was cooler"

"And you came to this conclusion just with the cells you found?" Alya asked.

"Yeah," She nodded but stopped abruptly "Well, I also looked information of the place you found Marinette. I had a variety of articles related to old traditions and beliefs on my living room, one of them called Rose's attention so she called Kim who was doing a part of his show close to the location, and he provided information that made me come to that conclusion" Juleka giggled, the ex-couple face expressions were just hilarious "By the look on your faces I assume I'm right,"

"Sort of," Nino cleared his throat "So, Juleka -I'm sorry for asking again but I need to get this clear- you're saying that Marinette has remaining cells of a strange being in her skin?"

"Yes," She nodded.

"So that means she was in contact with this strange fairy?" Alya stood by Nino, crossed her arms in front of her chest and narrowed her eyes "You're saying the scar she has is the creature's fault?"

"Yes and yes. But I think it goes beyond it," Juleka also stood up "The x-rays the doctors took of Marinette had strange spots around the scar's area, they couldn't make a biopsy of the tissue because the needles kept breaking in a half –I was lucky to get a piece of her skin to analyze, still don't know how I did it- and her vital signs, specifically make me believe that this weird gnome is in fact fused with Marinette"

Something clicked inside Alya's head.

If Marinette had the creature that gave her power inside of her, her transformations into Ladybug would make sense!

"Juleka I love you so much!" Alya threw herself at the girl and wrapped her in a big hug.

Juleka went stiff but didn't push back Alya, she didn't give the hug back either, but Alya didn't take it in a bad way. Juleka was so much sociable that she had been years ago, but she was still Juleka.

"Same here, Jules, " Nino said, patting the girl's shoulder "You have no idea how much you have helped us,"

"It was nothing," Juleka gently pushed Alya, the hug was taking forever to end. "I assume you two are going to fly out, as you always did" Nino laughed "You have to let me know if I was rig because this is only a theory.

"We will" Alya winked.

Nino and Alya said goodbye to Juleka with the biggest smiles on their faces, a pair of smiles they didn't think they would be wearing today. The meeting with the Agrestes had been informative but also disappointing, it had felt like they were inside a labyrinth and that every new exit they found, throw them to a new and more complicated stage of the maze. But now they had a new theory and one that had a solid base, one that they could start to study immediately.

And that's exactly what they did.

Leaving behind their work compromises, the couple went to Adrien's apartment, where the board still hanged in the living room and started working immediately.

Alya updated the board, tied some loose ends with the information she had and started her own notebook with questions and answers.

Nino drowned himself in books while Wayzz guided him through the pages, trying to find an explanation to Juleka's words.

It wasn't easy, they knew that, but for the first time in a long time, it felt like the sun was shining above them.

xx

Marinette washed her face with the cold water streaming down the shower head. She had been in the bathtub for hours now, so there was no more hot water left, but that didn't seem to bother her, she had to get used to the water temperature already.

After an intense crying season, a bath was always good, it helped you relax and wash away all the problems. Marinette was scared of leaving the bathtub and have all those problems coming back to her and had stayed immobile, hugging her legs and her head on top of her knees the whole time. And she would have stayed like that longer if it hadn't been for the knocks on the door.

"Come in," Marinette fixed her sight on the door and watched it open slowly until a tall skinny man with red locks was in front of her.

"You're gonna catch a cold, Mari, thought," He said sitting on the bathroom floor, close to the bathtub.

"I don't catch colds, you know that" She smiled softly at him "Is that cup of coffee for me?"

"I don't drink coffee, you know that" He answered, passing the cup to her.

"Thank you," Marinette pressed the cup against her cheek, feeling the warm sensation on her skin. "I'm not sure if I'm ready to talk yet,"

"Are you ever going to be?"

"I don't think so," She sighed. "You know why I'm here, don't you?"

"Not really, 'Nette. I didn't expect to see you in a long, long time, and now you're here at my bath, tough thinking it well, you love that bathtub" Marinette giggled. That was true. "But if I had to guess I'll say that you remembered something and want some sort of explanation"

"Is not that I remembered it," Marinette begun, if she didn't jump fast she was never going to get into the subject. "My head has been a mess lately, different emotions have surfaced and I get blurry flashbacks, that make me dizzy… my mind is spinning around all the time and seems like it doesn't want to stop anytime soon, so I thought that maybe it was time to look for answers"

"For the tone of your voice and the gallons of tears of three hours ago, I assume it was a bad idea," Nathanael extended his arm to be able to touch Marinette's hair. She didn't say anything, she let him play with the wet pieces of her hair, it was relaxing and familiar and Marinette needed that calm to continue.

"I read one of my diaries," She stuttered at the end. Taking a big gasp of air she continued "I find answers to question I had been asking myself for a very long time, but…. I don't feel relieved"

"Because you can't find a tie to connect you with the words you read," Nathanael said; his voice as soft as his caresses. "You read words that shock you but if they don't spar anything they just turn to be more weight on your shoulders. I thought that was the reason why you never read them"

"I didn't read them because I was scared of what I could find," Marinette admitted the truth to someone else for the first time. "I think a deep part of me knows everything and it's too damaged and scared to let the truth come out, I think that part of me is screaming warnings and making me avoid the truth"

"And you've been listening"

"Exactly"

"Then why did you stop listening?"

The answer was clear: Adrien, but she couldn't tell him that.

"I don't know, Nath. I was tired of being in the dark" Marinette drink a sip of her coffee "It has cinnamon on it!"

"Yeah, from the cream mix you buy, I still have a bit of it, I've discovered that it tastes delicious when you mix it with cocoa. I was out of tea the other day and find the box of the cream mix in my kitchen shelves so I had to improvise" He smiled, and Marinette did too. "Want one? I can teach you my special recipe".

The situation could have been awkward, the breakup had been so Marinette didn't expect for Nathanael to let her in so easily, but he did.

When Marinette knocked at his door he opened and welcomed her with a smile, he wasn't the same as always but he didn't act mean towards her and Marinette was thankful for that because she wasn't able to hold the tears for long.

She started crying in the middle of the living room and Nathanael wrapped her in a big warm hug. She didn't say a word and neither did he, but it calmed Marinette down, he had that effect on her and she had finally figured it out why.

Nathanael didn't spark any strong memories. Nathanael was safe.

She loved him very much but lately, she had been thinking that her love might not be as genuine as she thought it was and Nathanael didn't deserve that. She had stuttered on her way here, stopping in the middle of the street a few times until she convinced herself that this was the best place to be at. Also, she still wanted to keep him as a friend, he was important and she cared about him.

She loved him for the memories they had created together, for his personality, for those little quirky habits and for what he was doing now, his amazing ability to change subjects and distract her when she was showing signs of breaking down.

"Can you prepare me one as I dress up?" Marinette asked.

Nathanael nodded. He stood up and opened one of the doors under his sink, taking one towel and handing it to Marinette before leaving the bathroom.

Marinette did the whole process of getting out of the tub as fast as she could, if she didn't dress immediately she was going to stay in the water forever.

She untied her hair from the bun she had made to avoid getting it wet and took Nath's brush to untie the knots. She opened the cabinet and was happy to find that Nath hadn't throw away her little bag with makeup. She didn't do much, she just covered her under eyes circles with concealer and curled her lashes to look more awake than she did right now, that always made her feel better.

Looking her reflection in the mirror, she realized that the little trick hadn't been enough. Nothing was going to be enough, was it?

She had come to Nathanael because she knew she was going to be able to calm down with him around, it was always like that. Also, if she asked difficult questions he was going to answer straight up with the truth. She wasn't sure how much Nathanael knew but he had to know something and that was going to be the best place to start. If she went to Chat Noir right now she wasn't sure she could be able to handle it.

Oh, Chat.

He held all the answers, Marinette was sure of that, but she wasn't feeling in the mood to see him. For what she had read, she had known Chat Noir's secret identity before losing her memory. In the way she wrote it, he didn't seem to know that she knew, but the various conversations they have had where Chat offered to take the mask and show her who he was made her doubt.

And if she had figured it out, then Chat probably had figured it out her identity too –well, if she wasn't lying in her diary- and if he knew who she was that meant he had been lying this whole time, and Marinette didn't know how to feel about that.

Chat Noir was someone with who she needed to speak, but she was going to take slow and little steps before getting to him. And for getting there she had to take the first step, and she was going to do it now.

Marinette rampaged out of the bathroom and into the kitchen, finding Nathanael stirring a spoon into a mug.

"Mar—

"I'm I Ladybug?" No time to hesitate, she asked at the moment she put a foot in the kitchen.

Nathanael sighed and rubbed his temples with his fingertips.

"Let's sit down, okay? I feel like this is going to take a long time"


	21. The One With The Party (pt1)

Adrien stirred his coffee a few times more than necessary, trying to make an irritant sound with the constant crash of the spoon against the mug.

Alya and Nino were sleeping on his apartment floor. It wasn't unusual for Nino to end up sleeping on the floor since he refused to take Adrien's offers to buy another bed or go to a hotel where he would be more comfortable; the unusual thing was Alya, which meant that something had happened.

He kept making noise while he moved around the kitchen, hoping it would make his friends wake up, he had already tried to do it on his own and it hadn't worked, so he hoped that being annoying would work.

And it did. Twenty minutes of annoying noises and Nino's head popped up above the couch.

"When did you arrive?" He asked in the middle of a yawn. "We didn't hear you come home"

"From work around ten o'clock, then went for a patrol and came back before midnight, you were both already sleeping. I tried to wake you up but I almost got hit so I desisted."

"Ugh," Alya said, alerting Adrien that she was awake too. Rubbing the back of her neck she walked to Adrien's side. "What time is it now?"

"Past ten," Adrien gave his mug to Alya. He had not prepared it for her but she was going to steal it anyway.

"Damn, I thought I had more time," She sighed.

"More time for what?" Nino took the cup out of Alya's hands and drank a sip of the coffee.

"I'm going to help Marinette take her stuff to the studio, today is the party and it's a big deal, you know? I have to be there for moral support too." Alya explained, "Was she nervous?"

"Are you asking me?" Adrien crooked a brow.

"Yeah? Who else has rooftops rendezvous with her at night?"

"I did not see Mari last night. She wasn't waiting for me at the rooftop and she wasn't home either,"

"Marinette wasn't home? That's strange. Did you check the bakery?"

"Yes, she wasn't there either. She was probably at Nath's"

"I don't think so,"

"Why not?" Nino asked with his mouth full, what made him win a soft slap on his shoulder, courtesy of Alya.

"Ugh, just stuff…" She made a face that let know that it wasn't just as light as she made it seem. "It doesn't matter right now, okay? We got more important things to talk about"

"Don't we always?" Adrien looked at Nino with a funny face.

"It's about Mari," That didn't surprise Adrien, "Juleka gave us valuable information"

"Juleka? When did you guys talk to Juleka?" _That_ did. His curiosity sparked like a firecracker, "How does she fit here?"

"She was at Alya's headquarters," Nino said.

"She was in one of the companies that studied Marinette's case and difference to all of them, she did find something. No surprise, Juleka has always been super smart—

"And intuitive, don't forget that" Nino added.

"Okay, we all know Juleka is great, we've always known, but can we skip what I already know and get to what I don't know. No time for suspense, guys"

"You're right," Nino nodded. He ran to the living room and came back with a book on his hands.

It wasn't the kind of book Adrien expected him to bring. Nino usually carried old books, with bent spines, golden decorations, and three times in size to the one he gave him, and they were never written in French, but this one was.

"Why are you giving me a book about cytology?"

"Because I want you to watch this picture," He pointed out at the first circle at the left, "This is how a normal epidermis tissue looks like,"

"Alright," Adrien looked at him confused.

"Now look at this," Alya said, putting her phone in front of his eyes and showing another picture of a cell sample.

They didn't have to explain, Adrien realized the differences immediately.

"That's not human tissue," He stated and took the phone out of Alya's hands. "I don't think it's from an animal or a plant either,"

"How do you know that?!" Alya and Nino shouted at the unison.

"I needed to take extra courses, and the cytology course was the only one I had time for in the second semester, so I took it" He sighed, "I still don't understand what this is about. Why are we looking at skin cells?"

"Because this picture is from a piece of chest skin Juleka took from Marinette's scar," Alya explained.

"She took it from her scar? The one we were talking about yesterday?" He asked skeptically. To get an explanation out of nowhere after months of searching was just too good to be true.

"Yes!" Alya shouted with joy.

"So, let me explain to see if I'm right. Juleka took a sample of Marinette's scar skin. After years she decided to give it another look and found a different kind of cell mixed with hers?" Alya nodded "So that means…Mari has something inside her?"

"Not just something! Show him, Nino!" Alya took Adrien by his hand and ran to the living room, where all the books were open. Nino followed, taking one of the oldest books on the table, opening and flipping the pages until he found what he was searching for.

Adrien couldn't recognize the language used in the book, but the pictures helped him a little. He had seen those kinds of shapes and swirls when training with Marinette and Master Fu years ago, one of those was the _miraculous and kwamis_ symbols.

"I recognize the miraculous and the kwami symbols, but the rest… you'll have to translate this for me, bro,"

"It explains how the kwamis and the miraculous are not two separated entities but two parts of a whole," Nino explained. "Wayzz!"

Adrien looked around to find the green kwami, he usually was glued to Nino, more than Plagg was to him, so it was strange that he hadn't spoken already.

"Wayzz!" Nino shouted again, this time worried.

"Plagg?" Adrien called for his kwami too. "Plagg?!"

"We're here, we're! We heard you the first time, you hysterical guys" Plagg screamed, just after passing through the closed door.

"We are sorry, we thought you were still sleeping," Wayzz said more warmly than his friend.

"Where were you?" Nino asked.

"Next door," Wayzz answered as he sat on Nino's shoulder.

"What?" Nino and Adrien asked at the unison, more confused than mad.

"We decided it was time to analyze your princess's apartment," Plagg said to Adrien and pulled one of his locks before flying to his cabinet, looking for cheese sticks.

"I'm there all the time. Couldn't you have done it before? Marinette could have seen you!" Adrien shouted.

"One, you know as well as I do that I can't use that kind of magic when you're transformed. Two, calm down, she wasn't home, we—well Wayzz would have never let me go if she had been there. Three, we ran out of cheesy crackers we have to buy more,"

Adrien rolled his eyes. He was ready to nag Plagg when Nino began to speak, with his usual warm and calmed voice, as what the kwamis had done wasn't serious at all.

"So?" Adrien looked at his little friend.

"Nothing," Wayzz answered instead, shaking his head with disappointment "I felt magic all around the apartment, it isn't strong and it's mixed with Adrien's traces of magic too,"

"Oh yeah, that apartment reeks of Adrien," Plagg peeked his guardian's cheek playfully.

"Besides that, anything that could help us?" Nino asked, trying to hide his amused smile.

"Sadly, nothing useful was found," Wayzz shook his head. "We will have to stick to books and wait for more clues to surface,"

"Mmm..." Adrien and Nino looked at Alya.

"What's on your mind, Lya?" Nino asked, flipping pages of the book trying to see if something on them sparked a theory inside his mind.

"Just... maybe… I… ugh," Alya shook her head, "Yesterday I lashed out on Adrien when he told me he wanted to reveal his identity to Marinette."

 _Lashed out?_ That was a subtle description of her reaction. Alya had screamed so loud that all the pigeons around had gone flying. Adrien was still thanking the Divine's forces for keeping him safe of Alya's deathly stares. She had almost punched him in the face –on accident, but it had happened! -.

Adrien was ready to talk and ask what had made her mind give a one hundred eighty flip but Alya's expression made him remain silent.

"Things are only getting more complicated and Marinette might know more than I give her credit," She sighed, "I'm not saying that we should go and knock on her door right at this moment, but if you have the chance, you should tell her,"

Nino and Adrien stared at each other before nodding at their friend. She didn't sound happy with the statement but she was right. Marinette was the missing piece and she wasn't missing at all, if they wanted to figure this out and help her, she had to know.

"I will," Adrien promised "First chance I get I'll tell her who I am,"

"You have to be careful, don't tell her immediately because I will be too much,"

"Of course," Adrien nodded and the silence took over the room.

Revealing Marinette's past was a big step for Alya. She had been protecting her from those memories for years, she had been trying to keep Marinette away of the dangers that had almost taken her away.

Not a day passed without her remembering how she found Marinette those years ago. In the middle of an old room, eyes open, unconscious, wounds all over her, blood all around her. She remembered the room, the earth tones, and the smell of it, the path made of blood that started around her and went to the window, the shattered glass of the window that Marinette must have broken to get in that room.

Every little memory of that place was still vivid for her. Every time Marinette laughed, she saw it, every time Marinette cried, she saw it, and every time Marinette hurt herself –with something as little as a piece of paper- Alya was transported back to it. And she could endure it, she could live with those memories because they were in the past because she had Marinette right in front of her and she didn't remember that horrible room or the pain that she must have felt.

What was going to happen now? She was going to know the truth and that probably would trigger something inside of her mind; the subject was too heavy to let it slip. What was going to happen without those protections? She would be in danger again and Alya couldn't lose her.

But, she wasn't alone anymore, she wasn't the only one protecting Marinette. Nino and Adrien were here and she knew she could count on them. Maybe that's why the hard decision she had just made didn't feel so heavy on her shoulders. Nino and Adrien were holding the weight with her now, and she had to trust them.

She sighed. "I'm going, Marinette needs my help," She smiled a little nervous.

"Have fun, it's going to be an exciting day for you too, I hope everything goes smooth," Nino said, smiling warmly at her.

"Take care of my suit, okay? I want to look good," Adrien winked at her, with those words he tried to bring back the joy.

"Do you ever look bad?" Alya crooked a brow. That was exactly the answer Adrien was expecting, and it made him giggle.

"Do I ever look bad, Nino?"

"By all the rules of Earth the answer to that should be yes, but I have no proof of it, so I can't assure it,"

Alya gave a big laugh before leaving the room.

 **xx**

 _Marinette is acting strangely._

That's what Alya had said to Adrien.

Obviously, she hadn't meant for Marinette to hear it, so Marinette acted like she hadn't. It bothered her, it was the truth but Marinette didn't want Adrien to know, not today, or at least not now that she was going to have to interact with him.

Marinette pretended she had not seen Adrien come in. Taking her phone, she opened her latest chat and texted Nathanael.

 _I can't do this._

Nath's answer appeared immediately, as he had been waiting for her to text him.

 _Of course, you can. Just tonight, Mari, it's just tonight. Pretend that everything is okay and if you need help don't doubt to call me, I'll pick you up. But remember, this is your night. Mari's night, not Ladybug's, not Chat Noir's, just Marinette the amazing designer._

Marinette smiled. He really was one of a kind, it was really sad that she wasn't in love with him anymore because he was the greatest. After last night, there was no doubt that he was an amazing person.

Marinette was so grateful to _still_ have him. He could have resent her and hate her after the breakup, but he did not –that wasn't him- and even if he did not, it wasn't his responsibility to take care of her or help her through her issues, he didn't have to take that extra mile for her.

 _Thank you for everything, Nath. I'll try my best._

"Marinette!" Alya's called her.

Marinette looked up, she was pointing at Adrien who was smiling and waving at her. It was time to put on a show.

She pretended to be surprised and walked in their direction. Marinette wasn't a good liar, so she wasn't able to fake a convincing smile, it was impossible to do it in that moment, when all the emotions were hitting her, falling on her shoulders like a heavy storm. She was going to keep saying she was nervous, she was going to keep bringing the same excuses so no one would ask if there was something really wrong, and she was going to keep quiet as long as she could so the truth wouldn't spill out of her lips.

"Hi, Mari," Adrien smiled at her once she was in front of him.

He looked radiant, not news to anyone, Adrien was made of liquid sunshine and solid star-dust, it was impossible for him not to shine and irradiate happiness. That was what Adrien Agreste was and she couldn't believe she had thought the opposite of him. But this was not the moment to think of that, this was no moment to think about Adrien Agreste at all.

"Hi," She gave a quick half smile, just to be friendly because this was Adrien, she couldn't be mean to him not even if she tried. "The hair stylists and the makeup artist are at the end of the room," She pointed them out.

"Hair and makeup? That's new," Adrien crooked a brow while looking at the improvised hair station at the interns' workroom. "My father, well better said, Nathalie, gives them a list of what acceptable and what is not and lets the interns help themselves."

"Yeah, but past years interns didn't have Marinette and his son attending with them," Marceline said appearing behind Alya.

"Makes sense," Adrien giggled. "But shouldn't you go first, you're the stars of the show after all,"

"Models first," The three girls said at the unison, which made Adrien laugh.

"Okay, okay," He said with his hands up, in front of his chest as he was protecting himself. He looked cute.

Marinette sighed and rubbed her temples with her tips of her fingers. She watched Adrien leave, making his way to the hair station.

He looked completely relaxed and he seemed happy to be there. Which was strange. In Marinette's eyes, he always looked uncomfortable in the workshop, no matter how well he was at hiding it, she had noticed it on multiple occasions. But today that wasn't the case, he looked like was truly enjoying the visit.

Adrien was happy, his guard seemed to be down and he was already cracking jokes with the team. He effortlessly charmed everyone around him; Adrien was the star of the show without even trying and that was going to help her tonight.

She could do this, she just had to let Adrien take the lead and she would follow. She was going to ignore everything and pretend life was great, that no problems existed and that her brain wasn't a time bomb with a missing clock. She was going to follow Adrien's lead, he wasn't going to disappoint her. She was going to trust Adrien tonight.

 **xx**

Alya had warned him: Marinette was acting strangely. He had an idea in his mind of how to treat her when she was acting this way, as Chat Noir he had stumbled with Marinette's odd actions multiple times, so he knew how to handle them. But today she wasn't acting on the strange ways he was used to seeing.

To start off, Marinette had changed his makeup style five times. She was organized, especially when it came to fashion, she had a clear vision of what she wanted and she rarely doubted her instinct when it came to these kinds of decisions and today she had spent fifteen minutes choosing between two eye shadow colors.

Then there was the chit-chat. Marinette was amicable with everyone and she never ignored a conversation but right now she would not shut up, she was rambling about everything and nothing, her words twisted and tangled between them and she was not aware of the no sense phrases she was throwing away non-stop. Rambling was equal to a nervous Marinette, but this degree of rambling had to bond to a different emotion.

If he was Chat Noir right now he would have asked, but he was Adrien and Adrien was just winning Marinette's trust, he couldn't ask what was wrong so simply.

Sébastien and Marceline also noticed Marinette's strange state, but they were too busy being nervous themselves to look more into it than what met the eye.

While he was getting his makeup done, he followed every step Marinette made, trying to figure it out from that distance what could be bothering her. He was especially worried about yesterday's collapse, what if it happened today? Marinette had to focus on shining and show off her amazing designer attributes, she did not have time to freak out today. Adrien wanted to make sure that she had the time of her life, that was the goal he had set up this morning, he wanted to make her night memorable and her odd attitude was messing with that goal.

After half an hour of following her with his eyes, Marinette sat in front of him, finally ready to get ready for the party.

Once the hair dresser started playing with her hair a relaxed expression appeared on her face. Adrien smiled at it, he knew how much she loved when people brushed her hair, he did it all the time as Chat.

"Mari," He said, almost stuttering.

"Hmm?" She rose a brow, keeping her eyes closed and her relaxed face on.

"Are you nervous?" He asked softly, worried.

Marinette didn't answer immediately, but she opened her eyes and looked straight at him.

Adrien wasn't sure of how to react to said action, he had to step back so much as his civilian self, he had to build those walls and pretend that she did not know Marinette as well as he did and sometimes it became confusing. To choose how to act in front of Mari was a tiring game.

"How many scars do you have, Adrien?" Marinette spat out.

Adrien, astonished, leaned back. That was so not what he was expecting. He waited for a moment, expecting a nervous and apologetic Marinette appeared, but she kept looking at him, waiting for an answer.

"I'm not sure," That wasn't a lie, he had lost count of them, "Why are you interested in that? It came completely out of the blue,"

"I was adjusting the last details for your suit watching at your reference pictures and realized you have one in the palm of your hand. It's one I hadn't noticed before, it just made me wonder," Adrien wasn't sure how to keep the conversation going.

Marinette had seen his scars before. Now that he thought about it, it was impossible for her not to notice, she took his measures and had reference pictures of him, of course, she had seen them. Still, this was the first time she brought them up… why? He didn't believe her catching interest on them just now.

"Oh, yeah, I have a few scars… I wasn't at the best place in the akuma attacks," He didn't want to lie about the real reason of the scars, but he couldn't reveal his identity just yet, so that was the closest thing to the truth that he could think of.

"Ah," Marinette closed her eyes once again. "Akuma attacks must have been rough. Sometimes I get flashbacks of them, there are ridiculous ones but most of them scare me a little. I can feel the panic of the people as I had been there… I mean I was but, I can't remember,"

"Yeah…" Adrien said, since the hairstylist and the makeup artist didn't include themselves into the conversation, the tension hung between them.

"You should go get dressed," Marinette suggested, "Someone will help you, once I'm ready I'll go and give the final touches,"

"Alright."

 **xx**

"How many times have I told you that frowning like that will make you wrinkle?" The voice interrupted Adrien's thoughts, "And clenching your teeth is bad too, the dentist has told you so, also numerous times,"

The relationship with his father was better and stronger now, but his words still made him a little scared and he took them as commands. He relaxed his face and put his tongue between his teeth. If he was honest it was starting to hurt.

"It's strange to you to be here, dad," He worried about his interns, not all of them, but he did, yet he never showed it. It was odd for him to be at the workshop at these times when he usually was ordering Nathalie around about the latest details of the party.

"I wanted to see Marinette's work before anyone else,"

"You're on luck, I'm on my way to dressing up," He answered immediately, trying to avoid Marinette as a subject of the conversation.

"I'm glad, I'll help,"

"You don't have to,"

"But I want to. It's been a long time since I used you as a mannequin, Adrien. Must say you were always my favorite," Adrien smiled warmly. Coming from his father, that was a compliment.

"Okay," He shrugged.

Gabriel walked by his side, in complete silence until they entered the room he had allowed the designers to use as a dressing room.

Marceline was there, standing in front of a mirror sewing the last details of her own dress, with her model sitting next to her, helping her. Her dress was green, with a queen Anne neck decorated with emerald green squints and stones, drawing a Celtic pattern that followed a path to the back of her neck and then the ended at the back of her dress. Her style had always been more risky and edgy than Marinette's; it suited her.

"Any last-minute problems, Mademoiselle Béraut?" Gabriel asked, winning a jump of surprise from Marceline in response.

"M. Agreste," She answered, her voice shaking. "Not at all, I'm making sure the sequins at the bottom won't fall out,"

"Splendid," Gabriel nodded. He turned to Adrien, "Why are you taking so long?"

Adrien sighed. "It's a beautiful dress, Marceline," He said, "Do you know where my suit is?"

"In Marinette's hanging rail," She pointed out at the silver rail to his left, "It has your name,"

"Thank you, "He nodded and walked to pick up the hanger with his name on it. The paper was thicker than he imagined a post it to be so he took it off. Finding a note from Marinette instead of a simple tag.

He was excited until he realized they were instructions of how to carefully put the suit on. He understood her, she wanted everything to be perfect and she couldn't let anyone, especially Adrien ruin it.

He read every instruction with all the attention he had, making sure to not disappoint her. Once he got to the last one there was a surprise.

 _These instructions are not necessary, I know you will be careful with my work. I trust you, but I feel better if I write them (I always do)_

 _We're a team tonight, let's do our best!_

Adrien's heart fluttered and his cheeks may have been red, but he ran behind the curtain before anyone could notice.

While he was dressing he couldn't keep Marinette's words out of his mind, they were echoing in her voice.

She trusted him! She trusted Adrien!

He wasn't sure what had happened to change their relationship so drastically. Well, he had worked hard to get in Marinette's good side but he didn't know it had worked so fast!

And she had called them a team! Marinette considered him part of her team, that was what made him the happiest. If she already considered them a team and he trusted him now, it was going to be easy to get Marinette's approval once he revealed he was Chat Noir!

Adrien stared at his reflection for a few minutes, mesmerized with the smile on his face. He didn't remember the last time he had been this happy. Yeah, everything was still a mess and they had multiple problems to fix, still, things hadn't been this bright for a very long time. He had found Ladybug, Ladybug was Marinette, a woman he loved; a smart, talented and caring woman as he always imagined Ladybug to be. She considered him a good person, in and out of costume. It was nice to have those facts.

"Adrien, are you ready? I don't have all the time in the world,"

"Yeah, yeah, one sec!" This time he admired the suit. He looked fantastic, not that he expected any less of one of Marinette's works, but even after seeing the suit and tried it on multiple times, today it looked like a completely different piece.

It was a beautiful suit, with little details of a tuxedo, so you couldn't exactly tell what it was. The slopes were made of velvet but they didn't look tacky in contrast of the soft fabric –a fabric he still hadn't figured it out- the blacks matched perfectly and the silver buttons and other details were subtle but effective.

He looked taller and more sophisticated, the turtle neck of the black shirt adjusted perfectly, letting him move and breathe without any restrictions –something he always feared with those type of shirts-.

The suit was just pure perfection and his hair and makeup were the "cherry on top". The light plum eyeshadow and black eyeliner, with help of his loose messy hair and the hidden braids gave him a mysterious touch to the elegance of the suit.

Marinette was really a genius.

"Adrien…" His father longed the "e" of his name as he always did when he was impatient.

"I'm going, I'm going," Adrien opened the curtain and walked to the middle of the room, so his father could admire his friends work better.

"Wow!" Sébastien entered the room. Stars in his eyes as he watched Adrien, "I don't know if to compliment your genes or Marinette's works—

"Both," Gabriel cut. A smirk all over his face, he was very pleased with the result. "She did an incredible job, it fits you like a glove. And she had it ready in such little time, just as I expected," Adrien didn't answer, he let his father keep rambling, the only time he did such a thing was when he was around clothes and for some reason Adrien had always enjoyed it.

"Is Marinette still in makeup?" Marceline asked. She seemed more relaxed with Gabriel's presence now.

"Yes, but she was finishing. She said she wanted to fix a few details on your suit before dressing up, so I would wait here,"

"What details?" Adrien looked down, trying to find what could be wrong with his clothes.

"You won't find anything, son," Gabriel patted his back, "In fact, only her will see things to fix. And not matter what you tell her, she won't believe it's perfect until she sees it in the party,"

"Designers are weird," Adrien muttered, making the people in the room laugh.

"Mll. Béraut, M. Pascal are you and models ready?"

"Yes, sir," They answered at the unison.

"Perfect, let's go down stairs," He ordered, "Adrien you wait for Mademoiselle Dupain Cheng here,"

"Alright, "he waved goodbye and mouthed "good luck" to Marinette's friends before they disappeared off the room.

He wanted to sit and wait, but he wasn't sure if he could sit yet, so he stood until Marinette arrived.


	22. The One with The Party (pt2)

As Sébastien had said, Marinette did not take long in appear in the dressing room. She ran inside as if she had left the stove on or something.

Adrien was still standing next to the rail with Marinette's dress on it. He had been tempted to peek and see the design she had brought to life –she had shown a few to Chat Noir in paper and he had been dying to see it in fabric since that day- but he had resisted, waiting for Marinette to show him.

"Oh no," Marinette sighed, throwing her head back and making a pout.

"Wha-at?" Adrien said with a little stutter.

"I knew it, I knew it, I knew it," She said under her breath, without answering to Adrien. She moved across the room and took her bag with tools, bringing it back to where Adrien stood. Without a warning, she opened Adrien's jacket and she started stitching the end of it.

Adrien didn't speak, it was not the right moment. So, he watched her work, it was always mesmerizing. But today he did not focus on the moves she made, but in the makeup and hair, she was wearing.

Her eyeshadow was also in plum colors, darker than his but plum still. Her eyeliner was ticker and ended in a long wing, making her eyes pop. Her lips were painted in a soft pink that helped the look not be so harsh on her delicate face. There was not much blush going on, maybe because Marinette tended to blush easily and didn't need help in that department.

Her hair was tied up in a low bun made of braids with the detail of a pale pink ribbon intertwining with her hair. Also, she was rocking fake bangs, which made her look younger than she was.

"You look beautiful, Marinette," It slipped from his lips. He was going to say it once he saw her with her dress on, he had been planning it so he wouldn't sound cliché or creepy, he wanted it to be perfect, but there he was ruining it.

Marinette stopped sewing and stood up straight, she looked him straight in the eye, calmer than he had ever seen her.

"Thank you, Adrien," A genuine smile appeared on her lips, cheeks staining with red color, confirming Adrien's theory. "You look handsome, too. Black is definitely your color,"

It wasn't what she said but the way she said it that made Adrien tremble.

"I don't think I can do much right now…" Marinette had shifted back to the suit, touching the fabric between her fingers she analyzed one more time the mistake that Adrien could still not find. "Did your father liked it?"

"Very much," He assured her with a smile. "He said you were incredible,"

"Do you think its incredible?"

"Absolutely," He nodded vigorously "I had seen it before but somehow it looks better than ever, and it makes me look _soooo_ hot." Marinette let out a big laugh, she threw her head back a little, her nose wrinkled and she covered her smile with her mouth. "What? You don't think so?"

"You know you're hot, don't make me feed your ego, you will have enough of that once we are in the party,"

"They're gonna get to see you first, so I will be overshadowed by you, my ego will get hungry," Marinette clicked her tongue, a mechanism she used to stop her from laughing.

"We'll see, we'll see," She sighed, "I'm gonna go dress, you can wait downstairs if you—

"I'll wait here," Adrien interrupted. "We are a team, right?"

A dark shadow appeared over Marinette's eyes, Adrien saw all the playfulness of seconds ago evaporate, still she answered, "We are."

When Marinette disappeared behind the curtain, Adrien dropped the fake smile he had been putting on.

He had enjoyed the bonding moment they had just shared, but something inside of him didn't let him appreciate the moment as he wished he could have. Not as Adrien at least.

It was true that Marinette was opening up to him, he was nicer and kinder than she had been at the beginning, and he hadn't heard her curse that much for a while. But Marinette couldn't have changed her vision of him from night to morning. Yesterday, things were still off between them.

This wasn't the way Marinette acted around Adrien, that was the way Marinette acted around Chat Noir. Carefree, kind and playful, that was the girl that had become friends with his superhero persona, and while he loved the thought of Marinette acting that way to him –he loved the few seconds he had gotten just a minute ago- it didn't felt right because it felt pretended.

Maybe she was putting up a persona for the night, so she could hide all her fears and doubts behind, relying on Adrien to go through the night.

But that didn't sound like Marinette, she was straightforward and she did not use people. No matter how fake the attitude felt, there were no damaging thoughts or plans behind them, if she was nervous she would tell him, she would ask for help, she wouldn't pretend. This was something else.

Adrien paced around the room, letting his thoughts run in circles, trying to find an explanation for today's behavior. Sometimes he wondered how much of it was a secondary effect of the horrific situations Mari had gone through and how much of it was actually the girl he once knew. If he knew that it would be easier to deal with her, to help her somehow. He never knew where he stood with her.

"Adrien," Marinette called. The curtain opened a bit showing half of her body to him.

"Yes?" He crooked a brow.

"Help me with my zipper?" She asked, and walked backward in his direction, with her hands on her back holding the dress.

"Is that the most comfortable way to walk?" Adrien chuckled.

"I want the dress to be a surprise," Marinette said between clenched teeth.

That was a good argument, so Adrien didn't tease her more and did what she had asked for.

From this side, he could see a see-through fabric on top of a soft lavender that only let the shape of Marinette's legs to be seen. The A-line gown was decorated with small Swarovski crystals reflecting the light across the dress in asterisk shapes –that could only be noticed at this distance, if not the dress looked like it had been covered by starlight-. The dress was backless, so the zipper was under the half of Marinette's back, only there to tighten it and hug her body better. And if that was the back, Adrien couldn't wait to see the front.

"Done," He announced once the zipper and the button were ready.

"Thank you," She said, turning her head to him "Now close your eyes, you've seen a little so you can imagine, but fake to be surprised anyway."

He chuckled and nodded, then he closed his eyes and waited. He heard the sound of heels hitting the ground -walking away from him- the sharp breathes and the click of her tongue before she spoke again.

"You can open your eyes now," He did.

In front of him, Marinette stood, and the vision was surreal.

The front of the dress continued with the amethyst and lavender colors with the Swarovski crystals, that he had already seen but her chest was made of galaxies. The crystals around her chest gave the illusion of the absence of fabric, it made it look as if Marinette's skin was engraved with stars. The open back was nothing with the deep cleavage on the front. It was connected to the back of the dress by a slim branch of starlight that fell like raindrops to the top of her chest and then there was a shower of cosmos all over her chest to the start of the skirt.

He realized that the scar on her chest was missing, probably work of the makeup artists. He did not want to comment on that, he wasn't even sure if Marinette had realized that he had seen it. He was going to focus on how incredible the dress was, how incredible _she_ was.

"So? What do you think?" Marinette whispered.

Had he been staring too long? Was he drooling? Was he making her uncomfortable?

"Uh…" He shook his head, "It's incredible, you're incredible, it's… marvelous, I… it's like galaxies, I…

"I was inspired by them," Marinette interrupted, "When I woke up… of the accident, I thought I liked astrophysics –I don't know if I have told you before- I'm not good at it, but since then I've always been interested in it, and well… yeah,"

"As an astrophysics major, I approve," Oh, that sounded so cringe-worthy, but he had already said it, he would have to own it now.

Marinette giggled and looked at him with warm eyes.

Yeah, whatever reason was making Marinette act oddly was worrying, but right now, it didn't matter, because those warm eyes that had always welcomed him, that had always loved him were right in front of him. Those warm eyes were his lady's and when he watched those beautiful sparkling eyes, nothing could go wrong.

"Thank you," Marinette smiled one more time.

Too flustered to keep looking at her eyes, Adrien shifted his sight to her side, to where the clock was. It was time to go.

Adrien bowed in front of her and once up he offered his arm to her.

"Ready to go, my lady?" Adrien knew it was a dangerous choice of words, but he missed calling her that.

Marinette took his arm and stood beside him. "Ready to go."

 **xx**

The party was exactly what Adrien was waiting it would be.

On his modeling days, he had attended to multiple types of celebrations thrown by fashion magazines, so he had a good idea of what to expect. And what he had expected from Vogue was the same elegance and modernism that was displayed right in front of him.

The party was being thrown in one of the biggest rooms of the Grant Ritz Hotel, and from the moment you put one foot on Palace Vendome, you could be able to know it.

At the entrance of the hotel, there was a line of guards who welcomed them with a polite head gesture, after them, there were two beautiful girls dressed in short sparkly-golden dresses that gave their greetings to the guesses as they arrived. Once you were inside the building, the show continued with big luxurious signs that showed you the way down the party room.

And if the path to get to the party had been luxurious, the party itself was just ridiculous. The hotel salon was big enough to have that much decoration and still let people get inside of it.

The first thing you would notice as you stepped the room, where the big platinum capital letters that spelled "VOGUE" at the end of the room. They were so big and shiny that they didn't let you see the other diamond-like decorations around the room. There were big chandeliers in gold and silver with fashion motives hanging from them, mirrors at the walls with black signatures of famous people of the couture industry, and where there weren't mirrors there were posters of old VOGUE covers.

Every piece of decoration did not seem to go with each other, except for the fact that they were all shiny, but somehow it still worked as a whole.

Inside there were more girls dressed in sparkly dresses, entertaining the guests with a coordinated dance routine. The waitresses were dressed in gold shimmery tuxedos with spiky masks that only covered one of their eyes. The music was loud but not overwhelming and the lights on the roof changed colors every once in a while, hitting the fake diamonds and shine surfaces, turning the salon different colors too.

It was too much for Adrien and Marinette didn't seem to like it either.

"It's so… bright," She whispered, blinking a few, trying to adjust her eyes to the light.

"It is," Adrien agreed. "Are you ready?"

"You have been asking me that non-stop, you're more nervous than I am," Adrien looked down, trying to check out if Marinette was looking as tense as her words sounded.

"Maybe I am… it's been a while," He lied. He wasn't nervous anymore, but Marinette was, so he could pretend to make her feel better.

"Uh," Marinette took his hand between hers, "It's going to be great, if I can do it then there's no doubt that you can do it too. Maybe no one will remember you,"

Adrien grinned.

"With such a gorgeous lady by my side, I don't think they'll see me," Marinette punched his arm, flustered by his comment. "You're right, it's going to be great. Let's do this."

Adrien offered his arm, Marinette took it and stood close to him that what he had anticipated, but it was nice, nothing could go wrong now. He escorted her down the hall and they went to greet the first guess.

 **x**

Two hours passed and Adrien wasn't worried anymore.

Marinette was smiling and Adrien was impressed with how no one had ambushed him yet. Yes, a few designers and photographers he had worked with before had recognized him, but they had been nothing but polite, asking about his whereabouts and congratulating him on his comeback to the fashion world while being a professor at a prestigious school.

But, he wasn't the center of attention, _Marinette was_ , and he couldn't be happier about it.

He called the attention of people but once they saw Marinette's stunning dress, he passed to be an accessory to her, focusing only on the beautiful woman with the incredible talent, just like Gabriel had planned.

Marinette handled the guests as the professional designer she was, explaining her inspirations and her techniques, giving away details that made them want more, details that kept them wondering. They would shower her in compliments and work offers, but Marinette was humble and centered, she didn't give away her excited emotions and she answered to all of those words with the politest smile.

It was only a matter of time for Marinette to get her eerie behavior back. It started slowly, with her stepping back from him, being less sincere with the guests and putting on a fake smile.

When Adrien got one of the rare moments when they got to be alone, he whispered in her ear.

"Are you okay?"

"Just a little headache, nothing to worry about," Marinette sighed, shouting her eyes closed and ducking her head.

"You want to rest somewhere? It won't hurt anyone if you disappear for a few minutes," Adrien suggested. He placed his arm around Marinette's shoulders and squeezed her tightly.

"No, it's okay—"Marinette massaged her temples with her fingertips. She didn't look well.

"You don't look okay, Mari,"

"Is just the decoration… everything is _so_ bright, it must be hurting my eyeballs,"

"You sure?" Adrien rose a brow.

Marinette smirked, it wasn't as convincing as other times because the pain was still all over her face. "Totally. Let's get a glass of rosé, I've been wanting to try this expensive one for a while now,"

"Alright," Adrien accepted.

Marinette took Adrien's hand and guided him through the crowd, trying to find one of the waitresses who had the long glasses of rosé. In the middle of their path, they were ambushed by Marceline.

"Nette," She whispered, it was obvious that all the emotion and enthusiasm she had when jumping in front of them had disappeared when she had seen Marinette's face. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Just a little headache, is nothing," Marinette said between her teeth. "Is something going on?"

"Kind of," Marceline shrugged "Vogue wants a picture of us together,"

"Now?"

"Now,"

Marinette sighed. Then she turned to Adrien.

"Where should we meet after this?" Marinette asked.

"Nowhere, I'll go with you and wait in the back,"

"But it's going to be boring," Marinette protested

"I don't mind," He grinned and stepped in front of her, following Marceline.

Marinette smiled too. She wasn't feeling good but he somehow made her forget that.

When Marinette arrived at the fast-set they had prepared, Sébastien was already there, but by her surprise, Gabriel Agreste was not. Well, maybe he had gone back to his old habits, or he was greeting more important people than their interns -which was highly probable and the most real excuse to his absence-.

"Oh, you must be Marinette!" The photographer shouted at her when she saw her, "Finally, we've been waiting for you for so long,"

Marinette put a fake smile, she wasn't in the mood to speak back. She greeted her with a handshake and took her place for the picture, beside Sébastien.

"Are you feeling okay, _mon_ _cherié_?" Sébastien asked, stroking her hair when she was close.

"A headache, nothing big," She answered, trying to hide her annoyance. she knew they worried about her, but getting the same question over and over was tiring.

"Alright, let me know if it gets worse, I have medicine if you need it,"

"Thanks, Seb," She genuinely thanked him.

" _Alé, alé!_ Let's take this picture fast!" The woman said, who Marinette couldn't name because she had no idea who she was and she hadn't introduced herself to her "Marceline move a little bit to the left!"

Marinette took a step closer to Sébastien, fixed the wrinkles on the skirt of her dress and looked up to the photographer one more time. She was still directing Marceline to move forward and asking people who were watching to step back, so Marinette didn't look at the camera, she looked at the man behind the photographer.

Adrien was smiling at her, it wasn't an amused smile, but a reassuring one. When he noticed she was watching him, he smiled wider and winked at her. He knew she was nervous. For how long had he known? The whole night? Probably, she was being a fool by not noticing earlier, how could he not notice? He always did, he always took care of her…

The flash of the camera erased every thought inside Marinette's brain, the juxtaposition of Adrien's face and the light were the only things that she could see. She felt like all the strength of her body was evaporating and leaving her, she felt dizzy and nauseous. She couldn't tell if she was still standing or had fallen to the floor.

She blinked a few times, her headache becoming stronger as the seconds passed. She felt Sébastien's hand on her arm and without knowing how she looked up at him, he was talking to her but she couldn't understand anything. As if it was instinct, she looked to the front one more time and put on a smile. The flash came once again, and it made everything worse.

Marinette couldn't breathe.

 _The dark walls were staining on the light, following her like a wave would. She kept running, the voice on her head screaming to do it faster, to call reinforcement._

 _"He can't know!" She screamed back. She wheezed and coughed, she was getting tired and the air seemed to be disappearing._

 _"Marinette!" The pitched voice screamed her name in utter terror._

"Marinette!" Marceline snapped her fingers in front of her.

She still felt lost but she wasn't in the dark anymore. Chills were running up her back and her body felt like an electric wire.

"It's over?" Marinette gasped.

"Yes… Mari, you look awful you should— Marceline stopped. Marinette looked up. Adrien had his hand on Marceline's shoulder, he gave her a look that she seemed to understand and took a step backward from Marinette.

"We are going outside," Adrien announced. He grabbed her hand and pulled her closer in an abrupt move, something unusual coming from him.

"I'm—

"Don't you dare," Adrien warned between clenched teeth, looking at her over his shoulder.

She didn't say anything after that, not because she didn't want to, but because she couldn't. Her breath was stuck in her throat and the dizziness was becoming overwhelming; the shiny decorations of the party weren't helping her at all.

Adrien took her out of the salon as fast as a bullet. He managed to dodge anyone who could have become an obstacle to them, and he guided her to one of the terraces of the first floor. This terrace had little fairy lights decorating the plants and a lamppost every few meters, but that was it, which made Marinette think that she would feel better in a few seconds.

She did not.

The lack of air was becoming unbearable and her nausea now made her vision go blurry. Adrien was holding her arms and standing in front of her, whispering something that she could not understand. She tried to focus on his words so she could go back to normal, but the voices and images inside of her head were messing up with reality; one second she could see Adrien's blurry face and the other she was back at the mysterious and dark place, where a light was trying to reach her.

 _"Marinette!" The voice called her name once again._

 _"Where are you?!" Marinette kept running, not knowing where to go, it felt like she was running in circles "Tikki!"_

 _"Marinette, run!"_

 _"Not without you!"_

 _"Marinette, go! I can't only hold him a little longer!"_

 _"No!" She screamed back, jumping to dodge the ray of light that had almost caught her. It was easier than it had ever been, to run, to jump and to keep fighting, but she knew this wasn't a good thing. She put her hand against her chest and whispered "Thank you, just hold on a little longer,"_

 _She jumped one more time but a ray surprised her._

 _"Marineeeeeette!" She heard Tikki's voice again before she fell into the dirty ground of the cave._

 _The energy took over her. Again, it was the pain of not feeling all over again, it was the pain of moving without commanding her own body. It was over… she had failed._

 ** _He can't know, he can't know, he can't know._**

"Mari! Princess, please!" It was Adrien's voice.

Marinette opened her eyes, she was still seeing a little blurry but it was impossible not to recognize the face in front of her.

Adrien was right in front of her, calling her name, asking her to answer to him. He was cupping her cheeks and rubbing his thumb on her skin. His voice sounded calmed and controlled, his face did not show the same emotions: he was suffering, he was worried and he was tearing up.

What could have happened to her to get this reaction out of him?

Marinette thought about his talk with Nathanael.

"Are my eyes purple?" She whispered.

"Pu-purple?" Adrien blinked a few times, he looked as he was trying to decode what she had just said.

"Yes, purple…" Marinette looked down, avoiding his sight, worried that he would answer with a yes.

"No… they are not," Adrien said to her happiness. He put his hand on her chin and made her look at him. "Are you feeling alright?"

"No," Marinette started tearing up. "No, I'm not. I'm tired! I'm so, so tired!"

Adrien wrapped his arms around Marinette in a hug that made them fall. He quickly changed their weights so she could fall on top of him, instead of him in her as it was about to happen.

Marinette was surprised but she didn't complain, she needed a shoulder to cry on. She let all her anger and confusion out in that moment. She held Adrien close and she let the rainfall. She was sobbing uncontrollably and trembling, but Adrien never said a word, she just let her cry. He held her back and rubbed her back in slow calming strokes. He kissed the nape of her head and played with her hair

Marinette cried and screamed, she hit Adrien's chest a few times, she mouthed intelligible words, and Adrien just kept holding her, and that was enough. It was exactly what she had been craving for years, she just didn't know it until that moment.

When her tears started to fade away and she was only a mess of sobs and hiccups, she let Adrien go. She sat down at his side and started taking big breaths, trying to make her breathe steadily once again.

Adrien, without taking her eyes off her, sat down in front of her.

"Marinette…" He whispered carefully.

"Yes?" She asked in the middle of a hiccup.

"What you…. your… the purple eyes, thing…" Adrien sighed, "For long have you known?"

Marinette crooked a brow "For long have _you_ known?"

Adrien was taken back, he gasped. "I…Thursday," This time Marinette was the one who got surprised.

"Thursday? Are you telling me the truth?" She asked but in her mind, she was making counts, and it did make sense that he had found out about this Thursday. He was there when she woke up and she couldn't remember what had happened. It made sense with the facts Nathanael had told her.

"I am." He assured her. Marinette nodded.

"Nathanael told me about it last night," She finally answered. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, I… I didn't know if—" Adrien stopped, his eyes wide open as something clicked inside his head. "You aren't asking how I know…"

Marinette couldn't hide it any longer. She had promised to not freak out and act like she was oblivious as she had always been, but the moment called for the truth.

"I know you're Chat Noir, Adrien,"

xx

Hi **everyone! Just wanted to thank you all for reading this fic, it means a lot to me. I wish** i **could answer to every comment but I don't think FF has a function to do that? If you want that you should comment on my ao3 :)**

 **This chapter took me so long, so I hope you enjoyed it, now the good things** **are supposed to come lol. You can find me on** tumblr **btw my** url **is buginettte (yeah with 3 T)**


	23. WE ARE A TEAM

Not long after Marinette's revelation, the clouds covered the sky and it started pouring. It was almost as nature knew that they needed a push to continue their conversation, because after Marinette had spilled the words the tension between them had turned into a big bricked wall.

Neither had let a word come out of their mouths, they hadn't moved a finger; they just stayed there, suspended in time, as if Marinette's words had marked the end of the world but instead of the seconds going faster, they turned into an eternity. So, if it hadn't started raining, Marinette and Adrien would have probably still been sitting in the same place in the middle of the terrace.

Not wanting to come back to the party, they found a bench under a glass ceiling where they could sit. Marinette was in one extreme and Adrien in the other, as far as each other as they could be while still trying to be close.

Adrien knew he was the one who had to break the awkward silence between them, Marinette was waiting for him to react, maybe give an explanation. But he wasn't sure where to start. There was so much to say and he did not know what to say first because he did not know how much he was allowed to confess or how much Marinette wanted to know.

The only way out of this wondering was by making a question to Marinette, and while he thought that was not the best way to break the ice, it was the only way he could be careful.

"When did you figure it out?" Adrien asked, his voice low and trembling at the end.

"Last night," Marinette's answer came fast and strong.

"Huh," Adrien clicked his tongue. Marinette suppressed a laugh at the gesture, not fast enough for Adrien not to notice. He did not make a comment about it, but it helped him to feel more relaxed. At least Marinette was laughing, that was good.

"Are you mad at me?" He dared to ask, looking at her for the first time after the revelation.

"I don't know," Marinette sighed, "I want to be and maybe I am a little bit… I think I was mad at you last night but… I don't know anymore,"

"I would understand if you were mad, Mari. You don't like liars after all,"

"Yeah… but I wouldn't label you as a liar," She massaged her temples before looking at him, "You offered to reveal your identity multiple times, and I was the one who refused… apparently, some things don't change, uh?"

Adrien opened his mouth to answer but his mind stopped in something he had not realized before.

Marinette was talking as if she knew everything, not only his identity. And hadn't she asked about her eyes before? That had no correlation with him being Chat Noir, well not that he knew of. It didn't matter, it was strange.

Nathanael knew that she could transform into Ladybug so Marinette was probably aware of that now but he was not sure because Marinette had only talked about her purple eyes and Nathanael could have given an excuse as an answer. Well, to be frank, that didn't sound much like him. It was better if he asked her directly.

"Marinette…. You understand who you are, right?" He asked. He did not find a better way to formulate the question so he let out the first thought out of his mind.

"Understand? I don't know if understand is the word I would use," She chuckled ironically, "But as far as I got from the conversation I had with Nath last night and what I read on my diaries… I'm or at least _I was_ Ladybug,"

Adrien nodded, he rubbed his eyes with his fingertips before continue speaking. He was going to need vacations from all the stress this month had provided.

"Why did you read your diary? Alya told me that you packed them and stocked them so you wouldn't see them"

"You," Marinette tilted her head, "I read them because you confuse me, and your presence makes things fuzzy and that makes me anxious," She sighed, "I had never felt the need to look for answers, not ever, in fact, it has always been the opposite. Even when I woke up and I did not know where I was or who the people around me were, there was one thing that I knew and it was that I did not want to remember the past. Inside my mind there is this tiny voice that was always whispering to forget the past, to just move on, to not look for answers and I heard it because things were better when I did. Every time Alya brought pictures or letters my whole body ached and my mind started spinning without control, I felt like I was going to go blind, it was… it was just awful, but you already know that you have seen a few of my attacks too"

Adrien moved closer to Marinette, still leaving a space between them, and put a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm not saying it's your fault…

"I know what you are trying to say, Mari," He said with a kind expression on his face. "I can't imagine how frightening this must be for you. It's already complicated and a little bit shocking for me, and I'm just an outsider compared to you,"

"I wouldn't call you an outsider, from my perspective I am," She put her hands in fits "There was so much information on those diaries and I couldn't grasp all of it, it was too much to bear. And also, Nathanael helped a lot, he gave me answers but since he doesn't have a deep knowledge of what is going, his answers are not that shocking, you know? They don't come with a certain explanation that could throw me off,"

"I see how that can be considered good, but I bet you're wondering about those facts. You want those answers, don't you? That's why you revealed what you knew, or am I wrong?"

"I mean, I guess I want to know, but I didn't want to know tonight. I wanted to enjoy this night, but then the lights were so bright and when the camera flashes hit me I was gone… and I couldn't stop thinking about it," She sighed, "And you followed me and I couldn't contain it any longer, I needed my friend…"

Adrien smiled brightly.

Marinette considered Chat Noir her friend, he didn't have a doubt about that, but she had, or at least used to have, a rocky relationship with him as Adrien. For her to just accept so easily that he and Chat Noir was one and the same, and not scream at his face for "tricking" her, was the best thing in the world. Yes, she had not said that, but she called him a friend, so even if she was mad, she didn't want to cut ties with him.

"I'm glad I was here, then," Adrien squeezed her shoulder, "Is anything you to ask me now? I know things are weird right now, but I'm at you disposition"

"Well, after not wanting to know anything at all for years I would like to know a few things now, "She chuckled, "But I think I'm gonna start with questions that are not that close to the "mystery"

"Ask away," Adrien pointed at himself with both of his hands in a swift motion.

"Did you become my friend because you knew I was Ladybug?" Adrien didn't expect that question, either the sadness on Mari's eyes. But he understood why she was asking that. For her, she had befriended someone new, someone she had ended up loving and caring about, and to know that they didn't want to befriend you for you, would be horrible. "I mean, I was a bitch to you, as Adrien and a little bit at the beginning as Chat,"

"I did not know you were Ladybug, Marinette" He assured, leaving a meaningful pause, "When I left France, Nino did too and he had his drama with Alya and I thought I was being a good friend just cutting ties with her too, to support him you know? It was stupid but I thought it was the right thing to do back then, and I didn't put you in the same bag as Alya, I planned to speak to you but you never did, now I know why but back then I thought you were sort of doing the same thing as I did, but to support Alya so I did not give it much thought and I didn't try to contact you. So, when I saw you when I was back and you didn't remember me, it just smashed my heart. I realized how much I missed you and that maybe after all these years… maybe I still had a little-tiny-bit crush on you, so I befriended you, and as Chat it was easier than doing it as Adrien,"

"A crush?!" Marinette shouted, ignoring his last words. Her cheeks were stained in the reddest shade he had ever seen.

"Yeah," Adrien shook his head, "Don't say anything you had a crush on me too, you named your cat after me"

"That was subconscious," Marinette hit his arms, Adrien laughed even if it had hurt a little "Don't tease me!"

"I'm sorry it's above me, princess," He shrugged. Marinette pouted but after seconds of actually being mad, to faking it, she finally smiled.

"So, we really are friends," Marinette stated, looking away from him.

"We are," he nodded, "May I ask you something before you continue with your own questions?"

"You may," Another smile.

"Nathanael doesn't know who I am, or I sure hope he doesn't, but anyway, uh. Did you read it in your diary? That I was Chat Noir?"

"Yes. I went on my own and searched for answers on my diary, and I read that I was Ladybug, that was too overwhelming and I needed someone to give me straight answers and in that moment, I wasn't sure if Alya was going to give them, so I went to Nath's. After Nathanael told me all he knows, between those things he said he had seen me once change into a weir-dark-Ladybug and I knew I had to know more, I couldn't ignore it any longer," She sighed, "I came back to the bakery I took the diaries I had already started reading and I read and read until I tied the knots. I wrote a lot about you, but as separate humans, still, at one point it was undeniable"

"When was that?"

"When I figured it out I knew or when old Marinette knew your identity?"

"When did old Marinette know who I was,"

"A few months before defeating Papillion," Adrien gasped, surprised and a little bit of betrayal all over his face.

"You-you-you," Adrien gasped again, "I can't even ask you why can I?"

"Why didn't I tell you?" Marinette crooked a brow, "I read it,"

"Yeah?" He looked right into her eyes.

"Is weird to talk about it because I don't remember it but, it seems like I was shocked that my best friend and the guy I had a crush on were the same people. These two incredible people who I loved so much were the same and I was scared, I think I wrote something like: if the boys I loved the most were one then my heart couldn't handle to have all that love and give it to just one person, the amount of power you held against me was… I didn't tell you at first because I was trying to figure it out, and once I did I was going to tell you… I wrote it down I can show, I had planned it."

"Why didn't you? You wrote that?" Marinette nodded, "Tell me, please,"

"You told us, Alya, Nino and I that you were moving, out of the country, because that was the only way you could study what you wanted," She said, remarking every word, "I, past me, knew that if she revealed herself then you were not going to leave. And she, I, couldn't do that to you"

Adrien opened his mouth to deny that statement but in his core, he knew she was right. He would have stayed, with her, because it was just like Marinette had written in her diary, his heart would love her so much that he wouldn't be able to bear with the separation. She had too much power over him.

Adrien felt Marinette's hand against his cheek, she was leaning closer to him, searching for his sight.

"I'm sorry," Adrien took her hand between his and pressed it even closer.

"Don't be, I understand," He took a big breath. "let's continue with your questions,"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I shouldn't have asked, it is your turn, your more lost than I am," Marinette nodded, she kept her hand on his cheek, stroking it softly.

"Alya knows, doesn't she?"

"She figured it out you were Ladybug years ago and she has been taking care of you, she knows sometimes you switch to a strange version of LB, she knows it happens when you're angry or extremely anxious, she also knows how to bring you back. Last Thursday, if it wasn't for her I don't' know what I would have done to bring you back," Adrien didn't mention more about that night, he wasn't sure if she wanted to hear it, "She had her theories but nothing concrete. She's been working with us,"

"Of course, she knew," Marinette shook her head, "I've always suspected she knew something, of me being "vigilante" but I was never sure. She is too clever and noisy to not know, right?" Adrien nodded in agreement, leaving out a laugh of pure joy.

"That's our Alya,"

"I'm a little mad at her, though" Marinette admitted, "But it makes no sense. I asked her to keep quiet, to not try to spark memories, and that's what she did. Still, I… feel like this was way too important for her to just shut her mouth. She never shouts her mouth!"

"She loves you, she would never hurt you on purpose so, she followed your orders. I know she wanted to but your happiness was more important for her. She is a great friend."

"I know," Marinette sighed, "That's why me being mad at her doesn't make sense but I can't shake it off…"

"I understand," Adrien nodded, "Are you sure you're not mad at me? Because as I said before, I would understand."

"I'm not… I feel, disappointed, maybe? You explained why you didn't contact me as Marinette, but… as I see it and for what you have told me, you were a hundred percent loyal to Ladybug, to me, you _love me_ … why did it take you so long to come back?"

Adrien had answered to that question before, but it was harder to let the words out in front of her. He knew she had been through a lot of terrible things, he didn't know the detail of them –because neither did she- but it was enough to feel extremely guilty. He always thought something had happened to her, it wasn't like her to cut all communication out of the blue, but he never got the courage to actually come back and seek for her.

"At first… at first, I thought something had happened to you and I called you like crazy, but a part of me, a little voice inside my head always pulled me back and told me to stay where I was, that you were strong and nothing bad had happened, that you only needed your space. Time passed and I got worried again, especially because something was off with Plagg too but he convinced me that it was nothing, that he was having a hard time adapting to our new home, he had to be hidden must of the time so I believed it. I tried to track you through the _Ladyblog_ but there were less and less news, nothing pointed at you getting hurt or killed, you had just vanished and at the end I—"Adrien got ready to admit something he hadn't said out loud to anyone"—I came to the conclusion that you didn't want this life anymore, it was understandable, we hadn't had a normal childhood and I remember how excited you were about university so it made sense. And if you didn't want this life anymore then that means erasing me too. You refused to reveal your identity even after defeating him… so, I just accepted that."

"I would never cut you out of my life!" Marinette cupped Adrien's cheeks and leaned even closer than before, her nose almost touching his. " _Not ever._ I know I've been horrible to you and I've cursed and ignored you and other things, but you're Chat and that's enough for me. You are confusing and make things around me go, oh my god so crazy, but you also make me feel safe and I love you so, so much. I've had a hard time trying to recognize what feelings I had for you, _chaton_ , and its just pure love, I love you so much and after reading those diaries I finally understand why. My brain may not remember you but my heart does and because it loves you so much it's playing tricks on my mind, so I can finally find my way back to you. And—oh my god don't cry, kitty"

But Adrien couldn't stop, once the first tear had dropped he knew it was impossible. She was there in front of him, holding him, telling him that she loved him. How could he not cry? His amazing, incredible and treasured friend was back with him, and she still felt the same for him that she had felt years ago even if she couldn't remember it.

His heart was about to burst and throw confetti, fireworks, anything that could show the happiness it was feeling.

Adrien took her by her waist and pulled her body close so he could be able to hold her in his arms. Once he put his arms around her, he squeezed tight, resting his head on her stomach. He swore she was never going to let her go, not again.

"Oh, kitty," Marinette said, brushing his hair with her fingers, "I know my words aren't the most reliable, but I can assure you this: I missed you too,"

"I thought I was never going to see you again," Adrien said between sobs. "I love you so much!"

"I love you too," Marinette kissed his hair.

Adrien sobbed, "Just give me a few minutes and you can continue with your questions,"

"Take all your time, Adrien. We have time, I promise,"

"You shouldn't be the one comforting me," He said half-laughing, half-sobbing.

Marinette giggled "Well, we are a team after all, not one-sided relationship here,"

"We are a team," Adrien nodded, "The best one."


	24. Invisible Scars

It was going to be a restless night.

Alya had not asked Adrien to keep her updated but she was extremely thankful that he had been messaging her through the whole night. He knew her well.

She was feeling calm, lying on her bed with a bowl of gummy bears deciding what to watch on Netflix until the disastrous message appeared on the screen. It was short, precise, yet terrifying:

 **Marinette knows.**

Adrien was smart and cared for Marinette enough to not reveal his identity, or hers, that night, which only meant the worse, Marinette had remembered it, and those were bad news. Alya was used to the odd behavior Marinette showed when she was remembering little things, it was subtle but you could tell something was wrong, but she still had to get accustomed to the breakdowns Marinette had when a big memory crashed against her. It was surprising and heartbreaking, she was never going to be prepared for one of those, it hurt every time.

She was ready to go out of her house and drive to the Ritz when she heard knocks on her window. Nino, in costume, was waiting for her to open.

And now, after a big discussion and multiple frowning glares later they were both sitting on the floor of Alya's living room, sight glued at the roof, and having a calm conversation, well, as calm as Alya Césaire could be at this situation. The mundane conversation was interrupted several times by her questions and sudden plans of escape, but Nino was able to bring her back to the floor every time.

"What's happening with your fake-relationship? I've not kept up with the celeb gossip lately," Alya sighed, if she couldn't talk about the top worry on her list, she could talk about the one that took second place.

"I don't know and I don't care, my agent and publicist have been trying to talk me about it but I hang or change the subject every time they do. I just want to focus on music, that's what I've always wanted… also, I've been trying to get a job as a music video producer, so I try to keep them busy with that,"

"Music video, uh? That sounds like you, you enjoy movies just as much as you enjoy creating music,"

"Yeah,"

"Yeah," Dead end, again.

"It's always going to be like this?" Nino asked, turning his head to look at her.

Alya copied his motion "Us?" Nino nodded "I guess… I'm not sure,"

"I still lik—I still _love_ you," Alya's breath got caught on her throat. She knew this, she shouldn't be surprised by it. Their conversations, their meetings, all of it made it clear that he still loved her, and she was happy, oh so happy, but hearing the words made everything real, and more hurtful.

"I do too," She admitted, there was no point in lying, "Why did we break up?"

"Different paths. We weren't sure we would see each other again, I had to stay in LA for at least two years, you had to study hard so you could get good internships abroad," She knew that the question had been rhetorical, still listening to the reasons again made them sound stupid.

"Oh, right," Alya sighed again, "They're logical reasons,"

"They are," Nino agreed, "Then why do they sound so stupid every time I said them out loud?"

"I don't know, I thought that only happened to me,"

Nino held Alya's hand, she squeezed it back.

"I should go to Marinette's,"

"Adrien is with her, she is okay," With his free hand, Nino tried to pull her back to the floor but Alya resisted. "If you don't want to keep talking about us, you can just say it."

"Is not that. I do want a talk, I want to resolve this as much as you do, believe me, I do but—

"It's not the bigger issue," Alya nodded "That's one of your flaws: you obsess over one thing and you can't see the others. You are aware of it, right?"

"Of course, I am, I hate it too, okay?" Nino half smiled. "I understand Adrien is Chat Noir and that they share a bond that is stronger than any other friendship, they've been through hell and back together and it only makes sense that he is there with her right now but not being there for Marinette is eating me alive! I don't like being in the dark!"

"Hey, hey," Nino sat by her side, wrapping her in a thigh hug. Patting her back and pulling her head closer to him, so he could comfort her better. "Your bond with Mari is special and just as strong as theirs is, and you also been through hell with her, don't underestimate yourself, Alya Césaire." He kissed her nose. Alya giggled.

"I won't," She answered. "I still want to go, Adrien has not shared more information,"

"I don't think he has revealed more stuff. He said he was going to introduce her to Plagg, that's already pretty big, he won't hit her with more than that tonight,"

"Still, I believe—"The ringtone of Alya's phone interrupted her mid-phrase.

Alya crawled her way to the coffee table and took her phone, almost dropping it.

"Adrien?" Nino crooked a brow.

"No… my contact at the penitentiary," Alya stared at the screen as the phone kept ringing.

"Papillon," Nino gasped. Alya gulped. "C'mon 'Lya, answer,"

Alya took a big breath before tapping her phone.

"Vincent?" Alya came back to the same place she was before, to seat close to Nino. She held the phone between them so he could also hear the conversation.

"Mdm. Césaire! I apologize for calling this late at night, but you asked me to get you the news immediately"

"Yes, yes, I'm so glad you called!" As nervous as she was, she was really happy with having a response.

She was waiting for the call but the recent problem with Marinette had distracted her and made her forget about it.

The first thing she did after the meeting was calling Vincent, and the old guard who had helped her more than once and in whom she trusted dearly. He usually got her news or gossip that she could use as a lead for further investigations for her reports and news articles and in exchange, she made sure to send him old letters and stamps for his collection.

"It's confidential information so I beg you to keep it a secret, my job is at risk," He asked.

"I won't tell a soul," Alya promised, talking over his words. "You will remain anonymous as always."

"Not even anonymous is safe, Mdm. Césaire,"

"I promise I won't name you at all then," She was not going to write anything about it in magazines or newspapers, but Vincent didn't know that.

"I trust you, miss," He sighed, "They've been keeping this as a secret for a long time, I'm sure they don't want to cause any reaction from the public, but is still strange for them to keep this under lock and key,"

He took a meaningful pause. Alya did not interrupt, which was odd but Nino did not point it out.

"He is dead, Mdm. Césaire,"

"What?!" Alya shouted. Nino had to cover his mouth so he wouldn't scream too.

"He died years ago. He was trying to escape, he fell off the fourth floor, got severely injured, obviously, but was still alive then. He died in the ambulance carrying him to the hospital,"

"Damn…" Nino gasped.

"But, why would keep this a secret? Paris would celebrate his death, of that I'm sure," He had caused so much damage to the citizens that as nasty as it sounded, there was not a drop of mercy when it came to the man behind the mask.

"Oh, I was sure that would peak your interest, it peaked mine as well," Alya could hear the smile in his voice, "This may be your alley, miss: His last visit was no one else than Miss Spots— yeah you heard me right, Ladybug herself came to visit him before she vanished out of the face of Earth.

"Ladybug? What was she doing there?" He said, "before she vanished". Marinette had her memories then, she went there willingly. Why?

"No one knows. Ladybug asked to talk to him alone, the guards stood outside the interrogation room after making sure he was correctly hand-cuffed. I asked if they could hear something, but they say it was a very peaceful talk. Just in case anything happened, one guard watched them from a little window, he said Ladybug and Papillon sat in front of each other, barely moving, whispering. Then she left, looking as she was about to cry. On the other hand, Papillon was smiling from ear to ear.

Vincent kept telling her about the different stories and theories other guards had. Alya kept asking little details, trying to reach for more information to help her come with a better theory herself. Nino wrote down every word and piece of the conversation he thought was important for future research.

After ending the call, Alya and Nino remained in silence, trying to grasp the new piece of the puzzle. How was this visit connected to everything?

"Marinette visited that monster before she went missing. That's suspicious as hell, Nino!" Alya shouted. She was stating the obvious, but the silence was killing her and she needed to say something.

"It is but, please, don't freak out," He warned, which only made Alya start freaking out.

"How can you _not_ freak out!" She snapped.

"Because he died Alya. It's a dead end!" He answered in a lower tune "We need to find more information before we assume things. I still believe that the other holders are a good place to start. I know is odd, but we can't ask Papillon because he is dead, and we can't ask 'Nette because she won't remember. Let's not bring this idiot in the mix until we have information from the other holders. Mr. Agreste was going to talk to them today, okay?"

"No, not okay! This is big, Nino. We need to call Adrien."

"No!" Nino shouted, "We can't tell Adrien, anyone but Adrien."

"Why not?" Alya leaned away from him. A little scared for the seriousness of his voice.

"He is terrified of him, Alya. I don't know what went down in that last battle, they never told anyone what happened, but just by Adrien's reactions when he hears that name I can tell is more than they ever let the media know. Something horrible went down there, and Adrien still carries the weight of it,"

Alya sighed.

"Alright, I understand," "But I still think we have to let his dad know,"

"Well, yes, you're right. We'll call him tomorrow morning, he may have information for us too,"

 **xx**

Marinette rolled on her bed. She touched the edge of the mattress with her fingertips, and tugged the sheets tight around her body, trying to find ease in the warm sensation. But nothing worked.

Tired of trying to fall asleep again, she threw the quilt and sheets away and stood up from the bed, standing in front of the window and looking through the glass the beautiful street with luminous lamps.

She wasn't expecting an easy path, she knew that for her to recover her memory she was going to stumble with difficult obstacles. But her truth was harder to handle than she thought possible.

She came back to her apartment with Adrien, still comforting her and cleaning up her mess at the party with help of her father, whom who would have thought was also involved in the story and promised to help and handle the "party situation".

Marinette sighed. She looked at her bare feet, the marks of the high heels still there, leaving red paths at the sides. The heels she wore were beautiful, carefully selected to go with her handmade dress, the dress that she had spent weeks on. Designing, cutting fabric, stitching, putting it all together, and finally finishing by sewing sequins and fake -but high quality- jewels.

All those hours of stress, the sleepless nights and times of despair had been worth it, so worth it. She was proud of her dress, it was one of her best works to date, and she had been so happy to be the one to wear it… and now, it was back on its hang, on her curtain rail, only after a few hours of being in the spotlight.

It was a shame.

If only her past hadn't come back to bite her she would still be enjoying the beautiful dress.

Marinette looked back to the bed, realizing for the first time since she woke up that someone was missing.

She asked Adrien to stay with her until she fell asleep. Was he so correct that he left once she was sleeping?

Marinette smiled in amusement. She opened her bedroom door and walked into the living room, looking for her partner.

" _Minou_?" She whispered. The street lights and the moonlight were the only illuminations for the room, so she was careful with her steps, trying to not stumble with any piece of furniture or fabric she left on the floor.

"He is on the sofa," Marinette gave a little jump. She managed to muffle the pitched scream, covering her mouth with her hands. She completely forgot about that little big revelation earlier in the night.

The little cat-fairy was floating in front of her, the darkness made his fluorescent green eyes more iridescent than before, making Marinette more terrified of them.

"Thank you," She stuttered. She looked down and then held her head high once again, "I'm sorry for jumping like that, my mind is still trying to process everything,"

"You'll get used to it. No one can resist my awesome appeal," Marinette giggled at Plagg's words. Maybe he was right. "And is true that I can't remember you being Tikki's girl, I do remember her telling me that you called her a bug-rat when you met her. So, I think that with time you'll love me too, Spots"

 _ **Tikki.**_ That was the name that had been haunting her. And now she finally had an answer.

Tikki was her kwami, the little creature was some sort of mini god that helped her transform into Ladybug. It was her who held the powers of creation and luck, and shared them with her so she could become a heroine.

She was _that_ important. And that's why Adrien, who dodged every heavy question she made, decided that the only revelation he was going to give tonight –besides the ones from earlier- was introducing his kwami to her and explaining his function and role in this magical mystery. Because Adrien and Plagg wanted to know if she remembered Tikki.

She did not. She told them about her weird dream sequences, and sudden flashbacks, where she called Tikki's name and heard, what she assumed, was her voice, telling her to run, to be safe. But that was all, she didn't remember anything about her.

"You and Tikki had known each other forever, right?" Marinette asked.

"Pretty much. We could say she is older than me because without her I wouldn't be her. Something has to exist to be destroyed, and for things to exist they need to be created. And Tikki is that: creation," Plagg explained. "Now, I'll be back at our apartment, the lack of cheese in this house is terrifying,"

Marinette giggled. Plagg huffed before crossing the entrance door without opening it. He seemed like fun. She wondered if Tikki was like that as well. She mentioned her a lot in her diary, she could tell they were close, but she did not have enough descriptions of Tikki herself.

Marinette walked further, to the sofa where Adrien was sleeping.

He looked so peaceful and calm, his features were so soft and elegant under the moonlight. It was a different look than the one she usually saw. Adrien was always cautious, a little bit scared of Marinette, he tried his best to hide it but Marinette could tell, and she didn't blame him, she did not show her best side the first time they met –or well, met again-. And Chat Noir was always goofy and kind, but she always saw something else, he was never fully relaxed. To see him like this, sleeping on her couch, not worrying about her, was a beautiful sight.

 _He_ was a beautiful sight.

Marinette cupped her cheeks, feeling them warmer than before.

What was she thinking anyway? What were her feelings towards him today? Why did she have to keep wondering? Why was she so unsure of her feelings?

Only two days ago she was sure she had figured it out her feelings towards Chat: Love but not romantic love. But then she had remembered Adrien, and now she knew Adrien was Chat, and all the "now" feelings were mixing with her past feelings and her body felt like it was going to burst and turn into confetti.

She sat on the side of the sofa, her head leaning against the arm, hugging her legs close to her chest. She gave another look at the sleeping boy in her sofa, catching in the corner of her eye a cat about to attack her host.

"Don't you dare," She warned as strong as she could while still remaining to keep her voice in a whisper.

The cat growled, but walked away from Adrien, jumping to Marinette's arms instead. It moved in circles until he felt comfortable and lied in her lap.

Marinette petted his head, "I'm sorry, I know I've neglected you but don't attack Adrien, he is a good kitty, I promise."

"As I've said before he is jealous because I'm the better cat—

"Jesus fucking Christ, Adrien," Marinette clenched her hands and tried to cover her face with them at the same time. Too many scares for so little time.

"Sorry, princess didn't mean to startle you," He apologized.

"How long you've been up?" She asked. Her breath still shaking.

"I just woke up I promise," He chuckled. "Cat-Adrien's tail hit my face… wait should I call it Cat-Adrien or Chat Noir now?"

"I hate you," She slapped his leg, crossed her arms in front of her chest and pouted.

"No, no, Mari, it was a joke," Adrien wrapped his arms around her shoulders. He hid his face in the crook of her neck, "But, really how do I call it?"

"It's Adrien, and if you try to tease me again he is going to be the only cat I'm gonna pet for the rest of my life,"

Adrien gave a dramatic gasp, "You're cruel,"

"You're annoying," Marinette let out a big gasp of air. "Okay, now you're up, move your annoying skinny body and make room for me on _my_ sofa,"

"I think this is my sofa now, I use it more than you. The floor is all yours—ah, don't look at me like that, I'll make room,"

Marinette giggled, she wasn't sure what face she had just made but his reaction had been funny.

Adrien stood up, letting Marinette sit with her legs crossed on the left corner of the sofa, then he came back to lie on the sofa, this time his head on top of Marinette's legs.

It was the usual position they had adopted when they were together, but tonight it was more comfortable than ever. Chat Noir's suit was great for fighting crime and run on top of the rooftops of the old city of Paris, but wearing it indoors started to get uncomfortable after a few hours. Now as Adrien, he was as comfortable as he had ever been in this apartment.

"How is that Alya hasn't smashed my door, yet?" Marinette asked. Drawing circles with her fingertips on Adrien's neckline.

"Damage Control is Nino's middle name," Adrien explained. "But, also, I believe they found something else to keep Alya occupied. Nino gives me space, but he is being too quiet"

"Something about me or you think they're finally all over each other?" Adrien snorted. "What? It's gonna happen sooner or later, they can't hide it any longer,"

"Yeah, yeah," Adrien nodded, "But I think it's about you, maybe even about me…" Adrien sighed "He was sending me updated on Alya, and asking about you but he stopped. When he finds a clue or new information he texts me immediately, and he hasn't done that so I think he is trying to protect me,"

"Protect you from what?"

"Papillon…" Adrien took a deep breathe, "We divided assignments. I take care of you and try to figure it out how and why you turn into a weird version of Ladybug. Nino has to keep decoding books and trying to connect information from them to what we know about you, my father has his own information and now he had the contact with other miraculous holders, who he had to reach for help. Finally, Alya was supposed to find more about Papillon,"

"You think he can still hurt us?"

"Not physically…"

Marinette understood immediately. It was in the way his body tensed, how his eyes were not glimmering, and the old conversations that returned to her head; he always avoided talking about the man who had terrorized Paris. Something had happened.

"Let's change subjects," Marinette suggested.

"We don't have to, you can ask… at some point, I'll have to stop dodging the conversation. It was easier before, but now you know and you deserve to know your own past too.

"But it's not important now, Adrien. It's a memory loss problem, right? Let's try to fix that first, and wait for it to come back

"What if it doesn't?

"Then I'll ask you and you'll tell me," Marinette kissed his forehead, "Now you can tell me about these other holders. Did I know they existed?"

"These ones my father is trying to contact, no, but we studied the miraculous together, we knew other sets existed. They are divided into zones, maybe the word region is better? I can't remember exactly, it's been a while, but it's basically the same set of miraculous powers with different animals."

"So, someone else out there can destroy a building by just touching it?"

"No, I mean I don't know—See? Wrong word again, eh, not powers but energies and elements associated with them, the Chinese element chart, to be precise. For example, Nino is the turtle of our set, and his associated element is water. I know Nino has some sort of healing magic, so I suppose someone, somewhere, must have a similar power to his, I don't know if the same as him, but—ah, don't laugh at me, it's been so long and I suck at explaining!"

"I think you're doing a great job, _chaton_ ," Marinette touched the point of his nose, "I understood what you meant, and that's the only thing you have to worry about."

"Still, I'm mad that I don't remember! We spent so much time studying and reading about it, you know? And now I can barely explain,"

"Your brain is full of stars and black holes, those hard to understand too, believe me, I tried to study them,"

"Did you?" Adrien rose a brow, now he remembered what Marinette and Alya said about Mari's strange likes and personality after waking up, all of them seemed to be related to him.

"Yeah, I was really sure that I was interested in that, not that is not fun, but it's not my thing," Marinette sighed, "It's yours… just like studying abroad

"—and cursing a lot," Adrien added, "You do it less and less now, have you noticed?"

Marinette blinked fast, "Now that you mentioned it, you're right… I hadn't notice. You cursed a lot?"

"Yeah," Adrien gave an amused smile, "I was out of my father's sight for the first time ever, I felt so free and curse in English are really easy to include in your vocabulary, they're so catchy," Marinette laughed.

"True," Marinette threw her head back, "So basically, I picked up everything you were doing at the moment when I disappeared?"

"It is what I think too," Adrien nodded. "I don't know how to explain it though"

"I do," Plagg popped out of nowhere, sitting on Adrien's hands.

"You do?" Adrien asked skeptically.

"We assume our lovely miss right here was in danger, which makes me believe she called you, asking for help,"

"Oh," Adrien sat down in a swift move, almost hitting Marinette in the face. "That could be the rare energy you felt from Tikki?" He asked excitedly.

"No," Adrien's face changed immediately, all the happiness disappearing. "This is completely different, it has nothing to do with my connection with Tikki, this is a connection between you two."

"Like a magical bond?" Marinette asked.

"Yeah, we can call it that…" Plagg rolled his eyes. "Let's say you are… ugh…remember that term you said, ugh you said it on one of your classes the other day, the really boring class you were giving," Adrien frowned, "This kid wouldn't stop asking about it. Something of two stars having a common center of gravity,"

"You were so bored you picked up almost everything, uh?" Adrien chuckled, "Binary stars, it's called binary stars,"

"Yeah, whatever. I think that suits you better,"

"Mari and I are binary stars?" Adrien asked confused.

"You share the same energy, you have a common 'magic-center'" Plagg said, "The longer you have the miraculous and make use of them together, the stronger the bond between you guys turns, it makes you better in battle, more coordinated. The bond exists because _you're_ yin and yang, you need to complement each other… now, this only works when you're transformed, when the magic is all over you,"

"But we're not sure if I was transformed, I don't have Tikki now," The guilt was imprinted to her words.

"I was getting to that, don't interrupt," Adrien took a look at his kwami. Plagg didn't sound annoyed by Marinette not letting him continue, it seemed like he was annoyed because Marinette's question was smart and deserved another elaborated answer. With time Plagg had shown to be more mature and serious than Adrien ever thought possible, and since Tikki and Ladybug had disappeared he always gave the answers he needed, he was always honest and he didn't run around trying to dodge the questions, but now it seemed like he was doing exactly that. He gave a real answer, but not the one they were asking for.

"I'll say you're special…" He shrugged.

Marinette opened her mouth to speak, she looked annoyed and ready to claim a more elaborated answer, but Adrien interrupted.

"Does it have to do with what happened in the battle?" He balled his hands into fists.

"Yes," Plagg nodded. "The connection between you two is stronger because of that… I would dare to say that Marinette's anxiety attacks and shifts into Ladybug could also be associated with that connection. Last time, when she had purple eyes, I did not only feel akuma energy, I also felt yours. Once you calmed down, to try to help her, the energy vanished, and so did Marinette's purple eyes."

Adrien stood up from the sofa, pacing back and forth. Marinette looked at him, not sure if she should say something.

Only moments before she had let the subject pass by, it was clear that Papillon was a delicate thing to talk about, but now it was back, and it made her more curious than before. He had mentioned the battle… what had exactly happened there?

There were little to no videos of that day: a few news reports, low-quality snapchats, and twitter videos. Testimonies of people who had been close to the battles, and a few pictures of the superheroes running on the streets and bringing back citizens that had been taken by the villain to get the miraculous as ransom. Between them Nino, but who had been unconscious the whole battle so couldn't provide any useful information.

The identity of the man had been kept secret and the trials were never televised or covered by the media.

So basically, the only humans who know what happened were Papillon, who Marinette knew was in jail and probably would never tell her anything; her, who couldn't remember a single thing about that day, or any other's as Ladybug for the matter; and finally, Adrien, who remembered everything but was scared to talk about it.

Marinette wanted to know. Marinette needed to know.

"Can I ask Plagg?" Marinette whispered. She kept looking at the floor while she did.

"You said you were gonna ask me later…"

"Yes, but now… I think I deserve to know, and if you are scared of—

"I'm not scared of talking about it!" Adrien snapped. "I will when I'm ready!"

"Don't yell at me," Marinette stood straight. Adrien had never talked to her like that, and she didn't like it, no matter what was the reason behind that behavior.

"Then don't ask, you just said that we could talk about something else,"

"That was before Plagg revealed something important. I'm not asking you! I'm asking him and he doesn't need to tell me everything, only what he thinks made the connection appear,"

"Not tonight, Marinette," Marinette wasn't sure if that was an order or a beg.

"Adrien, please!" Marinette took a step closer, "It's about me, it's important! I deserve to know the important parts. I know is hard but that's why I won't ask you,"

"The important parts? Every part is important, Marinette and you don't remember anything so how can Plagg now what to tell you and what to keep, uh?"

"Adrien, calm down," Plagg slapped his cheek, winning an angry glare back from his holder.

"She just said that," Adrien mumbled the rest, his anger clearer and clearer every second that passed.

"Adrien, she deserves to know, she lov—

"Okay, okay! Do you want to know what happened? Like the important part?" Adrien let out a scary giggle. Marinette tried to take his hands again, but he held her by his shoulders. She felt an electric shock on her body and when she saw herself reflected on his eyes, she saw her purple eyes glimmering, but Adrien didn't seem to care, he was in a whole other world.

"Adrien, calm down," _Calm down, calm down, calm down, calm down._

"You really wanna know?! I'm such a great superhero, so smart and so agile! So, great, that I died, Marinette! I fucking died!" He shouted and started laughing uncontrollably. He let her go, but stood in the same place, laughing, grabbing and pulling his hair. Tears started streaming down his face.

"Adrien," Marinette froze, not sure what to do, not sure if she was going to lose it soon too.

"Go to your room, Marinette," Plagg said. Marinette was about to refuse, but the cold glare of the kwami made her shut her mouth again. "Go. To. Your. Room. Marinette."

Marinette nodded and ran to the bedroom, closing the door behind her. She pressed her back on the door and fell to the floor, the tears were already rolling down her cheeks. She covered her mouth with her hands, trying to stabilize her breathing.

Everything was going great and now she was back in the nightmare, in the dark, scared, crying and with the sound of Adrien's crazy laugh in the background.


	25. Cold Weather

**_(oops im so sorry it's been so long, but here's a new chapter! thanks for the lovely comments/likes/faves/etc tho i mostyl post in ao3 , a big reason of why i keep writing is your support, so thank you very much! (this changed names in ao3 im not sure if i can do that here, but i'll try. the new title is_ crystal memory, _and i'll make sense when the time comes. all the love, c.)_**

Marinette was on Alya's arms.

Her best friend had been hugging her for so long now, that she couldn't even tell how many hours had passed since she arrived.

It was not part of Marinette's plan to call Alya for help. She knew that would only freak her out more. However, after the events of the past hours, of course, nothing worked as Marinette planned anymore. She ended up calling her only minutes after she began crying. But she realized it was for the best. She needed her best friend to hold her and calm her down, just as she was doing now. Now was vital, required almost; especially considering when her other best friend, her other half, had gone mad in the middle of his living room.

When Alya arrived at her apartment, Adrien was already quiet. His voice was silent and the crazy laugh that had once resonated throughout the apartment had died down only minutes after she locked herself in her room. She didn't know what Plagg had done, nor could she understand what had happened. One minute, Adrien was screaming like a psychopath in a horror film. The next, after hearing Plagg's whispers and seeing and iridescent light that had leaked through the door, a loud thump against the floor could be heard.

Marinette was still afraid of the consequences she could suffer if she went to check to see if he was okay. Alya had said he was okay, that he appeared to be asleep, and that Nino had moved him to his apartment once he arrived.

But it wasn't as simple. The thing was that Alya did not see Adrien losing his mind. It was impossible for him to happily sleeping after that entire escapade.

"It's my fault," Marinette whispered against Alya's chest. She could tell the shift in attitude Marinette felt by the way her breath pitched.

"Why you think that, Nette?"

She patted her head, attempting to soothe her by playing with strands of her hair. That usually calmed her down, but tonight it was not doing much.

"I was pressuring him. He warned me and I still pushed,"

"Marinette, _you_ did not know this was going to happen. For once _you_ had your _own_ interests in mind. That's not a bad thing. It just backfired this time, okay? And, besides, Adrien doesn't blame you either. I can assure you that. That man loves you too much and is too nice to do something like that,"

Alya kissed her forehead, "Believe me on this one, it's not your fault,"

"I triggered it, Alya, of course, it is my fault,"

"You were not asking him, Mari, you were taking _care_ of him. Listen, Adrien had this whole business unresolved. Yes, he has been to therapy but he can't tell the whole truth, and because of that, he can't talk about everything. He has all these feelings, all these fears and memories, bottled. He doesn't know what to do with them and because of that, he produces those reactions. If we need to blame someone, then it's the idiot who put you two through all of these. He's the cause of Adrien's behavior, not you."

"Still."

Alya was pretty convincing. It _was_ hard to go against that logic. However, she was still feeling guilty.

"Do you think I can go to see him now? I've calmed down a bit, he is asleep so he won't influence my anger and—

"Influence your anger? What does that mean?"

"Plagg said that the reason why my eyes turn purple and why I do all that weird-Ladybug-stuff could be bonded to Adrien's emotions."

"Do you believe that?"

"Plagg sounded convinced about it… that's why we started fighting. Plagg has a theory of why we are unusually connected. Adrien didn't want him to talk about it, and then… well then, he panicked,"

"Oh," Alya sighed, "Well I think I know,"

"Do you?"

"Yeah, we met with Juleka, I don't know if you remember her, but she's a really cool scientist slash doctor now, and well, she was involved in your case. She took samples of your skin, where the scar is in your chest and found out other cells that don't belong to you in them,"

"Like a virus?"

"Sort of, but not really. She said this wasn't anything like she had seen before. Juleka thinks it's magical. Yeah, she figured out that you were LB, but that's not important so let's talk about that another time. We also believe it to be magical. To be exact, Nino thinks Tikki and Nooro are inside you."

"What?!"

Marinette was thankful that she was sitting in bed; if not, she would've fallen to the floor and her head would've collided harshly against it.

Alya looked at her from above her. "Was that too much information?"

Marinette simply nodded. She had never put much thought into her scar. She let it be a mystery, just like everything else that had happened, and the scar did not seem to be relevant. The scar's color was indeed odd, but, she believed that maybe her skin had been infected, causing the weird coloration. Really, she had brushed it off just like any other weird things that surrounded her.

But now, just like every other little detail, this meant something. If what Juleka told Alya was real, then this is one problem that needs to be taken care of immediately.

Having a deity inside of you isn't something to be incautious of. It was important, something to keep an eye on, and given the situation, it was the fastest way to get the information she needed.

"Adrien knows this?"

Alya nodded.

"Does he think is plausible? What about Plagg? What does he think?"

"They both agree that this is not something impossible and that kwamis act in mysterious ways."

Alya sighed.

"We're not sure either. Nino told Gabriel and even Gabriel believes that there's a big possibility that Juleka is right. He called one of his contacts one more time to see if they could speed up their visit,"

"Who is coming?"

"Old friends of Adrien's parents that also happen to be miraculous holders,"

Marinette's mouth dropped.

"I know, girl, I was shocked too,"

Adrien knew more miraculous holders than them? Was that only _just_ a coincidence?

"How does Gabriel know them?" Marinette asked. It was too convenient that he did.

Alya did not say contacts, she had said, _old friends_. And _that_ was suspicious.

Alya bit her lip.

Marinette raised her brow. She knew that was going to be enough to make Alya speak again, she couldn't contain for too long, less if Marinette pressed her too.

"Adrien's mom was a miraculous holder too, the peacock,"

Marinette kept silent. She was taken back for a second, but, it did not feel like a surprise. She felt as if she had heard it before somewhere, as she knew that little fact.

But wasn't it strange? That Adrien's inner circle was so close to the miraculous? Was it really only a coincidence or did it mean something? If it did, was she also related to people who knew about these magical pieces of jewelry?

So many questions, yet it felt like she had such little time.

"Okay," Marinette said with determination. She stood up from her bed, put her hair in a ponytail, and walked to the door.

"Okay? Okay, what? Where are you going, girl?"

"It has to stop. The secrets, the questioning, the doubts. We have to be honest. All of us. And, we have to uncover this mess; it's time for me to join you guys. I'm a piece of the puzzle, right? I need to be there." Marinette sighed, "I know I don't remember much, but, we have my diaries and , sometimes, things happen that make me remember stuff. You guys, all of you, can help me trigger stuff. Maybe Gabriel's friends can help me remember too. But, we gotta try, we gotta start now."

"Are you sure about this, Marinette?"

"Yes," Marinette nodded, "It's time for me to remember and it's time for Adrien to find peace. I don't think he can find it without me." What Marinette did not say is that she also needed Adrien to find her own peace.

Alya shrugged; an amused smile appeared on her lips. She stood up and followed her friend to Adrien's apartment.

 **xx**

Adrien was not sleeping as Alya said. Adrien was still unconscious from whatever Plagg had done to him. He was in the middle of the living room, on top of the carpet, and all the furniture of the living room was in a corner, separated from him.

Nino was sitting by his side, legs crossed, hands on top of his head, and water circling around Adrien's hair.

"It is still so weird watching _you_ play _Avatar_ ," Alya said, sitting on his left.

Marinette stood still, watching how the water danced but did not spill because of Nino's hands.

"Can I do that?"

Marinette stuttered at first but then walked closer to her friends.

"Not exactly. Yours and Adrien's powers are different to all the other miraculous. Nino's miraculous powers come from the energy and existence of water, that's why Nino can control any shape or state of water. Now Marinette, Adrien and you are powerful thanks to energy itself, and energy exists in everything. You two can activate any sort of energy you want but only after it has been given to you, and it's only given to you when you really need it, and for what Plagg has told me, you never needed to control water,"

Marinette looked at the little deity that had answered her question. She was about to ask if they were a kwami, but at the last second, she felt like that was a dumb question. Of course, he was a kwami; probably Nino's, Adrien had told her that he was magical, but, never specified that _he_ was a miraculous holder too. Now, it was sort of obvious for her.

"Thank you," Marinette smiled, "I'm Marinette, but you probably know that already,"

"I do, but is still a pleasure to meet you again, Ladybug," The creature smiled back, "My name is Wayzz, I'm the kwami in charge of the turtle miraculous and the forces of water.

"I'm sorry I don't remember,"

"No problem, I don't exactly remember either, so you'll have to forgive me too,"

"How—"

"We don't remember you?" Plagg floated in front of her, "We are still unsure, and that's what we are trying to figure it out here"

"So…I'm not the only one who forgot?"

She knew this wasn't a motive to get excited, but not being the only one out of the loop was a gratifying feeling.

"Uh, I wouldn't say that. I did not remember you, but I was aware that I knew who you were before," Plagg answered.

"I remember multiple meetings with Ladybug and Adrien, but when I try to put a name or remember your face, the memories turn blurry. It's like your presence has been erased from our minds,"

"But only the kwamis did," Nino added, "So we concluded that your memory loss is not medical, but magical."

"She hit her head pretty harsh though, couldn't that aggravate the situation?"

Alya did not describe the head wound. She never described anything that happened that day, only giving vague explanations.

"Could be, but I'm putting all my money on magic," Nino half smiled.

"Me too." Marinette finally moved from where she was and sat left to Adrien's left, caressing his cheek.

"I don't have any medical training or so, but I've researched and seen lots of doctors. My memory loss never meets the profile and… there's the whole "feeling-the-world" thing. Who in their right mind does that?"

"Papillon," Alya whispered,

"She said in their right mind, 'Lya,"

"I know, but Papillon did. Papillon felt negative emotions, and that's how he akumatized people,"

Alya's words resonated on Marinette.

"Your theory! What Juleka said! It makes more sense, right?"

"You are awfully happy for someone who could have deities trapped inside herself," Nino chuckled.

"I've been avoiding answers for so long. You have no idea how great it feels to know and understand what is going on with me,"

"Okay, so as we wait for Adrien to wake up –he is going to wake up, don't worry- do you want to do a q and a?"

Marinette looked at Adrien. He _did_ look at peace now, and he seemed to be sleeping instead of being unconscious. There was nothing else left to do other than to wait.

"Sure, why not?"

 **xx**

Marinette was looking at the board with all the evidence. They sure had taken their time to make it look pretty. It had pictures, posts its, and was organized by a color-code. There were black, red and white strings connecting certain parts of the story.

She started analyzing the facts first, color-coded in green. She began adding pink post it's to every single one of the events that she somehow remembered vividly, or that she had seen in one of her dreams or flashbacks. So far, she had seen a lot of them.

Then, she moved to theories, in orange, adding her own thoughts on the ones she considered to be more probable to have happened.

Right now, she was reading through solo information that they had not been able to connect yet, those were in light blue.

This was harder to understand. To start, they had no idea how all of it connected. How was Marinette going to know? Second, there were certain terms and words that she did not recognize. She assumed they were related to the miraculous, but she did not want to wake up Nino who was sleeping on the floor next to Alya and Adrien, just to understand what they meant; and to end, most of them were just numbers that she couldn't figure it out what they really meant.

She wrote on a post-it beside one of them:

 ** _coordinates? page numbers?_** ** _time? a_ ****_re clues also number-coded?_**

"They're page numbers."

Adrien's voice echoed throughout the room.

Marinette got surprised by the sudden voice but hid it. It wasn't the time to look scared because of him not to make jokes about it. She trusted Adrien enough to know how he was going to react if she did do any of these actions, so, she preferred to be as calm and quiet as she could. She was going to let him speak first, then she wouldn't say any unnecessary words and he would be able to spill his feelings to her.

"Thank you," She murmured, turning around to look into his eyes. However, it was impossible to do so because Adrien had his sight fixed on the floor.

"I need to say something, before anything else," Adrien took a deep breath "I can't justify last night actions. I should have never spoke to you the way I did. It is unforgivable."

"It is not," Marinette said.

He had to know. He had to understand that she would always forgive him. "I pushed too far and—"

"No, you did not push too far. You were asking Plagg, and you were damn right to do so, but I interfered and acted crazy. I shouldn't have, there is no excuse, Marinette"

"Hey," Marinette cupped his cheek. He tensed by the touch and finally looked up, meeting her eyes.

"If someone knows a little of not acting like yourself, that's me. I don't remember it, but I feel all the rage and anxiety. It's like a hangover, and guilt takes all over you. You weren't in control of your own body and actions. And just like me, you were not in this world, alright? It was not you, it was… it was the trauma,"

"No, that's not it, this is different from you. You have magical trauma, _that_ is completely out of your control. But as for me, I have a post traumatic disorder that I have not treated. That is my fault. I have let these reactions continue, I haven't learned how to stop them, and because of that, I almost hurt you. I once hurt my boyfriend because of it, and yeah, he said it was okay but I could see in his eyes that it was not okay, because it's not"

"That's not true!" Marinette shouted "Nino said you went to therapy, that you tried! But you and I… we have gone through things no one else understands, things you can't tell anyone about."

"Mar—"

"And if it's someone's fault, then it's mine… I wasn't there for you,"

"No, no, no," Adrien lifted a finger and pointed at her. He was frowning, biting his lips and breathing heavily, "There is no way that this is your fault, Marinette!

"I knew who you were and I kept it a secret! I disappeared from the face of Earth without telling you! This _is_ my fault!"

"Plagg had to use his magic against me, Marinette! Do you think if you revealed our identities and called me every night to check if I was alright, I would have changed how fucked my mind is?"

Adrien was not screaming, but the rage in his voice was terribly worse.

She wanted to scream back. She wanted to assure him that if she had not kept the secret then they wouldn't be in the situation they were in now. She wanted to tell him that she couldn't remember, but that inside her heart and in her mind, there was a pulsing thought that made her sure that things could have been different if she had spoken about it all those years ago. She wanted to tell him that her mind was fucked up too, that she was afraid of getting her memories back because that would mean to find a reason to the suffering, and not knowing made it easier to go through the days, to go through life.

But would it make any changes? She doubted it. Adrien was headstrong and determined. She was just as she was. After all, they were different faces of the same coin.

So, Marinette kept quiet, and stepped back. She would try to fix the problem once Adrien felt more at ease. He had just woken up and realized the situation, the only emotion inside of him was guilt. She needed him to be able to feel more than just one thing, so he could make that clever brain of his work and not his powerful dominating sensible side.

Marinette turned back to the board and kept her focus once again on the facts that shined a light on her.

Adrien did not make any sound as he walked away from her. Years of being a cat-themed superhero had given him the skills of one, but Marinette could still tell where he was moving. At this moment it was just unpleasant; she wished she could just ignore him.

She tried her best to obligate her mind to fully focus on the story in front of her. It was written by Alya.

 ** _"Marinette asks Chloé for Adrien's number. They argue. Marinette begs Chloé to not tell Adrien about it, and cries"_**

Chloé? As in Chloé Bourgeois? From all people, _that_ was the person she selected to look for Adrien. How desperate was she? And why did she need Adrien's number if she knew he was Chat? Why was she so dumb?

She read another one.

 ** _"Marinette says she is going to Belgium. Marinette's parents think she is going to the USA. Marinette goes to Tibet, instead"_**

She knew she wasn't going to go to where she said she would, but, she did not understand why her lies had been so bad.

Marinette was about to read another one, however, a strange and warm sensation wreathed her. She turned around at the door, catching a glimpse of Adrien. He was doing the same as her, an equal odd expression on his face. He too was feeling it.

"Open the door, baby boy! I know you can sense Willem!" The voice of a woman behind the door could be heard. It was like a chiming bell. Beautiful yet startling.

"Who's that?" Marinette whispered frightened. The energy was making her dizzy.

"Help," Adrien gave a little smile. Finally, they were here.

Adrien answered and opened the door to reveal Gabriel and two strangers by his side.

Marinette would have loved to know who they were at that very moment but her organism had other plans in mind.

After feeling a lancing through her heart and the highest spontaneous fever she had ever had, she passed out, falling in the middle of the living room.


	26. THE ICE IS GETTING THINER

CHAPTER 26:

The house had always been too big for him.

It had been worse once his mother disappeared. When she was home she made the cold big halls cozy and luminous.

She would sing, she would bake, she would play loud music and run around the halls chasing Adrien or playing hide and seek if he was in the mood for it.

Gabriel, being a designer and by consequence, part of the élite of Paris, hosted many parties, filling the house with guests, waitresses, cooks, and other kinds of employees, but somehow, no matter how many people were inside, the house was still too big. Lonesome.

Even now, when all the people he loved were in the living room the feeling had not changed.

He was leaning against one of the pillars, close to the long velvety blue sofa where Marinette was laying.

Alya was next to her, sitting on the floor and holding her hand.

Nino was talking with Naomi, Willem, and his father. They were standing around a tall table that used to have a vintage telephone, but now there was a book open instead. Nino was explaining what he knew, and Naomi was adding her own interpretations, since besides being the "Ladybug" of her miraculous set, she had taken the role as the guardian of the stones, after the death of their past guardian.

He didn't understand why they had to come all the way here just to talk.

He already felt bad in his apartment, now the dark feeling of the mansion was making it worse.

"Adrien," Plagg said against his ear "She is going to be fine,"

Adrien didn't reply, and he didn't look at Marinette either. Once again, he wasn't able to anything to prevent Marinette's current situation.

"You heard Naomi, it's the energy and I can assure that. She will be alright," Plagg kept talking, "And her passing out like this just gives us more evidence towards our theory. Marinette does have a miraculous stone,"

 _Marinette passed out, she has been doing that for days now, I don't understand how this time is different. I don't understand why you are trying to brush off the blame I carry._

Adrien didn't know if Plagg could hear him, he had always wondered because it always felt like he did.

"I know you're not feeling good, that you feel guilty. But, you're a rational person, please try to put aside all the horrible feelings you may be having right now and focus on the evidence that lies in front of us." Plagg begged, "You felt Willem, you couldn't place the feeling because you have never felt a stone from a different set, is a little different than feeling one stone of your own miraculous set. For Marinette is the same, she felt Naomi, but if Marinette has two stone powers, the way she feels the world is stronger, and she has two creation stones, two of the most powerful on our set, that would perfectly explain why she passed out. It was too much energy for her to handle. You couldn't have prevented this,"

Adrien didn't answer. He was so tired.

It wasn't fair for Marinette, or anyone in this room, that he felt like giving up but all the emotions that had passed by his mind and took over his body in the late hours had rid him of any motivation that could help him to keep going. If Marinette had too much energy to handle, then he didn't have enough to make himself keep going.

 _But_ , he had to.

He knew pain like no one else did, he had gone through so much more than a man of his age had ever gone through. All the bad things that could happen to a person, seemed to have happened to him. Sometimes he wondered what had kept him from turning into a supervillain, with the powers that Plagg gave him, he could have easily turned out like the Papillon. What kept him from turning evil? He didn't know, but whatever it was he had to use that to motivate himself and help Marinette.

She had gone through a lot too.

"Adrien," Alya called.

Adrien rose a brow and looked at her, still avoiding Marinette.

"Can you get me some water? I think Nette is about to wake up,"

Adrien rose a brow, a more judgemental expression this time. _How could she know that?_

"Her breathing changed," Alya answered. Maybe it wasn't Plagg who read his mind, maybe his face gave away every little thought he had. "I just know her. Bring me some water,"

Adrien nodded.

He came back a minute later with a glass half-filled and a tablet of aspirins on his other hand.

Marinette was already awake and Alya was sitting right next to her. The others were as far as they could be.

Adrien stood next to the sofa and placed the glass of water in front of Alya's face so she could take it.

"Is that aspirin?" Marinette asked she leaned forward getting a better vision of Adrien's hands. Adrien nodded.

He was still holding the glass and Alya didn't seem avid to take it from his hands any time soon.

"For me?" Marinette smiled. Adrien nodded, again.

"Thank you, kitty," Marinette stood up, took the glass of water and reached for Adrien's hand. "May I get that?"

Adrien nodded, one more time.

"Cat got your tongue?" Marinette shifted her head, an amused smile drawn on her lips.

Adrien finally laughed, it was short, but it was enough for Marinette.

"Please don't make it easy for me to throw jokes around, or we will both suffer,"

"I promise I won't," He smirked. "Your aspirin,"

"Thank you, kitty," Marinette stood on the point of her feet and kissed his cheek.

Guilt threatened to make its way inside of Adrien's heart but one look at Marinette made it stop. She was the one who should be mad, she was the one who should be calling him out, but she was not doing that, maybe she really meant it, maybe he was allowed to be around her without trying to earn forgiveness. If Marinette thought he deserved, then he did.

"How bad it's your headache?" He cupped Marinette's cheek, making her look straight into his eyes.

"I've had worse, what actually bothers me is my body. You know that ache you feel all over your body when you're about to catch a cold? That's how it feels,"

"Or like a hangover," Naomi spoke from the other side of the room.

Marinette turned around and looked at the beautiful black woman smiling at her.

"I'm so sorry I haven't even said hi," Marinette clicked her tongue. Her cheeks were turning red because of the embarrassment.

She left the glass of water on the coffee table and walked towards Naomi, but Naomi lifted her hand at her, stopping her.

"No, don't come near me, we don't want you on the floor again. Let your body adapt to my energy, it won't take long but let's be cautious," Naomi smiled. "Now, let me introduce us: My name is Naomi Koole, this is my husband Willem. We're both miraculous wielders but we have stones from of another set, we hold the position you two hold in your own circle. We're here to help you, honey" _Help!_

That's what Adrien had said before she blacked out. She had been so excited because she was going to meet another miraculous wielder. Adrien and Nino didn't count, she needed someone who didn't know her, someone she could see the situation as an outsider, to help her understand. She was sure Adrien and Nino left things out to not scare her, they were still treating her like a fragile damsel in distress. This behavior didn't come from a bad place, she knew they did it because they loved her, but she was done with being treated with care, she needed to be hit with facts, even if they slapped her in Ahe face.

Also, having someone else would be beneficial. Adrien would stop being on edge because someone else would be able to explain without feeling guilty about keeping secrets, or not being able to talk about it because of past trauma.

Adrien needed to breathe, to relax and just be her friend. If things went well, maybe more.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Naomi. I'm Marinette, but you probably know everything about me already. Thank you so much for coming, I hope it didn't bother you too much,"

"Oh, sweetie. No, bother at all, it's been so long since we visited Paris. Also, I haven't seen Adrien since he was seventeen years old or so, a visit was well needed,"

Adrien huffed "We face-timed for my birthday not long ago,"

"No sense, that's not the same!" Naomi put a hand on top of her heart and took a dramatic stand.

"You're always so dramatic,"

"You're one to talk," Willem chuckled.

Marinette giggled, a hand on top of her mouth to suppress the big laugh that was about to come out.

Willem lifted a finger at Adrien before he could speak "Let's not discuss that, we have more important business to attend,"

"Yes! We should discuss what we came to discuss," Naomi nodded and took a step closer to Gabriel who had been standing in silence the whole time, "Are you alright, dear friend?"

"Yes, Naomi, thanks for asking, I just don't have much to say so I rather not waste my time engaging in useless conversation" Marinette heard Adrien's sigh. Same old Gabriel, no matter if he wasn't that bad anymore, his essence remained.

Naomi frowned and rolled her eyes, but her smile did not take long to appear again.

"Let's do this, Marinette, come close but have Adrien close to you. His energy will repel mine and it will be easier for you," Naomi ordered.

Adrien clenched his teeth. Marinette nodded vigorously.

She gave two big steps and stood right next to him, shoulders brushing. She took his hand between hers and then crossed her fingers with his. Marinette looked up and gifted him a tender smile. Adrien wasn't sure what she was saying with that single smile, it could be anything, yet it freaked him out a little. Things with Marinette were moving too fast, he understood this sudden change of attitude towards him, but it was still very surprising that Marinette wanted him this close.

It also made his heart go crazy, the beautiful girl he had always been in love with was overjoyed to share the same personal space as him and she did not look nervous about it. She was smiling, like she was sharing a secret with him.

Keeping his hand intertwined with Marinette's, and taking advantage of the second of courage he got after watching that beautiful smile, he moved behind her, crossing his free arm around Marinette's shoulders, resting his head on the crook of her neck.

Marinette closed her eyes, delighted.

"Before we start sharing our information, I would like to hear what Marinette has to say of this whole experience. How are you feeling, sweetheart?"

"Confused, but that's nothing new. I'm better than I was a few days ago, it is a lot to take in but after years of trying to keep myself in the dark, it's refreshing to gather pieces of myself. I used to think that being oblivious would help me get better but knowing and understanding what has happened to me it's a thousand times better. Also, all of you're giving me all your support, I couldn't be anything but well," Marinette gave the sincerest smile she could give, and once she got all their smiles back, she left a kiss on top of Adrien's wrist, the only one whose face she couldn't see.

"I'm glad to hear that, Marinette," Naomi stood as close as she could, then she took Willem's hand guiding her to the superhero couple "You should be tracking their energies, lovebird,"

"Please don't laugh at the nickname, I've tried my best to get rid of it but it's all been useless, so I beg you, ignore it," Willem said. He seemed more amused than angry, but Marinette didn't risk it and tried her best not to laugh. "I'm also glad to hear what you said, Marinette. I don't know how hard it is to be in your place, but I know how much pain one can carry when it comes to others. I just want to tell you that none of this is your fault, okay? No matter how things turn up, please don't ever put the blame on you, this is bigger than any of us,"

Marinette nodded, it felt like the right thing to do, but she wasn't sure she would be able to carry on with the promise he was so slightly throwing tangled in his words.

"Well, let's begin with it. The sooner we start the faster we can begin with our plan," Gabriel said. His voice was so cold compared to Naomi and Willem's that Marinette trembled a little.

"We have a plan already?" Alya asked, she stood right next to Nino, and she was looking at him, judgment filling her eyes.

"After collecting all the information, we have and our strongest theories, Willem got an idea," Nino explained.

"But it's quite dangerous," Willem raised one warning finger "So I want you to hear all the little pieces of the puzzle that I consider important and I need you to be a hundred percent sure, a hundred percent on board with it, and for that, you need to hear us out. If you decide to say no, we will not judge you, alright?"

"Alright," Marinette nodded. She felt Adrien's body stiffening. In response, she held him tighter.

"Nino, you can begin," Naomi said.

"Of course," Nino nodded. "Well, you've already seen our board, M, so you must know a lot by now, is there anything you want to ask before I explain the major points?"

"I think I know everything just fine. My biggest questions are the same as yours. Why did the kwamis forget about me? If it's true that I have a kwami or a miraculous stone inside me, how did that happen? I've read the whole board a few times, Adrien answered a whole of my questions and Alya also explained a little. I think my greatest question would be why I was such a bad liar that my parents thought I was at the States and Alya thought I was in Belgium. Or why I went looking for Chloé Bourgeois, I can't stand her."

Alya and Nino chuckled. Adrien sighed.

"I just have one explanation for that, you were desperate," Alya shrugged, "Whatever was filling your mind was more important that come up with a good lie or to avoid Chloé,"

"You know more than I thought you did," Naomi said and looked at Nino. He shrugged.

"Maybe is because we know so little," Adrien's voice was a little croaky and he didn't sound happy about his own statement.

"I think is the exact opposite, we know a lot and we can't choose a path," Naomi said, "But I have a guess. I don't want to say anything until we are a hundred percent sure, I don't want to expose us to any harm if I'm not sure,"

"I'll have to disagree," Nino said, "I think we have the answers, but we can't see them, we have what we need but we can't figure it out." Wayzz nodded by his side.

"So, what do you suggest?" Gabriel asked.

"I'll start to relate the timeline we have created, and as I do I'll answer one of the other questions you did, M. Do you have any other?"

"I don't think so," Marinette bit her lip, trying to think of something else she could ask but nothing came to mind.

"Alright, so I'll begin," Nino took a deep breath, "Adrien, I… There's something I need to say and it's… it's about Papillon,"

Marinette felt the change of pace in Adrien's breathing, the beating of his heart speeding, and his body going rigid, more than before.

Marinette looked at him, his face was still very close to her, so she left a trail of small kisses from his forehead to his cheek. After what he said in their fight, she knew a few kisses were not going to fix much, but they could make it better, more bearable, and they would let him know that she was there for him.

"I'll take it," Adrien said, voice brittle. Then, he hid his face completely, Marinette's hair falling on top of it.

Marinette saw the face of everyone in the room, they were all hurting for him. Gabriel wasn't particularly easy to read, but she swore she could see his eyes glimmering.

"I'll begin then. Please all come to the table, I'll be easier" Nino said and guided everyone to the rectangular glass table in the middle of the room. He sat in the middle and waited for everyone to sit down before he started.

Marinette and Adrien sat beside each other, Adrien was still holding her by her shoulders, and his head was still on the crook of her neck, but they weren't holding hands anymore. Instead, Marinette was playing with his hair.

"So, we begin six years ago," Nino informed and placed a calendar on the middle of the table, "Mid-July: Alya notices Marinette is acting weird, she thinks is because she misses Adrien. Marinette stops writing in her diary, she looks tired and it's out a lot." Nino looked around the table, everyone was following the details. He drew a big circle around the midweek of July and then passed the page to August.

"The first weekend of August, Marinette goes after Chloé to ask for Adrien's number, they fight. Chloé says something happens while they are arguing that makes Marinette change her mind and she cries. They have a heartfelt talk and Marinette makes Chloé promise to not say a word to Adrien. The second week of August, Marinette visits the prison…" Nino made space for a meaningful silence, a warning for what it was about to come.

Nino looked at his best friend if it was his decision he would keep this a secret from Adrien, he had seen him suffer enough already.

"Go on," Adrien encouraged.

"Marinette visits as Ladybug and she asks to talk with Papillon. The guards describe the talk as peaceful but tense, but once it's over Ladybug walks out with tears threatening to fall, on the other hand, Papillon was laughing. Two weeks later he tried to escape… he didn't make it, his plan failed and cost him his life. He died in the ambulance," Nino waited for the reactions of Marinette and Adrien, the only two who didn't know this piece of information.

Marinette opened her mouth, ready to talk but no words came out. She looked confused, frustrated, maybe even sad. By her side, Adrien's emotions were easier to read. He his was porcelain white right now, but his cheeks were bright red. He was frowning and clenching his teeth, a muscle on his jaw popped.

He was about to lose his mind right there, but he kept quiet, he didn't move.

After the long silence, Nino went back to the calendar, marking what he had just said, then he drew another circle over the last weekend of August, adding two crosses over it.

"Marinette flew to Tibet a week before this happened, but we believe that whatever happened to you didn't happen that week, but the next. Alya and I believe that Papillon was able to know what had happened to you and that was the reason he tried to escape. We can't know for sure, of course, but we think it is a strong theory to have, because it also could explain the change of energy Plagg and Wayzz felt, and Plagg stopped sensing Tikki,"

"I agree, it makes sense," Naomi said. She placed one hand on the calendar and pushed it closer to Marinette. "Is there anything you can add, sweetie?"

"I'm not sure," Marinette gasped, "I've had dreams, but I can't confirm they are memories. I see lights, and I seem to be inside of a cave, I've also heard Tikki, or who I think could be Tikki. However, I can't tell you a date, as I said I'm not even sure if they are real,"

"That's okay. Anything else?"

"No. I forget my dreams quite easily, certain things only remain because they make a huge impact on me. I usually just remember the way they make me feel. That's what haunts me the most,"

"I'm so sorry, honey," Naomi put her hand on top of her chest, where her heart was. "That was a great addition, I'm sure your dreams are real we just need to find a place for them to fit"

Marinette nodded, "You can go on, Nino,"

"Okay. I forgot to add that the day before Marinette left, was the last day Marinette, as Ladybug, texted Adrien, as Chat Noir. Now—"

"What did the text say?" Marinette interrupted

" _Being busy is part of life, chaton! I'll call you as soon as I can, stop worrying about me, okay?_ " Adrien whispered in her ear. It made her tremble, not only the words made her heart ache, but that Adrien knew them so well that he answered the question just a second after she asked.

There was no time to have a heartfelt moment, so Marinette made a sign to Nino, they had interrupted him too many times already.

"September. Alya follows clues that Marinette left for her and finds a box with instructions and the real destination she went to. Alya takes the first plane she can find and goes looking for her. It took Alya a week to find Marinette, she found her in the room of an abandoned building—

"I'm not sure how I got there, I asked everyone I encountered with for you, the only ones that knew something was a group of tourists Marinette met while camping, but they didn't know much either. I walked for hours, I left the path I was supposed to follow and walked through a desolate place. Reality stop making sense at some point and then it was was like you were calling for me. There was a tower, I can't exactly remember either, my memories are blurry, but there you were. I found you—"At the beginning, Alya had started talking like Nino had been, stating facts, but then she looked directly at Marinette and talked to her.

"I found you the second week of September, I took you to a hospital, a good one in the closest big city, your parents arrived two or three days later. We moved you to Paris, I can't remember how long it took us, but at the end of October, we were back. Then you were in a coma for a year, as you know already," Marinette nodded. Alya clicked her tongue, her emotion had disappeared from her face, now she was all business again, "Marinette woke up on the third weekend of October of the following year, she didn't remember anything. We thought Marinette remembered Adrien because she thought she studied astrophysics and the only things she could talk about, all she was interested in were subjects related to Adrien, but she never mentioned him. A few months passed, I already suspected Marinette was Ladybug, I was certain, the evidence was on her side, but I still had my doubts, I wanted to see it for myself. Fast-forward to February of the next year, when I saw Marinette turn into Ladybug for the first time."

Marinette's interest piqued. She was already intrigued by the whole conversation, there were things that she already knew but listening to it again in front of everyone was different, it helped her to understand better, to tie the story and organize her thoughts. But this is a subject she really wanted to know about.

"Marinette was mad, we were fighting because she had a date with some random guy she met on the street. He used this cliché line "you don't remember me?", you know when guys use that to get a date, well Marinette was fooled by it because she didn't remember anything, she felt bad and she accepted. So, we were screaming at each other and Marinette started breathing harshly, she was trembling and she kept quiet. The moment I knew things were about to get ugly was when her eyes turned purple. I only have seen eyes change like that when a person turned into an akuma, so I was ready to take hands on the matter, but Marinette changed into Ladybug and…" Alya bit her lip. "Ladybug was standing in front of me, but she wasn't acting like she did, her eyes were still purple, and she looked ready to kill anyone that stood in her way. Foolishly I tried to stop her, and she attacked me,"

Marinette's heart sank.

No, she couldn't have. She would never attack Alya, she was her best friend, one of the most important people in her life, she would sacrifice herself for Alya if necessary, how could she attack her?

"Don't worry, Nette, you had no idea what you were doing. When you transform you are angry and aggressive, you take it on whoever is close enough or who you consider deserves it. After you take it out of your system, or whatever force that takes over you, lets the rage go, you turn into the sweet Ladybug you always you were, and your memory, your memory is back,"

"Not completely," Adrien added. Marinette turned to him. How did he know? "We met on the rooftops, the way you talked, the way you acted, I didn't know it at that moment, but after it was revealed that you were Ladybug, I could tell you didn't remember the past six years, you didn't remember anything. Looking back, for you it was like only a few months had passed,"

"Yes, when Marinette changes into Ladybug she still thinks she is eighteen years old. One time I had to explain everything to her, she cried and screamed, begged me to look for Chat Noir to help her fix it. She changed back to Mari an hour later, for her, the conversation never happened. I waited for her to turn into Ladybug again, check if she remembered our conversation, to my disappointment every time Mari turns into Ladybug is like someone presses the reset button, she goes back to not knowing anything, to the Ladybug she was before she went missing,"

Alya pointed out the dates on the calendar, for Nino to mark.

Alya didn't have to say it but Marinette caught it from her story. She probably tried to explain the situation to Ladybug multiple times, trying to get somewhere, trying to help her, but it had been useless.

"That gives our theory more ground," Willem said, "People who were akumatized couldn't remember anything they did once they were free of the charm of the miraculous. The same happens to Marinette,"

"That doesn't explain why I lost _all_ my memories," Marinette stopped petting Adrien, leaning on the table to be closer to Willem and the calendar.

"I don't think your memory loss is related to the butterfly miraculous. That remains an enigma,"

Marinette sighed. She pressed her face against her hand and pouted. She heard a giggle, then Adrien pressed his lips against her cheek.

"It's not funny, _minou_ ," Marinette pouted once again.

"I know, I'm sorry, you just looked cute and I couldn't resist." Adrien looked ashamed.

"It's okay," Marinette smiled at him, assuring him she wasn't hurt by it.

"Can I ask what Adrien was doing all this time?" Naomi wondered. "We have no information of you, baby boy"

"I was at school, not doing much," Adrien answered, "I tried to contact Ladybug many, many times and then I gave up. I was hurting, I thought Ladybug didn't want me anymore, so I focused on school, on partying, living my university life at its fullest. Once I finished I looked back for a job here in Paris so I could look for her. I was _extremely useless_ during this time," Well, guilt wasn't that easy to get rid of, was it?

"Don't say that!" Alya, Nino, and Marinette said at the unison.

"I wasn't doing much either, Adrien," Nino said, "I knew Ladybug had disappeared and still took my time with my training, I could have put more of me, but I did not,"

"And I let Marinette convince me to keep everything a secret, I could have pushed harder. I could have told things to Nathanael and make him help me, I know he would have because he always wanted the best for Mari, if I could have convinced him this was it, then Marinette wouldn't have been in the dark and maybe we would already have fixed it,"

"Stop!" Marinette stood up, so fast that Adrien fell back. "None of you are useless, none of you did anything wrong! You did what you thought was best at the moment. All you're saying are big "what ifs" you think it could have worked differently but that's not true, things could have ended just the same. These two days I've been thinking I am useless too, but I've realized that I'm wrong. We are trying to fix this, we are putting our hearts on this investigation, we are trying to make things right now and that's enough. Enough!"

"Marinette…

"We are only looking at the past because we are trying to figure it out what step to take in the future, we have to stop feeling sorry for ourselves and we have to focus on what's ahead of us, we will be okay, we are together now, and we will be together after this, so please, stop,"

"You really are Ladybug, aren't you?" Naomi smirked.

"I guess so," Marinette shrugged, a proud smile crossed her face. She felt happy. "Let's continue with this timeline, I don't want us to be all night here just recalling events, we need to take a step further,"

"Your word is my command," Nino winked, he looked more alive now. He was always calmed, but seeing him now, Marinette could make the difference between the times when he really was relaxed and the times he faked it.

"Nothing major, besides Marinette's sudden transformations, happened in this period of time. Marinette regained memories and got flashbacks when objects or people triggered them, Marinette studied, dated, made a new life and nothing weird happen. Now we move on two-three years ago, we don't know if it's related to Mari but we rather say it: Wayzz and I felt a flute of energy, it was odd, eerie, we couldn't resolve this mystery, but we dare to say that it was a different energy than the one in our stones, but not unrelated, it's somehow connected to us, we don't know how but it is,"

"Since Tikki is the kwami of creation she has some powers that us could dream to have. We think Tikki might have felt it first, years before, and that she and Marinette were trying to solve the mystery, and that could have guided them to the great unknown that is your trip and disappearance, Ladybug,"

"It makes sense, let's keep it in mind!" Willem said excitedly.

"We will, we remembered this just tonight, so we will look for all the investigations we did later on," Wayzz bowed to the man.

"Back at Nettte, nothing changed until April of this year, Marinette started running through the rooftops of Paris as our well-known vigilante," Marinette's cheeks burned. Adrien had already told her that they knew, somehow it was still embarrassing. "Did you remember something that made you take that decision?"

"Not really," Marinette sighed, "One night, I woke up on a rooftop, I had no idea how I made it there but instead of being terrified I felt… at home? It was the most relaxed I have felt in years, I felt like I belonged there, so I started climbing and spending time looking at the city from above. Weeks passed, and I would only sit there and listen to music or eat, but one day it was different, I was looking down and I witnessed a robbery, my blood boiled, a part of me knew I had to do something so I did. I went after the thief, I fought -muscle memory, I guess- I won, I gave the man back his bag. I felt so alive, it felt so right that I started doing it more than I was doing it on regular basis, I would climb every night and look for people in trouble. For a long time, I had been missing something, never knew what it was but the time I spent being vigilante made those thoughts quiet," Marinette shrugged.

"Well, that explains a lot, little lady," Alya nudged at her, "I wish you could have told me, I wouldn't have stopped you, I promise. You can trust me with anything, I know you do with almost everything, but those things also count, just so you know,"

"I trust you, but that was mine to have, I didn't want to share it with anyone. And you knew either way," Marinette sighed.

They exchanged a meaningful look for a few seconds. After all, this was done, after they managed to fix this situation and leave it all behind she was going to have a conversation with Alya, there were many things that they needed to tell each other, but now it wasn't the time for it.

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she missed a few words from Nino, thankfully she didn't miss much and was able to follow up with the timeline just fine.

"Then Adrien is back in town, they are neighbors, Marinette's dreams start to get stranger, she feels on edge most of the time," He points at the calendar, marks the months Adrien and Marinette have met each other "Chat Noir and Marinette start to spend more time together, which explains why things started to get even louder and stronger for her. We are not going to pinpoint all the stuff that has happened here because everything takes us to the same place." Nino swapped the pages until he got to October, the present month.

"This week," Adrien took the calendar, and pointed out at the week they were at "Marinette turns into Ladybug for the first time in front of me. Marinette and I are closer because of the party. Marinette remembers me after we drive to work in my car. Marinette freaks out at the office, almost losing control and turning into Ladybug again. Finally, Marinette decides to read her diaries and founds out that I'm Chat Noir,"

"And here we are," Marinette sighed.

There was nothing else to tell. Nothing relevant to the mission at least, the things that had happened between her and Adrien were a private matter.

"And here we are," Adrien copied.

"Yes, and with our context already laid out" Naomi stood up and walked towards Marinette, she sat by her side and took her hands, "Marinette, all of us are almost certain that you have Nooroo inside of you. You asked how this could happen, well kwamis are supposed to do anything to protect their stones but there's a limit to it, the wielder of the stone must help them too. Your stone, the ladybug stone, is a stone of creation and so is the butterfly. We don't know what you were doing with the butterfly, but it's never a good idea to use two creation stones together, it can be unbearable. We try to avoid it as much as we can, to use such similar energies. I don't know if this played a number on you, but it could be why Nooroo reacted as he did and got stuck inside of you. My other theory is that he looked for the strongest energy of creation in the place and hid. Alya told us that she found you bleeding, with bruises, as if someone attacked you, so we assume you were attacked, by someone or something. This could have made Nooroo take desperate measures. But we won't know for sure unless you remember, or we talk to Nooroo,"

Marinette was expecting a speech of sorts, but she didn't it expect it that soon.

Naomi was quite direct.

Just as she needed.

"But none of those things are happening any time soon," Marinette sighed.

"One could," Naomi said. Marinette's eyes lighted up.

Yes, Naomi was exactly what she needed, most definitely.

"You know how to take him out," Marinette couldn't hide her excitement. Her whole face was glowing, her smile went from ear to ear and her hands were on fists that she was shaking in front of her face with joy.

"We are not a hundred percent sure it is going to work, but I would put my money on it and say is our best shot,"

"Then let's do it!" Marinette clapped "How do we take it out?"

"Marinette…" Both Adrien and Alya said in a warning

"We think Adrien could take Nooroo out," Willem said.

"Me? How?" Adrien didn't sound interested, he sounded scared and that made Marinette nervous.

"We need your cataclysm, a variation of it," Willem explained, "As the raven, I have very similar powers to you, they all revolve around destruction, but I can manage to break or bend without destroying, this is what is all about, I can teach you"

"Break or bend? We are talking about something that's inside of Marinette's body, there's no option to break or bend, here,"

"He probably didn't mean that Adrien, just…"

"No, no I know my powers, maybe not all of them but I bet he meant that. Didn't you, Willem?" Adrien rose a brow.

"It's complex, but the last thing we want to do is hurt Marinette," Willem fixed his shirt's collar "It won't be easy, but we can use your claws to break the magical barrier that's protecting Nooroo, and only a stone of destruction can do that,"

"I'm not an expert but that sounds dangerous," Alya blurted, a bit angry.

"I agree," Adrien's voice broke at the middle of his words.

"You guys," Marinette sulked.

"We have a full plan for this, we are not just telling Adrien to scratch Marinette," Naomi said, "Some time ago, we had to do something similar, we had to break through a magical barrier, and Willem succeeded. We did not break a barrier inside of a human, that's new and it's a reason to worry, but we have been successful before, this is just a twist,"

"Yeah, I bet there is no difference!" Marinette said. She did not look at Alya or Adrien, she had a feeling that she wasn't going to like the look on their faces.

"We have done our research, it's as safe as it can be. I can't confirm Marinette won't feel any pain, and it's dangerous b-" Willem started but was interrupted by his wife.

"You're not giving them reasons to trust us, my lovebird," Naomi sighed, "We know this can be dangerous, but you have not been strangers to danger, not since you took the role as superheroes of Paris,"

"She is kinda right," Nino giggled. Marinette didn't have to look to know that he was smiling at Alya and that she was glaring back at him.

"We are going to take all the measures to make it easier, to make it safe. Marinette must be almost numb, but not under anesthesia, that is not natural and we don't have control over it, none of us is a doctor and even them can mess up, so, we need to fill a bathtub with ice and we will naturally numb Marinette's body, she will also be sleepy but not completely unconscious, we need to do this at the perfect moment. Nino has healing powers so he should be present too, he will keep Marinette's heart rate up and will help to ease the pain if needed,"

"Does that sound right, Marinette?" Willem asked, voice trembling a little. Adrien was younger and had less experience than him but he was looking quite intimidating at the moment.

"Yes, it is, and I know Adrien will do amazing, I trust him, he can manage cataclysm,"

"I know how to use cataclysm, but I have never done something like this before. What is the risk of it going wrong? It's dangerous I'm not happy with that but you're right, we have faced danger. Still, I need to know what is at risk"

"Well," Naomi clicked her tongue.

" _Well?_ " Adrien repeated,

"Well," Willem clicked his tongue too, "If not done properly, we thought that the worst scenarios could be Marinette suffering psychological damage, go comatose again or…

"Or?" Adrien said between clenched teeth.

"Die," Gabriel said, voice dead.

Marinette heard Adrien's teeth chirping.

"No,"

"Adrien, those are the worst case scenarios! It's only a supposition,"

"Oh no, I'm not doing it, I'm not risking it. We can live without knowing, it's fine, we'll wait until Mari remembers," Adrien did a sad version of jazz hands.

"There's no time for that, Adrien!"

"There's time for it if that means we keep you alive!"

"I won't die. Willem will instruct you properly, you'll do a wonderful job, I'll be fine, and we'll get Nooroo,"

"And what happens if Nooroo is not there? What happens if I fuck up? I'm not risking it, I'm not risking _you_ ,"

"Nooroo is in there, there's no way he is not, and you won't fuck up. You won't fuck up because this is about me, you'll keep me safe. I trust you and your powers. We can do this, Adrien,"

"Marinette, you could die! _Die!_ Can that clever mind of yours process that little detail? _DIE!_ "

"I know! But if I do –but I won't- you'll bring me back," Marinette then whispered, just for him to hear "I brought you back, right?" She had deduced just as much after their fight. He could do it too, he was powerful enough to do it, of that she was sure.

"How am I supposed to do that? Are you crazy? This is not how it works, I'm not you!"

"We need to do this! I need to do this, please help me, I can't do this without you!"

"Marinette don't ask me to do this, please I beg you," He shut down his eyes, trying to avoid her, "I won't be the one to kill you,"

"You won't kill me, you think I would let you?"

"I would let you kill me," Adrien whispered, "I would let you do anything, I would put my life at risk for you… but I won't let you do the same,"

"Oh no, no, no, no, no" Marinette shook her head, "You can't say those things and then just… don't be a hypocrite!"

"I'll be whatever I want if that means to keep you save. End of discussion,"

"I'll do it anyways then," Marinette breath heavily.

"How may I ask?"

"I'll ask Willem." She stood straight, head high, long neck and a condescending smirk on her face. "You can do it, right? You have the same powers as Chat Noir, and you said you've done it before," She said this as she turned to him.

"I only would use me as your last resource, Marinette. Adrien is your safer option, but I'll do it if you really need me to,"

"No," Adrien pointed at Willem, "I won't let you. I'll knock her out and every single one of you if—

"Adrien," Marinette pushed him, "Please. You are my safest option, I want you to do it, please, _pleaaaaaase_. We have to do it, and if you stop me if you try to…. I don't want to obligate you, I really don't want you because I can tell you're hurting, but there's no other choice! I want you to take him out, I trust you with my life, Adrien Agreste. I want to do this with you, but if you don't, I promise you I'll do it anyway, so please do it with me,"

"You don't want to obligate me, but you give that speech. That is manipulation, princess,"

"Maybe we could talk about this tomorrow morning," Naomi interfered. "I said this was a fragile subject, so let's go to sleep, we should think about it. We should not let our intense emotions overwhelm us, it takes away the best of us.

"Nothing is going to change overnight, because we are not putting Marinette's life on the line and that's the last word." Adrien whirled on his ankles and did not look back. He left the room and with his departure, the silence became king of the room.

No one was able to speak a word, they were communicating only through looks and body movements.

Marinette could see that no one was surprised by Adrien's behavior, they seemed to be expecting it. Well, she was not. She was expecting for her partner to be a little more professional and put his emotions aside. Okay, no, that was a lie, that was how she wished things were between them at these kinds of situations, but she was aware that things with Adrien were never going to be that way. Nonetheless, she wasn't expecting to lash out like he did, she was expecting more compassion from him, she expected that he had present what a great team they were and because of that, they were always triumphant.

"I'll talk to him," Marinette said "We'll figure it out,"

"Don't try to coax him, Marinette," Gabriel said, heat all over his voice, "Be fair with him,"

There were a thousand words unsaid, Marinette could tell that Gabriel wanted to continue, why she didn't was a mystery. He was a hard man to read, she always said that but tonight he had let his walls down, it was undeniable that he was irritated and angry.

Marinette nodded in agreement. She knew she was lying when she did it, and it hurt, but she pulled the best poker face she could do and she left the room without saying anything else.

She had to coax him, there was no other way that Adrien would accept, he had lost enough already, he was protecting himself, she knew it. But he was being selfish, no matter how much she understood his position, she had to be selfish too.

 **xx**

Marinette walked without direction for a few minutes, this house was massive and she didn't remember being here before. She opened every door that she thought could be a bedroom until she found the one where Adrien was hiding.

He was in front of big rectangular windows at the end of the room. The moonlight was striking his face. He looked celestial. The light did wonders to the color of his skin and made his eyes glimmer like emeralds. Or maybe she was too drunk in the vision of him that she was hallucinating.

Whatever it was, he was beautiful.

And now being selfish felt harder than it had been before.

 _But_ , she had to.

She didn't take her time, she went straight to the point.

"I need you to do this for me, Adrien,"

" **No** ," His words cut like knives through the tension of the room, "Marinette I can't do it. I won't' be the one to execute you,"

"If you let Willem do it you may as well be," He turned around to her, and that look on his face, oh, Marinette's heart stopped at the sight of it. She regretted the words immediately "You're my safest option,"

"No, your safest option is to wait. You'll remember, princess,"

"No, I won't. I need something to trigger memories, we could spend the rest of our lives trying to find the right trigger. Don't you think we have waited enough?"

"For you, I would wait forever, Marinette,"

It wasn't fair, he could not come at her with those words, he could not come at her with his husky intense voice and his profound eyes, eyes that held the universe and every answer she wanted to search for. He couldn't clap back using his emotions, using the love they had, because that meant she had to use them too.

She took a big breath. The last two days her mind had scrambled all her memories, but the feelings running through her had been in order for the first time after years of clashing and hiding. It was sudden, she had only remembered him this week, she had only discovered he was her partner two days ago, but she was certain.

And this was her moment to say everything she was holding back.

She wasn't going to be fair, but he had to listen to her. She needed to remember so she could get better, she needed to remember so she could have him, she needed to be herself again, not only fix her own life but help him with his. They needed to be a team again and if that meant he had to manipulate him a little, then she was going to do it.

He could hate her later, he could take all the time to forgive her once he realized what she had done but she was going to take the risk.

Adrien didn't use his emotions as weapons on propose, it was who he was. Marinette was impulsive but when it came to battle she could be cold and calculating, letting go and permit her feelings to take over her was a cruel move, especially when she used it against Adrien.

But, there was nothing else left to do.

"I love you," Marinette blurted. The world seemed to stop at that second. She had said it before, but the passion, the desperation that wrapped the words was so new, so intense, it made them anxious.

"I love you so, soooo much, it consumes me. I've been trying to put together the pieces for so long because I had no memories of you but... " She hugged herself "I love you because of the old memories we share together, it doesn't matter that I don't have all of them, I love you thanks to them. I love you because the new memories we created fill my heart with so much joy. Because the way you make me feel it's the most pleasant feeling in the world. You change the world around me, you make it faster and then slower, and you turn the blandest experiences into a firework show, Adrien. Every detail of you makes my head spin around, I love you more and more every second that passes by, I love you more every time I see something new in you, and when I see something familiar too. But, I want to love you more. My heart is ready to give every little piece of it to you. So. let. me,"

Marinette took long steps, further, in his direction, but he was still far from her.

"Let me love you at my fullest, let me remember you and give you all the love you deserve and all the love I want to give to you. And if you love me just as much as I love you, let me love myself too, let me find who I was and who I was supposed to be, and after that, when I become one with myself again, let me love you a little more," Marinette couldn't tell if she was rambling or her words were finding a way to come across, it didn't matter, once she opened her mouth she couldn't stop. Neither could the tears that were streaming down her cheeks. "And if you love me, then love yourself too. Let yourself try again, stop avoiding the obstacles that appear in your way and fight. You're the bravest person I know, you're Chat Noir for god's sake! You're the bravest person in the world! I know you think that man doesn't exist anymore, that reckless boy that put his heart out and fought with all he had, but he does. I see him." Marinette stuttered a little, "You're, you're, scared, you're traumatized but running away won't help. So, love yourself, and let me love you and let's… let's… find a way," Marinette swallowed, "Let's heal together, Adrien."

"I…" Adrien's body felt heavy. His lip hurt and was starting to bleed, he had been biting it as Marinette spoke but he hadn't realized until the moment he felt the metallic taste on his tongue.

What was he supposed to say after that?

Marinette had spilled her heart and soul for him to hear. He couldn't compete with that, no words could be enough to express all the love he felt for her.

His love for her consumed him too.

She was a bright flame in the dark and he was the lost traveler who needed to find his way back home. She was warmth, truth, and safety. She was the meaning of love. Romantically or platonically, it didn't matter, he could have her either way and that was the love he was going to take and cherish until the day he passed away.

 _Let's heal together, Adrien._

He wanted that. It's what he had wanted for years but had been frightened to ask, he didn't want to look weak, not after dying in front of her, not after leaving her unprotected, not after she brought him back and he felt how she was feeling. Not after he knew how hollow a person could feel after losing a loved one.

To this day, he didn't know how Ladybug had brought him back, but he had felt everything she felt when he was making his way back. He had experimented first hand every emotion, every thought, every heartache she had been feeling.

He promised he would never let her feel that way again, he was going to prioritize her happiness, and that meant acting like everything was jolly. He hid his trauma so well, but at the end, it found his way out, it racked him.

If she died, by his hands no less, he wasn't going to make it through.

He was afraid, he was traumatized, she said it herself. He couldn't heal.

But oh, how much he wanted to.

Marinette's words echoed in his mind. Words she had said only minutes before, same words she had said for years too.

She trusted him. She trusted him and his powers. She proved it multiple times, on reiterated occasions.

And he trusted her.

And he loved her.

And he wanted her to be happy, he wanted to love her properly, he wanted her to love him too.

 _Let's heal together, Adrien._ If she said it she meant it, she trusted that he could heal, she trusted him to help her heal too.

He didn't like this situation but right now it was crystal clear.

Saying the words burned his throat like strong bourbon, no that fell short, it was like acid.

"I'll do it,"


	27. author's note

A long chapter because I made you guys wait too long this time. It's been a great year at uni but it was also exhausting so I took my time and wrote other stuff, but here we are again. Couldn't leave my baby behind jaja.  
I'm excited about the next chapter, it's been on my mind for so long and it was the idea that changed all the course of this fic, because this was supposed to be sort of a chick flick but suddenly I had this idea and boom! a whole new plot and this story as it is now was born, and I love it.  
I don't think this story will surpass the 35 chapters, at least that's my estimation, maybe it could be less. All depends on the things I have left to explain, I'm trying my best to not leave ANY plot holes, it's been harder than I thought it was going to be lol.  
Anyways, thank you so much for reading my story, in this time I've been gone we reached 1000+ kudos, I can't tell you how much it means to me, I started this story because I wanted to write something, it was the first time I committed to a fanfic after years of not writing in fandom so, and my english and storytelling has come along way, i think you guys can tell too so, thank you from the bottom of my heart!  
All the love, see ya next time x  
tumblr: peterkavnsky  
twitter: spriinqday  
i have a discord too i have no idea how to link that lol, but if you prefer that instead of tumblr i can figure it out a way to send a link, and you can talk to me there


	28. Ten Below Zero

CHAPTER 27: BALANCE

 **PART 1**

It was raining.

The French capital skies were painted in dark grey colors, the sunlight was trying to find the best corner to leak through and the rain was pouring softly.

Nothing to get worked up about, a typical day in Paris.

Rain made rooftops slippery and it was harder to see where you were going, but it made the experience of running through them much more entertaining.

They had had an amazingly good weather for the past months, good weather considering this was Paris, and every time it had started pouring, Chat Noir had been with Marinette, who's "superhero costume" was basically gym attire, so he had swiftly taken her back to her apartment every time.

Finally, he could enjoy the pleasure of running in the rain, jumping from one building to another, land on the street and help people who were about to get wet by cars, or who couldn't take their groceries and their umbrellas at the same time.

After two hours and three rounds around the city, he was sitting on top of a building on the Latin Quarter, close to his home and Marinette's, watching Notre Dame in the distance.

His hair was wet and was starting to stick to the back of his neck, it made it itch. He tried his best to make a bun but his hair was too heavy because of the rain, so it hung too low. However, it was better than nothing. Maybe Marinette would have to cut his hair a bit more.

The feeling that took over him was unpleasant. He wished he could go back to those days when it was only Marinette and Chat Noir. There were lies between them and he held back his feelings for her, but on the bright side, he wasn't about to kill her. She was safe.

He shouldn't have accepted, no matter how tempting it was, to heal together, to be with her, to be loved by her and give that love back. He should have put her safety above everything, even if that meant that she was going to hate him. But the way she spoke, the passion on her voice, the shimmer in her eyes, the hidden promises she was giving to him. He was overwhelmed, he still couldn't erase the words, they were circling on his mind, echoing one time after another they were played on his head.

 _Love,_

 _love,_

 _love,_

 _love._

How much had the meaning of the word changed? It felt like it had been years, but it had been only forty-eight hours, and before that only a few more days. Marinette's world had changed and she was changing his world too with her declarations.

This is what he had always wanted. The intense and ardent love she was promising him was the best gift he could ever ask but the timing was wrong.

"Ugh," He growled. He leaned back and pressed his back to the wall of pipes. He barely felt the cold through his suit, it was comforting nevertheless.

He played with his tail and tried to keep his mind away from all his problems. If he could clear his mind for thirty seconds he would call it a successful day.

He remembered a meditation technique one of his therapists had recommended him, and begun the first step. He concentrated on the rhythm of his breath, on how his body felt, he closed his eyes and-

"Adrien," The sound of his name was accompanied with the sound of boots stepping in the wet tiles.

Adrien growled.

 _Thirty seconds_ , he hadn't asked for much, he hadn't been too ambitious, and it was still ruined.

"What?" He rose a brow, he didn't open his eyes.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you but we think is time for you to start practicing,"

"Can't it wait? I'm busy,"  
"My apologies, I really don't want to push you, but we have to. Marinette has given us two days to prepare,"

Eyes wide open in surprise, Adrien looked at Willem. "She lost her mind! This girl has no common sense, why aren't you guys stopping her?"

"If you can't stop her I doubt we'll be able to do it," Willem sat next to him, "And, I believe you can do this Adrien. I've studied your technique and how you move and take decisions when you're fighting. You're excellent, if there is someone who can do this, is you"

"You're just trying to persuade me," Adrien looked Willem from head to toe, finally taking a good look at the superhero in front of him.

Willem's suit was simple and didn't resemble much of a raven, but you couldn't confuse it with another animal either. It was all black, except at the sides of his ribs and under his arms, where the color was lighter and a few streaks of dark blue contrasted against the black. He could see what looked like feathers on his shoulders and his back.

He had gloves and claws too, not as thick as his and a little longer. Willem's mask was grey and it was thinner and sharper than he was, it followed the shape of his nose and eyes, it fell in a straight line to his sideburns.

"Cool suit," Adrien said, actually impressed with it. It was the first time he saw another superhero with his same colors.

Willem laughed "Thank you, yours is too, kiddo. But it has changed, hasn't it? I remember you had a bell when you were younger,"

"Uh, yeah. It has had minimal changes through the years, the bell disappeared only a week ago. Mari hasn't noticed," It wasn't necessary to add the last part, but he always found himself including Marinette in his conversations, irrelevant or not, he found a way.

"She's stressed too," Willem put a hand over his shoulder, "She is impulsive, I can tell, I've studied her moves too and after meeting her it's obvious, _but_ she is smart and strategical. She gave you two days, it means she is certain that you can do this in two days. I trust her judgment,"

"Controlling cataclysm is not easy. I don't know what or how your powers are, Willem, but any derivation of cataclysm has been a hassle, and I've never dared to use cataclysm in a human being. It terrifies me,"

"My power is just like cataclysm, but I don't use my claws. I have a bow, serves as normal bow and when I need it to, carries my power," He explained, "I understand you're afraid, I was too when I had to it, and there was less at stake, but it's not as hard as it sounds, it's all on our minds. We have more control over our powers than the one we believe we have,"

"My mind is not the most reliable source of control, sorry to disappoint,"

"After all you've been through I don't expect you to be the most serene and healthy person in the world, Adrien. Naomi and I planned to come earlier and help you out, but we didn't want to do anything you didn't' want to, and you hadn't revealed the secret, not even to Gabriel so we took a step back every time. But you have something going on for you that no one can take away,"

"And what's that?"

"Your emotions are really strong, you are an emotional being. You may see that as weakness, but is a strength when you know how to use it," He squeezed his shoulder, "You love Marinette, it's all the strength you need. You won't let her die because you love her, you'll put all of you on doing this right and to defy any difficulty. Your emotions will make bloom the best of you, they'll make you strong. Your love for her will be your biggest ally,"

Adrien snorted, "That's so corny, Willem,"

"But is true," Willem rose a brow.

Adrien sighed. Yes, it was true.

"So, what do I need to do?" Adrien asked.

"Oh, no much, it's all concentration, we just need a vast space and Nino has already managed to find a place, so we just have to go,"

 **xx**

Alya watched Nino transform three times, after requesting it multiple times, he only accepted three times. She needed one more, but she could see he was not in the mood. She still couldn't believe how easy it was, how he changed and yet still remained the same.

"I want one too," She said, taking the shield from his back. Nino had stayed in the suit because they were waiting for Adrien and Willem to start training, and now she was studying the details of the suit.

"Why would you want a shield?" He asked.

"Not a shield, I want a magic weapon, I want a miraculous," She explained, "It's unfair that I'm the one who has been obsessed with superheroes since I was a kid and I'm the only one from my group of friends that doesn't have one. I'm a sidekick. A sidekick! This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me," She bit her tongue, "Well, not the worst, it's obvious that I've had worse.. ugh, is still up there,"

"I'm sorry," Nino smiled at her, "If it makes you feel better when Wayzz introduced himself I told him he got the wrong person and that I knew someone who could do a better job than I ever would. I was talking about you,"

Alya's eyes glowed. "Really?!" She asked excitedly.

"Yes," He nodded, "But Wayzz said that I was the chosen one and that I couldn't send him to you. I accepted but I still think you would be a better turtle than I am,"

"Don't say that, you're pretty great," Alya kissed his cheek, "Also, I don't think green it's my color," Nino chuckled. "And I'm a cool sidekick, right? Like Batman's Oracle,"

"You're not a sidekick, 'Lya, you're your own team and you're the strongest of us because guess what? You don't have any magic jewelry but you're courageous and smart and use that to win. You're the best of all of us,"

"You're a liar," Alya whispered. She looked away so he wouldn't see her blushing. "So, what's Adrien supposed to do here?"

" _Not break the ice,_ " Nino said, "I'll use my water powers to do circles of ice. He needs to use cataclysm and go through them but not break them, if he manages to canalize his energy only in the points where his claws are and not let them spread then he can do the same to Mari. Willem says he practiced like this too. It's also practice for me, I'm gonna be beside Marinette all the time, controlling the ice and the temperature but also her vital signs, I need to know the exact moment when she is on the edge," Nino swallowed.

"Are you okay with this, Nino?" Alya rose a brow. "I know you think you don't have a chance, but you do. I can try to convince Marinette, maybe some grams of reason are going through her brain now that she has slept,"

"Is the only way, Alya. Marinette is the only one of us who is been actually using her logic. This needs to be done, this is bigger than Marinette. I mean, I also want to do it to help Marinette but-

"What are you hiding?" Alya asked. "There's something you have not told us, right?"

"Yes," He admitted. That was easy that she thought it was going to be.

"Whatever it is why would you not tell us?" Alya took a step closer to him so she would be able to whisper in case that Adrien and Willem appeared out of nowhere. "What's bigger than Marinette and Tikki?"  
"We did not completely lie, we just considered that it would be better to talk about it later on. Marinette can give us valuable information and we don't want to muddle the situation more than already is,"

"You need Marinette's, no, Ladybug's memory back," Alya inquired. Nino nodded. "This is the reason why you came back to Paris?" Nino nodded again.

Alya's heart sank.

"I did not know Marinette was Ladybug, it was not personal, just business," Nino sighed, "I did know Adrien was Chat Noir but I couldn't bring him to this, I had to do it by myself,"

"You're not by yourself now," Alya hugged him, she pressed her head against his chest, "You can trust me, maybe I can help,"

"Maybe you can," He chuckled, "It's dangerous, for us, miraculous holders. See? Not so great, nothing for you to be jealous about," Alya giggled. Nino kissed the top of her head.

"Tell me. I won't tell a soul,"

"No one, Alya. If the time doesn't come, then you're taking this to the grave, alright?"

"I swear I'll keep it a secret,"

Nino sighed. He backed away from Alya and looked around them. No sign of Adrien or Willem.

"I'll make it as simple as possible," Nino started, "In this world, in the universe, everything has a side part, an opposite. For things to be created they have to not exist first, and for things to be destroyed they have to be created before. Scientists also talk about things like that in space, matter, and antimatter,"  
"Yes, I've heard of that," Alya nodded.

"Our stones' powers are based on these opposites, on the balance they create. But, in every set, there are only two stones that are complete opposites. It's really hard in nature to find something pure, something that's its total being, one characteristic being all of it, not a mix of many. Nature is not black or white, there are grey areas, and that's why these pure elements are so rare. That's why we have only two pure stones for every set,"

"And they balance each other," Alya said, to assure she was understanding this right.

"Yes," Nino played with the bracelet on his wrist, "But as pure as they are they were not at the beginning. These two stones were one at the beginning, they separated later on," Nino clicked his tongue.

"But then they would be a completely different energy and they would be one energy, they wouldn't have an opposite to balance, right?" Alya said. That would make sense. If they were pure when they were divided then they were not when they were together, but they would still be extremely powerful, right? The energy inside the stone would need to find balance.

"Yes," Nino took a deep breathe, "There are legends and notes on top of books I've read that wonder about the balancing energy. Wayzz is younger than Tikki and Plagg but he's been around for almost as long, yet he doesn't know anything about it, but he believes that sort of energy has to exist,"

"It makes sense," Alya touched her lips when her index finger, a motion she did whenever she was deep lost in a thought, "Wait, when they are together, is the stone more leaned to its creation side or the destruction side? And why are you so worried about this? It has to exist, for balance to exist, why are you so afraid?"

"It leans towards creation," Nino said, "And I'm worried because they are two stones that balance each other, not one, that means there is a destructive force on the universe, on Earth, that's unbalanced and that only means trouble,"

"It does sound troublesome," Alya admitted, "But nothing awful has happened, right?"

"Alya, if my theories are right then this energy takes time to recharge but when it does is lethal. It's destruction. The black plague, the witch hunt, two world wars, just to say a few tragedies of this world,"

"Oh,"  
"And to recharge, it needs a tremendous amount of energy. Where it finds it? Miraculous holders,"

Alya gasped, "You think if this stone-energy-whatever exist, that it tried to use Marinette's energy?"

"Yes. Marinette has the strongest energy of our set. And she is not the only one who has disappeared. I've been recollecting records, not only of our set, all around the world. The strongest person on the set has been missing most of the time, almost all of them had disappeared from the face of Earth, Alya,"

"But, Marinette is still here? I found her, she came back," Alya pulled her hair.

"Exactly! It doesn't make sense, that's why she is the only clue, that's why we need to do this. Marinette may be safe for now, but she is still the strongest of us, I would say she is the strongest of all the sets, Alya. I've met with other leaders and wielders while doing the investigation, and after meeting Willem and Naomi I can tell that she is the strongest energy I've felt. If I'm right, then she managed to escape, and Alya in the way you describe it, she barely did. I don't think she is safe and if she is not safe then no one else is. And whatever Marinette did to escape, to be here, I don't think it changed much, she is just far from it, but I have this, I don't know, I just don't think it's over for her,"

"Nino…" Alya bit her lip, not sure how to proceed.

"Tell me, don't keep it,"

"You need to tell them,"

"I'm gonna tell Marinette, once we manage to bring her memory back,"

"We are not sure if this procedure is going to work, Nino. You can't put all your cards there,"  
"It' the only choice, Alya," Nino rubbed his temples, "There are no clues that connect to give us anything clear, Marinette is the only thing that can give this theory a solid ground. I won't scare my pack or my friends if I don't have proof,"

"You mean you won't tell Adrien," Alya crossed her arms in front of her chest, "You're worried about Adrien,"

"Of course I worry about Adrien, but this has nothing to do with him,"  
"Oh, don't lie to me! It's all over your face, Adrien is what is stopping you, you're scared of how he is going to react,"

"Alya, you-

"Stop lying, you are already telling me everything, now just tell me why you're not telling Adrien!"

"Oh, saints, you're insufferable," Nino rolled his head. "Why am I in love with you?"

"I have the same question," Alya frowned, "But we are not talking about that. Tell me,"

Nino sighed. There was nothing he could do, he had reached a point of no return.

"You know Adrien's mom disappeared?

"Do I know if- of course, I know! who doesn't know about- _oh?_ _Oh!_ Oh my god!," Nino covered her mouth with his hands, she shoved it away "Her too?" She whispered this time.

"It's an assumption, but Wayzz said she was the one with the strongest energy of her pack," Nino said, "So if I'm right, Adrien did not only lose his mother to this energy, he could also lose Marinette, he almost did. There is too much going on right now, I can't put more weight on his back,"

"You need to stop treating him like a baby, he could be stronger than you think,"

"He is strong but, Alya, I know my friend, he hasn't been the same after defeating Papillon. He is sensible and he carries the destruction stone. He might not notice but the cat miraculous drains him, it's hard not to be consumed by destruction. Plagg chose well because Adrien has been able to remain good but now he is mentally ill, he is on the edge and anything could throw him off balance. I'm being cautious and Plagg agrees with me,"

"You've talked to Plagg?" Alya's tone lowered, she wasn't mad anymore, she understood.

"Yes, of course," Nino twirled on his heel, "Our conversation ends here, I can hear them approaching. It's training time."

 **xx**

Marinette stared at the computer screen. A knot tangled on her stomach.

He was right. Not that she didn't believe him, but Adrien could be a bit exaggerated and make things seem bigger than they actually were. But he was right this time, completely spot on.

Marinette scrolled down again, reading all the information on the medical website, every word remained the same, the same words that she had read five times before.

She groaned. She pressed her cheek against the cold desk and looked up at the big screens. She was naïve, no, she was stupid. Those moments of courage were long gone and now she was looking at the situation as it was.

She could die.

That clever mind of hers, as Adrien had called it, was finally recognizing the words and her brain was wrapping herself around the idea that if things went wrong she could meet her end.

Marinette turned around, checking if Adrien was back yet.

The bed and the couch were empty and the door wasn't open, so he was still outside. It didn't feel good, being in his room when he wasn't here. He should be here, with her. But he was mad, she could tell.

He agreed to break the barrier, to put her life in danger, but he wasn't going to do it with a smile on his face, he had already warned her of it and he hadn't need to say any words.

Last night, when they both were too tired to keep staring at each other waiting for the other to say something after the heated conversation they had just had, they fell into his bed and slept. She couldn't say they slept together, Adrien put pillows in the middle of the bed and he stayed as close to the edge as he could.

It hurt. He wasn't being respectful, a gentleman, too shy, whatever excuse you could try to label it, he was angry and he didn't want to be close to her.

Marinette felt wrong. She wanted to take it all back, apologize and let him known that he didn't have to do it. But then her efforts would have meant nothing and she couldn't get what she wanted, what she needed. What they _both_ needed.

Also, she didn't think he would believe her.

Marinette shut down the computer, she was going to lose her mind if she kept reading. Any way she tried to see it, things were what they were, she was going to freeze to death. Well, _almost_ dead. And no step of that journey was going to be pleasant, no matter how much research she did.

She walked towards the bed and jumped at the mattress. She stared at the ceiling of Adrien's room.

She was nervous, but she wasn't experimenting any doubts, she still wanted to do this. It was her ticket back to normality, back to her own self.

They didn't think breaking Nooroo's magical barrier and take him out of her body would give Marinette her memory back, but she could dream, she could hope. They didn't know, they couldn't know for sure what was keeping Marinette's memories away. For all she knew, no matter how she had investigated, no matter how many times doctors had failed to diagnose her, this could be a normal memory loss and the magic had distorted the usual factors. She didn't like that option, and she tried to not think about it, it was the worst of them all because it was the one she had less control over. But she had a good guess that taking the kwami out was going to solve a thousand of the million problems she had, and she was trusting that it will also bring her memory back. She had to believe, at least a little.

"Marinette," A voice called. By now, she knew it too well, his voice was quite distinctive.

"Something wrong, Plagg?" Marinette sat on the bed, looking at the air looking for the floating creature, and for Adrien. If Plagg was back, Adrien was too, they never left each other's side. But, Adrien wasn't entering the room, which meant he didn't want to see her yet.

"I'm here," He said, sitting on her head.

"Is that the best place to talk to me?"

"I'm quite comfortable, thanks," He huffed, "I'll be quick,"

That didn't sound nice.

"I know why you did what you did, but if you dare to manipulate Adrien in the future like you did last night, not even Tikki is going to be able to save you from me, understood?"

Marinette wanted to smile, but she knew Plagg was being serious and she also considered what she had gone was wrong, so she tried her best to keep a serious face and not laugh. But she couldn't help but feel a little fuzzy inside. To know that Plagg loved Adrien like that made her heart happy. It was what Adrien deserved.

"I won't do it again, I know what I did was wrong," She sighed, "But I did not lie, everything I said to him was true,"

"I'm not calling you a liar, spots," Plagg appeared in front of her face, "I may not remember you being Ladybug, but I remember Ladybug and Marinette's personality. I've lived with Adrien for almost ten years, it's hard to shut him up when he is excited, worse when he is in love, so I've heard every running thought that he has had about you. Also, Tikki and I would talk about you two all time, you're our wielders, you mean something to us, as surprising as it sounds," It wasn't surprising, Plagg had shown himself as caring and lawful, but she kept quiet once again, it seemed like Plagg liked to keep a cover of who he was, she wasn't going to break the news to him. "And you better keep all your energy and motivation on keeping yourself alive. He can't bring you back as you did,"

"He is just as powerful as I was," Marinette frowned.

"That doesn't matter," Plagg crossed his little arms, "We don't have your earrings, we don't have Tikki. We can't bring you back,"

 _Oh…_

"I won't die," Marinette promised, "We'll have Nooroo and we'll find a way to look for Tikki and bring her back,"

Plagg didn't answer.

"I'm sorry I lost her," She whispered.

"It's not your fault, spots," Plagg's eyes opened wide, "You may not remember her but I know how much you loved her and took care of her. From all the Ladybugs she was lucky enough to meet and guide, you were one of her favorites, and that is quite impressive, Tikki has had extraordinary people under her care,"

"Yeah?"

"Oh, don't look at me with tender eyes! Disgusting!"

Marinette laughed loudly.

 **xx xx**

Marinette was on the rooftops. She couldn't remember the last time she had put on her vigilante clothes and climbed to the rooftops, but there she was. Sitting on top of a building next to hers and watching the cars driving through the night.

Yesterday's evening she had come back to the apartment. _Alone._

She did not ask anyone to come with her, but it would have been nice if someone had offered to make her company. She understood why no one had come, all of them were busy. Busy with their lives and busy because they were trying to help her recover her own life. It was selfish to be mad and blaming them for feeling lonely, but she had been selfish ever since she woke up on that hospital bed six years ago, it had become a part of her now.

She wondered if she had been like this before? She did not think Tikki would have chosen a selfish person to be Ladybug, she still couldn't remember her, but reading her diaries and listening how Plagg described her, Tikki sounded like a sweetheart, a pure soul.

Marinette touched the back of her head and ran her fingers through her hair as she moved closer to the top of her head. She'd done this many, many times before, looking for a scar and an explanation that simply wasn't there.

Losing your memory was not easy, losing all your memories not only erased the people and places you once made yours, it also erased your identity.

Alya, her parents and also Adrien, said she was just the same, but a part of her always felt like they were lying. She could not be the same, she did not have the memories that developed her personality. Some of them did come back, but they always felt like she was watching the world as if it was an old movie, not the world through her eyes. Actually, she had managed to remember almost everything that could help her create an image of the people she cared about. She lied saying it was everything, and when they spoke about it she would put on a fake smile, try to bring back one of those memories that she did remember and create a response based on that.

Yes, she did get flashbacks and memories hit her every once in a while, but they never felt like they belonged to her. Every memory she had gathered had not made her remember the people around her, she had seen them and she had been curious to know more, or she had felt guilty of forgetting them and put on her best work to reconnect with them. She didn't love her parents or Alya because of past memories, but she made them believe she did, the truth is that she had started loving them after getting to know them and seeing how much _they_ loved her.

There was only one exception. He always seemed to be.

That morning in the rain, it had struck her like a thunder and she had remembered him. It was still different to actually remembering someone, but all the feelings and emotions labeled with his name took shelter on her heart. She couldn't remember moments with Adrien, but she could remember, she could feel on her skin, how she made him feel. All those twisted, passionate and colorful sensations were warm and familiar and when she watched him she knew they were real.

 _Why was it different?_

Why when it came to other it felt like a stranger was shouting in her head, demanding her to remember by throwing her all these old memories and when it came to Adrien it was a simple song that echoed through her whole being?

Maybe it had something to do with the connection Plagg had mentioned. Resurrecting someone had to have its consequences and secondary effects, and maybe this was one of them. But then why hadn't she recognized him when she saw him climbing up the stairs on that first night?

She sighed. She wanted this to be over already, then she would also be done with the questions.

She stood up and started walking on the roof. She climbed one of the pipes and made it to the other building a few minutes later. This must have been easier before. She saw how easily Adrien could jump and run on the rooftops when he was transformed. Maybe after they found Tikki they could race each other.

She was climbing her third pipe wall when she was two dark silhouettes approaching. One was Chat Noir, so easy to recognize even a kilometer away and by his side, she could only guess that it was Willem transformed.

She jumped to the roof and waited there until they landed by her side.

She felt fuzzy inside when she saw Adrien. She left his house the past afternoon but she hadn't seen him since Monday night. He had spent half of the day training with Nino and Willem, the other half working, there was no time for her, and he did not try to make it either. Still, she felt happy to see him, she missed him.

She waved at them and smiled, trying to irradiate as much happiness as she could. She wanted them to think she was calm, that she was ready for what was about to go down tomorrow, they couldn't know she was nervous.

"Good night, Marinette," Willem said and made a little reverence. She found that cute so she did one back.

"Good night, Willem," Then she focused her sight on Adrien, "Salut, _minou,_ "

"Salut, princess," He looked at her from the corner of his eye.

"How was your day?" She asked looking at Willem, she was not going to push Adrien to talk to her if he did not want to, "Wait, before that!" She interrupted before Willem could answer, "It's the first time I see you in costume, it's so cool!"

Marinette approached him and circled him, analyzing the whole suit.

"It's so beautiful, Willem! Can I touch the feathers?" She asked, already extending her hand to touch his shoulder.

"Yes but be careful, they're not soft as they look," He warned her. A tender smile adorned his lips.

"Thank youuu," She touched immediately and he was right, they were not soft, they looked like any other kind of feather but they felt like steel. "Do they work as an armor?"

"Yes, but I mostly used them like a shield when I extend the wings,"

"That's convenient," Marinette noted, "We don't have wings, we should have wings. Though, cats don't have wings so we should create something for you, kitty. But I'm a ladybug, I should have wings. I've been robbed,"

"You have not used your costume in years, I'm sure once we find your stone and your kwami you'll be able to do some changes,"

"That would be amazing," Marinette threw her hands in the air excited. Maybe all the fake happiness was starting to rub on her, "Hey what about your superhero name? and Naomi's? I can't believe I have not asked this before," Marinette grinned.

"Naomi has a superhero name. Me? not really," Willem giggled. "Naomi wanted us to have really cool names and she came up with a thousand in an evening we were patrolling around Dam Square. It was a week after we met for the first time, so I did not know her at all and I did not take her seriously, also, every option she gave me was corny. She got mad and is still mad every time we bring up the subject. Naomi's name is _Lilabel._ Lila because of the color of her costume, and in dutch dragonfly is _libel,_ so she joined them. I'm just _Kraai,_ Dutch for crow. "

"For my French perspective both sound really cool! Also, we don't have very imaginative names either," Marinette shrugged. She looked at Adrien to see if he was smiling or at least listening to her, but he seemed lost in a thought. "Well, now, uh… how was today's training?"

Chat Noir and Kraai shared a look. A secret but short conversation started between them, then they looked at her again.

"I think I can do it," Chat Noir said. He lifted one hand and sprawled his claws, he rotated his wrist a few times, "Or at least Willem thinks I'm ready,"

"He is ready," Willem nodded, "He went through several pieces of ice and did not break them fully. He can do it,"

"Ice," Chat Noir said the word with rage, "Ice is not a person, but it's the only training we have so apparently I'm ready to stab you with my claws with my cataclysm"

Marinette flinched. And something sparked on Adrien's eyes, something she did not like.

"Sudden change of mind, _buginette_?" He asked, a smile threatening to appear.

"No," She said stuttering and with no conviction at all.

"Really? To me, it seems like your common sense bloomed in your brain again,"

"Don't talk to me like that," Marinette said between clenched teeth.

"I apologize if I sound mean but-

"Adrien," Willem cut, he put an arm in front of his chest, making him take a step backward.

"No, let him finish. I rather talk this out before we do anything together and, he is allowed to be mad with me," Marinette said.

"Mad? I'm not mad at you!" Chat Noir pushed Kraai's hand away and walked towards her. "I'm worried about you, those are different things,"

"No, you're mad, but you feel like you can't be mad at me so you're trying to excuse yourself. But you can be mad, you should be mad,"

"I'm _not_ mad," He frowned.

"You look mad," Marinette shrugged.

Adrien opened his mouth, he frowned one more time, he closed his mouth, he rubbed his temples and then spoke, "Yes, _now_ I'm mad because you are telling me that I am mad when I'm not. I really am worried about you because you are making decisions that could kill you. I know I accepted to do this, but I still have hope that you'll think this through and back off. I'm all for that option,"

"It's not happening," Marinette placed her hands on her hips, "I'm nervous about it but I'm not changing my mind. I know what it's at stake and I chose to do this anyways, and no one can change my mind,"

"You can still think about it. You flinched, I saw you, that's more than being nervous, you're scared and-

"No! We are doing this Adrien!" Marinette clashed her hands against his chest. "Listen to me, please just listen to me. I took this decision with a cold mind, this is not an impulse. I've done my research, I've had two days to think about it and I'm not changing my mind,"

She looked down, at their feet. She pressed her forehead against him and let the tears fall down.

"I never feel like me," Marinette whispered. "The only times I felt like a whole person was when I was around Nath. He knew me but not well enough, so he helped me become the person everyone told me I was and at the same time he tried to know me, not the Marinette he knew from school but the one he knew now, so, he allowed me to be whoever I wanted to be. It's one of the reasons why I loved him so much," Adrien's body was rigid so she hugged him tightly, trying to make him release the stress. "I just want to be me. I'm really sorry for being selfish, especially when you're involved, Adrien. But I am tired of trying to recollect pieces and build who I am supposed to be. I'm tired of not knowing if what I feel is real or it's just something I've programmed myself to feel to be what everyone says I am. I want to be me without doubting it,"

Marinette looked up, she cupped his cheek and softly pushed his head so he would look straight at her.

"Those are my selfish reasons, they are exactly the same reasons I told you two days ago but they more make sense now, right? That night I really wanted you to say yes so I also told you about my desires to be with you. They are real, I do want us to heal together, but that night I did not tell you that because I wanted you to know, I throw it in because I wanted to convince you, and it worked. But now, I'm being more straightforward. I want to have my memory back because of selfish reasons, if you don't want to do it that's okay, you can back down if you want, I'll ask Willem. I'm not dragging you with me if you don't actually want to,"

Adrien sighed. "I knew what you were doing, Marinette, I saw it in your eyes before you started speaking. The timing was horrible and I spent the last two days feeling horrible because I knew you had manipulated me, but at the end of the day, _you never lied._ That night I did say yes because of the tension of the moment, but today I'm saying yes because I can't let you do something stupid alone, I still want you to retreat, don't get me wrong, but we are a team, we do stupid things together, we put our lives at risk together and we trust each other's instincts and if you think this is the only choice, then I'll trust you,"

"So, let me get this straight. You still think this is a bad idea?"

"Yes,"

"But you're going to do it because we are a team?"

"Yes,"

"It doesn't make any sense, Adrien. Really, you can say no, I'm sorry I pushed you to say yes,"

"It doesn't have to make sense, we only have to do it, and I'm not letting you do this without me," Chat Noir took Marinette's hand between her gloved hand. "It's you and me until the day we die, and probably, even after then," He kissed her palm and closed his eyes, holding her closer.

"Forever has never sound sweeter," Marinette stood on the points of her toes and kissed his cheek. Then she remembered Willem and blushed, but when she looked around to find him, he wasn't there.

"He already left, Mari," Adrien giggled.

"Why are you guys doing here anyway? Did you come to tell me you could do it?"

"Yes," Adrien nodded, "And also we wanted to ask you a question,"

"What?"

"Is there a particular reason why you gave us two days to practice?"

"No, I only want to do this as fast as possible,"

"Oh, cool," Marinette rose a brow. He did not found this cool at all. "Then what about tonight?"

"Tonight? Why? Are you sure?"

"Nino and Wayzz said that if you didn't have any problems it would be better if we did this tonight, at two am to be exact,"

"I'm okay with it but why at that time? Is something happening?"

"It's the second day of the full moon, and at two am it's the exact half of the four days of this particular full moon. If we get you at the horrible state of almost death at that point of the night my powers will be stronger and more effective. We studied these things with Master Fu years ago, I forgot I knew about it until Nino mentioned it, but the moon not only affects the ocean, it affects the whole world and it gives strength to our stones too,"

"He did not tell me that. Why?"

"He said you were bossy and that I had more chances to convince you,"

Marinette laughed, "He is insane. C'mon, let's go find him I'll have and tell him I'm ready to do this tonight. After this is over I'll have a word or two with him. Also, tonight at two am, is still technically tomorrow,"

Adrien laughed, and it was a good sound to listen before making her way to her death sentence.

 **PART 2.**

"This bathroom is bigger than my room," Alya said, "I did not remember it being this big,"

Marinette hugged her legs and pressed her cheek against her knees. She was sitting on the border of the big marble bathtub, it was cold and she was only wearing a black swimsuit, but she was trying to get accustomed to the cold before she jumped into a bathtub full of ice in a few minutes.

"Marinette, do you remember it being this big?" Alya asked. An innocent question, but it annoyed Marinette.

"I remember loving Adrien, not anything else," She huffed. "What are you still doing here, 'Lya? I thought you had to finish an article,"

"Only readproof," She corrected, one finger up, "and Charlene can do that, I trust her that much,"

"You're putting too much pressure on that girl," She loved Alya but she would never work under her wing, that sounded like a living nightmare.

"She is only two years younger than us, you know? And she has what it takes, and I'm pushing her towards the edge because I know she can take it. After me she will be ready for anything, I think she is going to be my rival actually,"

"And yet you're still training her," Marinette giggled.

"I'm not afraid of rivalry, and if she triumphs I'll be extremely proud. Talent is meant to be shared,"

"That's sweet of you,"

"You want me to go, don't you?" Alya laughed, but her face did not match with it.

"Don't get mad, but, yes? I'm nervous and I know every single one of you is nervous too. You mean the world to me, Alya, I can sense you're terrified of this going wrong, and that's the last thing I need,"

"Leaving won't change that, I'll be worried at home, you know that,"

"I know, but sometimes when you don't see things, you forget,"

"You'll have to forgive me later, I won't leave. If you don't want to see me I won't be inside the bathroom as you're in the bathtub, but I'm not leaving this house, and I'm not leaving this bathroom until I have to,"

Marinette looked at the clock Nino brought. The hands of the clock were about to strike 1 am.

"I think that's going to be now, babe," Marinette said, her breath caught on her throat.

"No," Alya pouted, but one look at the clock was enough. She stood up and wrapped Marinette on her arms.

Marinette hugged her back, she pressed her head against her neck and tightened the hug.

"Don't die, I forbid it," Alya whispered.

"I won't. Nino will be here and Adrien would never kill me,"

"It also depends on you, Mari," Alya cupped her cheeks, "When I found you in that dirty and odd building, you were wounded and there was so much blood around you, the whole room was splattered in red, every time I think about it it doesn't make sense that you are alive right now, but then I remember how stubborn you are, you held on to life and you did not let death drag you. I want you to do the same now, when you feel death approaching, you tell it that you're not going, that you need to come back, do you hear me?" Marinette giggled and then nodded, not long passed before she started sobbing.

"I love you," Marinette said cleaning her tears with the back of her hand.

"I love you too, Marinette," Alya moved Marinette's hand, and cleaned her tears with her thumbs. "Don't die, it's an order,"

"I won't, I promise," Marinette wrapped her arms around Alya and held her tight.

Alya did not hug her for long, she took a step backward, smiled at her one last time and left the bathroom.

Marinette sat back on the edge of the bathtub. She arranged the straps of her bathing suit and waited. She could feel Naomi's energy, the only creation energy that was strong enough for her to feel without a miraculous and started focusing on her breathe.

This was happening. She needed to stay calm.

The door opened only a second later after she felt Naomi's energy hit her.

Adrien entered first, then Nino and Willem and last but not least Naomi, all wearing their bright and beautiful costumes. But in Marinette's eyes, Naomi's was the winner.

It was mostly lilac like Willem had pointed out that evening, but it also had shades of green and it was iridescent when the light caught a right angle it glowed as if it had sparkles. Her mask did not look like one, it was as if it was painted on her skin in beautiful swirls. She had to antennas on top of her head, and the most amazing part of the whole costume was the four dragonfly wings. They were transparent but the lines of the shapes in them were glittery purple. Marinette looked for a weapon but there was nothing.

"It's on my back," Naomi said. Marinette jolted, she did not mean to be caught staring.

Naomi turned around, revealing a better angle to admire her wings and at the center a bow that tied them together. It was a strange sight, bugs did not have a bow holding their wings, it wasn't anatomically correct, but design wise, it was a beautiful detail.

"It's a whip, it has spheres at the end as you can see. It serves the same propose as your yo-yo,"

"Does it create objects too?" Marinette asked.

"Yes," Naomi nodded. She moved her hand to her back and pulled off the bow. It united swiftly, Naomi swirled her hand and the motion brought the whip to her front. The purple spheres glowed like neon lights while the whip spun. "We'll need it now,"

"For what?" Marinette smiled, excited.

"Don't look so happy, you're not going to like what I'm going to create. You're going to be on freezing water, it's not natural to stay inside, your body is going to ask you to escape, and you might answer. We need to contain you," Naomi's mouth sat in a hard line.

"Oh," She winced.

Adrien moved closer to her, he touched her lower back with his hand and ducked to be closer to her face. "It will help you to not fail accidentally, but in any case that you really back down and don't want to do this anymore, we thought it would be better to have a safe word,"

"A safe word? Like in sex?" Marinette asked, the last part wasn't meant to be said out loud, but her thoughts had been so fast that she did not get the chance to stop her mouth.

Adrien cackled. Marinette's face turned bright red.

"Yes, like in sex," Adrien said still between giggles, "But try not to choose one we could use later, okay?" That made her blush more, and Adrien, after realizing what he said, blushed too.

"You two stop flirting and choose a safe word, please? I really don't want to hear this," Nino interrupted. His hands were covering his ears.

"Yeah, yeah," Marinette nodded. "Something short, and easy to understand, right?"

"Yes, and it doesn't have to be anything that you could say because you're desperate, it has to be something you have to actually think about and has nothing to do with the situation,"

"Mm," Marinette chewed her lower lip, "What about 'cake'? I don't think it sounds like anything I would scream if things went south,"

" _Cake_ ," Naomi repeated, "Yeah, I think it's fine, we'll go with it,"

"Yes, it's a good word, now with that done, let's get down to business," Nino clapped his hands together and approached Marinette. "Ready for this, Nette?"

"As much as I can be," She answered, pulling a smile.

"So, let's start streaming that water," Nino opened the faucet of the bathtub, and the water started filling the tub. Faster than a normal faucet, thanks to Nino's water control.

"Let's go down the plan one more time," Naomi said while looking at her husband. He nodded at her and started talking.

"We'll start gradually, once the tub is filled near the top, we will turn its temperature to be at twenty degrees Celsius. Once ready, Marinette gets inside. We start then: every, ten minutes, approximately, -I think it could be less- we will lower the water's temperature by five degrees until we reach minus ten degrees Celsius. That's a dangerous temperature, people can last alive around ten minutes in those conditions," Willem explained, "That's a critical moment. Marinette will start to fall asleep if she manages to speak, she will make no sense, but our cue is her cardiac arrest, it's meant to happen and when it does, we must act fast," Marinette trembled. She knew the plan by heart now, but she was at minutes to execute it. She was nervous, she couldn't hide it. She glanced at Adrien, trying to read his body language, but he was keeping his body under control. He did not look worried, he did not look anxious and his face was in a perfect poker face.

She looked back at Willem who was still explaining their plan.

"Nino you need to be controlling Marinette's vital signs and the temperature of the water all the time if you need help don't hesitate and ask, we'll find a solution. When you feel that Marinette reaches the edge you scream: _now_. Loud and clear. That marks Adrien's start," Willem turned around to look at Chat Noir, "At the moment Nino screams, you act, immediately. There's no time to think, you only go for it. You'll have cataclysm ready when Marinette starts falling asleep so we don't miss any precious seconds, we can't risk anything. How the moment you'll be using cataclysm towards Marinette will go is unclear, a complete mystery. We don't know if Marinette's gonna react if Nooroo is going to attack back if she is going to stay the same. Anything could happen, so whatever goes down, we deal with it,"

Willem stayed in silence, he fixed his sight on Adrien who was awfully quiet.

"I'll be watching over you Adrien, I won't let you fail, I promise" Willem squeezed Adrien's shoulder. Marinette smiled at them. She was going to give the biggest hug to Willem after all of this was over, he was doing a spectacular job at taking care of Adrien. Better than anything Gabriel had ever done.

"Once Nooroo is out, Willem will take him, because he is the only one of us with destruction energy besides Adrien, but we don't know if Adrien's is going to have the energy necessary to keep Nooroo balanced. Gabriel won't be able to be here but he left behind instruments that will help Willem take care of little Nooroo," Naomi followed, "As I said, we don't know what's going to happen with you Adrien, you might be too tired, the energy could knock you out, cataclysm could take too much of you and you could faint. You're another blind point in this plan, so it will be my job and Nino's to bring Marinette back. We can't do it quickly or we'll kill her. I have it under control, I've Nino will slowly regulate the water temperature back up and I will create something to warm up Marinette when the time is right. This process will drain all your energy, darling, so feel free to take as much energy as you need, I won't' mind,"

"I don't think I'll be conscious enough to decide that," Marinette whispered.

"I know, but I'm telling you this so you don't feel wrong after. I'm staying by your side mostly for you to recharge, okay?"

"Okay," She nodded, "Thank you, Naomi,"

"We have two minutes," Nino announced, "Anything you want to say before jumping in the water, Nette?"

Marinette did not have to think much about it, there was only one thing she had been wanting to say the whole time. "Thank you, to all of you, this means the world to me,"

All of them but Adrien smiled back. He tried though, and she appreciated that.

He had the worst job in the whole plan. He said he managed to control cataclysm, but this would be the first time he would use it in a person, and they were in the dark about any consequence that it could unleash. It was okay if he didn't fake his feelings. He had the right to be nervous.

Marinette gave a big step and stood in front of him. She took his hands and separated them so he could stop fidgeting. She stood on the points of her toes and closed the distance between their faces. She brushed her nose against his, lips barely touching. As much as she wanted to kiss him, right now was not the right moment. However, she did not back away from him.

"I love you," she whispered.

"And I love you," He said back. The corners of his mouth turned up.

"I know I hated you and I was awfully mean to you at the beginning, but you're the best thing that has happened to me. You're the only thing that feels real, and nothing has felt real in the whole time I've been awake, you not only feel real, you make _everything_ real, you make _me_ real. When my love for you came back, I don't want it to sound like you're the only reason why I'm alive because that's not it, I promise I'm not obsessed, I just... felt like someone would finally understand me and we have been fighting and tangled in drama this whole time but once I'm back -because I'll be back- I hope my memories are back so I will be able to understand you too, because as much as I try, without any backstory it's impossible and I meant my promise, I want us to heal together, _minou_ ," They did not have much privacy with three other people in the bathroom, so she whispered very low trying to keep the moment as intimate as she could.

"We will," Adrien pressed their foreheads together, "Because every word you said, I feel it too," Adrien intertwined his hand with hers, he pulled it closer to his mouth and kissed her wrist. "Don't die on me, _my lady,"_

"I won't, _mon minou,_ " Marinette winked, to take the pressure and darkness out of the subject.

Adrien smiled with his whole face. He kissed her forehead and pointed the bathtub with a move of his chin.

"Well, let's do this," Marinette said. She looked at Nino, looking for confirmation that she could get in the bathtub.

"Go for it, M," Nino said. And Marinette did.

She sat on the edge of the tub and submerged her feet slowly until the water reached her knees. It wasn't cold, but it was not as warm as she liked her baths to be, and this water was about to get colder. Why was she doing this? Oh, right, her memory, Tikki, her life. She would not complain.

She figured that the fastest she went down completely, the easiest it would be. She took a big breath and with all her courage, she sat and immersed herself in the water.

She came back to the surface fast but stayed sit, she was already wet from head to toe, drops of water were running through her face and her hair was sticking to the back of her neck and shoulders.

"First step, check," Marinette said. She rubbed her eyes to see better. "What's next?"

"This," Naomi said. She took her whip one more time and twirled it. The purple spheres shone brighter and sparkles flew from them, slowly building an object in the air.

A harness dropped to the ground when the light stopped. Naomi took it and showed it to Marinette.

"Put this on, I'll tie it to the bathtub," She gave Marinette the harness. She inspected it before putting it on, trying to figure it out of what material it was done because it did not feel like anything she had touched before.

She couldn't figure it out, but it was heavy and extremely soft, she would ask Naomi later.

She put it on, and with help of Naomi, she tied it tight. With the help of more magic, Naomi created handcuffs and bands for her hands and ankles.

Naomi and Willem checked two times each, to make sure the restrains would work and she wouldn't be capable to involuntarily escape.

"Does it hurt?" Adrien asked. His eyes were fixed on her wrists, looking for red lines or any sign of discomfort.

"It's fine," Marinette said. Fine wasn't the word to describe it, she did feel uncomfortable but they did not hurt.

"We have to start now, are you ready?" Willem asked.

"Yes," She nodded with determination. This was it.

"Nino,"

"On it," Nino winked. "Everyone on their positions,"

"Yes," They answered.

"Yes," Marinette said, and closed her eyes, leaning backward so half of her head could touch the water.

"We start. Minus five degrees," Nino announced.

Marinette felt the change of temperature immediately, she flinched and closed her eyes with more strength than necessary so she started seeing stars and colors.

She tried to keep her respiration at a decent rhythm, she kept her eyes closed and imagined a nice and beautiful place, to not freak out before the hard part started.

She answered to Naomi's and Nino's questions, but she did not say much, if she said more than "yes" or "no" she was going to start rambling and she could spill how terrified she actually was and she couldn't do that, if she showed any extreme emotion Adrien could get overprotective or nervous and she couldn't afford that at this moment.

She heard Nino's second announcement, she also felt the decrease in temperature. She did not wait for them to ask her if she was okay, she said it and then she heard them whispering, not talking directly at her but trying to converse about things that could keep her at ease.

Nino announced he was going to lower the temperature one more time. She answered, and she was tempted to open her eyes and look at Adrien, but that would require to sit and she couldn't leave the water, her head had to be touching the water too.

Those ten minutes did not go as fast as the first ones had. She was actually trembling right now, and she had tried to flex her legs and leave the water for a few seconds but luckily, Naomi's harness and bands kept her on the bathtub, they were so strong that she couldn't move a millimeter.

Marinette started feeling anxious, and her mood turned worse when she heard that Nino dropped another five degrees.

She whimpered, she was frigid and they hadn't reached the ultimate temperature. She started trembling, her teeth were chattering and she started to breathe irregularly.

 _Take me out of here, take me out of here, please take me out of here, it's too cold._

She tried to bite her lip and stop the words from coming out of her mouth but her shivers wouldn't allow her. She only hoped they weren't thinking of backing up by seeing her at this state because it would only get worse.

She did not open her eyes if she did she was going to lose the little determination that was keeping her from giving up.

Her head and her chest started hurting. She was expecting the headache, only a secondary effect of the freezing water, but her chest was a surprise. It felt like someone was compressing her heart with a hand of steel. She felt the tears pricking her eyes, she pressed her eyes shut but then the pain was too unbearable and she cried out for help.

"Make it stop! Please, make it stop!" She rocked her body from side to side and shook her hands up and down to get the bands around her wrists off, "Please!"

"Stay calm, Marinette, you're strong enough, only a few more minutes," Naomi's voice sounded distant. If it wasn't for her loud energy she would have believed she left the bathroom.

"No, no, I can't, I, no, please, please, it hurts!"

Marinette kept moving and crying.

Adrien who had stayed far away from her, ignoring the situation so he wouldn't ruin it, turned around and swiftly approached to the bathtub.

"Marinette, try to-

"What hurts?" Adrien interrupted Naomi. He kneeled down and leaned next to the tub so she could hear his voice better.

"It hurts, kitty," Marinette sobbed, not answering the question.

Her body kept shaking from the cold and she was still agitated and trying to untie herself.

"Is this normal?" Adrien asked, looking for Naomi and Willem's. But before they could answer he turned to Nino "How are her vitals? Is she okay? Are these hallucinations? I read about it, she could have hallucinations, but I think for those we need lower temperatures. Could it had started before?"

"Her vitals are fine, all in order, but I can feel her experiencing pain, I don't know where is coming from, but I can tell you this is not a hallucination," Nino said, his hands were above Marinette, just closer than they had been the whole time, water was moving around her, glowing as Nino used his powers.

"Stop, stop! Let me out!" Marinette shouted.

Adrien felt his heart contract.

"Minus five degrees," Nino announced. He snapped his fingers, the water was glowing brighter and Marinette gasped loud.

"It's going to be okay, princess, we are almost there, you're doing great," Adrien said. It was for her comfort as well as his. She was strong, she could do this, he had to believe that she could do this.

"STOP! STOP NOW!"

"Guys," Nino's voice sounded like an alarm on Adrien's ears.

"What's wrong?"

"I sense Nooroo," He said.

"We were right," Adrien gasped. He had been scared that they were going to reach a loose end and that they would have been risking Marinette's life for nothing. But Nino sensed Nooroo, Nino whose job was to keep the miraculous safe, Nino's whose powers were stronger when it came to feel energies. Nino couldn't be wrong, but then why didn't he look relieved?

"What is it?" Willem asked.

"His energy is suppressing Marinette's, it feels just like when we found her on the rooftop as Ladybug,"

That was bad.

"Make the temperature lower," Naomi ordered.

"Naomi," Willem warned her, at the same time Adrien and Nino screamed. "What?!"

"That's dangerous!" Nino said.

"You're going to kill her!" Adrien stood up. His hands were in fists and he was clenching his teeth so hard they creaked.

"We need to knock her down. _Fast._ We don't know what is going to happen if she turns into Ladybug again or if Nooroo takes over. We are trying to take him out and if we take him out while Marinette is transformed the consequences could be worse,"

"But-" Adrien was about to say but his best friend interrupted him.

"I'm doing it," Nino didn't hesitate. Adrien looked at him with eyes wide open, "It is still the plan, I won't let her die, Adrien, I promise,"

"But what if-" This time he was interrupted for another one of Marinette's cries for help.

"STOP IT! PLEASE!" Marinette opened her eyes. They were trembling too, they made her look insane, but the worst part was that they were purple.

Adrien knew there was no other option.

"Do it," He ordered Nino.

He went around the tub and found the perfect spot beside it. This was going to go down fast, he needed to be ready.

"Cataclysm," He whispered.

The warm rush of energy ran through his veins, from his heart to his arm. It was as overwhelming as it had been the first months after getting the miraculous. He felt the dark energy tickling his fingers, ready to attack at any given moment.

Marinette kept screaming, but Adrien ignored her if he concentrated on her words he was going to take her out of the water, and that's not what she wanted. She was losing her mind, but there was a part of her that was still holding on to the plan, she hadn't said her safe word yet. She was suffering but she still wanted to do this, and he was not going to leave her now.

And they didn't last long, Nino's fast change of coldness in the water made Marinette scream louder and shake harder than she had before, but after one minute her screams started to die down. Her eyes were still purple but they were not glowing like neon lights anymore, and she had completely stopped trembling.

It was about time. He wanted this to be over, it had been the longest fifty minutes of his life.

Marinette started babbling and her eyes were droopy. Adrien put one foot in the bathtub, at one side of Marinette's body, then the other to her right side. He looked at Nino, waiting for his orders.

"Any minute now," Nino whispered. Adrien nodded.

"We're doing this, princess. Is about to be over, you'll be okay soon," He said to her even if he knew she couldn't hear him.

Marinette's chest went up and down at an alarmingly slow rhythm, her mouth hanging open and her eyes were finally closed.

He did not need Nino's call to know it was time, but he waited to hear his shout anyways.

" ** _NOW!_** "

Adrien didn't think, he didn't hesitate, he went for it.

Just like in training he opened his hand, separated his fingers as far as he could and in a fast movement he attacked. He perforated Marinette's skin like a bunch of arrows, right in the middle of her collarbones, almost touching the base of her throat.

Adrien kept his eyes on Marinette's face if he watched down at his fingers through Marinette's chest he was not going to be able to control his power. He needed to look at her, the woman he loved, his partner, his best friend, his everything. The one who asked him to save her, the girl he had promised to protect until the end of his days. He loved her so much, he was not going to be the one to kill her.

He looked at her and he thought on the energy that was running through his body and reaching Marinette, he imagined the energy as black liquid that ran through his fingers, he imagined it dripping and coagulating in a big mass that was going to stay in the place under the scar, not going anywhere else but the creative energy that he was starting to feel. Not going near her lungs, near her heart or an artery, it was going to stay there where Nooroo was and only touch it because he wasn't going to kill Marinette.

It had only been seconds after his attack when Marinette opened her eyes. The purple glow was back and so was her strength. She tried to sit up but she was unable to. Adrien had been surprised but thanks to whatever powerful force that was taking care of him he did not move.

Adrien started to feel warm, a hot wave of air hit him, it was suffocating. It felt like being in a sauna, but he couldn't tell from where it was coming for. As startling as it was he did not move.

 _I won't kill you, princess._

The frozen water did not feel cold anymore, he looked down and saw the bubbles popping all around. The water was boiling. What was going on?

Adrien was about to speak. He was confused that no one was saying anything when he realized he was not in the bathroom anymore. Marinette was still in front of him, they were still in the tub, his hands were still piercing between her collarbones, but all around him was black.

Marinette looked like a maniac, her eyes were crying tears of blood and her mouth was dripping a strange black substance.

Adrien knew this wasn't real, this was a trick, it had to be. Nooroo had to be defending himself and if he didn't do something he was going to forget what was real and what was not and he was going to lose Marinette.

He had not wanted to do this, he had only used this power twice and he did not have the best memories of it, it was too difficult to control and Ladybug had warned him to only use it as a last resource.

If cataclysm was not being effective to pull Nooroo out of his partner then he was going to have to use his last resource, if not he was going to get trapped in the illusion and he would fail Marinette.

"I won't kill you, my lady," He said, reassuring himself. Willem had said it, he loved her and his love was not going to allow him to fuck up.

" _Catastrophe,_ " He whispered.

The energy was ten times what cataclysm was. He felt high on the rush very quickly but the logical part of his mind was still predominant. He guided the energy and unleashed it straight to his claws.

He heard Marinette scream, then he saw her faint.

He looked at his hands, worried that he had made a mistake. Around his fingers, a glowing circle of purple light was appearing. Marinette's body started shaking and he did too.

Next thing he knew he was flying to the other side of the bathroom. Crashing against the wall as if he had just been hit by a bus.

The last thing he saw was a glowing sphere floating in the middle of the room and the shadow of a pair of wings on the wall.

The last thing he heard was Nino's words.

 _"You did it!"_


	29. Double Vision

Adrien looked at himself in the mirror. The reflection that stared back at him had no similarity to the one that had stared back at him only a few months ago when he was just back in Paris and his only worry was how his hair was going to look on his first day as a teacher.

He wondered, how after all this time, after all the horrible scenarios he had gone through and after all the pain he had suffered, how was that not enough for a lifetime? Because life kept throwing him more and more mysteries and question without giving him answers.

Why did he have to be a part of them? Was there no one else available for it?

He had no answer to those question. It was only him, he had learned that already and because of it, he was really good at hiding how he was really feeling, if he hadn't mastered that ability, his life would be even messier.

He was able to go through his days pretending he was in one piece when he actually was falling apart slowly. It was so easy to fool everyone around him.

A little bit of concealer, hair gel, a nice outfit, and of course, the perfect accessory to complete the look was his warm, but fake, smile. That's how he had been able to survive his job, how he had kept his head above water when he was surrounded by colleagues and students, and how he had fooled himself to think that he could keep going because no one seemed to notice, so no one pointed a finger.

Today was different.

He could see it on his reflection, this time the mirror did not lie; he was an absolute mess.

He touched the bandage around his forehead, close to his right temple and his ear, he felt the bump that had formed from the hit against the wall. The pain was still fresh, so he made sure not to press down too harshly.

The bags under his eyes were so prominent, that no one would believe that he had been sleeping for a whole day. He did not believe it himself, because he still felt exhausted.

The magic he had used had been so strong and powerful that it had taken almost every piece of Adrien's soul and magic. The last time he had used it, it had cost him his life.

How was he still on his feet was still a mystery, like everything happening around him.

Adrien pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

Did he really have to go to work? Yeah, he had. He really wanted to skip, but he had already missed a day.

Alya had called his supervisor and informed him that Adrien had been on a car accident and that he would go back as soon as he could. That was today because Adrien couldn't miss days at work, he had the feeling he would have to ask for vacations soon, something big was approaching and he couldn't put his job at risk for a series of simple reasons. One, he really liked his job; two, Marinette would be enraged if he lost his job because he had stayed to take care of her. Skipping work was not an option.

Adrien pressed his hands against the bathroom sink and leaned down. This was just the start of a horrible day.

He fixed his hair as much as he could, but the bandage did not help his goal. He did not try to put concealer under his eyes, it was not going to work, so he put special effort on his outfit. Nothing out of the ordinary, a nice sweater with a simple shirt underneath. Pants and one of the blazers Marinette and his father had designed for him.

He washed his face four times before leaving the bathroom, an attempt to look as awake and alive as he could.

He did not have a big breakfast, he was not hungry but he forced himself to eat to restore energy anyways.

He sat down on the kitchen stool and rolled his phone on his hands. He had been waiting for a call the whole morning.

Nino brought him home last night, a few hours after waking up. He said that he had to be away from Marinette.

Their energy was tied together, balancing each other, and while in other occasions that would have been fantastic, Marinette's energy was acting in chaotic ways that could damage them both, so he had to leave.

They did not allow him to see her. He did not leave without a fight, but he did not win, and he was still angry about it.

He just wanted to see with his own eyes that she was okay. He did not expect any of them to lie to him about something so important, but what if they were trying to protect him? He really wanted to see her, and hold her, and take care of her. But they wouldn't allow it.

Nino promised to call him if something changed, he promised he would be the first to know. No matter how little the change was, if something happened to Marinette, he had to know.

He was also worried about what could potentially happen with Nooroo, but it was not his priority.

Also, he had seen Willem before leaving. He looked as exhausted as he felt, but he was calm. He said everything was going well, and that Nooroo would probably wake up in a few days. He was back on his stone, recharging, the only thing left was to wait.

He still couldn't believe what he had done.

It was still hard to believe that Nooroo had been inside Marinette this whole time. They had talked about it and planned for a week, only focusing on that theory but it only felt real when his hand was piercing through Marinette's chest and when he started hallucinating.

He looked at the palm of his hand, another scar had appeared just on top of the old one. Another reminder that he should not use _catastrophe_ for any circumstance, yet he had made use of it _again_.

The decision had been taken under the rush and adrenaline of the moment because it had been a terrible and dangerous decision. He had been so worried about Marinette, and so against the plan and he had been the one that almost ruined it.

But, it had been the right call, so it was better if he did not cry over it because it was over, they were way past that.

Marinette only had to wake up and things would be bright again.

"Ugh," He grunted. He pressed his cheek against the cold table and repressed a scream.

He wanted to see Marinette, it wasn't fair that he was here while Nino was taking care of her.

He was her partner! And her boyfriend! Well, _sort of_.

They had not talked about it but after all the conversations they had shared and the love confessions he thought there was no need to ask her out. But it had been brought to his attention that Marinette had never said anything about breaking up with Nathanael, and she had been with him only a few nights ago. He was the one she ran to when she had questions. So, where did that left them?

He was sure that there was nothing going on between them, but he hadn't asked, he couldn't assume, he couldn't label her feelings for her, he had done that when he was younger. But, this time was different, things had changed and they were not teenagers anymore.

He grunted one more time. Life was a constant frustration state and is love life shouldn't be on his mind right now. He had to focus on her recovery and the mystery that surrounded them. That was bigger than what their relationship status was, they could discuss that later on.

He looked at the watch on his wrist and sighed. He really did not want to go to work, but at least it was going to work to distract himself for a few hours.

 **xx**

When Marinette opened her eyes she did not saw the starry night sky she had last seen. It was a white roof.

And she was not lying on the harsh cold ground, all the opposite, she was in an extremely soft and warm bed.

Before she could freak out about it, a snap of a memory appeared on her mind.

Marinette touched her left cheek with her fingertips and created a pattern until she touched her lips, her nose, her brows and then her other cheek.

Marinette jolted, and in one move she was sitting on the bed.

She looked around, trying to place herself in time. She recognized the walls, she recognized the bookshelves and those big windows. She recognized this bedroom, but it did not make any sense.

 ** _No._**

She touched her face again, this time with both of her hands, then she touched her neck, then her chest, her stomach, her legs, and swiftly came back to her chest, unbuttoning the pajamas she was wearing and touching between her collar bones where she felt the residues of energy.

She couldn't remember what had happened, but she recognized that energy.

She looked around one more time, trying to find where the magic creature irradiating that energy could be, but it was nowhere to be found.

Marinette rubbed her eyes, to adjust her sight. She opened them and looked around once again, her vision had not changed, she was still on Adrien's bedroom.

 _"No, no, no, no, no,"_ Tears started streaming down her eyes.

This wasn't supposed to be happening. She wasn't supposed to come back, she wasn't supposed to be set free.

Marinette rubbed her temples. Slowly but steadily, strange memories were building upon her mind.

A part of her was telling her that she was not supposed to be there, while the other understood perfectly what was going on, and that this was exactly what it had to happen, that the plan had worked perfectly.

It was a strange thing, something she couldn't explain, something she did not think possible until she realized it was happening.

She took a deep breath and bit her bottom lip. This was crazy, but it was happening. _Now what?_

Marinette sat on the edge of the bed, her legs hanging off the mattress. She gave a little jump and touched the wood floor with her feet.

She had been here before, a long time ago, but also just a few months ago.

Marinette sighed.

How could a single person get in so much trouble?

Marinette touched her face and her arms once again, trying to find any differences, but she would need a mirror to be sure. Marinette walked to the bathroom to look for one.

She closed her eyes before stepping in front of it, already knowing what she was about to see, but still scared of the new discovery she was going to do.

She stood in front of the sink, she swallowed and opened her eyes.

There she was.

The "her" she knew was an unknown person at the very same time. She knew she had seen it before and she recognized herself, but it was still unfamiliar.

She reached to touch her hair, it was in braids, she untied them and let the hair fall on top of her shoulders and lower. It was wavy and it looked longer than she had ever worn it before.

Her skin was pale, and her under eyes were as grey as the weather behind the windows.

There had been ice, right? Maybe she had not fully recovered of that.

She tried to remember what she knew she had read because that strange part of her brain was telling her that she had done research about freezing and dying of hypothermia, but it was useless, she couldn't reach it, all the information was gone.

She looked at herself again and sighed with relief, as confused and worried as she was, she could find a little bit of comfort by seeing herself in the mirror.

She had been in the back of her own mind all this time, watching a strange version of herself become the owner of her body. She realized that she had not forgotten the essential parts of that new Marinette.

If she tried to reach for a memory of the past six years, it came back to her, it appeared like an old movie that she had borrowed from someone else, but she knew it was her.

She had been trapped for so long, yet it felt like only hours ago she had been running for her life but really it had been six years, she knew that but she couldn't understand it, she could not dimension it.

For her, all the things she had seen had been a bad dream. A bad dream where she was constantly screaming for release and trying to keep herself chained. A constant nightmare of watching through your own eyes how you were taking all the incorrect decisions, how you were suffering when you did not need to be.

It was like watching a puppet show from the inside of the puppet. While she was in there, another part of her brain, another entity of her had been controlling her and all the time she knew she had been an impostor.

Those memories belonged to her, and she felt the parts of her that had been created as parts of her too, but it was like an odd piece in a puzzle. That part of the puzzle fit, but it was a different color, a different picture, it was not completely right.

This part of her had existed for six years, and it had pieces of her own self but also new ones. She couldn't explain it, she felt like she was two Marinettes, all in one vase.

She couldn't be twenty-four, but it did not make any sense for her to be eighteen. She was not one nor the other.

The memories of the past six years were slowly filling her head. It was like her head was a computer, slowly downloading new archives.

They felt real and hers but they still felt far away. She could see them as a movie, as a viewer but not as the protagonist she was supposed to be.

She kept staring at her reflection. It was still her, but she felt like an impostor in her own life.

How was she going to explain this? Everyone around her had had enough of her, and now she will throw more problems at them.

Her parents would probably be overjoyed because she would actually remember her childhood, but all the new memories, all the bonds they had tied in this past six years, they felt so far away, they were so impersonal that they would have to pass again that awkward stage that had separated them.

Alya would go crazy, she had done everything in her power to make her remember, if it wasn't for her effort they wouldn't be friends today, and all of that for nothing? For Marinette to have these new memories but not feel anything but disgust towards them, because that wasn't actually her? All the new bonds and secrets Alya had shared with her, all gone. Once again she would hurt her.

And, Adrien... _Adrien._

Her stomach twisted, the bitter taste of jealousy and anger filled her.

He loved her, Adrien loved her.

Well, he had always loved her, as Ladybug and as Marinette. And in all the different ways a person could love, Adrien had loved her. But now he was _in love with her_. In love with this…. this _parasite_.

Marinette's whole body shook. She felt sick, nauseous, she felt like puking.

 _Why?_ It wasn't fair!

She was a good person, she always put other people first, she spent her teenage years fighting evil! She only wanted peace and quiet, she only wanted to be happy and that's what she got in return?

Marinette sobbed. The tears blurred her vision, she tried to clean them away with the back of her hand, but they kept coming and falling, falling, falling.

"Oh, Tikki," She whispered.

The sense of alert took over her body, remembering when she had last seen the kwami, and at the same time memories of new-Marinette let her know that she had lost her. That she had left her behind.

She had not been strong enough. She had not been wise enough. She had not been enough to deserve the superhero title she had.

 _She wasn't supposed to fail._ And if she did, she wasn't supposed to be found, she wasn't supposed to be back. She had ruined everything, and now she was ruined too.

Everything was in vain.

Marinette couldn't control it anymore. She let it all out.

She fell on the ground, hitting her knees against the white tiles. She hugged herself and sobbed uncontrollably while the tears fell like rain showers.

She did not deserve this, she did not deserve this, she did not deserve this!

As the tears fell down, the sadness started to go away, letting space for rage to take over Marinette's body.

The tears did not stop falling, but they were full of new feelings now.

Marinette stood up, she felt her knees aching, and her heart contracting but that didn't stop her.

She looked at herself in the mirror one more time and then she punched it with her right fist.

It didn't shatter immediately, but after three punches there was a crack in the middle of it, and that only made Marinette punch harder, with both of her hands.

She felt the pieces of glass piercing through her skin, she felt the pain running through her and she saw the red blood dripping, first slow, and after every new punch a little bit faster. But it didn't matter, because she was feeling good, she was letting it all out.

Old Marinette, new Marinette, she wasn't sure which was angrier, which was more confused and which one of them was the one that kept punching the mirror. She wasn't sure if she could ever be one, if she could ever be the real her again, the only thing she knew was that moment and how right it felt to canalyze her anger towards something.

She had kept every emotion locked down for so long.

After the fight with Papillon, after Chat Noir's death - _Adrien's_ death-, after defeating Papillon, after discovering who he was and what he wanted, she wanted to scream, she wanted to punch everything, she wanted to let herself be imperfect, she wanted to stop being Ladybug for five minutes and just be a teenager, an angry and emotional teenager. But she did not allow herself that privilege.

Adrien needed her to be the stable one. He never asked, but she knew she had to.

He had died, he had discovered that the horrible villain that they had been hunting down for years was obsessed with his mother and trying to bring her back, and he couldn't talk about that because Marinette was still afraid that something else could happen and had not let him tell her who he was. Even if she did know who he was!

She had fucked up so badly, and she had tried so hard to keep everything in place.

And then he left! He left her and she was angry and sad and desperate to ask him to stay with her but she couldn't do that. And then everything else had happened, and now there she was, in the same place she had been after he left. Nothing had changed, everything was the same horrible mess she had tried to leave behind.

She heard the door opening but her emotions were too overwhelming to pay attention to anything else but the falling mirror in front of her.

"Marinette!"

"Marinette!"

She recognized those voices. But to which Marinette were they calling? Which Marinette were they looking for?

"Marinette!"

Someone took her from her waist and pulled her away from the mirror. She tried to resist, she jostled, she hit the arms of the person dragging her away of the bathroom, but they were stronger than she was, and their hands were not hurt and soaked in blood.

"Let me go!" An agonizing scream came out of her.

"Marinette stop! I don't want to knock you out!"

"Ah!" Marinette

"Help! Willem! Naomi!"

Marinette kept fighting. Punching, shaking and biting her attacker. But she did not free herself.

"Let me go," She begged. She stopped moving and with the surprising change of approach, she fell to the ground.

"Marinette," She felt the hands on her again, tender than before. "It's Nino, everything it's going to be okay, I promise,"

"No!" Marinette gave a strangled scream "No!"

"Nette," Nino hugged her. She did not move, now that she knew who he was, she couldn't. "Whatever it's going through your mind right now, I promise you, we'll figure it out. Is what we have been doing these past months, we'll just add this to our list, okay?"

Marinette did not answer. Nino's voice and his presence were soothing, they always had been, but she was still overwhelmed by her feelings.

"Marinette," Nino said her name with care. "Please let me see your hands, you're bleeding,"

Marinette rolled on her back and sat down on the floor. Still not talking, still not looking at him, she put her hands up, for him to look at that.

"Oh, Marinette," He said, not touching her hands but placing his hands very close to them, "C'mon, let's go back to the bathroom, I'll need water,"

"Don't wanna," Marinette mumbled.

"Please, I need water to heal your wounds, Marinette," He said.

Marinette chuckled, but there was no sign of happiness in it, "Of course, now you have powers too,"

Nino looked at her, eyes widening "What do you mean?" Then he kneeled, still looking her from above, but closer, with accusatory eyes. "Mari, your… your me- what do you remember?"

Marinette let out a bronx cheer "Everything? Nothing? I wish it could be one or the other, but to have both is driving me mad," Marinette let out a big laugh, again no emotion was contained in it.

"Mm.."

A door crashed open and Marinette heard steps approaching, then she saw the man standing from above.

"Oh jee, what happened?" He asked.

"I punched a mirror," Marinette laughed again. She was starting to sound mad.

"Something is wrong," Nino whispered, "Her energy is all over the place, Willem," _Willem_ , yes, that was his name, the memories of him were forming on her mind.

"I can sense that," Willem said. "But I don't think that's it, her energy is acting out because it's balancing, that's normal,"

"Maybe we need Adrien," Nino said.

"Maybe," Willem nodded, "I'll call him,"

" _No_ ," Marinette said, looking at Willem. She liked him, Willem was nice, he had been the nicest to Marinette, he was still unfamiliar but she knew Willem was not going to do anything if she opposed to it, " _No Adrien_. I don't want anything to do with Adrien,"

Marinette realized her bad choice of words too little too late. The look on the men faces was enough for her to tell that she had only managed to worry them more.

" _Now_ , I don't want any- I don't want to see Adrien _now_ ," She said, and then something popped in her mind, "Nor Alya,"

"Okay, I won't call him but, you should follow Nino to the bathroom, those are some serious wounds, Marinette,"

Marinette sighed, "You're nice,"

Willem furrowed his brows. Was it really that easy to realize that she had changed?

"I'm sorry I can't stand, my hands are starting to hurt pretty badly," She said in a tiny voice.

"Don't worry about it, Nette,"

 **xx**

If Marinette hadn't been on Nino's arms when she entered the bathroom, she would have fainted by the amount of energy that the square space was irradiating. She had been so overwhelmed by her own emotions and by her own magic, that she did not feel the other energies swirling around, but now she did.

Feeling energies had not been something that came naturally to her, it took her time to dominate the ability. She wasn't like Adrien.

For him, it was inherent and to this day he probably did not know about it, because his _normal_ was to feel every energy on the universe. A consequence of his destructive magic, since most of the energies that existed, leaned more towards their creative and positive sides than their destruction counterparts.

Marinette looked around and did her best to identify every energy she was sensing.

It was easy to recognize Willem's, not only because it was the only energy similar to Chat Noir's, but because he was standing next to her and Nino. It was just as easy to recognize Nooroo's energy.

She had cohabitated with him in her body for so long, that she couldn't mistake it for anything else.

"Where's Nooroo?" She asked.

"Resting," Willem said, "He is back on his stone, and Nino made a water bubble for him so he could heal faster,"

"Is it cold?" Marinette looked at Nino, "Butterflies don't like the cold,"

"Oh, _we noticed_ ," Nino's eyes bugged out. "You went crazy when the temperature of the bathtub severely dropped down, I assume that was all his doing,"

"So he won't be cold?"

"He won't be cold," Nino smiled.

Marinette felt the new energy before seeing it. And when Wayzz entered the bathroom, she couldn't help but smile.

"Hi, little green one," She waved at him, which wasn't the smartest option because her hands were still stained with blood.

"Marinette!" He flew towards her and landed on her cheek. Leaving a soft kiss, "I remember you now! I remember you as Ladybug, I remember when Master Fu chose you!"

"You do?" Nino asked surprised, "So that's down too?"

"Apparently," Willem said, looking at the green kwami, "Let's talk about this later, we need to treat Marinette's wounds,"

And so they did.

Nino transformed and opened the tap of the bathtub so he could get some water. He made a big bubble and immersed Marinette's hands on it. Then it started glowing. Marinette could feel the magic radiating from Nino's hands towards hers.

"Marinette, can I ask what happened when you woke up? It's okay if you're not ready to talk, we can do it later,"  
"I know you need to know," Marinette said, still looking at her hands, "But I'm still trying to understand it myself. I don't think I ever will, but I'll have to try," She sighed, "I'm gonna say something and I don't want any questions after that, we will change the subject,"

"I promise," Willem said.

"I woke up, in my mind, I'm not supposed to be here, I'm supposed to be away. In my mind, I'm eighteen, but I also know that I'm twenty-four, and I look myself in the mirror and that's _me_ , I recognize myself but at the same time, that's not me, that's an impostor,"

She felt the mood change, the tension growing.

"Are you… are you sure you don't want Adrien?" Nino asked in a fearful whisper.

"A hundred percent sure, don't bring him into this. Not yet,"

"Listen, I'm not trying to make you angry, and I understand your stand because I always try to put Adrien's safety and well being first, but he must be losing his mind at work thinking about you, and I really think-"  
"I don't care what you think, Nino," Marinette interrupted before he could finish. "I know you all are involved in my problem now, but I never planned for you to be. I'm thankful for what you've done, all of you, _really_ , but this is my problem to solve, so I'll do it as I want to. And I don't want Adrien yet,"

"But,"

"I think we should do as Marinette says, Nino," Willem put on a face that Marinette laugh.

"Yeah, I think I like you a lot," Marinette smiled.

"I think you are taking this too lightly," Nino said, "We did this plan because you begged us to, you know? You wanted to do it as fast as possible because you wanted to be able to help us. I understand that you're confused and angry but I think it's selfish and irresponsible that you want us to keep us in the dark. Especially Adrien and Alya who are the ones that have suffered the most,"

Marinette clenched her teeth so hard they chirped.

There were so many words that crossed her mind at that moment. So many things that she could say back and let out all her anger towards Nino.

 _What did he know?_

He had his miraculous for what? Five years at most? What did he know about anything? How could he say that Adrien and Alya were the ones that suffered the most? How could he know anything about her when he had left just like Adrien did? And who was him to order her around and call her selfish and irresponsible? She was Ladybug, she had been protecting the city of an insane old guy obsessed with his old crush. She had saved his life a handful of times! He knew nothing, nothing at all!

She was so ready to say everything that crossed her mind but at the moment that she opened her mouth, nothing came out, something stopped her.

Marinette looked at her hands, still glowing, surrounded by water, there was no more dripping blood and a few scars were already appearing on her knuckles.

Nino was doing his best to help her, but he had emotions too. He had been losing nights of sleep trying to help them out, he was probably still training to caught up with Adrien (and now her). Nino's words came from a really good place, they were the words of a friend, he just did not choose the best time to say them.

Marinette blew a raspberry. She was used to be the bigger person, she could do that for Nino too.

"When are my hands going to be okay?" She asked, managing to leak a little bit of her anger in the tone of her words.

"Five minutes, I can't cure them completely, you'll have a few scars left,"  
"New ones for the collection," She shrugged, "Once we're done here, I wanna go to my apartment," The apartment she knew she had, the apartment she could see in her head, but calling it _hers_ was odd.

Nino's eyes popped open, then he furrowed his brows.

"Did you hear a wo-

"Nino," Willem called out.

"Marinette just woke up, and we still need to know about Nooroo. Adrien and Alya are coming back in the afternoon, I think she should stay here until they arrive and get a say in this,"

"I'm my own person and I just really need to go to my apartment," Marinette said. _Don't let the anger win, don't let the anger win, be as sweet as you can._

"Marinette, I don't think you're understanding the situation here. I think the best course of action right now is for you to stay here, and maybe run some tests on you-"

"I'm not a guinea pig," Marinette spat. "And I know you're worried but I just need a time with myself. _Alone_. Stop judging my decisions. I'm asking you to please take me to my apartment, but if you won't, I'm going there myself and there's nothing you can do to stop me, Nino,"

" _Ma-ri-nette,_ listen to what I am saying. We drove you to the edge of death only to bring you back, you were unconscious for three days and when you wake up, I find you smashing a mirror, freaking out and bleeding. You're not in your right state of my mind,"

Marinette burst into a big laugh that died down rather quickly.

Oh, Nino was clueless.

"Nino, I have not been in my "right state of mind" since I fought Papillon. I think I started losing my mind even before that," She clenched her teeth, "I woke up realizing my plan had failed and I have memories of the catastrophic consequences of that fail, so give me some slack, and please do as I say without questioning me, alright? Just because this plan from three days ago worked out, doesn't mean everything is ready and set to go. I have to figure out some things first, and you're in no position to order me around. You know nothing about the miraculous, you know nothing about me, no matter how hard you are trying to act like a guardian, you are years overdue. So, do as I say and take me to my apartment,"

Nino narrowed his eyes, a shadow crossed his face before looking at Willem who looked taken back by Marinette's words.

Nino sulked at her but finally spoke "Alright, _let's do as Ladybug says_ ,"

 **xx**

The road to her apartment was uncomfortable.

She regretted the words she had said. It was what she felt and she did not think they were wrong, but it was the way that she had said them what had been wrong. She had tried to keep it, but in the end, her emotions took the best of her (as they always did).

She wished Willem could have driven her, but he had to stay in the house, close to Nooroo so it could keep his energy balanced as he recovered.

Marinette wanted to pass by the room Nooroo was staying, to see how it was doing but they wouldn't allow her. Her energy was still all over the place so it could only hurt Nooroo. She did not refuse, she wouldn't do anything to hurt Nooroo, she already did enough.

She only hoped Nooroo could recover soon so she could see the little kwami again. She had so much to say and so many things to apologize for.

When they arrived to the building, Marinette was ready to say goodbye, but Nino parked the car and got out of the car with her.

Marinette stood in front of the building's entrance and could not help but smile.

She touched the door and felt the energy come from the knob to her fingertips. And it was just like that when she was in and started going upstairs.

Her energy and Adrien's energy was stronger and stronger at every step when they reached the last floor the matching energies were collapsing into each other, but Adrien's energy was definitely the strongest one.

"This place reeks of Adrien," She whispered. It was an expression she had taken from Tikki, who instead of feeling energies could smell them. She always described her energy as sweet caramel and Adrien's, well _Chat Noir's,_ like dark chocolate, so she couldn't help but think of that when she felt his energy once again.

It had not been this strong in his house, the energy there was mostly from his powers and that felt different, not as personal as his own energy on the space he lived felt like.

"Yeah," Nino nodded, "So, we're here. I have to go, I'm having lunch with Alya," _A warning_.

"Don't tell her," Marinette begged, "Not yet,"

"I can't lie to her, Marinette," He spun on his heels and started walking to the stairs.

"Nino," Marinette called, he turned back, "Give me five, _no_ , six hours. Then you can inform everyone that I'm awake and a little crazy,"

" _Five hours_ , Marinette?" Nino said, "I'm already breaking my promise to Adrien, don't ask me for more, I can't keep it from Alya, she'll ask"

"Please, I need my time alone and she-

"Then ask her for time alone," Nino said, "She is worried sick about you, I won't sit in front of her and act like everything is fine and that you're still sleeping. I can ask her to give you time, to wait for you to call her but I won't lie to her,"

"Beg her," Marinette answered, realizing she wasn't going anywhere. "Beg her not to come, and take care of her while she freaks out… please,"

"Five hours, Marinette," Nino said, "I won't call Adrien in five hours, but as soon as the clock ticks and those five hours pass, he'll know,"

 **xx**

Marinette sighed.

She shut the door with anger and fell to the ground, pressing her back on the wall next to the entrance.

Nino had never been so cold towards her, and it hurt.

She deserved it after what she said to him, she did not expect him to be as kind as he always was, but she was still taken back by how harsh one look could be. Nino had the sweetest resting face any person could have, and to get such a different and cruel expression from him was painful.

She was trying to do her best so she could fix all the broken things around her, but she was only making them worse.

She hid her face behind her hands and let out a muffled scream.

The following scream was not because of frustration, but because of fear.

She felt a furry creature rubbing on her legs, and she could not help but jump startled and crawl away from the creature, but it followed her.

Marinette looked at the black cat in front of her, pressing its body to her leg.

 _A cat._ A cat had scared her. A cat that was looking at her confused.

 _A cat named Adrien._ She saw the memories quickly enough to remember the embarrassing detail.

Could she be any more pathetic? Apparently hanging pictures of him on the wall had not been enough, she had to rescue a cat from a shelter and name it after the boy she loved.

She took the cat on her arms and paced across the room as she petted it.

The black cat would work as a substitute for her real black cat. Maybe that's exactly why, _unconsciously,_ she had adopted the animal.

She gave two rounds around the apartment, looking first the living room, dining room, and the kitchen and then going to her room and bathroom.

The apartment was nice. It was spacious enough and the decoration was just as she liked. She had been afraid that the memories she was getting were fallacies and that the apartment would be anything but what she liked it.

"It seems like I kept my good taste, kitty," She looked at the cat and kissed the top of his head, almost getting scratched in return, "You're mean, I was only asking for some love,"

Marinette let the cat on the floor and followed his path to her room. He jumped from the carpet to her bed and stayed there after finding a comfortable spot to lie on.

Marinette leaned on the frame of the door and looked around, it was the third time she analyzed the room and it was okay, nothing to whine about except the lack of pictures on the walls but that could be fixed. What really had her uneasy was what her closet would look like.

She took regrettable decisions in the six years she had been trapped and another part of her had been remaking her life. Working for Gabriel Agreste, for example, was a horrible choice, she swore she would never ever in her life work for someone who treated his son like that, so considering _that_ bad decision, she was prone to have many more, especially in fashion.

She wasn't afraid of her clothes, those were easy to throw away and replace, she was afraid of the designs she was going to find in there, and she was not prepared to see that. The uncertainty of what her designs and her technique could be like now was killing her.

If she changed, if she _lost,_ her designing style, her way of creating art, she was going to be devastated. That was what made her, _her_ , that was essential for her identity if she didn't have her art, she was nothing.

If she took into consideration what she really wanted, she would have ignored the closet and waited until she was calm and at ease to start looking at it, because she was feeling like a hot wire about to snap and she was desiring some peace and quiet, but what she wanted was not what she needed. She needed to sort her thoughts and not use all her anger and energy to smash things as she had already done, she had to canalyze her frustration, she had to make it useful, make it a way to organize her thoughts. And if "parasite-Marinette" was not a liar, she had a notebook that could help her with that.

She had not kept a diary in the six years after the accident, which was another of those bad decisions Marinette wanted to punch herself for, but at least she had written down all her worries, dreams and guesses on a brown leather notebook that she hid in a box inside of her closet.

So, with eyes closed, Marinette opened the doors of the closet and kneeled down so she could reach the box. She did her best to not look up at the hangers and the shelves where all the designs that she would have made over the course of six years could be.

She had to move a few pairs of shoes and a basket with belts until she reached the box at the end of the closet.

She dragged the box out of the closet and closed the doors with a strong thud so she would not peek by accident.

The box was nothing extravagant, just an old shoe box but when she opened it, it revealed how special it actually was. Maybe it was more special to "this Marinette", the one that remembered her past because just by taking one glance to all the objects, a wave of love hit her.

Marinette had been trying to find answers with this items, taking them home, not knowing what they really meant to her, but seeing them now, she understood perfectly why each object was there.

Especially, the stack of pictures on top of everything. She took them out of the box and untied the ribbon, watching the first photo of the pile. She had seen this one only a week or two ago but now she smiled from ear to ear, instead of staring at it with confusion.

She remembered that day.

Alya had seen her and Adrien discussing a school project, Marinette had used her sketchbook to explain Adrien what they had to do and because of it, he had seen a few of her drawings. He spent half an hour looking through the pages and asking her questions about her designs. Alya had portrayed a mundane moment, but for Marinette the moment was precious.

Marinette kissed the picture and put it back in the box, she tied the ribbon around the stack and took the stained leather notebook out. She set it at one side and closed the box, putting it right next to the doors of the closet, but not placing it back on its spot.

Marinette crawled to her bed, she reached for a pen on her nightstand and came back to pick up the notebook from the floor. She sat in the rug at the side of the bed, leaning against the bed, she took a big deep breath before opening the notebook.

Marinette started reading the notebook on a random page. She twirled the pen between her fingers and started reviewing her annotations. She went forward and backward, trying to see if there was a pattern of sorts or if she had created a timeline somewhere, but she only found senseless scribbles.

Between all the "dreams" and "fake" tags she had added to her notes, the notebook was a mess. A mess that represented how desperate she really was for getting answers.

Marinette sighed. It made more sense now that she could see it from both points of view. She, _the impostor_ , was so reluctant to find more about her past because she, _real Marinette,_ had been inside preventing her to do that.

It was still odd to think of her as two different entities, but she still couldn't feel like one person.

It had been shocking when she woke up, but now she was serene, not completely at ease but she could be more logical at least, and the "other Marinette" was not so different of who she was.

She still made horrible, regrettable decisions and had a terrible character at times, a non-like-Marinette-personality, but all of her loved ones loved her still. The change wouldn't have to be so abrupt if they still enjoyed her presence.

This was probably the consequence of her magic and Tikki's collapsing with _that_ energy. She had tried to protect herself, and Tikki had tried to stop her of doing an irreversible mistake, while whatever creature was inside of that stone had tried to keep her with it.

Marinette bit the top of the pencil and gave another look to the messiest pages in the notebook, looking for clues or parts of her unconscious that could help her out to sort her mind or find a piece of information that she could not be able to get now.

After half an hour of reading and reaching for answers, Marinette was defeated.

There was nothing new on those pages, or at least nothing unsolved. All the questions she had highlighted were answered by Marinette's past memories, others had been only dreams and thoughts that she had confused with a past that did not exist.

Marinette threw the notebook away and let her head fall back to the bed.

Everything was useless.

She still felt like two people, she was back on square one when it came to her original plan and Tikki was not with her.

She growled. Nothing could put her mind at ease. She had tried so hard to fix everything, she had done her research and she did what she believed had been the perfect -and the only- plan, but she had failed. She had failed stellarly!

She had mentally written a list of things that could not go wrong by any means, and all of them had gone wrong!

 ** _She had not defeated the mysterious energy._**

 ** _She had not managed to save anyone._**

 ** _She came back._**

 ** _Adrien knew!_**

Adrien was never supposed to know! The plan was winning and defeating, and never tell him a word about it, the other option was to die and then he would never have his answers. But there she was alive and with every memory intact in her mind and with the repercussions of her failures following her.

Marinette laughed. Her thoughts were the ones of a crazy person, but wasn't she one? After all, she had gone through it would be impossible for her mind to remain healthy. She would need a good therapist and intense psychiatric care once everything was over.

Because it had to be over right? Her plan had not work but she wasn't dead and that had to mean something. It was actually a good augury, she escaped the powerful enemy force and none of the other miraculous holders had done that before, all of them had succumbed or died fighting. But not her, she had survived. It meant that there was a way to defeat it, she just had to find that way. Tikki had been skeptical about it, but now Marinette was sure that there should be a way to win.

Marinette crawled on the floor until she reached the notebook, she passed through the pages really fast, just peeking and trying to remember if any of the things she wrote sounded familiar to what had been happening to her.

She probably was not going to find anything of sorts on the newest entries, because Adrien had been around, and the calls had not been loud when he was still by her side.

That didn't mean that she had not been listening to the voice before, but his energy had been protecting her for those months and once he left, the calling was unstoppable, finding new ways to reach her every day.

There were flashbacks of what she had lived on the cave, but those didn't tell her anything that she did not know, and she could not trust those images either because nothing that had happened there was reliable.

There was no callings or dreams similar to the ones she had before written on the diary. She wondered why. Could that be because Nooroo was inside of her? Nooroo and Tikki had not been able to sense anything until they were extremely close to it, it had been Marinette who had guided them the whole time. That could explain it, but she'll had to test it. She would have to wait until her energy was in balance and ascertain if the theory was valid.

A shiver went down Marinette's spine, cutting her train of thought.

She dropped the notebook and stood up. She looked at the watch on top of the nightstand. It had only been an hour and a half, she must have been imagining things.

Marinette pinched the skin on her arm. The sensation did not leave.

He _was_ here, she could feel him. It was not his past energy, the tingling sensation was not produced by energy residues of him, it _was_ him.

Adrien's energy had been comforting before, but now the embrace was peace in a bottle and she was ready to drink it.

She ran to the living room and then to the door. She heard the footsteps of her cat following her and stopped to look back at him, being reminded of something that as unfamiliar as it was made her laugh with true joy.

Cat-Adrien hated human-Adrien. Actually, the cat looked a little bothered, more confirmation that she was not dreaming about his presence.

She pressed her body to the wood door, with her hand on the knob, ready to open. He was still walking up the stairs, she could not hear it but she could feel the energy growing and filling the space and also her heart.

She knew she had only seen him a few days ago, but she also had not seen him for a month, or technically six years, whatever the time she had been separated from him actually was did not matter, she missed him.

The division of herself made the waiting longer, but when Adrien's magic and the sound of his footsteps reached her flat, the overjoy was louder than any other feeling.

Marinette opened the door so fast and with so much strength that the door squeaked.

That made Adrien turn a little to his left and look over his shoulder.

When his eyes reached her profile, the surprise on his eyes was clear. He did not expect to see her here.

 _He still doesn't sense me._

Adrien's mouth opened wide and he took a step back, crashing into his door. He looked at her as if she was an spirit. He looked scared and confused, like he was trying to put the pieces of a puzzle together and he had another picture to follow that the one that was printed on the pieces.

"I begged Nino not to tell you," Marinette said, running over her words. But she had to say something and she needed to take him out of that confusion state.

"Mari?" He asked. He reached for her but did not move from the place he was standing.

Marinette took three short steps in his direction, standing close to him but not breaking into his personal space, thought she was actually dying to be all over him. He was there, in front of her and she was desperate to touch him.

He was looking so incredibly handsome, so grown, so beautiful and changed but somehow still the same Adrien she always loved.

The butterflies in her stomach were out of control and the tears (she could not believe she still had any water left to tear up) were picking her eyes.

"Oh my.. you're awake! You're awake and, and _here!_ " Adrien cupped her cheeks, a smile so wide was drawn on his lips that Marinette could not keep the tears from falling.

"I'm here," She nodded vigorously and threw herself to his arms. "I've missed you so, so much!" She bawled.

Her whole body was shaking and the sobs and tears made it impossible to keep talking so she closed her mouth, there was going to be time to talk later, now the only thing that mattered were his arms twisting around her, his lips pressing a kiss on her forehead, and his hands caressing her back.

"Oh, princess," He hugged her tightly "It's okay, I'm here, love,"

And in that moment it didn't matter if she was one or two or a million people inside one, because she loved him, every part of her, every version of her was in agreement that she loved Adrien, and that was enough for her to know, that things would get better, because just as every dimension of her loved him, he loved every part of her too.

And maybe she had been wrong before. _He_ could put her mind at ease.

 **xx**

Marinette sat in her bed, hugging her legs and pressing them close to her, pressing her cheek against her knee.

Adrien was lying right next to her, one elbow against the mattress to hold his weight, his head resting on his hand, his other hand was holding one of her hands, and he was creating patterns on top with his thumb as he read the notebook she had lent him.

Marinette had stopped crying a few minutes ago, after a tight and warm hug and a million kisses all over her forehead and hair from Adrien. Her anxiety levels were on the low side now, and the sobbing had completely disappeared. She was still hiccupping a little though.

Adrien had not asked anything, he just listened as she babbled about the parasite that had been living her life and that was now inside of her and how it felt like every time she tried to absorb that part of her and made her fit into her identity she felt sick to her stomach. He didn't doubt her, he didn't try to dig deeper, he just held her and comforted her.

It would have been easier if he acted as curious as she knew he was because, she had to talk, but where could she begin? There was so much to say, so many secrets she had kept and would explain the situation but she had no idea what she had to say first, unsure of how he could react. It would be easier if he just asked.

Marinette looked at him. He was immersed in her words, he was doing the most to get a clue she must have missed.

That was him, always doing his best, always taking the extra step to please her, to make _her_ happy. How had she been so lucky to get him in her life? Adrien was worth all the bad things that had happened to her. If someone made her an offer to erase all the damage, all the missing opportunities and all the pain from her heart but in interchange, she would have to erase him too, then she would say no. She wouldn't doubt it. Absolutely no hesitation.

A thought crossed Marinette's mind. Maybe the best thing to start with was with an apology.

"Adrien,"

"Princess," He closed the notebook, and lifted his chin, his eyes locking with hers.

Marinette's breath got caught on her throat; Adrien was looking at her with stars on his eyes and Marinette felt herself melt into a gooey puddle of love.

He was so handsome, he did not look like a kid anymore, he was manly and gorgeous and the glasses he was wearing, oh, they made him look so cute!. Marinette felt like she was going to collapse.

The memories of the past days, the words he had said, the hugs and the love they had shared were filling her mind, making her cheeks burn and her heart want to go out of her chest, because being around Adrien was safe haven, it was quiet like the water on a lake, the type of feeling you get only when you are deeply in love; but the part of her that was still eighteen years old was having a stroke just by looking at the handsome man in front of her, who looked at her with so much love that his eyes would have been shaped like hearts and it would have been subtler.

The duality of the experience was both fascinating and frustrating. It was the blend of adult feelings and teenage hormones, that should not be there, going crazy and making her feel things she did not know she could still feel.

But she did her best to keep her head on top of her shoulders and do what she had to do.

"I can't begin to explain how sorry I am for all of that I've put you through," She whispered.

Adrien paled and started blinking really fast.

"I decided to do this alone because I really believed it was the best choice. I wanted to end with it quickly and I thought I was strong enough to deal with it by myself," Marinette bit her lip. Tears were threatening to fall once again. "I never meant to hurt you, it was the last thing I wanted,"

"Oh, bug," Adrien sat and looked her from her eye level. He cupped her cheeks and kissed her nose, "I know, Mari. There's nothing for you to be sorry about,"

"There is, Adrien, there is so much," She nodded. "Once you hear the whole story you will see,"

Adrien kissed her forehead, he dropped his hands at each side of her and kept the distance between them. Silence took over the room.

Was he expecting her to talk? Probably. Was she going to? She had to, but she didn't want to, not yet. Being with Adrien like that was more magical than any other experience, that had actually involved magic.

"I don't know where to start," She broke the silence, not saying exactly what she wanted to say.

"Wherever you want, wherever you consider important," He said.

Marinette nodded. This was it, she had to say something, anything that could help her keep talking. Adrien wanted to know and he deserved to know, right now her personal desires did not matter. She could talk, she could tell Adrien what he had to know, what he was supposed to tell him years ago.

Marinette opened her mouth but no words came out. She did it again and Adrien gave her a look.

"Or if you don't want to start, that's okay too," Marinette's sighed of relief came too fast, and once she realized how obvious she must have been, she blushed, embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"Marinette, stop apologizing," Adrien cut, "You have no duty to talk, bug. You can say what you need to say, whenever you're ready,"

"I just need calm before the inevitable storm arrives," Marinette's mouth set in a hard line.

"I understand that,"

"I know you do, but is still not what I should do, you're way too understanding. It's wrong to keep things to myself just because I'm scared or feel unprepared"

"No it's not. You're a person Marinette, you're allowed to put yourself first," Adrien insisted, "When you're ready, I know you'll talk to me,"

"I was ready to talk to you once and then I backed out," Marinette sighed. "When things started happening I wanted to keep you out of them. I was in a bad place but you were finally getting the chance to breathe, to start a new life away from villains and away from your father, I knew that if I made you stay I would only ruin you, so I kept it hidden. But after you left, the situation just grew, it was eerie and I was frightened. I had to tell you, I needed you here so I started considering it and when I was trying to make out my mind, I… the problem involved you and I _knew_ I had to tell you," Marinette hid her face behind her hands, Adrien took them and left a kiss on her knuckles, encouraging her to keep going, "I couldn't tell you as Ladybug, you would guess how reckless the situation was if I did, so I did not use our phone and when I tried to call you, you never answered. You had no social media profiles whatsoever -except that Instagram account that I'm sure was managed by people at Agreste's- and I doubted that Alya could call Nino and ask for you, so I went to my best next option: Chloé,"

"She told me about this,"

"Then you know that I made her promise not to tell you a word,"  
"Yeah," She could see that that stung him.

"She made me change my mind. She told me all about your life in the US and how happy you were and I couldn't destroy that. I can be so selfish when I want to, it's a flaw of mine, but I could never be selfish if that would break you," Marinette let out a sigh "So, I decided to do it alone,"

Adrien's jaw clenched. Was because he was angry at her? Was because he was angry at himself? That sounded like a thing Adrien would do, put all the blame over his shoulders, but this time he had to understand that there was nothing to feel guilty about. All the wrongs were hers.

Adrien did not speak and long minutes passed, the tension lingering in the air.

Marinette could not take the feeling, he was the only thing that was keeping her from losing her mind, to see him so distressed and quiet was playing tricks on her mind.

"You're not saying anything," She said, waiting for an answer.

Adrien shrugged "I have a lot of crazy thoughts and I want to say a thousand words but you will reject every single one of them, and because I don't want to push you, it's better if I don't say anything. As I said before, I know you'll tell me every secret when you're ready," Adrien threw his head back, he shook his head, his hair jumping everywhere, and he came back to the same position he had before "It's been a week of heavy emotions, and right now you're not feeling your best. I have not been the most understanding partner in the past two days and I've added more stress than the one you already are feeling, I don't want to do it anymore,"  
"You're allowed to ask, you're allowed to push me and get your answers. I can talk about it, it's just hard, as I said, I only want to be calm for a moment before the inevitable mess that it's around the corner hits me in the face, but if _you_ ask-

"How long do you think you can be at peace before you start stressing out because you're keeping things a secret?" Adrien asked, completely changing the mood of their conversation.  
Marinette rose a brow, confused. Adrien rose a brow too, accompanied by a smirk and a challenge written on his forehead.

"I don't know, Adrien. _A day?_ Maybe two if I really really try? This is really serious, and I said I want to ignore it but not that I really can, so-"

"A day it's fine," Adrien, threw himself back, bouncing on the mattress. He rolled on the bed, and pulled her by her hand towards him, embracing her in a hug when she fell. "Tomorrow we'll have a normal day. So, so, _so_ normal you'll get bored of how mundane it is. Your calm before the storm, alright?"

"But… do you really think I should do that?"

"Yes," Adrien nodded, "There's no rush. Tomorrow we are not superheroes, tomorrow we won't be involved with any kind of magic. Tomorrow we'll live like we have all the time in the world, and the day after tomorrow we can go back to worry and stress out about this, but tomorrow it's another reality. Are you in?"  
"I don't think we should, what if-

"Stop worrying about what you should do, it's been six years and nothing irreversible or catastrophic has happened! I think we can give us a little bit of time to figure this out, so, do you want to spend a day with me, being a normal person?"

Adrien tilted his head to the side, he leaned closer to Marinette and a rose a brow. There it was again, that challenging look.

Marinette chewed her lower lip, she tried to avoid Adrien's sight and think about his offer using the logic side of her. But there was nothing logical about it, it was everything but what they should be doing. It was selfish and pure emotion and she should not say yes, she should keep her mind on track and do her best to organize her thoughts and give Adrien all the information he needed, so they could figure it out this together.

However, Adrien had asked her what she wanted, not what she had to do, actually he had been very serious about her brushing off her duties and focus on her desires. And after that analysis, the answer came quickly.

"Yes. Yes, I do,"


End file.
